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 Banzai Ultimo 08/05/2012

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The Morbidly Obese Man
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PostSubject: Banzai Ultimo 08/05/2012   Wed Nov 25, 2015 7:38 am



Jim Jackson:  "Good evening ladies and gentlemen and children of all ages!  Welcome to the greatest wrestling show on this side of the continent, Banzai Ultimo!  We have a great great show for everyone watching tonight.  Joining me tonight as usual is my partner here at the announce booth, Mick Mooney!"

Mick Mooney:  "Aloha dudes and dudettes!  As Jimbo here said, this will be a totally rad show!  We're gonna see action from every side of the ring tonight so stick around and be privy to awesomeness!"

Jim Jackson:  "Well, let's not keep our audience waiting Mick, I'm sure they are all as excited as we are to get the show rolling.  So without further ado...  LET THE ACTION BEGIN!"






The scene opens up with Johnny Fortune in a flower shop picking up his customary roses the shot shows Fortune paying the counter-girl as he turns to the camera

Johnny Fortune: "Today as you see, I'm buying my roses and I buy roses because they are a simple flower that is extremely common and simple but still beautiful. I guess you could say It's simply Beautiful. And I'm a simple man, not simple minded but simple, Now Mr. Cameraman follow me outside for a second."

Fortune guides the cameraman outside to a big city setting with multiple restaurants and a large amount of traffic. Fortune steps in front of the Camera.

Johnny Fortune: "Now look at this we've got a big city with what I'm sure is filled with pain and suffering, Suffering from the plague of a big city feel, Yet there is a beauty to be found in a place where most people would think there is no beauty. What people need to learn is that gravity keeps man and woman on the Earth but it drags down our soul when negative energy is put on our shoulders. I have two losses and must accept that I cannot let those losses harm my soul and as for my match against Richard Johnson I'll keep it simple. I can find beauty in any situation and when I step into the ring with you I hope you will be able to find the beauty in your loss. And if you can't that's Simply Unfortunate!"

Fortune leaves as the camera pans to the sign of the flower shop that reads "Simple Beauties" and then fades to black






The camera bounces with each step the cameraman takes as he follows Alexander Conway through the parking lot.  Out of one of the RVs steps The Morbidly Obese Man.  Alexander Conway walks towards him with the camera in tow before stopping in front of the large man.

Alexander Conway: “Can you believe how big of a fool Marcus Troy is?  That twit actually thought that he was getting the better of us last show by booking us in a match against Allister and his hand-picked partner.  In reality, all Marcus did was sentence Allister to his doom by acceding to our desires.  Tonight, we’re going to crush Allister’s little dream of becoming anything more than a mere afterthought when we retain our titles, like we always do.  We’re the best team in the business, a makeshift tag team simply isn’t going to be able to come anywhere near defeating us.”

Conway flicks a hand through his hair.

Alexander Conway: “Another team shall fall before the team of Excellence, Inc.  It has been prophesied, and so it shall be.  Separately, we are the two best wrestlers on this roster.  Together, we are undefeatable.  Insolent whelps like Allister need to learn that no matter what they do they cannot change the facts.  This is our federation; no one is going to change that…no one.”

Alexander lets his proclamation hang for a moment before smirking at his tag team partner.

Alexander Conway: “But I have to ask you, are you ready to inflict some pain unto some vermin?”


The Morbidly Obese Man smirks as he replies to his partner.

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Of course!  That little whelp will be but a smear on the canvas when I'm done with him tonight."

A loud growl is suddenly heard from the big wrestler's belly.

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Um, I'm gonna grab something to eat first.  I'll meet you backstage later..."

The Morbidly Obese Man turns around and heads out looking for some food as his partner enters the building and the the scene cuts to black.




VS

Johnny Fortune VS Richard "The Dragon" Johnson

Jim Jackson: "It's time for the first contest of the night with a ladies man going up against a dragon."

Mick Mooney: "Just to clarify he isn't actually a fire breathing dragon. They don't exist."

Jim Jackson: "I doubt the fans actually believed he was a dragon. Its a nickname to describe his ferociousness in ring style"

Mick Mooney: "No I'm pretty sure they thought he was a dragon."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, standing in at 5 feet 11 and 1/2 inches tall, weighing in at 177 pounds, hailing from San Francisco, California... JOHNNY FORTUNE!"

The lights dim as you hear Fortune's voice yell "Where are all the beautiful ladies tonight" as "DANCE" by Justice plays Fortune comes out holding a bouquet of roses and as he walks towards the ring begins handing them out to women in the audience. He enters the ring climbs to the second turnbuckle and blows kisses to women in the audience.

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for tonight, standing at 6 feet 3 inches tall and weighing in at 235 pounds, hailing from parts unknown... He's the modern day Adonis, RICHARD "THE DRAGON" JOHNSON!"

Suddenly high flames light on, as though the projection screen was set to fire! Richard ''The Dragon'' Johnson makes his way to the ring wearing a cobalt blue silk dobak with a silver twisting dragon from front to back. His black trunks show a large dragon head on the front of his crotch. The Dragon is shielding himself from his magnificence with a pair of mirrored navigator sunglasses. As he steps into the ring, Johnson spreads open his arms to the crowd, which opens up his robe and exposes his muscular body and the dragon head on his shorts.

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE ACTION BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "There's the opening bell and the two competitors are trying to get in the first attack but neither has as much as touched the other. Oh! Fortune just connects with a very stiff chop to the chest of the modern day adonis."

Mick Mooney: "That hurt just watching it."

Jim Jackson: "Fortune with a kick to the leg of the dragon sends him down to one knee. *SMACK!* Johnny with a swift kick to the side of the head of his opponent almost concussing the dragon. He goes in for the pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "One!....Two!...."

Mick Mooney: "A kick out at the two count. I think that kick sounded worse than it actually was."

Jim Jackson: "Fortune is almost daring Johnson to get back to his feet. Just as Dragon got to his feet, fortune send him back down to the mat with what appeared to be a flying neckbreaker."

Mick Mooney: "It was a flying neck breaker. Learn the moves you goober"

Jim Jackson: "Another pin attempt"

Jack B. Nimble: "One!...Two!..."

Jim Jackson; "Another 2 count. The ladies man is once again stalking the body of the dragon waiting for the perfect opportunity to get in an attack."

Mick Mooney: "He is taking too much time dude, He should just get in there while the guy is done and stomp the hell out of him."

Jim Jackson: "Johnny runs in for a clothesline. Dragon Counters! Belly to Belly suplex! Fortune is down for the first time in this match!"

Mick Mooney: "I told you man, He took too much time instead of attacking and now he paid the price for giving his opponent the chance to get his breath back. Look he is even getting pinned"

Jack B. Nimble: "One!...Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Only a two count. The dragon lifts fortune to his feet. Fortune appears to be still feeling the effects of that suplex. Dragon lifts the ladies man up and slams him to the mat with a gutwrench powerbomb!"

Mick Mooney; "You might say that it was a "Dick" move."

Jim Jackson: Dragon is claiming to the top rope. A high risk move but will it pay off? He leaps off the top rope but NO! Fortune gets the knees up at the last second. Dragon appears to be winded."

Mick Mooney: "Watch Johnny! Back Heel kick of the second rope. Timber! and the man goes down"

Jim Jackson: "Fortune signals to the fans that this match is about to be over! Johnny grabs the dragon and puts him in position for an inverted double underhook facebuster then continues to jump and spin impacting Richard's face into the mat. UNFORTUNATE END!"

Mick Mooney: "Dick is down! Dick is down! Fortune on top of Dick!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall, JOHNNY FORTUNE!"

Jim Jackson: "A great way to kick off the show"

Mick Mooney: "Fortune spend to much time looking at Dick rather than getting on top of him and beating him until he was foaming at the mouth. But in the end, Dick met an unforunate end and that was the match over."

Jim Jackson: "Next time, Just say Richard and not Dick."






"Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing on the speakers as smoke is bellowed out from smoke machines. Out from the smoke the figure of Marcus Troy, the general manager of Lucha Libre Puroresu emerges from the back. Dressed in a three piece Armani suit, he quickly strides down the walkway and enters the ring with a mic in one hand and a black bag in the other. The crowd still harboring a dislike for the general manager begins to chant "A-HOLE!" in unison.  Calmly Marcus Troy allows the crowd to settle down before he begins speaking.

Marcus Troy:  "I've never denied the fact that I was an as you all chanted an A-Hole...  And if my being an A-Hole puts out a great show for Lucha Libre Puroresu then by all means I shall wear it like a badge.  But now onto business..."

Marcus Troy opens the black bag and pulls out a new title.

Marcus Troy:  "This is the LLP Lightweight Title...  Many people ask why I am so insistent in bringing in a weight specific title...  Now let me explain...  As you all well know, the lightweight division has some of our more agile and more exciting performers.  In fact, I could say that when lightweights meet in the ring, we can expect exciting matches.  This belt is not here to highlight that the lightweight division is inferior, but it's here to make a statement, the lightweight division is a division that brings a whole new level of performance that it NEEDS a title!"

The general manager lifts the title up in the air and turns around making sure everyone in the big top gets to see it.

Marcus Troy:  "Now on the August 19, 2012 Banzai Ultimo show there shall be a 10-man battle royale for this lightweight title...  The participants of the battle royale will be as follows...  One-half of the LLP tag team champions Alexander Conway, Bob Bobbie, Camerella Videoh, Chasm, Christy Chase, Crusade, "Darkside" Dylan Thompson,  Jolene, Johnny Fortune and Raven Connoly.  So be prepared, for two weeks from now, we shall be crowning ourselves a new LLP lightweight champion!"

With that Marcus Troy turns around and leaves the ring as "Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing again on the speakers.


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PostSubject: Re: Banzai Ultimo 08/05/2012   Wed Nov 25, 2015 7:39 am



The camera shows the outside of a mansion. It is raining and thunder can be heard. The screen flashes and now it shows the inside of the mansion where Shadow Callahan and his 2 female associates are standing near motionless.

Shadow Callahan: "People who believe in what they cannot explain are those who are true to themselves. Those who follow these so called trends are just cattle heading for a disappointing end."

The screen flashes to show a herd of cattle running of a cliff then back to Callahan

Shadow Callahan: "I am not a follower, I am the shepherd in the black, I am your suicide messiah. My coming has been foretold and soon my intentions shall be clear."

Shadow lowers his head

Shadow Callahan: "I shall embrace you and shield you with black wings. The hour is nearly at hand and the purging of man is close."

Shadow raises his head with a sick sadistic grin on his face

Shadow Callahan: "All shall fade to black except those who have been chosen to help lead the world into a new age of salvation and unending devotion. I am here to help you...."

His face changes to that of no emotion

Shadow Callahan: "For I am not alone."

The camera flashes to a clock with his stopped before fading to black.



VS

Jim Jackson: "Well in the next match, we will see 2 former world champions collide in what should be an epic confrontation."

Mick Mooney: "One of the Hottest women in pro wrestling today, Raven Connoly, steps into the ring with the "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson. And that's all i got to say."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, standing in at 5 feet 8 inches tall and weighing in at 141 pounds, hailing from Chicago, Illinois... RAVEN CONNOLY!"

Smoke begins to bellow from the entrance as 'Living Dead Girl' by Rob Zombie plays over the speakers. After a few moments Raven Connoly emerges from the smoke. She looks around the big top tent at the fans, she then throws her fist in the air and lets out a battle cry. Raven runs down the aisle and slides into the ring. She climbs up the turnbuckle and throws her fist in the air and screams again, before doing a back flip and landing in the center of the ring.

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next, his opponent for the evening, standing at 6 feet 6 inches tall and weighing in at 250 pounds, hailing from Calgary, Alberta Canada but resides in St. Louis, Missouri... "UNSTOPPABLE" JACK JOHNSON!"

"Bring It" by Trapt blasts over the arena as every single fan in attendance jumps out of their seats and cheers. "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson enters the stage through a spark shower. He makes his way to the ring. He enters the ring and climbs a turnbuckle, He taunts to the fans and scouts the entire arena.

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this evening is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE ACTION BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And That's the bell and we are under way! UJJ just casually walked up to Raven and gave her a chop right to the chest. Raven replies with a chop of her own. It seems these two have engaged in a chopping war. Raven leaps into the air......and connects with a dropkick."

Mick Mooney: "Actually it looked like that dropkick barely even hit Jack Johnson but it looks like he is selling it anyway. Look at how fast he made it back to his feet."

Jim Jackson: "Raven now back on the attack with a series of punches. UJJ blocks and proceeds to unleash a flurry of forearm shots. He bounces of the ropes and is charging in for something. He jumps and connects with a flying shoulder tackle sending Raven straight down to the mat!"

Mick Mooney: "Jack is lifting Raven up over his head, you know she isn't that heavy so it doesn't take much out of him. Oh! What a Backbreaker on Raven! Its like something out of a Batman movie!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ goes in for the cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!..."

Jim Jackson: "No just a two count after the Bane style backbreaker. UJJ lifts Raven back to her feet and appears to be going for a hip toss. But Raven is fighting out of it, how could she have much energy after that sick backbreaker?"

Mick Mooney: "There is nothing a woman likes more than telling a man when he is wrong."

Jim Jackson: "Raven goes for a back heel kick but it completely misses its mark. She must be feeling the effects of match now. UJJ is taking advantage of this mishap and is going for the pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!..."

Mick Mooney: "Yawn. She kicks out at two"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ is pulling Raven up to her feet by the Hair. Raven hits a Superkick out of nowhere! She falls on top of Jack!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!..."

Jim Jackson: "Jack kicks out of the near fall. Raven is now going to apply a sleeper hold on UJJ."

Mick Mooney: "UJJ counters with a Jawbreaker! It was super effective dude and he breaks free."

Jim Jackson: "A series of chops now but Raven tries to block to no avail. Now transitioned into a headlock."

Mick Mooney: "Maaaaaaaaaan...  This match isn't as exciting as I thought"

Jim Jackson: "Raven with punches to the back of UJJ to break free and sends him to the ropes. She does the same and Oh! They both were thinking the same thing and tried to go for crossbodies but they collide and are both on the mat!"

Mick Mooney: "Look at the referee checking his watch"

Jack B. Nimble: "Ring the Bell!"

Jim Jackson: "What happened why is he stopping the match?"

Mick Mooney: "Maybe he was as bored of it as I was"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and Gentlemen! The Referee as informed me that both wrestlers have been knocked out and will be unable to continue to fight, this match has ended in a draw!"

Mick Mooney; "Dude, the crowd isn't happy with this result."

Jim Jackson: "Well nothing we can do there, both wrestlers are down."

Mick Mooney: "Boo Hoo, go tell your problems to someone else, we still have more matches to come tonight and they will be 10 times better than this match!"






The scene opens up with DDTKID sitting on the dirt his back turned towards the camera. He is surrounded by rows upon rows of tombstones as well as a few crypts here and there. The camera pans from left to right until DDTKID says something.

"Darkside" Dylan Thompson: "Life and the decisions people make affecting it are really quite interesting. Crusade is off training for the match and I'm here hanging out with the dead. You see the dead a really quite interesting everyone has a story of wealth and rags triumph and tragedy. However they are still so peaceful to be around which makes it a nice place to clear ones mind."

Dylan lifts up a handful of dirt and allows it to fall through his fingers before continuing.

"Darkside" Dylan Thompson: "Tonight I'll team with Crusade to take on The Rookies along with Buford and Jolene honestly I don't know much about any of you nor do I care. I am here simply to assist crusade and his cause. I'm also here so when it comes time for my dance with death I shall not be a tragedy like of these people. Life and Death are opportunities and you need to to have an open mind if you ever truly wish to be happen. I'll be listening to the stories of the dead a little longer so until to night rookies, Buford, Jolene, and even you Crusade be careful how you use the cards you are dealt lest to become like the fool."




DDTKID lays out the fool tarot card as The scene fades to black with a laugh heard in the background.





Bob Bobbie hurriedly dashes backstage as he tries to put a boot on.

Bob Bobbie:  "Sorry for being late Christy...  I'm sure we can still make it to the ring before our match, they just ended the match between Raven and UJJ!  It's just we trained so hard, I slept like a log, even my alarm didn't wake me...  If you didn't come and get me...  I'm really sorry..."

Bob Bobbie finally gets his boot on and runs towards the entrance tunnel.


Christy Chase:  "Don't worry about it Bob, it's partly my fault for pushing for that late training session.  Besides, this time I'm confident we're gonna win our match.  Now let's hurry up, I think I can hear our match about to begin."

With that the tag team known as The Rookies run towards the entrance tunnel as the scene fades.






The lights in the arena go dim, Suddenly Blind Guardian's "A Voice in the Dark" begins to blast throughout the arena and Green, Red and Blue lighting shine in rhythm to music. Smoke begins to cover the ramp. Allister King makes his way out to the entrance stage wearing a black velvet blindfold. He stands on the ramp and looks out to the crowd. As Allister shouts, pyros goes off at the top of the stage to resemble the breathe of dragons. He begins to slap the hands of all the fans at ringside before rolling into the ring. He climbs to the top turnbuckle, removes the blindfold and poses once more before getting down of the turnbuckle and retrieves a microphone.

Allister King: "Ok, it is time to get straight down to business. You see I have been placed in a tag title match tonight against the defending champions Justin Bieber and John Goodman. Well here is the kind of funny thing."

Allister stops talking and scratches his head before continuing.

Allister King: "I don't have a tag partner. So that is what brings me out here. I need a partner for tonight. I honestly don't give a shit who it is......well except Brostar. Hey! Hey! Hey! Don't look at me like that. I want to win not lead a lamb to the slaughter. So who wants to come out here and offer to become one half of the next tag team champs? Will it be Mick Mooney over there at the commentary desk? Will it be that guy up their dispensing the refreshments? I would like a Coke by the way. Will it be President Obama? Batman? Sheldon from Big Bang Theory? Anyone at all will do...except Brostar."

Allister stands back and waits for someone to come out.


A loud, eerie chanting begins to chime through the big house before The Beast (Evangelion 2.0 soundtrack) begins to play. After a moment Crusade shambles out onto the ring ramp, his matted hair nearly covering his face as he makes his way to the ring. The zealot is wearing a plain blue jean shorts along with wrestling boots, he is bare chested, showing off the tattoo of a cross on his chest. Once near the ring he rolls in, he takes a mic from a ring hand and stands in front of Allister King with a smirk on his face.

Crusade:I don't think we've met Allister. I just came out here to tell you that you should stop your search for a tag team partner, because tonight The Church will be winning our match and soon get a shot at the Tag Team championships. Even if you found a tag team partner to tag with your worthless carcass it would all be pointless. Because I am the chosen one and with me stands The DDTKID another chosen of the great deity. Together we are the best tag team in this promotion. No one shall stop us from taking our rightful place at the top!"

Crusade: "And it's not going end there. Once we win the tag team titles I will win the battle royal and become the first ever LLP Light heavyweight champion!"

Crusade: "Once that happens I'll have to take out the big man Ray Kamaura as well. I'll be the first triple crown champion in the history of this federation, and hold all of the titles at the same time! You can't stops me! Chasm couldn't stop me! NO ONE can stop the Church of the Great Deity! No one!"

Crusade lowers the mic, looking rather heated.


Allister stares at Crusade with a big grin on his face

Allister King: "You wanna know something? I am an Atheist and don't believe in any kind of divine deity so I'm just going to say this. Stop Talking Bullshit. Ahhh No one can stop the Church of the Great Deity rawrrr. I bet you one million billion gazillion dollars that this so called "Great Deity" could stop The Church."

Allister begins laughing at Crusade

Allister King: "I will find a tag partner tonight and I don't give a shit about winning the tag titles, I just want to piss off the current tag champs."

Allister asks to see the show card

Allister King: "Ok ah here you are. The Church vs The Rookies vs Cousin Buford and Jolene. Never heard of any of these teams. I have just barely heard of you and have never heard of your partner. I mean compared to my tag team abilities, You are like a one legged dog at the racetrack. No chance of winning."

Allister spins around and laughs.

Allister King: "Allister 1 The Church 0."

Allister's face turns more serious now

Allister King: "Now get out of the ring and stop interrupting people with your useless bullshit. I mean with what you say actually has a point then go ahead but there was no point was there? I mean i was looking for a partner for the main event tonight and you tell me to stop looking cause you and your partner are going to be next champs? Look that has no relevance to what takes place tonight in the main event does it? No, none, nada, zilch, zero."

Allister motions for Crusade to leave

Allister King: "The king has spoken."


Crusade pops his neck and raises the mic again

Crusade: "It is very relevant, considering if you and whatever worthless partner you find happen to win tonight you will be facing me. And I have this habit of crippling my opponents.."

Crusade keeps his eyes on King.

Crusade: "I don't know if you've noticed King, but I have two victories over Raven Connoly. A multiple time world champion King..Something I don't recall you ever becoming in your worthless, alcohol ridden life."

Crusade: "I know quite a bit about you King, I know that your foolishness has cost you many opportunities in this business. You have won tag championships sure, but you and I both know that you wish you could just win the big one one time in your career right? You haven't really accomplished much of anything in your career have you? That has to hurt no matter how much you pretend not to care. The sins of your past haunt you and bite you every single day. And now your punishment has appeared in front of you. No matter what championship you attempt to gain I will be there to take it away before you can have it."


Crusade smirks again.

Crusade: "Even if you were to win a belt before me I can simply take it away! And if not me The DDTKID has a plethora of skills to bring to this company as well. You think your jokes will save you, fool, but the reality of the situation is that you have talent standing in front of you. More talent than you ever had or ever will have in your pathetic life. And if you cross me or get in the way of my goals I will eliminate you from this company. Perhaps even life itself.."


Allister King: "Yo Calm down, Shogun."

Allister stops and looks at Crusade

Allister King: "Sorry got you confused with someone else who said the exact same thing to me. Well minus the part about the kid. Wait did you just call me a fool?"

Allister walks back before walking closer to crusade

Allister King: "Correction! I am the King of Fools! Former General manager and former tag team champion. Yeah I could have went after the big one but you know how many world title matches I have had in my career? Well if you did your research like you so claim, then you will know that I have only every been given one match in which I actually eliminated myself from."

Allister grins

Allister King: "You and your DDTKID or whatever he is called yeah are young and probably quite talented but you must remember I am still quite young myself. I still have a great career ahead of me and more than likely would kick your ass one on one. What makes you think you could beat me? Because you beat Raven? Dude, so have I. I have also beat Ray Kamaura, Yuki Monotomo and a lot more former champs before you even started thinking about wrestling."

Allister flicks his hair back

Allister King: "I am getting bored standing here in the ring with you. So hurry up with your little rant and leave so I can finally do what I came down here to do."


"Sound Of Madness" by Shinedown starts to play. After a few suspenseful seconds Ray Kamaura emerges from the curtains holding the LLP World Championship Belt high above his head. He has a microphone in his other hand. Ray Kamaura walks to the ring while showing off his belt to the fans, repeatedly saying "I’m the Champ" The Giant, showing no injuries like earlier in the program, steps into the ring and glares at Crusade. Ray swiftly changes his attention to Allister King.

Ray Kamaura: "Honestly, Allister, nothing would please me more than to be your partner for the night. I would simply love to hand, that Canadian's ass to him. Also, While I am at it, I will hand him his partners ass too. All of his partners ass... He has so many."  

Ray Kamaura shoots a glare at Crusade, showing he means business.

Ray Kamaura: "King is right he has beaten me before. So he knows what I can do. I have had some of my best matches Allister. It would be a nice change of pace to team up with him and kick some ass. Besides, this match would give me the perfect chance to show the world how I earned this..."

Ray Kamaura turns back to Allister King and raises the shiny golden belt above his head.

Ray Kamaura: "Who would be a better partner than the LLP World Champion?  Also don't worry about that injured act earlier I was simply trying to take a week off. Sadly it is boring just sitting back there, so now i want to bust some heads. Champions don't just sit around, we take any chance we get to prove we earn our titles. So, Allister King, do we have an accord?"

Ray extended his hand out to Allister King.


Allister Scratches his head

Allister King: "Mmmmmmmmm OK."

Allister extends his hand and shakes Ray's

Allister King: "And there we have it. Tonight live on Banzai Ultimo, Allister King and The LLP World Champion, Ray Kamaura will take on Excellence Inc. for the LLP Tag Team Championships. Tune in live for this once in a lifetime opportunity."

Allister throws the mic in the air and catches

Allister King: "Hail to the Champ and Hail To the King!!"

Allister drops the mic and leaves the ring grinning and begins walking up the ramp


Ray Kamaura:  "While I'm here, let me take a moment to comment on my opponents for the night. They call themselves Excellence Inc. That is a rather ironic name considering they are both far from it. Alexander Conway seems to think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons. He also wears a lot of suits. That's odd because I didn't know you could buy things with monopoly money. The point Is Canada isn't a real country."

Ray pauses as he chuckles a bit.

Ray Kamaura: "But all jokes aside TMOM is fat, just a huge sack of lard. He has more chins than an Asian phone book. He has more rolls than a bakery, It’s funny because he has eaten that many too. TMOM is so fat he needs a boomerang to put on his belt. His moobs are so large, his nipples yodel."

Ray drops the mic and walks out of the arena. Laughing as he goes.


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PostSubject: Re: Banzai Ultimo 08/05/2012   Wed Nov 25, 2015 7:40 am

VSVS

The Rookies VS Cousin Buford & Jolene VS The Church

Jim Jackson:  "Well we have a three-way tag team match is scheduled for this evening...  But before we begin, it seems that our esteemed general manager has a few words he wants to say."

Mick Mooney:  "Yeah dude, the bossman speaks!"

"Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing on the speakers as smoke is bellowed out from smoke machines. Out from the smoke the figure of Marcus Troy, the general manager of Lucha Libre Puroresu emerges from the back. Dressed in a three piece Armani suit, he quickly strides down the walkway and enters the ring with a mic in one hand and a black bag in the other.  Ignoring the loud boos coming from the crowd, Marcus Troy enters the ring and speaks promptly.

Marcus Troy:  "As you all well know, Alexander Conway has been saying I'm not giving the tag team champions enough matches so...  As in another move to make our tag team roster more competitive, the winner of tonight's match will have a tag team title shot!  With that being said, let the match begin and may the best team win!"

The crowd murmurs with excitement as Marcus Troy exits the ring and heads to the back as "Make Then Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse begin to play again on the speakers.

Jasmine Lee:  "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is an elimination three-way match for the number one contender for the LLP Tag Team Titles!  Introducing first, weighing in at  with a combined weight of 335 pounds, the team of Bob Bobbie and Christy Chase... THE ROOKIES!"

The main theme for Star Wars starts to play as Bob Bobbie rushed out from the back in thick rimmed glasses, a white short sleeved polo shirt with a clip on polka-dot tie, slacks and leather shoes. Suddenly the song breaks and "Chasing the Dream" by Alex Kassel starts playing on the speakers as Christy Chase also comes out from the back. Together The Rookies make their way down the aisle and into the ring.

Jasmine Lee:  "Introducing next, weighing in at a combined weight of 487 pounds, the team of COUSIN BUFORD & JOLENE!"

"Rough & Ready" by Trace Atkins begins playing as Cousin Buford and Jolene makes their entrance, someone begins fliping the lights on and off for the most sub-spectacular light show ever.

Cousin Buford:  "Seriously people, if someone doesn't stop whoever that is, they're gonna trip the breakers."

Cousin Buford and Jolene makes their way to the ring.

Jasmine Lee:  "Introducing last, weighing in at a combined weight of 400 pounds, the team of Crusade and "Darkside" Dylan Thompson, THE CHURCH!"

A loud, eerie chanting begins to chime through the big house before The Beast (Evangelion 2.0 soundtrack) begins to play. After a moment Crusade shambles out onto the ring ramp, his matted hair nearly covering his face as he makes his way to the ring. The zealot is wearing a plain blue jean shorts along with wrestling boots, he is bare chested, showing off the tattoo of a cross on his chest. Once near the ring he rolls in, quickly making his way to the back end of the ring to await the start of the match.

Crimson from the streetfighter alpha 3 OST blares on the P.A as the light darkens and fog appears suddenly the lights shine upon the DDTKID wearing a black jacket and red bandana, his back turned holding a kendo stick over his shoulder, He turns around and cracks a smile as he begins walking slowly to the ring. He stops in the middle of the ramp and raises the hand holding the cane. the crowd boos as he just smiles he continues forward and climbs on the side of the apron. He turns his head slowly smiling once more before entering the ring he climbs the turnbuckle lifts the hand with the kendo stick one more time before jumping down, He places down the kendo stick and awaits for the beginning of the match.


Jasmine Lee:  "The referee for this match is Jack B. Quick.  LET THE ACTION BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson:  "It looks like "Darkside" Dylan Thompson and Jolene will be kicking things off tonight.  And there's the bell!  The DDTKID charges in but Jolene sidesteps and takes a hard, stinging chop from Jolene.  Flying elbow off the top rope by Jolene connects!  Spin kick by Jolene to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Jolene strikes The DDTKID."

Mick Mooney:  "Dude, that has gotta suck...  He just got owned by a girl a few minutes into the match.  Jolene tags in her hick cousin dude."

Jim Jackson:  "STIFF high kick on "Darkside" Dylan Thompson  by Cousin Buford. Implant DDT by Buford!  Buford leaps into the air...  A legdrop to the back of the head!  Buford goes for a full nelson...  The DDTKID slips out before the hold gets locked in...  Tag to Crusade!  Slingshot clothesline by Crusade!"

Mick Mooney:  "Whoa dude!  He almost botched it there by slipping on the ropes...  Crusade for the cover!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Jim Jackson:  "Cousin Buford kicks out at two!  Crusade lifts his opponent into the air before dropping them down face first in a gordbuster, as he starts to get up, Crusade lunges forward, kneeing Cousin Buford square in the temple, brutally exexeuting the Damnation!  Buford is down!  Cover!"

Mick Mooney:  "Dang!  I can't believe Crusade lifted that hillbilly dude!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two!  Three!"

Jim Jackson:  "Cousin Buford and Jolene are out!  Bob Bobbie jumps into the ring and quickly stuns Crusade with a spinning kick to the gut!  mplant DDT by Double B!  Diamond Dust from Double B and Crusade is out!  Pinfall attempt..."

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "It's The DDTKID with a stomp for the save!  Whoa!  That Chase chick just dropkicked The DDTKID out of the ring through the second rope!  Nice one!  A tag between the nerd and that Chase chick..."

Jim Jackson:  "The Rookies whip Crusade into the corner. Bob Bobbie whips Christy Chase in for a hard clothesline to follow-up.  Flying reverse elbow by Chase.  Crusade is down, Chase goes for the cover!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "Crusade kicks out at two...  It looks like it'll take more than that to finish off that Preacher dude..."

Jim Jackson:  "Crusade kicks Christy Chase in the gut to reverse the momentum.  Crusade locks in a sleeper hold!  Chase is fading...  she tries to reach out to her partner...  And makes it!  Bob Bobbie jumps in and takes Crusade down with a clothesline!  Legdrop to the back of the head!  Double B is going for a springboard move...  "Darkside" Dylan Thompson sneaks up on the apron and shoves him off!  Crusade goes for a lariat but Double B dodges it and tags in Chase!"

Mick Mooney:  "Ooh!  That Chase chick is fast, Crusade misses with all those big swings as Chase runs around him."

Jim Jackson:  "Crusade finally gets a big right in and stops Christy Chase in her tracks.  Back heel kick off the second rope, Chase goes down.  Tag by Crusade!  "Darkside" Dylan Thompson enters the ring and scoops Chase up...  Crusade bounces off the ropes and hits a Hart attack clothesline!  The DDTKID hooks the leg..."

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "That Chase chick is pretty tough!  I can't believe she like kicked out of that one...  I guess The DDTKID can't believe it either.  Chase rolls away from The DDTKID..."

Jim Jackson:  "Christy Chase hits a spinning back kick!  Flying elbow off the top rope by Chase!  Chase applies a hammerlock but gets elbowed in the face!  Second rope flying axe handle, Chase goes down.  Chase gets back up...  Super kick by The DDTKID!  He goes for the cover."

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "Only a two count...  The DDTKID just can't put that Chase chick away."

Jim Jackson:  "Crusade asks to be tagged in and he gets it!  Crusade charges in but Christy Chase manages to slip away and tags in Bob Bobbie!  Bob Bobbie Irish whips their opponent towards Christy Chase who springboards from the ropes. Christy Chase gets a legscissor on their opponent's head and sends him flying towards Bob Bobbie with a hurricanrana. Bob Bobbie then hits a springboard crossbody on the opponent pinning him executing a Roundabout!  This could be it!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two!  Thr..."

Mick Mooney:  "Whoa!  Beautiful save by The DDTKID with that double axe handle...  Chase charges in but The DDTKID brings the top rope down and Chase goes over and into the outside!  Ooh!  She wiped out dude, skidded face first."

Jim Jackson:  "Bob Bobbie with a flying knee knocks The DDTKID out over the top rope!  Bob Bobbie turns around...  Crusade is there and rolls him up!  He has a fistful of tights and the referee doesn't notice!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two!  Three!"

Jasmine Lee:  "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall and new number one contenders for the LLP Tag Team Championship, the team of Crusade and "Darkside" Dylan Thompson, THE CHURCH!"

Mick Mooney:  "The Church wins and gets a title shot!  Wait who is that entering the ring?  It's Shadow Callahan!  Don't tell me he's also part of The Church!"

Jim Jackson:  "Looks like he is!  It's a three-on-one beat-down on Bob Bobbie!  Someone stop this disgraceful act!"

Mick Mooney: "These 3 men are destroying Bob Bobbie!"

Jim Jackson: "Why are they doing this? The man can't defend himself against these sick individuals!"

Mick Mooney: "And they don't seem to be stopping this assault. But look they are helping him to his feet"

Jim Jackson: "That's not a good thing! Callahan looks like he is about to add the final nail to the coffin!"

Mick Mooney: "Shadow grabs Bobbie and lifts him up onto his shoulder. He then proceeds to grab Bob by the arms and lift him up in a reverse crucifix position. Shadow takes a few steps back before dashing forward and throwing Bob Bobbie face first into the mat causing him to slide a few feet."

Jim Jackson: "He calls that "Black Wings" but it appears that they have finally stopped the attack and are leaving the ring. Someone get the EMTs out here to check on him!"

Mick Mooney: "The Church is expanding and it seems like they are now more of a force to be reckoned with that ever before"

Jim Jackson: "And they are now the Number One Contenders for the LLP Tag Team Championships. You got to believe that this was a direct message to the champs."

Mick Mooney: "If not then they have got a sick way of celebrating a victory"






"Sound Of Madness" by Shinedown beings blasting in the Big Top. After a few seconds of suspense Ray Kamaura, lumbering out, walks slowly onto the top of the ramp, stumbling. A clearly noticeable bandage is wrapped around the top of his head. Ray Kamaura, clearly in a weakened and vulnerable state, reaches back behind him, into the curtain. The music completely stops playing, leaving the crowd in a state of wonder. The music returns in a sudden climax as Ray Kamaura pulls the LLP World Championship belt out and hoists it above his head. The crowd cheers while the Champion struggles to keep the belt in the air. After only a few short seconds, a man brings out a chair for the wounded Champion to sit on. Ray sits down and lays the belt on his lap. The man hands Ray a mic.

Ray Kamaura: "After enduring a hard fought Hell in a Cell match with C4, I was declared the LLP World Champion. I was in a pure state of awe as the cage was raised and the ref handed me my new title. But then I was attacked by an angry coward. C4 lost the match, and then he lost his mind. I was already injured when he decided to attack me even more."

The reeling champ took a moment to regain a little strength.

Ray Kamaura: "I suffered lacerations to my skull almost the entire way around my head… I have four broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder… It has been two weeks sense I endured that Hell in a Cell, and I can barely stand…"

Ray Kamaura chokes back a tear and forcefully stands up and raises the belt above his head, showing his strength. The crowd goes wild at the sight of the LLP Champion standing tall. Ray Kamaura holds the stance for about thirty seconds before he falls back to the chair.

Ray Kamaura: "BUT I AM YOUR NEW WORLD CHAMPION! This belt is vindication for my hard work over the years. It serves to prove that with hard work, and a lot of determination, you can accomplish your goals. After years of tag titles and stables… the BJASPW Invitational cup and Japanese world championship ladder match, after the DWMA, I AM YOUR NEW WORLD CHAMPION!"

A brief pause.

Ray Kamaura: "I would like to say a few words to some only friends and enemies. All of these men who I respect and have bested me a one time or another. I have had some legendary matches with men Like Shogun, Alexander Conway, Zombie, Allister King, and Yuki Monotomo. But I would just like to say… They can kiss my ass. At every turn, I tried to capture a title and was stopped by these men. But two weeks ago, I defeated a man who gave me the toughest fight of my life, despite being a weakling and a coward. I conquered my ultimate goal… and nothing will take this belt from me… NOTHING!!!"

Ray’s music starts rolling as he again forces his way to a standing position. His face grimacing with pain as he raises the belt above his head and walks out of the arena.




Standing before the camera in the cramped and dark backstage of LLP is none other than one-half of the Tag Team Champions, Alexander Conway.  Looking cool and collected despite the attack on Allister last week and the subsequent match, Alexander waves the camera closer.  When the cameraman approaches, Alexander begins to speak.

Alexander Conway: “So here we again, in the crevice of a mind.  You see, in the mind, the impossible is possible and fantasy is reality.  For some illogical reason, the people working in this big top think that this is their mind.  They think that they can defy reality.  They think that they can defy destiny.  They think that they can defy what’s right, define what’s wrong, and avoid their prophesied fate.  People like Allister King live in these kinds of delusion, and this delusion leads to very poor decision making.  These poor decisions, that seem logical to the illogical, force conflict with those of us who are not residing in that same delusion.  It is these delusions that led Allister astray.  It is these delusions that have led Allister to an unfortunate destiny of pain and distress.  Allister, like the fool he is, has decided to make himself the bane of my partner.  Allister has decided to be a thorn in the side of the The Morbidly Obese Man, and by association, the thorn in my side as well.  For reasons unknown to me, Allister actually believes himself capable of defeating The Morbidly Obese Man.  Not only that, but Allister believes himself to not only be relevant, but to be a star that shines brighter than either myself or my partner.  Allister actually believes that he can take the Tag Team Championships away from me and my carefully chosen partner.  However, Allister isn’t the only one living a lie.”

Alexander takes a breath as he stares into the camera with an uncaring eye.

Alexander Conway: “Everyone in this god-forsaken place is living a lie.  Chasm, the old man who was only relevant in federations of the past has been trying to re-invoke his status by putting himself in the way of Crusade and in the way of me by virtue of his position in the Lightweight battle royale that will be happening in two weeks.  In fact, any of the nine who actually believes that they can come out with that belt and a win over me, is gravely mistaken.  Only one man can win that lightweight championship, and that man is prophesied to be Alexander Conway.  Raven Connoly, Bob Bobbie, Christy Chase, Camerella Videoh, Dylan Thompson, Jolene, Johnny Fortune…none of you will do what you think yourself capable of, none of you will jumpstart your careers with a win in this battle royale.  None of you will be able to do as you promise yourself, none of you will be able to do as you dream, for only defeat lies in your future.  But you, Crusade, you are the one who is living the biggest lie.  You are the one who thinks himself capable of leading a revolution.  You are the one who believes himself able to bring in a new age in professional wrestling.  You are the preacher who spills out lies, false promises, and falsities at every opportunity.  Your lies cloud our mind and fill it with a corruptive poison that leave you in a mire so deep and menacing that you will never escape.  You will not come out of this battle royale the new LLP Lightweight champion, you will never win the LLP Tag Team Championships, you will never win the LLP World Championship, and you will never justify the lies you speak or the church of falsities you have created.  You shall simply fall ever deeper into the abyss of obscurity that your twisted mind has already created.”

With an almost listless look on his face, Alexander says these words.  The near monotone words flow from his mouth as if they were merely some fact to be recited at a whim.

Alexander Conway: “But the biggest lies of all flow around Ray Kamaura and the LLP World Championship.  The so-called champion of the world has won a title not by being the most skilled, but simply by knocking off a false idol.  The large man now believes not only that he deserves to be champion, but that he actually earned that title.  What you don’t understand, Ray Kamaura, is that you have earned nothing and won nothing.  You haven’t beaten anyone just yet, and I doubt that you ever will.  Your fate is of the Mayfly’s, only living for a short time to suffice one goal before falling out of life’s grace completely.  Your only goal was to remove the false idol, fate dictates that you shall soon be removed yourself.  Of course, in your perverted mind, you believe that you have what it takes to hold that title.  You believe that you can actually manage to maintain your position and defeat the challenges that lie ahead.  You will have no such luck.  Reality is coming, and not just to you, but to all the wresters in Lucha Libre Puroresu.  Since you have all failed to remove yourselves from your minds, you shall soon have to be ripped from your dreams.  The prophesied days are drawing ever closer.”

The monotonous and breathy speech is somewhat eerie in the darkness of the backstage, but the words cease as Alexander walks away to find his tag team partner.


Seconds tick and The Morbidly Obese Man walks into view...

THUMP!!!  THUMP!!!  THUMP!!!

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "I could have sworn I heard Conway talking over here..."

He then turns and notices the camera.

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Is this thing on?  Oh it is?  Well might as well say a few things..."

The big man clears his throat...

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Since my partner is not here, I guess I should say a few words to our opponents tonight...  Tonight, Excellence, Inc. shall be facing Allister King and Ray Kamaura...  These two hooligans think that they have what it takes to strip this off of me and Conway."

The Morbidly Obese Man gestures to the belt draped over his shoulders.

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Such delusions coming from a team that consists of two men who haven't even cooperated in a match before this night.  You think your makeshift impromptu tag team can take the LLP Tag Team Titles away from Excellence, Inc.?  Think again...  When this night is over, we'll show everyone who is the superior champions as we retain these titles and beat not only Allister King but the LLP World Champion."

Just then an intern runs in and whispers into The Morbidly Obese Man's ears.

The Morbidly Obese Man:  "Oh Conway is looking for me?  Thanks kiddo."

With that the big wrestler turns around and walks away as the screen fades...

THUMP!!!  THUMP!!!  THUMP!!!




LUCHA LIBRE PURORESU TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH

VS

Excellence, Inc. VS Allister King & Ray Kamaura

Jim Jackson:  "And now we have the main event...  Excellence, Inc. shall be defending their titles tonight against the team of Allister King and the LLP World Champion Ray Kamaura."

Mick Mooney:  "That's right Jimbo, this will be totally awesome!  I mean DUUUDE!!!  Ray Kamaura has a chance to be a double champion here tonight!"

Jasmine Lee:  "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a tag team match scheduled for one fall and is for the LLP Tag Team Championship!  Introducing first they are the current and reigning LLP Tag Team Champions, weighing in with a combined weight of over 804 pounds, the team of Alexander Conway and The Morbidly Obese Man...  EXCELLENCE, INC.!"

"Junkies for Fame" by Shinedown blasts over the arena as Alexander Conway steps out from the backstage of LLP. He stops on the aisle and holds a fist into the air as a series of pyrotechnics explode behind him. Once they subside, Conway pulls his vest off and tosses it onto the ground as he walks to the ring.

THUMP!!! THUMP!!! THUMP!!!

"Weird Al" Yankovic's "Eat It" starts blasting from from the speakers and the earth reverberated and shook as the monstrosity known as The Morbidly Obese Man stepped out from behind the curtains and makes his way into the ring.

Jasmine Lee:  "And their opponents for the evening, the challengers weighing in with a combined weight of 585 pounds, the team of ALLISTER KING and the current and reigning LLP World Champion, RAY KAMAURA!"

The lights in the arena go dim, Suddenly Blind Guardian's "A Voice in the Dark" begins to blast throughout the arena and Green, Red and Blue lighting shine in rhythm to music. Smoke begins to cover the ramp. Allister King makes his way out to the entrance stage wearing a black velvet blindfold. He stands on the ramp and looks out to the crowd. As Allister shouts, pyro goes off at the top of the stage to resemble the breathe of dragons. He begins to slap the hands of all the fans at ringside before rolling into the ring. He climbs to the top turnbuckle, removes the blindfold and poses once more before getting down of the turnbuckle and leans against it.

"Sound Of Madness" by Shinedown starts to play as Ray Kamaura begins striding towards the ring. His seven foot frame towers over everything until he comes to the apron. Ray grabs the top rope and steps onto the ring then over the ropes into the ring. He swiftly moves to a turnbuckle and climbs it raises on arm into the air.


Jasmine Lee:  "The referee for this match is Jack B. Quick.  LET THE ACTION BEGIN!"

"Shinigami" by Machinae Supremacy echoes into the big top.  Blue lasers flash as Yuki Monotomo walks down the ramp followed by Camerella Videoh, who looks very uncomfortable. Yuki brings a microphone up to his mask and acts as if he's been hurt by this.

Yuki Monotomo: "You guys decided to have a party without me?  That's just not right!  Even Cam came and I didn't drag her out here."

Camerella tries to say something, but it is lost under the roar of the crowd.  Only the words "pushed me" can be heard.  Yuki continues his rant.

Yuki Monotomo:  "Well as luck would have it, I love parties so I heard about this already!  I would've brought cake, but I was afraid TMOM would devour it before any of us got the chance to have some.  I'm afraid my dashing presence will just have to do, but come on!  This is a party, right!?"

Yuki walks into the ring, followed by Camerella.  He motions her to do the same as him while he puts a party hat on the top of Conway's head.  Videoh goes to do the same and once she accomplishes her task on King's head, runs back to Monotomo.

Yuki Monotomo: "What a fitting crown for our King!  However, even if this is a royal party, I must be here.  Well it's no royal wedding, but a royal party will just have to do!  So, we all brought dates, I see.  Conway, I think your date looks the loveliest, just needs a bit of blush and some lipstick and you'll have to use a barbed wire baseball bat to keep the other guys away from that gem.  Allister, I can't judge you on taste, because yours is definitely not mine.  Cam, you really should've worn a ball gown, I feel outclassed."

Yuki turns to the referee and steps back in faked surprise.

Yuki Monotomo: "OH!  THIS IS A MATCH!  Well as long as I'm here!"

Mick Mooney:  "DUDE!  That Yuki Monotomo dude just cut the line!  Tonight's match was like for King and Kamaura and the next in line for the title after tonight's match challenging the winners of this match should be The Church."

Jim Jackson:  "Well there seems to be confusion now inside the ring.  Maybe Yuki Monotomo is inebriated...  I mean... What the?!"

Mick Mooney:  "IT'S THE CHURCH!  Crusade, Shadow Callahan and The DDTKID just pulled that Monotomo dude out of the ring.  Ooh!  They just threw Monotomo into the steel steps!  I guess they aren't happy someone wanted to cut in..."

Jim Jackson:  "Security has come in to clear Yuki Monotomo and The Church away before further damage can be done.  Camerella Videoh silent follows after Monotomo who is being assisted by security after that vicious assault."

Mick Mooney:  "Which he had coming dude...  Well now we can get on with the match."

Jim Jackson:  "Yes, that's true Mick and there's the bell!  Looks like it's Allister King and The Morbidly Obese Man kicking things off for their respective teams.  King throws a few ineffective punches at TMOM who shrugs it off and counters with a headbutt.  King staggers into the corner... TMOM charges in but King dodges and TMOM crashes into the corner..."

Mick Mooney:  "Whoa!  That fat dude almost knocked the ring posts off!  If King got caught in that, we'll be serving some Allister King pancakes."

Jim Jackson:  "Allister King charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward.  Body slam by The Morbidly Obese Man and he goes for the cover!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "Close call dude to be able to still move under all that weight...  King must have like super strong shoulders man.  Tag to Alexander Conway."

Jim Jackson:  "Excellence Inc. whip Allister King into the ropes and hit a double back elbow.  Alexander Conway covers but King gets a foot on the bottom rope.  Implant DDT by Conway!  King staggers back up to his feet and is quickly sent to the ropes with an Irish whip.  King counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Conway walks into a side slam."

Mick Mooney:  "Dude, think about how much talent it takes to side slam someone. Kevin Nash can do it.  Oh!  King goes for the cover..."

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Jim Jackson:  "Tag between Allister King and Ray Kamaura. Kamaura gets a stalling fallaway slam on Alexander Conway.  Conway tries to get up but a huge haymaker knocks him right back down again.  Kamaura with a legdrop...  It nearly cleaves Conway in half!  Kamaura for the cover!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two..."

Mick Mooney:  "Dude!  Conway like keeps the flame alive for their team, but it looks like Kamaura is not done with him yet..."

Jim Jackson:  "Fallaway slam by Ray Kamaura puts down Alexander Conway.  Kamaura goes for a headlock but Conway somehow slips free.  Conway uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Conway tags out to The Morbidly Obese Man.  Looks like the two biggest men in the roster will start duking it out now."

Mick Mooney:  "Awesome!  It's a slugfest!  That fat dude and that big dude are trading punches!  Whoa!  It looks like the World Champion is getting like the short end of the stick here..."

Jim Jackson:  "The Morbidly Obese Man connects with rights and lefts and Ray Kamaura is down!  TMOM goes for an elbow drop but Kamaura rolls away!  Tag between Ray Kamaura and Allister King.  TMOM slams Allister King down and motions to the crowd.  I think he must be going for the finish here...  Wait!  Kamaura enters the ring to save his partner...  Alexander Conway also enters the ring!  Conway taken down with a massive clothesline by Kamaura!  King recovers!  TMOM is distracted by the chaos and gets caught by Kamaura who holds him in place...  King is going for a super kick..."

Mick Mooney:  "HOLY CRAP!  The fat dude somehow broke free and dodges!  King just hit Kamaura with the super kick!  Big chop by the fat dude knocks King down!"

Jim Jackson:  "Alexander Conway quickly locks their opponent in a Boston crab.  The Morbidly Obese Man leaps up in the air and brings his leg down on the nape of their opponent's neck executing the Excellence of Execution!  TMOM goes for the cover!"

Mick Mooney:  "I'm calling this match dude!"

Jack B. Quick:  "One!  Two!  Three!"

Jasmine Lee:  "Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match and STILL LLP Tag Team Champions, the team of Alexander Conway and The Morbidly Obese Man...  EXCELLENCE, INC.!"

Jim Jackson:  "Well looks like Excellence, Inc. retains the titles tonight due to a botched super kick attempt by Allister King.  Looks like Ray Kamaura is not happy with the outcome...  He's in the ring arguing with King...  Kamaura just decked King!  Ray Kamaura kicks Allister King in the gut causing Allister King to double over, puts his right shoulder to the back of Allister King's Neck, grabs the back of their legs and quickly lifts them up. Ray holds the pose for a few seconds and then falls onto his butt, crushing Allister King's neck on his shoulder."

Mick Mooney:  "IT'S THE END GAME!!!  KAMAURA JUST LAID KING OUT WITH HIS FINISHER!  I guess Kamaura doesn't appreciate losing and being kicked on the face too.  I mean I would be like pissed too if I already offered my assistance and all I got is a kick to the face..."




Jim Jackson:  "What a night...  I'm speechless at the developments...  The tag team scene here is starting to heat up and we may have a new feud brewing between our LLP World Champion Ray Kamaura and Allister King"

Mick Mooney:  "Well things will still get more interesting in 2 weeks Jimbo, remember we have a 10 man battle royale for the new LLP Lightweight Title!"

Jim Jackson:  "That's right, we already had a great show this week but in 2 weeks, we may even top this week.  Banzai Ultimo just gets better and better.  Unfortunately we are out of time so until next time...  Good night and good fight!"


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United League of Lunatics & Lucha Libre Puroresu :: Shows :: LLP Shows-
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