Ay Basura! 02/27/2011

Subject: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:06 am

The Masked Man is shown in his locker room getting ready for his match against shadow. Stephanie Dawson comes up to interview him

Stephanie Dawson: "Masked Man, what are your thoughts on your opponent Ahadow?

The Masked Man: "Unlike all the other losers I've faced in ULOL, I don't mind this guy. He does whatever it takes to win a match. Kinda like me! But Shadow is gonna find out why I'm going to be a future champion right here in ULOL. In other words, IM GOING TO KICK HIS ASS!"

The Masked Man walks out of his locker room and to his match.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first Shadow!"

"Massacre" plays as Shadow walks down the ramp not paying attend to the crowd. He gets in the ring and waits for his opponent.

Jim Jackson: "Shadow makes his way to the ring, this should be an excellent match to get us warmed up for tonight's PPV, Ay Basura!."

Brad Blood: "This PPV is going to be awesome, I can not wait!"

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for tonight, The Masked Man!"

'My Apocalypse' by Arch Enemy starts playing around the arena as The Masked Man makes his way down to the ring.

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for tonight is Don Q. Hotte. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell, and we are off. Shadow gets slammed to the mat hard by The Masked Man, but quickly gets back to his feet."

Brad Blood: "The Masked Man fires off some right and left hands. Back elbow connects, Shadow staggers backward. The Masked Man is firing on all cylanders tonight."

Jim Jackson: "Indeed he is, Shadow seems surprised. Fall-away slam by The Masked Man. Masked Man going for a sleeper but Shadow counters by turning it into a jaw breaker."

Brad Blood: "Why does he wear a damn mask anyway, I assume he is ugly as hell under that thing, why else would you wear something so ridiculous?"

Jim Jackson: "If ugly was a reason to wear a mask, then you should be wearing two Brad."

Brad Blood: "WOW, that cut deep Jim, that cut deep."

Jim Jackson: "Flying shoulder tackle by Shadow sends Masked to the mat. Looks like Shadow is taking control. Big piledriver on Masked and Shadow goes for a cover!"

Don Q. Hotte: "1....2..."

Brad Blood: "The Masked Man kicks out. The Masked Man hits a right hand out of nowhere, followed by a massive backbreaker, Shadow got planted. Masked Man hooks the leg!"

Don Q Hotte: "1....2...."

Brad Blood: "Shadow gets a shoulder up, he staggers to his feet. Spear! Masked Man just folded Shadow in half! Shadow is down and hurt. Masked Man hooks the leg again!"

Don Q. Hotte: "1....2...."

Jim Jackson: "Somehow Shadow gets a shoulder up! That was close. Shadow pulls a mule kick out of nowhere, and follows it up with a headbutt. Shadow goes for a big leg drop but Masked Man rolls out of the way."

Brad Blood: "I'm sure that hurt! Big clothesline on Shadow. Shadow moves fast though and whips The Masked Man into the corner."

Jim Jackson: "Shadow charges in, but into a pair of raised boots. Shadow is out of it! Masked Man see's his chance. Masked Man lifts Shadowonto his shoulders and slams him to the ground, Huntmaster Powerbomb!!"

Brad Blood: "Masked uses a roll up, with feet on the second rope! The referee hasn't seen it."

Don Q. Hotte: "1....2....3!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match, The Masked Man!!"

Jim Jackson: "The Masked Man slides out of the ring to the floor, then turns and leaves through the crowd. He's happy to have the win, and evidently isn't going to hang around for Shadow to get some payback."

Brad Blood: "Payback for what!? He won fair and square, if the ref doesn't see it, then it's not cheating."

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Jim Jackson: "Good evening folks welcome to Ay Basura! ULOL's PPV! And tonight we have a great show lined up for you all!"

Brad Blood: "That's right, we have title matches where Lucian Blackheart defends his Ligero Maximo title against The British Hawk. Shogun's Primo Ultimo title will be on the line as he takes on Alexander Conway and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson, but what everyone is really anticipating is the four versus four, tag team elimination match between Team Eunice and Team Marcus!"

Jim Jackson: "That's right, tonight, the fate of ULOL shall be determined in a four against four elimination tag match! Shall Marcus Troy finally have free reign or will Eunice Winslow thwart his ambition? Let us not keep everyone waiting, LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The ULOL Tron comes to life and we see the image of Mrs. Eunice P. Winslow, the vice-general manager of ULOL.

Eunice P. Winslow: "Greetings and good evening everyone. As you all well know, tonight is a critical night for ULOL. After tonight we shall see if the tyrant Marcus Troy shall be dethroned or not. I hope you all support my team tonight and cheer for them for the sake of ULOL, for the sake of the wrestling business and for your own sakes as well. Tonight it's either the end of Marcus Troy or the end of my tenure here in ULOL. Let us hope for the former. Thank you all."

The ULOL Tron blinks off as the VGM's message ends, leaving the fans praying for the success of Team Eunice.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The camera turns on as Stank Lord walks into Marcus is office, who is at his desk, Stank Lord starts speaking.

Stank Lord: "Hello sir, I have come here to talk to you about tonight. I thinking that I want to help you in this war against Eunice I want to see you beat her and go back to where she came from, so with that I will be available to help you out to win the match against Eunice's team, now all I'm asking in return is that you can help me out in my match against a fat judo person and make it into more of my advantage, so what do you say? I scratch your back you scratch mine?"

Stank Lord waits for an answer.

Marcus Troy stares at the walking biological hazard standing in his office. He quickly puts out his cigar in fear of igniting any fumes that is emanating from Stank Lord.

Marcus Troy: "Help me? You have been out of action for a time Stank Lord. So far you have still got to prove yourself again in the ring before you can be of use to me, perhaps if you win the match you are scheduled to fight in for tonight, I will consider it. Now if there's nothing else, I believe you have a match to win. There's the door, I believe you can let yourself out."

Marcus Troy points at the door and Stank Lord leaves as the scene fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:06 am

VS

Jim Jackson: "Welcome to the first match of the evening. Tonight we have a match between the returning Stank Lord and newcomer Musashi Kuruma. Both men coming off from a win in their respective fights. Who will win this match up tonight?"

Brad Blood: "Great we have two fat men in the ring. One is a stinkin' Jap while the other one is just plain stinky."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Musashi Kuruma!"

This time around, Musashi actually managed to remember the correct date and time of his match. In fact, he shows up a little early, just to make a little speech to the crowd of people in the stadium. Mic in hand, he stands in the center of the ring and strikes what he believes to be a heroic pose.

Musashi Kuruma: "Good people of...uh...this place right here! As you may know, I am Musashi Kuruma, a recent addition to this fed's roster. What you don't know, however, is that I was raised by monkeys! There is nothing that Stank Lord can throw at me that I haven't already smelled, rolled in, or at some point might've mistaken for a chocolate cake! This match will not end well for him, and maybe not very well for me either, but it'll be worse for him because I! Have! FATTO POWAH!"

A few people cheer, but most just scratch their heads, trying to figure out what in god's name the guy in the ring is talking about. Is he just making stuff up on the spot?

Musashi Kuruma: "So as soon as he steps through those curtains and enters this ring, I will show him the true power of a fat Buddhist priest raised by primates! With judo! And maybe a bit of my own gaseous brew, if it comes to that. Can you smeeeeeeeeell what Musashi is cooking?"

At this point, everyone in the stands just gives up and waits for the match to start. Someone holds up a sign that says, "YOU MUST OBTAIN ADDITIONAL OVERNESS". Musashi nods, sighs, and goes to his corner.

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for tonight, Stank Lord!"

"This Stinks" plays as Stank Lord appears on stage he looks around him then walks down the ramp and into the ring, he poses for the fans as he waits for his opponent.

Jim Jackson: "Well these two seems like they are ready to go at each other."

Brad Blood: "I know we want to start off big but this is just ridiculous."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble! LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!""

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell! Kuruma charges in and locks up Stank Lord in a clinch! Both men trying to battle for the upperhand..."

Brad Blood: "I'm surprised he can stand Stank Lord's body odor."

Jim Jackson: "Belly to belly suplex by Kuruma. Stank Lord quickly gets up but walks into a stiff lariat clothesline from Kuruma. Vertical suplex by Musashi Kuruma again sends Stank Lord crashing to the mat. Musashi Kuruma snap suplexes Stank. Stank Lord shakes it off!"

Brad Blood: "For a fat guy, Kuruma can be pretty agile. Kuruma goes for SStank Lord's arm... Stank reverses a Musashi Kuruma hammerlock now it's Kuruma with his arm pinned behind his back!"

Jim Jackson: "Kuruma gets caught with a short powerbomb from Stank. Brainbuster suplex by Stank Lord. Stank Lord hooks the leg... Kuruma kicks out before the ref can count! The match continues. Delayed brainbuster suplex by Stank Lord... He quickly hooks the leg again."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kuruma kicks out! Stank charges in towards Kuruma... Stank Lord goes flying to the air via a uranage by Musashi Kuruma! Oh he landed hard! Stank Lord quickly gets up just as Kuruma charges in for the legs."

Jim Jackson: "Good sprawl by Stank Lord! German suplex by Stank Lord sneds Kuruma to the mat Stank Lord goes up to the top turnbuckle... He leaps... Stank only gets knees on a splash. Stank walks into a jaw breaker by Kuruma. Kuruma hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Stank Lord gets out of it at two! Kuruma quickly grounds Stank with a headlock! Stank powers out of a headlock and rolls back to his feet!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord strikes Kuruma with a couple of hard elbows. Irish whip sends Kuruma to the ropes... Back body drop! Kuruma slips out the back of a Stank Lord bodyslam. Hard impact Russian legsweep by Kuruma. Stank Lord is in trouble."

Brad Blood: "Looks like Kuruma is going for his finisher!"

Jim Jackson: "Here it comes, Musashi Kuruma picks his opponent up over his head, spins in place, and tosses them onto the mat executing a Daisetsuzan Oroshi! Musashi Kuruma for the pin..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall, Musashi Kuruma!"

Brad Blood: "Musashi Kuruma is still in the ring celebrating. Stank Lord pushes the referee away. Stank Lord drops Kuruma to the canvas. Is he going to do what I think he is?"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord picks up Musashi Kuruma but Musashi Kuruma kicks Stank Lord in the mid-section. Then Musashi Kuruma runs to the ropes and then to Lord. But Lord lifts up xxxx and throws him on the rope. Then Stank Lord kicks Musashi Kuruma in the back causing him to bent. Then Stank Lord puts Musashi Kuruma under his armpit and holding him there. Musashi Kuruma is struggling to breath cause of the bad smell of the pits. Musashi Kuruma passes out to The Pit Sleeper. Talk about being a sore loser."

Brad Blood: "True but he's the one walking out of the ring and not Kuruma."

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

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Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

"Life is Beautiful" by Sixx AM blares throughout the arena and when the lyrics start to play Ray Kamaura makes his way to the ring very slowly.

Ray Kamaura: "Tonight, The DWMA fight some drunken bums. But they are so lucky drunken bums. NO MERCY! Not only do I plan on destroying Alister, but I'm gonna beat him so bad he will never be able to cash in his golden ticket."

Ray walks around the ring looking into the heart of all the fans. He contiues on with is rant.

Ray Kamaura: "I never thought for one second that I would be here, in the tag team circuit. Sure I have experience, and me and Leon were a team before, but I came to the ULOL to become the Primo Ultimo Champion. But that will have to wait."

Ray pauses and waits for Leon to enter the Arena.

"The Song of Storms ~ Metal" by Artificial Fear begins its broadcast from the stereo system in the arena. Leon Hinomoto tosses his hat out into the crowd once he gets to the end of the walkway.

Leon Hinomoto: :This may seem strange, but every time I hear about the golden ticket, I think of Willy and his Wonka factory. Wait, that's not right. Disregard that."

Those words are said without any microphone, so only Ray hears them.

Leon Hinomoto: "People of the crowd, what Ray says is the truth. Though I too had not originally planned to be on a team with my greatest rival, after his embarassing loss in the Royal Rumble I couldn't just let him be a laughing stock. We will be sure to always win our tag matches, or at least give you all the show of your lives. Ray and The Rainman today will make it pour!"

Leon's hugely zealous speech causes the crowd to roar.

Ray laughs at Leon's remarks.

Ray Kamaura: "You are a funny man Leon. But you speak some truth about us. Tonight it's Game Over for the IRA. I mean come on! They are drunken morons. I think we can take them. But hey you can never tell. I have been wrong before."

"Correded Dreams" by Ride the Sky starts to play at the conclusion of Ray and Leon's chat.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The Camera fades from black to the show the barroom heroes of the IRA, Allister and Scott, sitting around a table with a full case of beer and 2 empty cases.

Allister King: "Here Scott, did I forget anything important?"

Scott Logan: "I'm not sure, is it that ticket thing?"

Allister King: "Nah, its not that cause that's not important."

Scott Logan: "Not sure, did ya remember the cigarettes and cards?"

Allister pulls out a deck of cards and a carton of cigarettes

Allister King: "Nope that's not it cause I remembered them."

Scott Logan: "Did ya pay for them?"

Allister King: "Nah I think that was what I forgot. Anyway up for a game of poker?"

Scott Logan: "Sure, deal the cards bitch."

Allister drinks from a beer as he begins to shuffle the deck

Scott Logan: "I'm taking one of these."

Scott opens one of the packs of cigarettes and lights a cigarette as Allister deals the cards

Allister King: "Got any 3s?"

Scott Logan: "We are playing poker Allister not go fish..... Any jacks?"

Allister King: "Nope go feck yourself!"

A beautiful red headed woman walks up behind Allister looking angry.

Scott Logan: "Hey Sammie, How ya been?"

Allister King: "Sammie?"

Allister turns around and looks at the woman.

Allister King: "SAMMIE!!"

Allister dives off his chair knocking the table over and tries to crawl away.

Samantha Collins: "I've been looking for ya, Allister."

Allister: I'm sorry Sammie i didn't mean to do it. I don't know what happened

Samantha Collins: "Ya don't know what happened ya left 6 years ago saying you were away for a few pints and ya never came back."

Allister King: "To be fair I've been constantly drinking and forgot."

Samantha Collins: "Forgot about your wife did ya?"

Samantha smashes a bottle and threatens allister with it. Allister begins to cry.

Allister King: "I'm sorry I will change."

Samantha Collins: "No you won't, Ya've been a feckin' alco since you were 13. Your never gonna change."

Allister King: "I'll make it up to ya somehow."

Samantha Collins: "How ya gonna do that?"

Allister King: "I'll try to get the GM to hire ya.".

Scott slowly walks away

Samantha Collins: "That might work."

Samantha throws the bottle which completely smashes over Scott's head

Samantha Collins: "Where the feck are you going? You knew where this bastard was and you didn't think to call me?"

Scott Logan: "Truthfully I didn't have the money to make a long distant call like that."

Samantha backhands Scott across the face and continues till he cries. Allister uses this opportunity to try to get away but Samantha spots him

Samantha Collins: "Where are you going?"

Allister King: "Sammie no stop it please."

Samantha kicks Allister in the genial area

Allister King: "WAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

Samantha grabs Scott and Allister and pulls them till they can stand.

Samantha Collins: "You two are coming with me."

Samantha drags Allister and Scott away, kicking and screaming as the camera fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The staff at the bar called Caritas II are busy serving a large number of customers. Payday has arrived, and the patrons have come to wine and dine. Many of the customers are watching a basketball game on the TVs set up around the bar, Lakers versus Clippers.

Patron: "Kobe's going back to the locker room. That don't look good."

Another Patron: "His finger's permanently hurtin'. Wouldn't be surprised if he fights through the pain and comes back, even if the doctors tell him not to. Hey Lorne, another beer!"

The bartender obliges, as the game goes into a timeout. The patrons and staff at Caritas II don't notice the commercial that begins to play.

A voice is heard on the blank screen, as the advert begins. Folks who follow the ULOL would recognize the voices belong to the most hated men in the company.

Marcus Troy: "You people and Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing have pissed me off for the last time. I gave you all a chance to peacefully retreat but you threw bricks at my direction. This time you people and your “hero” will learn a VERY, VERY serious lesson here today."

Shogun: "I will show that NO ONE stands a chance against the might of the Demonic God! Soon each and every one of you will BOW at my feet or you will be sacrificed!"

Marcus Troy: "ZOMBIE!!!! MAKE!! THEM!!! SUFFER!!!!

The words from Shogun and Marcus Troy boom as we see their Zombie partner murdering defenseless fans.

Jim Jackson: "Oh my god!! Zombie is tearing through the people trapped in there like paper!! People are trying to escape but they’re hitting the wall of shields!! THIS IS INHUMANE!!!"

Shogun: "I am not a man but a monster."

Brad Blood: "Zombie now just feasting on a woman’s body. Now he’s moving on, after more people! He’s seen a little girl just standing there!! Frozen in horror!!"

Zombie: "And for my free for all buffet the other night? I bite into people, as like every other living thing, I need food to keep strength! I have an undying hunger for flesh! I can smell all of these people's blood and I can ALWAYS smell my food.

Shogun: "I will spearhead a new era in the history of wrestling.The era of the Demonic God!"

Jim Jackson: "This is … is … is … terrible!! It’s disgusting!!! It’s sick!! Letting loose a hungry monster amongst trapped defenseless people! The cries of the dying are unexplainable!! This … this is … I don’t know what it is anymore … I’m … I’m... absolutely speechless!!

Zombie: "You say that what I did to you is awakening a beast? A beast that is .... hungry? A beast that ... FEEDS .. on inflicting pain? Is it me or does that sound sim... no wait ... that is me! I AM that beast! ALL the time!"

Shogun: "There is more going on than any of you could possibly know! I hold the strings to the puppets in this little show of mine and I plan on truly revealing what this show is very very soon. Now excuse me I am late to a slaughter."

The bloodchilling video of the slaughter of men, women and children that has left bloodstains all over the ULOL red fades out, amidst various images of the most hated men in the ULOL.

Marcus Troy smugly lighting his cigar.

Shogun with his hand raised in victory.

Zombie licking his lips, a string of brain dangling between his teeth.

Then the film goes in another direction.

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall, Zombie!"

Brad Blood: "Wait! Zombie is not done with Gilden yet! He grabs Gilden by the throat. Looks like he's aiming for the jugular as he licks his lips! This is awesome!"

Jim Jackson: "Wait! Someone just scampered out from below the ring! IT'S QUIOAECAOPEDIDWAZHAPZHING! The crowd goes ecstatic! Wait, he has the missing ULOL Ligero Maximo title in his hands. Q leaps unto the apron and then leaps unto the ropes. HE SPRINGBOARDS OFF THE ROPES WITH THE BELT SMASHING THE LIGERO MAXIMO BELT INTO ZOMBIE'S HEAD!"

Brad Blood: "Wait what's Q doing?! Q is stripping Zombie's pant's off! AGH! Now that's nasty! What the? Q is holding the Ligero Maximo title up high... AND HE SHOVES THE LIGERO MAXIMO TITLE DOWN INTO ZOMBIE'S DARKNESS! EEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Q returns the Ligero Maximo title to ULOL but at the same time leaves a message to Marcus Troy... Security has entered to ringside but Q is already gone making his exit through the crowd as they cheer loudly for him."

Then the advert plays another fight.

Brad Blood: "The match over, but Zombie wants payback! And he's gonna get a bite outta Q one way or the other!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie lunges and Q ducks! LIFTS Zombie over him for a flapjack!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie just crashed on top of the ringpost! He's...Jim, he's been IMPALED onto the ringpost!"

Jim Jackson: "He's just squirming right where he landed! The force of impact strong enough to run him through the post! Q is bailing out of the ring!"

Brad Blood: "He's got his title belt! He's gonna go after Zombie while he's stuck on that ring post!"

Jim Jackson: "Q is...ripping the mask of his Correa Grande del Oro de
Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing. Wait, that's an ULOL belt under that mask!"

Brad Blood: "It's the Primo Ultimo belt! How'd he get that! HE'S GONNA"

Jim Jackson: "HE JUST SHOVED THE PRIMO ULTIMO TITLE BELT UP ZOMBIE'S BACKSIDE! HE JUST PLUNGED THE PRIMO ULTIMO BELT UP ZOMBIE'S REAR END!"

Brad Blood: "And here come Marcus Troy's cavalry!"

Jim Jackson: "IT'S THE AGE OF PAIN! QUIOAECAOPEDIDWAZHAPZHING TAKES A BOW, AND OFF HE GOES TO RUN THE 4-MINUTE MILE, LEAVING THE ULOL TITLE INSIDE A DANGLING ZOMBIE!"

Brad Blood: "Q stops by a fan, and he's grabbing a belt! It's another masked belt! I think that's the legit Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"

Jim Jackson: "He's raising the belt over his head, dissing the Age of Pain and Zombie!

The fight clip ends. Words fade onto the empty screen:

Your murders and genocide will not destroy us!

We will never forget the atrocities you committed!

May our loved ones give you permanent indigestion!

May you suffer the providence of divine justice and sodomy, when you fall face first in the rubbish of Ay Basura! And hopefully get dumped in an incinerator!

"A message from the Friends and Supporters of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing" flashes in the credits as the commercial ends.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:07 am

&

VS

&

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a tag match scheduled for one fall! The team that wins this match will become the number 1 contender for the ULOL Campeónes Compañero Titles! Introducing first, Allister King and Scott Logan, the Irish Republican Alcoholics!"

''The Blood Of Cuchulainn'' begins to blast from the PA system as Allister King and Scott Logan walk out onto the entrance ramp wearing trench coats and sunglasses. They both light a cigarette and continue to walk down to the ring. They stop on the way down to have a quick pint with some of the fans. They both stomp out their cigarettes and enter the ring. As they stand side by side in the middle of the ring with their heads down, they reach in their pockets and take out bottles of whiskey. They open them, hold them up to the crowd and drinks about half the bottle. They remove their coats and sunglasses and stagger over to their corner.

Jim Jackson: "Shocking, they are already drunk."

Brad Blood: "OH man, I LOVE these guys."

Jasmine Lee: "And their opponents for tonight, the team of Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura, The DWMA!"

Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura make their way to the ring.

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for tonight is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell, we have two great teams here, lets see who comes out on top. King and Hinomoto starting us off. King hits a right hand. Flying shoulder tackle by King sends Hinomoto to the mat."

Brad Blood: "Allister King goes for the pin, or tripped, either way its a early cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2.."

Jim Jackson: "Leon kicks out and the match continues. King stumbles backwards and tags in Scott Logan. I. R. A. whip Hinomoto into the ropes and hit a double clothesline."

Brad Blood: "King hooks the leg, even though he is not the legal man!"

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2...."

Jim Jackson: "Not sure why the ref even counted that, but Hinomoto gets a shoulder up either way. King stumbles over to his corner, aaaaand promptly falls off the apron onto the arena floor, and now he is laughing hysterically."

Brad Blood: "AHAHAHAH, Thats great. Back to the ring, a Driven DDT by Scott Logan. Leon Hinamoto blocks a right hand and fires back."

Jim Jackson: "Logan takes a hurrancarana. Cover by Hinomoto!"

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2.."

Brad Blood: "No luck. The match continues. Tag to Ray Kamaura. Big clothesline from Kamaura, and another pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2...."

Jim Jackson: "EWWWWWWW, Logan just threw up, causing Ray to break the pin before the three count, that was disgusting."

Brad Blood: "Was it Jim, or was it brilliant strategy on Logan's part?!"

Jim Jackson: "No, it wasn't, Logan is just drunk! Bodyslam by Kamaura, he is not happy now. Ray Kamaura misses a clothesline. Flying elbow from Scott Logan."

Brad Blood: "Tag to Allister King, who luckily managed to climb back onto the apron. King hits a right hand. Ray stumbles back to his corner, tag between Ray Kamaura and Leon Hinamoto. Big clothesline on Hinomoto. King lifts Leon Hinomoto up on his shoulders, Leon Hinomoto grabs the top rope and slips down! He leaps and tags in his partner!"

Jim Jackson: " That is what you have to do, fast tags. Kamaura receives some punishment. Bodyslam by King, followed by a cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2..."

Brad Blood: "Kick out, a tag to Scott Logan. I. R. A. whip Kamaura into the corner. Allister King whips Scott Logan in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Hooks the leg!

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2...."

Jim Jackson: "Ray gets a shoulder up. Flying elbow from Scott Logan. Ray Kamaura avoids an avalanche, Scott Logan hits the turnbuckles hard. Kamaura follows with a stump piledriver on Scott Logan. Cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2..."

Brad Blood: "Logan kicks out. Tag to Leon Hinamoto. Second rope splash by Hinomoto. Going for the pin again."

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2...."

Jim Jackson: "Scott kicks out! A split-second away from a three. Hinomoto hits a dropkick on Scott Logan. Scott Logan blocks a right hand and fires back. Logan uses a basement dropkick to the knee. Logan tags out to Allister King."

Brad Blood: "Allister King fires off some right and left hands, but he is facing the wrong way, he is just punching air."

Jim Jackson: "Must be more of that brilliant strategy. Hinomoto tags out to Ray Kamaura, as Logan stumbles in and turns King around, Nimble chases Logan back out of the ring. Rude Awakening on Ray Kamaura by King."

Brad Blood: "Ray Kamaura slugs Allister King, sending him down into the corner. While Kamaura fires up the crowd, King is removing the turnbuckle pad! This is going to be good!!"

Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura comes over...but King goes low! Allister King gets up, then goes for the irish whip into the corner, but Kamaura reverses! Allister King goes head first into them, knocking him silly! Schoolboy from Kamaura!!!"

Jack B. Nimble: "1....2....3!"

Brad Blood: "What..., what just happened!?"

Jim Jackson: "Jack B. Nimble never noticed the exposed turnbuckle. Don Q. Hotte comes running down the aisle, and points out the exposed steel turnbuckle to Jack B. Nimblel. Jack B. Nimble reverses the decision! He is disqualifying Ray Kamaura for using it to gain an advantage! What!? Ray didn't expose that turnbuckle!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match, and number 1 contenders for the ULOL Campeónes Compañero Titles, the team of Allister King and Scott Logan, the Irish Republican Alcoholics!"

Brad Blood: "See Jim, I told you, brilliant strategy. I. R. A. go into the crowd, whiskey in hand, where they celebrate their win.!"

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Scene opens backstage in the interview area. ULOL's resident interviewer, Stephanie Dawson, stands in view smiling brightly. She starts to speak.

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time is the current Ligero Maximo Championship! The British Hawk!"

Roars of cheers are heard as the fans are watching this segment via the titantron. The British Hawk enters the view, wearing his entrance attire.

Stephanie Dawson: "Now Hawk, tonight you'll go one on one with Lucian Blackheart for the Ligero Maximo Championship. This is the 3rd time you'll be challenging for the prestigious championship, despite coming close in the gauntlet match. Do you think that the third time is the charm?"

The British Hawk: "Well yes I did come close in the gauntlet. I thought that after eliminating Little Wang I had a pretty good chance but Nao Fook Mi ran me dry of fatigue and energy. But tonight I think I have a good chance tonight and that third time will be the charm."

Stephanie Dawson: "But Hawk, you know as well as anyone to never underestimate your opponents, especially if your opponent is a champion. Also Lucian Blackheart is a solid competitor who, as we saw on the Lucha Loco show, can also be a bit arrogant."

The British Hawk: "Well I think that the whole, winning the title thing has gone to Lucian's head but who hasn't expected that. Now I don't doubt his abilities as a wrestler because he wouldn't be a champion if he completely sucks. It'll be a hard match to predict but I have a feeling that tonight is my night."

TBH smiles at the camera.

Stephanie Dawson: "Also later on we have the Team Marcus versus Team Eunice. What are your thoughts on that?"

The British Hawk: "Well, one thing for sure is that whoever participates this match will definatley feel the effects of it for a long time in more ways than one. That match will leave a huge crack in the federation."

Stephanie Dawson: "Well thank you Hawk, best of luck tonight."

The British Hawk winks and leaves the view as the scene fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Marcus Troy, the general manager of ULOL waits in the parking lot as a red limo pulls up. Alighting from the limo is none other than the ULOL Primo Ultimo champion Shogun. Marcus drops his cigar and steps on it putting it out and walks over to Shogun.

Marcus Troy: "Shogun, we need to..."

Shogun brushes past the general manager of ULOL totally ignoring him and walks straight into the building.

Marcus Troy: "GOD DAMN IT! DON'T YOU DARE IGNORE ME YOU INGRATE! YOU COME BACK HERE RIGHT NOW! SHOGUN!!! SHOGUN!!!"

The screams of the general manager falls on deaf ears as the ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion continues to ignore his calls as the scene slowly fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Stephanie Dawson and Lucian Blackheart are seen on the ULOL Tron by the interview area.

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm joined here with the current ULOL Ligero Maximo Champion, Lucian Blackheart. Thank you for joining us, Lucian."

Lucian smiles as he showcases his title, as it rests on his shoulder.

Lucian Blackheart: "Yes, yes.. You're lucky I just managed to squeeze you in. Being a champion wrestler is quite time consuming."

Stephanie Dawson: "Lucian, tell us how your feeling going into this big match. Can we get a little sneak peek of what your strategy may be to come out of this one with the belt?"

Stephanie moves the mic towards Lucian for a reply.

Lucian Blackheart: "How am I feeling? Well.. Quite relaxed, a little excited, and not a hint of worry. As for my game plan? Simple. Look at what I did to Nao Fook Mi last weeks ago. Look at what I've been doing since I got back in the ULOL. I'm going to go out there and whoop his ass. But first.. I'm going to have a little fun, play around a little. Then comes the suffering. Once I figured he's had enough, then I'll do even more damage. I'm an entertainer Stephanie.. This is what I do, this is what I am."

Lucian smiles as he begins to hear boos from the crowd.

Stephanie Dawson: "It has come across the minds of many that your audacious, egotistic, and arrogant attitude will be your ultimate downfall, what is your opinion on that?"

Lucian Blackheart: "Those are the things that make me such a great competitor. The strive and the confidence boosts I get from having this sort of attitude is exactly what got me this title in the first place. Being audacious, egotistic and arrogant isn't a weakness, it's a strength."

A devilish smirk appears on Lucian's face.

Stephanie Dawson: "Team Marcus or Team Eunice. Which team will come out victorious?"

Lucian snatches the mic from Stephanie as she draws it closer to him from an answer.

Lucian Blackheart: "I have made it clear before that I am in fact a Marcus Troy supporter. I'm not sure about those Age of Assholes, but you can never really go wrong with Zombie on your side, considering our history I know this from experience."

Lucian extends his arm out handing the mic back to Stephanie, but drops it to the floor as she reaches out to get it. He laughs and takes his exit as the ULOL Tron fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Beyond the gym doors we see two figures doing some last minute sparring, as the camera zooms closer, it is revealed that the two figures are actually those of Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi or better known as Oriental Spices, one of ULOL's premiere tag teams.

In a flurry of punches and kicks, Little Wang is seen on the defensive blocking every strike thrown at his direction by his partner.

Little Wang: "Whoa! We're supposed to be sparring Fook Mi but you're going all out on me."

Little Wang back flips and distances himself from his partner.

Little Wang: "Something bothering you? You seem like you were in a trance back there. I mean I won't complain if you do the same and defeat our opponents later but I can't have you rendering me incapable of fighting before our match later."

Nao Fook Mi stares at her tag partner and best friend for a moment then falls down to a sitting position. Breathing heavily, she grabs a towel and wipes away the sweat beads that accumulated on the forehead.

Nao Fook Mi: "Sorry... I just... It has just been bothering me that we aren't getting good wins anymore. I know master said that losing is part of the pathway to getting stronger but our losses aren't really doing wonders for my morale."

Fook Mi sighs deeply and looks at Little Wang....

Nao Fook Mi: "Specially in my last match, I lost an opportunity to win the Ligero Maximo title from Blackheart. Sure he cheated, but whether he played dirty or not I should still have been able to overcome it and win. I hope we really win the match tonight. I need this win... I WANT THIS WIN!"

Fook Mi slams her fist unto the mat in frustration.

Little Wang walks over and puts his hand on Fook Mi's shoulders.

Little Wang: "Don't forget, you are not alone in this. You have me backing you up in this match, we are teamed with Raven Connoly and The Morbidly Obese Man. You have allies here Fook Mi."

Little Wang stares into Fook Mi's eyes.

Little Wang: "I, of all people understand what you are going through. I went through a lot of crap growing up. How many fights did you think I lost? How many times was I kicked around and picked on because of my size? Yet look at me now. I'm still here, I'm still alive and kicking and I'll keep coming back with such tenacity that even though I lose nine times out of ten, that one win I get will be so great it will negate my nine losses. Now get off your butt and lets finish this sparring session."

With that, Nao Fook Mi's mood seems to have livened up and she hops to her feet. Both wrestlers assume fighting stances and charge at each other with wide grins on their faces as the scene fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:07 am

VS

Jasmine: "The following contest is a Falls Count Anywhere match, and is for the ULOL Ligero Maximo!"

The crowd cheers in response, as the challenger's music begins to play.

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing the challenger! Accompanied to the ring by the Lady Bianca de Sade, here is the British Hawk!"

'Get Ready To Fly' by Grits starts to play over the arena. The fans start to cheer loudly as The British Hawk rises via a lift from beneath he stage, with Lady Bianca de Sade at his side. He is wearing his ususal wrestling attire and with a black hooded jacket with the hood up. He walks off the lift and raises his arms up triggering stage pyros to go off. He walks down to the ramp and enters the ring. He climbs onto a turnbuckle and removes his hood and taunts to the fans who cheer loudly, while Lady Bianca de Sade cheers for her man.

Brad Blood: "Did you know that Lady Bianca de Sade's first name is really Lady, and not Bianca?"

Jim Jackson: "Uh...trivia aside, the British Hawk was part of the gauntlet match for the formerly vacant Ligero Maximo title, but managed to position himself as the first challenger against the man who did win that gauntlet."

Jasmine Lee: "His opponent, and the reigning Ligero Maximo! Here is Lucian Blackheart!"

The arena lights go out. "Ability to Create a War" by A Skylit Drive blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with red smoke. Red spotlights scatter around the arena and then shines on and follow the Ligero Maximo, Lucian Blackheart, as he makes his way to the ring posing and interacting with the fans. He proudly shows off his newly won title belt, even as the British Hawk looks on.

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart now the Ligero Maximo after Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing outright announced he didn't want to be associated with any ULOL championship, so long as Marcus Troy is the General Manager."

Brad Blood: "We can't have a title without a champion for it, though. And Blackheart's stepped up to take the belt. But he's got a big challenge from the British Hawk, who also challenged Q for the Ligero Maximo when Q was the champion."

Jim Jackson: "That was supposed to be a championship ladder match at Here's Your H.E.R.P.E.S. for the Ligero Maximo, but Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing changed it into a title bout for his own Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing. Which led to him being stripped of the Ligero Maximo title."

Jasmine Lee: "The official for this title match is Jack B. Nimble. And now...LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Ultimately, Lucian Blackheart came up as the next to win the title, but he's taking on a British Hawk who has been gunning for the Ligero Maximo for quite some time."

Brad Blood: "The British Hawk has overcome so much adversity to get his life and career back on track. Beating Lucian for the title will cap off his inspiring comeback."

Jim Jackson: "But Blackheart score the first strike. TBH manages to fire back, but Blackheart scoring more strikes. TBH grabbing at the Ligero Maximo for a headlock, but Lucian sends him running to the NO! TBH spins around to get behind Blackheart, and he cinches him in for another headlock!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian throws him off on the second try, but Hawk takes him down with a tackle on the rebound!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart and TBH running the ropes. TBH leapfrogs over Blackheart. Quickly pivots on his toes to dropkick Blackheart as he bounces off the ropes!"

Brad Blood: "But his second dropkick is blocked by Lucian! The champ with a diving forearm to rock TBH!"

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart pressing his advantage, and snapmares British Hawk. Kicks Hawk in the chest while he's down!"

Brad Blood: "He's going for the pin right away!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One!"

Brad Blood: "Too early for the count, but the champ is making Hawk use his energy to kick out, and that's a smart ploy."

Jim Jackson: "Take note that this is a falls count anywhere match. Pinfalls can be scored practically anywhere, so long as there's a referee present to count the pin."

Brad Blood: "These sorta matches could end up practically anywhere."

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart is countered, and TBH with a Manhattan drop to stun him! Big punch takes Blackheart down!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk grabbing him, but Blackheart pushes him away!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH goes after him but Lucian ducks! Blackheart with a dropkick of his own! The Ligero Maximo grabs TBH, and throws him out of the ring!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk grabs onto the ropes! He's pulling himself back in!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart sees him! Goes after TBH, but the challenger rocks him with big punches! He grabs Blackheart, and snaps his throat across the top rope!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk homing in after him!"

Jim Jackson: "Springboard bodypress takes Blackheart down!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Doesn't get the three, but a snap suplex takes the Ligero Maximo back down!"

Brad Blood: "Blackheart manages to punch Hawk to put some space between them! That got Hawk square on the nose!"

Jim Jackson: "But the British Hawk catches Lucian with another Manhattan drop! Blackheart bent over! Gets lifted up and lands on another atomic drop!"

Brad Blood: "Blackheart's lower abdominal area is in a lot of pain!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH...drops Lucian Blackheart with a backcracker! And Blackheart is bailing out of the ring!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk going out after him!"

Jim Jackson: "The Ligero Maximo reeling from the British Hawk's assault! TBH stalking him on the outside! Running clothesline does not connect! Lucian runs TBH into the barricade!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian Blackheart with the presence of mind to figure out where Hawk was coming from! And now he clotheslines Hawk against the barricade!"

Jim Jackson: "That hit nearly sends TBH tumbling into the crowd! Lucian Blackheart still stumbling about after TBH's offense, though. And he tries shaking off the pain by punting the British Hawk over the barricade!"

Brad Blood: "Jack B. Nimble going out after them! Lucian Blackheart climbing over the barricade after Hawk!"

Jim Jackson: "The fans are clearing out of the way, as the Ligero Maximo chases after his challenger! The British Hawk has engaged in various special stipulation matches to get to this point. Imagine the boost he'd get if he defeats Lucian Blackheart to become the new Ligero Maximo champion."

Brad Blood: "It's not like Lucian had it easy, Jim. Blackheart had to win a gauntlet match to become champ. The same match the British Hawk failed to win, by the way!"

Jim Jackson: "They're fighting their way up the stands! TBH manages to hiptoss Lucian Blackheart onto the aisle!"

Brad Blood: "Nothing but cold concrete to break Blackheart's fall!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH...trying to grab at Blackheart's feet! He's trying to pull him, maybe for a Boston crab or slingshot! Blackheart can't kick him off!"

Brad Blood: "And Hawk goes for a slingshot!"

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart crashes into some chairs!"

Brad Blood: "That bump took a bit out of Hawk too! That ain't a wrestling canvas he's falling onto!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk holding the back of his head, as he tries to roll Lucian Blackheart over for the pin! He's clearing away the chairs...and he's got him covered!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!"

Brad Blood: "No dice!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH protesting the count, but the official telling him it's only a two. Lady Bianca de Sade approaching the wrestlers, as she is understandably concerned for her man."

Brad Blood: "She better not get too close, though. No telling what sort of collateral damage happens in this type of match."

Jim Jackson: "TBH picks up NO Blackheart stuns him with a chop to the throat! He tosses a soda in TBH's face!"

Brad Blood: "THE BRITISH HAWK HAS A CUT!!!"

Jim Jackson: "..."

Brad Blood: "Ah, sorry. Channeling TWG for a moment there."

Jim Jackson: "While Brad Blood is going on a nostalgia trip, Lucian Blackheart is fighting to retake the advantage from the British Hawk! He manages to throw TBH off his feet!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk somehow rolling through the toss, but he still would have felt some of that!"

Jim Jackson: "Just to confirm, the British Hawk did NOT get bloodied up from having a soda tossed in his face. The Ligero Maximo has him on the defensive!"

Brad Blood: "They're making their way to the back!"

Jim Jackson: "Hawk pushes his way past the doors, but he manages to catch Blackheart with a big kick, as the champion chases after him! He lunges after Blackheart!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian shoves him off! And he slams the door into Hawk's face!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH stumbles! Blackheart grabs at him, trying to force him to the floor! But the challenger kicks him hard in the knee!"

Brad Blood: "That may have just busted Lucian's kneecap!"

Jim Jackson: "Jawbreaker by TBH! But he lands hard on his tailbone to hit that move! Blackheart is laid out on the floor!"

Brad Blood: "Lady Bianca egging on her man to cover the Ligero Maximo!"

Jim Jackson: "He's got Lucian covered! Trying to hook the leg!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Only a two! The British Hawk's wiping out the taste of door from his mouth."

Brad Blood: "Forget what the door tastes like, just cover the guy!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH looking to finish off Lucian, pulling him to his feet but Blackheart rams Hawk into the wall! And the Ligero Maximo walking away, trying to recover his bearings!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk chases after him!"

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart just grabbed that janitor's cart, and threw a bucket of gook at TBH!"

Brad Blood: "This type of match can get very messy, indeed!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk sidesteps the janitor's cart Lucian Blackheart shoves after him! He's chasing after the Ligero Maximo!"

Brad Blood: "They're heading for the exit!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian pushes down a vending machine, blocking the hallway! TBH trying to climb over the machine, even as Blackheart reaches for the exit!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk is gaining on him!"

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart tries slamming another door on TBH, but the challenger blocks it! He tackles Lucian! They're now in the parking lot!"

Brad Blood: "The British Hawk tries to keep Lucian Blackheart down! But Blackheart punching back! It's just a long brawl here!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk...trying to lock Lucian Blackheart into a pinning move! But...Blackheart rolling around, tryng to counter it! Blackheart rolls free of TBH! And now he's kicking away at TBH!"

Brad Blood: "Lady Bianca de Sade looks very distressed by this!"

Jim Jackson: "And now Blackheart has the British Hawk...lifts him up and rams him into NO!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk poked him in the eye!"

Jim Jackson: "The Ligero Maximo drops his challenger after the eyepoke! TBH with a superkick to take Lucian off his feet!"

Brad Blood: "This could be it! TBH has Lucian on the ground!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk goes for the cover! The referee goes to position!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Brad Blood: "But no! Lucian kicks out!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk cannot believe it! He has no time to argue with the official!"

Brad Blood: "Yeah! He's got the Ligero Maximo right where he wants him! He has to finish it!"

Jim Jackson: "TBH...he's hooking him around Lucian Blackheart's head! Setting him up for a British Slam!"

Brad Blood: "OW!!!"

Jim Jackson: "But Blackheart kicks him HARD downstairs! He hooks TBH and HURLS him into a windshield!"

Brad Blood: "HAWK JUST SMASHED THROUGH THE GLASS!"

Jim Jackson: "That car's airbags just inflated! TBH'S HEAD IS SMOTHERED BY THE AIRBAGS!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian tries to pull him out, but he's taken a beating from this match!"

Jim Jackson: "He's dragged Hawk onto the hood of the car...and he's climbing on top to pin him!"

Brad Blood: "This could be it!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Brad Blood: "LUCIAN RETAINS!"

Jim Jackson: "NO NO! JACK B. NIMBLE CONFIRMS THAT TBH SOMEHOW KICKED OUT!"

Brad Blood: "I DON'T BELIEVE IT!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart drags TBH to his feet! The British Hawk bleeding badly! HE'S SLIPPING TBH IN THE ROLL OF FATE!"

Brad Blood: "His modified triangle choke will take Hawk out of the fight!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk struggling wildly! He's trying to pry Blackheart's hands off him! Blackheart holding on tight, in a bid to keep the title!"

Brad Blood: "Hawk...he's trying to pull Blackheart to his feet!"

Jim Jackson: "He's got Blackheart piggybacking on him! THROWS HIMSELF BACKWARDS INTO ANOTHER CAR, SLAMMING BLACKHEART IN THE PROCESS!"

Brad Blood: "I DON'T BELIEVE IT!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart and TBH crumple to the pavement! They're crunching each other as hard as they can!"

Brad Blood: "These guys are gonna have to really dig deep, and find that extra bit of stamina and desire, if they want to win this!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart...gets to his feet. But TBH counters! Picks him up on his shoulders!"

Brad Blood: "He's going for an FU!"

Jim Jackson: "BUT BLACKHEART SOMERSAULTS AND LANDS ON HIS FEET!"

Brad Blood: "HOW'D HE DO THAT!"

Jim Jackson: "Hawk and Blackheart are trading blows! They're fighting all the way out of the parking lot!"

Brad Blood: "That's the highway!"

Jim Jackson: "Jack B. Nimble trying to direct them to stay off the road! But both men staggering about as they hammer away at each other!"

Brad Blood: "And TBH staggers Blackheart with a solid kick to the midsection! HE'S GOING FOR THE BRITISH SLAM"

Jim Jackson: "BLACKHEART PUSHES HIM OFF! LOOK OUT FOR THAT TRUCK!"

Brad Blood: "OMIGOD!"

Jim Jackson: "HAWK GOT OUT OF THE WAY! HE BARELY MISSED THAT TRUCK"

Brad Blood: "LUCIAN SUPLEXES HIM FROM BEHIND!"

Jim Jackson: "HAWK'S LAID OUT! BLACKHEART HAS HIM COVERED!"

Brad Blood: "HE'S HOOKING THE LEG! WITH A HANDFUL OF TIGHTS!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jim Jackson: "LUCIAN BLACKHEART RETAINS!"

Jasmine: "The winner of the match...and STILL the Ligero Maximo! He is Lucian Blackheart!"

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The Morbidly Obese Man: "THEY ARE DEAD!!!"

The monstrosity known as The Morbidly Obese Man pounds his fists into the lockers knocking the metal locker doors in with such force. He whips around and stomps on a bench smashing it in half. Staying out of harms way is his tag team partner, "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson who is in a foul mood himself.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Those little insects that call themselves The Age of Pain are going to BE in a lot of pain when I'm through with them. I'm going to crush them later tonight and make sure that they will be utterly destroyed. I will end their wrestling career then and there!"

The big wrestler destroys a towel bin as he continues his rampage.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "We have been going about this wrong Johnson. We tried going after Taufik, GoodFella and Schwarz but the one who we should really be after is Manolo Ferrer. He's the brains in the group, he's the leader... We need to cut this snake at the head and Manolo should be our target, once he's gone, the rest will be easy pickings..."

UJJ lets out an angry snort, trying to keep a cool head.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "You are right, we have been going about this wrong. We do need to take out Manolo, but we need to keep focused. Tonight you'll get your chance to go after the Age of Pain, keep focused on them and not Manolo. We will get to deal with him after."

UJJ wipes his head with both of his hands.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Lard Ass, we both have very important matches tonight, I get my chance to win the Primo Ultimo Championship and you determine who gets full control of ULOL, now in order for us to be successful we need to help each other out when we are in need. You got that? Then next week on Lucha Loco we invoke our rematch clause and regain our tag titles. Do we understand each other?"

A smile creeps across the lips of the big wrestler as he replies to his partner.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Crystal Johnson, crystal! Tonight we shall show the world why we are the most feared force here in ULOL. Marcus will fall. We shall destroy everyone in our way."

The big man makes his way to his partner and slaps him on the shoulder blades.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Good luck in your match Johnson, ya better give me a title shot when you beat Conway and Shogun. I can't wait to see Marcus' face after tonight. He's gonna be one sad little puppy."

The Morbidly Obese Man starts laughing loudly as the scene slowly fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The ULOL's very own Stephanie Dawson is about to step into the building, having just finished an interview with one of the ULOL's big stars, who has just left. But as she is about to step inside, she freezes in her tracks, as she sees perhaps one of the biggest names in sports entertainment in the whole world.

That name is none other than the wrestling alias of the masked marvel of the ring. He is the idol of millions, but is only known as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

Her cameraman quickly starts recording. The timestamp on the recording is 2/24/2011. Stephanie raises her microphone, hoping that Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing would spare a few moments to talk. She feels her heart skip a beat, as the masked wrestler stops in front of her.

She sees he is carrying his own title belt, the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

Stephanie begins to ask a question, but Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing cuts her off.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Hello! I am afraid I only have a few seconds to spare! These past several weeks have been a terrible and challenging time for my people and myself! What I have done to that evil zombie is but a drop of liniment, compared to the hideous atrocities he has done to my countrymen! But that barbaric snotstain named Marcus Troy and his cookie cutter brand X of a Primo would like you to forget that! That undead unfriend of my people has taken us to a very dark place! And it's only fair that I dumped that symbol of Marcus Troy up the sphincter of someone who is an even bigger a-hole than Shogun would ever hope to be!"

Stephanie Dawson: "So, what are your plans now? You've got a match at the ULOL show called Ay Basura--"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "It's a plot by that dribbling waste of pigsperm named Marcus Troy! That match will not take me off my mission! My people, and the legions of loyal fans who look up to me, demand nothing less than the burning chop of righteous vasectomy on the evildoers who have done so much harm! And as long as I have the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing, I will do my best to see it through!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing raises his masked title belt to the camera, then quickly rushes off. Stephanie Dawson cannot help but be awed by him.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

IT'S MEGA YUMMY!

IT'S MEGA MUSKY!

IT'S...

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Megapu10

IN STORES NOW!

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Manolo Ferrer is seen knocking on a door. Several moments pass before he shrugs, then begins walking away. He begins speaking as he does so.

Manolo Ferrer: "I guess I just missed catching Morbid and Stoppable. I was told they'd be here. It doesn't matter now. I'll have to pass along my message to them through this promo."

Mr. Ferrer continues walking as he addresses the tag team who are feuding with his clients.

Manolo Ferrer: "I want to be clear about something. Your hostility towards me is misplaced. Especially you, Mr. Johnson. Don't forget, several months ago I offered you my services. You turned me down."

Manolo Ferrer nonchalantly shrugs as he reminds Jack Johnson of what had happened last year. He continues, talking in a casual, conversational tone.

Manolo Ferrer: "You turned me down. Yes, you managed to score two title reigns as one half of the Campeónes Compañero, but we know the other guy did all the work. You were quite confident back then, too, challenging my clients to a handicap match. Maybe I was wrong to turn it down, if I had actually known just how unstoppable you are...at standing there in the corner."

There is no edge in Mr. Ferrer's voice as he continues to speak.

Manolo Ferrer: "As for what you're saying about 'taking me out,' well, unless it's to do business, I would have to decline. My social calendar is quite booked as it is. If it's a threat to personal well-being, I would say that's a bad idea. I do provide services to a lot of your friends and colleagues in the wrestling industry. They have bills to pay and dreams they want to come true, just like you. Although, their dreams are probably more realistic, unlike Mr. Johnson's dream of being unstoppable."

Mr. Ferrer's expression remains nonchalant and casual, as he continues talking.

Manolo Ferrer: "You two are looking at this all wrong. I'm not the bad guy here. I'm just helping my clients win a share of the pie you two have been trying to hoard for yourselves here in ULOL. Seriously, would Mr. Morbidly Obese Man die if he couldn't get all the twinkies on the tray? Your idea of charity is to eat as much as you can, for the sake of all the starving orphans and widows out there. And Mr. Johnson clearly knows a good deal when he sees it, since he continues to leech off Mr. Obesity's success. My clients are just taking their fare share. They'll continue taking until they are satisfied."

A ring tone can be heard interrupting Mr. Ferrer.

Manolo Ferrer: "Sorry, that's mine. I've said all there is to say."

He reaches for his cellphone as he walks away.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:08 am

VS

Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, here is Brostar!"

Scene opens with "I Am...All of Me' by Crush 40 plays as Brostar appears on the stage the people loudly boo at the appearance of him. He gets in the ring, grabs a mic and begins to speak.

Brostar: I'm sorry to you weren't expecting until later on but I have a public announcement to make, but before that for who that doesn't know me let me introduce myself.

Brostar: I am Brostar and I'm the pride of Australia and they called me the Aussie Hero, and they flew me to your stinkin' hometown.

With that said the crowd boo at the man's ego and cocky words.

Brostar: You shut your mouth, little girls.

Brostar: Tonight I have to face one of your own, and the man that stepped up to the challenge was Mr Q.

The crowd cheer at the mans name that Brostar said.

Brostar: So I have a message for Mr. Q I have message from Australia, tonight is not your night, this place is not the right place and I'm going to throw my fingers in the air come into this ring hit the Corkscrew 450, 1, 2, 3 its all over the Aussie Hero goes back home victories, thats all I have to say thank you folks.

With that said, the music hits as Brostar drops the mic.

A familiar nu-metal beat begins to play, and the crowd is on their feet. The cheers only get louder, when out comes the one who is the title holder of the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing. The man raises his masked belt over his head as he marches down to the ring, interrupting Brostar's exit.

The cheers and shouts of ecstasy continue loudly as he heads to the ring. For he is none other than the glorious grappler of the squared circle, the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing who is known all around the world as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "It is appropriate that I will be fighting off the trash bunnies that frolic and flop about in the ULOL! At a pay per view named Ay Basura! And it starts with the dude who calls himself Brostar!"

The Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing enters the ring, going face to face with Brostar.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Yes! You are the Brostar! Everyone knows who the Brostar is! You were the one who became a Youtube sensation by being Stank Lord's all-purpose sexy toy!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing slowly thrusts his hips suggestively at Brostar, as the big screen plays a clip from the ULOL's 11/13/2010 show.

Quote :

Stank Lord is seen talking to Brostar. Lord sees the camera and begins to speak to the Attendants.

Stank Lord: "Oh hello everyone now as you have learned from last week Brostar is under my control and must do what I say or else. Now in the next couple of weeks Brostar will be turning into me by getting smellier. Brostar do you want to say anything?"

Brostar: "No."

Stank Lord has a big grin on his face.

Stank Lord: "Thats good. Now Brostar smell my armpits."

Brostar: "What?"

Stank Lord: "I said smell my pits."

Stank Lord lifts put his arms. Brostar refuses to but then Lord grabs Brostar's head and forces him to smell the pits. Then pulls Brostar away and continues.

Stank Lord: "Now go cameraman, for the next 30 minutes Brostar will be smelling my feet."

~The camera fades away~

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You can imagine all the really naughty wrestling fanfic that came out these last few months! It was all about you and Stank Lord sitting in a tree! F-A-R-T-I-N-G!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing gives Brostar a nudge and a wink. It's hard to tell if he did wink, considering he's wearing a mask.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "It was all about Brostar and Stank Lord! Doing it in the gym! Doing it in the hotel! Doing it in the parking lot! Doing it in the locker room! Doing it in the clinic! Doing it in the shower room! With the shampoo to lube up Stank Lord as he slides it long and deep into the Brostar behind! The Stank Lord farted, and you swallowed it down! You made Australia proud!"

As if for emphasis, the big screen plays the end of Stank Lord winning his Fart Challenge with Brostar. In slow-mo.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "And that isn't the Brostar's only claim to fame! He is the one guy in the ULOL who doesn't read what's going on in HIS OWN STORYLINE! He is the one man who is too much of a bro to BOTHER reading what's going on in the ULOL!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing steps back for a moment.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You have worked so hard to represent Australia! But while you think you have a message for me from your country, I have a real one from Australia to you! They flew you here and paid all your expenses, because they wanted to get rid of you!"

The audience gasps in shock. Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing nods sympathetically.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "They didn't want you to know! A is for Australia! A is also for Anilingus! They couldn't forgive you licking and smelling Stank Lord! Down there! Every day!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points to Brostar's butt, in answer to where the action was happening. He shows the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing to Brostar.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "But I think you'd want to do something to make your country less embarrassed of you! You beat me, and this championship belt will be yours! Because the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is everything the ULOL should be, if it weren't for that ungodly waste of turkey-sperm named Marcus Troy! He is counting on you to stop me from delivering unto him the righteous sodomy he so richly deserves! And because you tried to POISON ME with your fart, you're going to get the attention you want so badly!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing again raises the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing over his head, not taking his eyes off Brostar. Though he does give him a wink.

Jasmine Lee: "The official for this title match is Don Q. Hotte. And now...LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Here we go! Q and Brostar circling each other. Q blocks Brostar's attack, and connects with his counter! But Brostar manages to catch Q's foot, and he's got him off-balanced! He clotheslines Q down!"

Brad Blood: "Brostar now trying to mount Q! In a platonic way!"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing trying to fight back to a vertical base, but Brostar smothering him! Brostar...takes Q down with a fisherman's suplex! But he doesn't bridge up for the pin!"

Brad Blood: "Brostar taking the fight to Q! Hooks him up for a butterfly suplex!"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing manages to roll to the corner, but Brostar pressing his advantage! Brostar showing a lot of aggression in this match! Q may have unintentionally inspired his opponent to put more effort into this match, especially with what he told him before their fight started."

Brad Blood: "Hey, if I was told that my own country paid to ship me out, I'd be pissed too."

Jim Jackson: "Q manages to reverse an Irish whip attempt, but he runs into an elbow from Brostar! Q is reeling! But he's got the presence of mind to duck Brostar's clothesline!"

Brad Blood: "And catch him on the rebound for a Bossman slam!"

Jim Jackson: "Q's Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is on the line in this match, even though it's not an official ULOL title. Q put his title up for a defense, daring Brostar to try and take it from him."

Brad Blood: "Q's been waging this sorta one man campaign after Marcus Troy and everyone assorted with him. And he's doing it without so much as asking Eunice Winslow for aid. "

Jim Jackson: "The result though is he's waging another front in the war against Marcus Troy."

Brad Blood: "But other than Eunice Winslow reinstating him, they've pretty much been fighting Troy on separate paths. Q seems a lot more interested in being The Guy who will shut down Marcus Troy.""

Jim Jackson: "Q has already fought Zombie, the dangerous...zombie who was responsible for killing so many of HE ROLLS UP BROSTAR IN A SMALL PACKAGE!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar kicks out! But Q pulls him down with a schoolboy!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing with an armdrag! Holds onto the arm, trying to work a submission, but Brostar fights out of it."

Brad Blood: "And he manages to take Q down with a jumping knee to the chest!"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing defending his Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing against Brostar. The United League of Lunatics doesn't recognize it as one of its titles, but Q is just fine with that, as he's stated the title is everything that the ULOL titles aren't."

Brad Blood: "Even though it's not recognized by ULOL, Q was able to defend it against Zombie on our last Lucha Loco, with General Manager Marcus Troy ordering him to defend his belt against Zombie. And before that, he and the British Hawk fought over the title in a ladder match at Here's Your H.E.R.P.E.S., even though it was supposed to be for the Ligero Maximo."

Jim Jackson: "Q managed to defend the title by beating Zombie on our last Lucha Loco, but it turned out he had somehow gotten hold of the Primo Ultimo title, and disguised it as the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing. Then he shoved the Primo Ultimo title up Zombie's ass."

Brad Blood: "I hear Shogun was very mad about that."

Jim Jackson: "Brostar counters Q, and slams him to the mat with a dragon suplex! He's bridging up for the pin!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two!"

Jim Jackson: "Doesn't get the three! Brostar...to the ropes and leaps at Q with a senton splash!"

Brad Blood: "Q rolled outta the way!"

Jim Jackson: "Q shaking off the pain of Brostar's offense, as he tries to get up before his opponent! Brostar BARELY ducks the running kick to the face!"

Brad Blood: "And he makes Q pay for his miss with a headslam to the mat! Brostar's really bringing his A game for this match! You can imagine the headlines he would make in Australia if he beats the legendary Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"

Jim Jackson: "If Brostar wins Q's title, what do we call Q's title belt then? The Correa Grande Del Oro de Brostar?"

Brad Blood: "Maybe Q never really thought that out when he decided on a name for that belt. Oh Q just dumped Brostar out of the ring!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar went for a hurricanrana, only for Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing to use his opponent's momentum to send him crashing onto the floor on the outside!"

Brad Blood: "Brostar landed hard, Jim. AND HE JUST GOT HIT BY A Q MISSILE!"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing with a plancha through the ropes, slamming Brostar into the barricade!"

Brad Blood: "That move took its toll on Q, too. Both men laying on the floor at ringside."

Jim Jackson: "Brostar and Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing have crossed paths before. Brostar ran in on a Nao Fook Mi vs Q match, and accidentally farted in Q's face."

Brad Blood: "Not exactly a high point in Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's career, I'm told."

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing now has the opportunity to get even with Brostar, but his opponent has put up a very strong challenge, in an effort to dethrone Q for the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing."

Brad Blood: "I reckon the GM might actually give Brostar a reward if he can take Q's title belt off him."

Brad Blood: "Brostar rolls back into the ring. Q follows, but Brostar cuts him off at the ropes. He's punching away at Q, trying to knock him back to the floor!"

Jim Jackson: "No, he's trying to suplex Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing back into the ring! I think he's going for the Australian Outback Blackout!"

Brad Blood: "That suplex into a spinebuster has won Brostar many matches! And he lifts Q"

Jim Jackson: "Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing pivots in midmove, and lands behind Brostar! Brostar rushes at him, but is tripped up into the ropes!"

Brad Blood: "He's recovering quickly, though!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar lashes out, but Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing blocks the punch! He reaches out and YANKS ALL THE HAIR FROM BROSTAR'S ARMPIT!"

Brad Blood: "BROSTAR HAS A CUT!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar can barely stand! Q hits the Wakangadiiehiyaojiasaiya!"

Brad Blood: "Brostar falls lifeless to the mat!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match, and STILL the Correa Grande Del Oro de Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing, it's Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"

Jim Jackson: "Q successfully defends his title against Brostar!"

Brad Blood: "He scalped the guy! Well, rather, I armpitted the guy! He's holding Brostar's armpit hair like a trophy!"

Jim Jackson: "It could be worse! Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing could have done to Brostar what he did to Zombie!"

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Stephanie Dawson can be seen walking quickly behind someone.

Stephanie Dawson: "Excuse me Shogun? I was wanting to ask you a few questions can you please stop?"

Shogun can now be seen heading towards the ring with a look of pure intensity on his face completely oblivious to Stephanie's calls. He keeps walking on until the woman eventually gives up looking almost worried as Shogun always stops for an interview with her before a title match. He walks on with his title over his shoulder as his music can be heard now in the arena. The true test has finally begun.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and Gentlemen, my guest at this time is a participant in the triangle elimination match for the Primo Ultimo Championship! He is none other than "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson!!"

The camera zooms out to reveal the large and well built man that is UJJ. It is clear that he is trying to keep calm.

Stephanie Dawson: "Jack, a lot has transpired over the last few days that concern you. You and Zombie have developed a type of a rivalry, alongside you feud with the Age of Pain. You lost your tag titles to them, only to regain them and then lose them again in a controversial decision war by Eunice and Marcus, now you are going into this triangle elimination match, which you believe should be a one on one match, still not 100%"

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Stephanie, your right a lot has happened to me in the last few weeks, let alone the last few days. It has been mental. More mental then I ever thought it would be. This by far the most crazy place I have ever been too. Its been hard for both me and Lard Ass to keep focused at the tasks at hand but we are coping, for now. I try to block out these distractions but its proving too hard. After tonight, I'll just have to unleash the beast inside me and sort out everything myself. But that will happen after tonight. Because I have to remain focused on my match which, yes, should be a one on one match. I may not be 100% but I have overcame bigger challenges then this and have came out on top."

Stephanie Dawson: "But what about Zombie? And the big 8 man elimination tag match thats taking place later on tonight?"

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Me and TMOM have already discussed what we will do, in need we will help each other because that is what a functioning tag team does. They help each other out. As for Zombie, I just hope that TMOM flattens him into a tiny undead pancake, if he decides to continue fighting after that, then i will personally rip him apart."

Stephanie Dawson: "You also mentioned that if you were to become the Primo Ultimo Champion, you would give TMOM the first dibs on challenging for the title. Is that still the case?"

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "It's not a matter of IF I win Steph, It's a matter of when I win. Shogun has been champion for 4 months now and to be honest, we need a new one. I said this before and I'll say it again. I am the one who can dethrone Shogun, I am the one who can best his abilities. Eunice even said it herself. And as for TMOM, yes that deal still stands, it will always stand. Now excuse me Steph, I must get ready."

UJJ turns and walks out of view, Stephanie waves goodbye as she finishes the segment.

Stephanie Dawson: "Well what was a shaky start between the Morbidly Unstoppable members has turned into fine chemistry, It is hard to believe that these two were mortal enemies once before. I'm Stephanie Dawson, closing another interview."

Stephanie smiles as the scene fades to black.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Alexander is standing backstage next to ULOL's resident interviewer, Stephanie Dawson. Alexander is dressed in his usual tuxedo while Stephanie is dressed in her best jacket and skirt.

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and Gentleman, please welcome my guest at this time, Alexander Conway."

A few faint boos can be heard in the distance.

Stephanie Dawson: "Thank you for taking this time to answer my questions, Alex."

Alexander nods at Stephanie as he awaits her question.

Stephanie Dawson: "Alexander, you have a huge match tonight. One that is against not only the first, only, and reigning Primo Ultimo Champion, Shogun, but also against "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson."

A few moments of silence follows before Alexander leans in towards Stephanie's microphone.

Alexander Conway: "Was there a question in that?"

Stephanie Dawson: "I want to know how you plan to deal with these two. So far, you are 0-4 when it comes to Primo Ultimo Championship matches, and 0-1 when it comes to the Ligero Maximo Championship. Why do you think you will be triumphant now, when you have failed so many times in the past."

Alexander remains silent, considering the question for a few brief moments before answering her.

Alexander Conway: "Because Stephanie, it has been prophesied that I shall win tonight. That's why I think I will be triumphant now. It is my destiny to win this match tonight, it is my destiny to prove how good I really am. The other times I have failed against Shogun have been through hook and crook. The Ligero....well, I actually don't remember what happened that night, I took too many head-shots. But, the point is, that nothing shall stop me from finally getting what should have been mine since the beginning."

Stephanie Dawson: "What about the backstage politics? The allies of the other two participants? How do you plan to deal with any interference that could come by way of Team Marcus or The Morbidly Obese Man?"

Alexander Conway: "Although it has been predetermined that I shall take that title here tonight, I am no fool. I shall not expose myself to more pain than is necessary to win. I have instructed The DWMA, Ray Kamaura and Leon Hinomoto, to watch this match. They shall come to my aid should anyone else but the referee, Shogun, Johnson, and Alexander Conway, enter that ring. But, they both realize how much this match means to me, and they have pledged that they will not lay a finger on either Shogun or Johnson unless it is in self-defense."

Stephanie Dawson: "Alexander, one final question, how do you actually plan to win this match? What will be your strategy?"

Alexander gives a slight smile.

Alexander Conway: "I guess you will just have to wait and see, huh?"

Alexander turns and strides out of the camera's frame. Stephanie watches him go before sighing and signaling for the camera to cut.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The scene opens in the infirmary. Dr. Booboo B. Gone is standing over his treatment table, looking curiously down at the undead wrestler sat up before him. Zombie looks at the doctor and looks down at his gaping wound.

Zombie: "It does that. The infection heals it there's no point in any treatment. Besides I'm a sitting duck here. After the match with Q suddenly I'm worth more to Troy, that idiot Shogun and Winslow's band of inbreeds."

Dr. Booboo B. Gone: "Yes I realize that the infection is healing you. I have dealt with you before Zombie!"

Zombie: "So why am I here?"

Dr. Booboo B. Gone: "You said yourself Zombie. Your suddenly worth a lot more than just some undead stinking corpse. You got that Primo Ultimo belt lodged inside you. Troy wants it out and I'm here to help him and you."

Zombie chuckles and wags his finger at the doctor.

Zombie: "Who said you would be helping me? What if I don't wanna give it back? If Shogun is fool enough to misplace his belt and let Q get his hands on it, what else does he expect?"

Zombie pushes the doctor away and stands up off the treatment table.

Zombie: "Shogun has been more than a problem lately. Says he's a demonic god and yet he doesn't rejoice at the slaughter of a thousand people? He's not demonic and he certainly ain't no god. I think it's time he learned a lesson, let's see how he copes WITHOUT his little belt!"

Zombie smiles and goes to leave....

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:08 am

VS

VS

Jim Jackson: "Coming up next we have the title match everybody has been talking about! Three men, one title! Shogun shall be defending his Primo Ultimo title against Alexander Conway and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson. Will he still walk out the champion after this match or shall we be seeing the end of Shogun's age of darkness?"

Brad Blood: "Well Shogun has defeated these two men before Jim so he is clearly favored by the experts to win this match."

Suddenly the ULOL Tron comes to life and we see the image of Mrs. Eunice Winslow the VGM of ULOL.

Eunice P. Winslow: "Good evening, as we all know the past month we have seen a lot of interruptions in our matches. Tonight with this very important match, I would like to add that whoever comes out to disrupt this match in anyway shall be suspended without pay indefinitely! Thank you! Now let the match commence!"

The screen blinks out as the crowd starts cheering at the announcement.

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is the co-main event of the evening and it is a three-way elimination match for the ULOL Primo Ultimo Title! Introducing first the champion, Shogun!"

A Victim, A Target by Misery Signals blasts though the arena speakers ans the lights begin to flash on and off. As the lyrics begin Shogun bursts from behind the curtains with fire erupting from the ramp beside him. Shogun begins to make his way to the ring with a look of pure intensity on his face. as he makes it to the ring he runs up and rolls into the ring the expression on his face unchanged.

Jim Jackson: "And there's the champ, the usually strong worded Shogun has been kind of quiet this whole time. Very uncharacteristic of our reigning champ."

Brad Blood: "Don't forget there seems to be some friction between Shogun and the general manager Marcus Troy. Though they are allies, there seems to be some communication problems between the two."

Jasmine Lee: "And introducing next, one of the challengers, Alexander Conway!"

"Hunt You Down" by Saliva blares throughtout the arena as Alexander Conway makes his way to the ring.

Jim Jackson: "Conway has challenged and failed to obtain the Primo Ultimo title for a number of times now, will tonight be the night where his luck changes?"

Brad Blood: "Conway has been strong in ULOL except for when he faces Shogun."

Jasmine Lee: "And introducing last, one of the challengers, "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson!"

"Papercut" by Linkin Park blasts over the arena as "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson enters the stage through a spark shower. He makes his way to the ring. He enters the ring and climbs a turnbuckle, scouting the entire arena.

Jim Jackson: "UJJ, one of the more dominant force here in ULOL will also be vying for the title after getting a title shot for beating Zombie, still as we can see he is not at one hundred percent."

Brad Blood: "Well that's his fault for teaming up with TMOM and going against The Age of Pain and Zombie. You reap what you sow."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Don Q. Hotte. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! All three men are in the ring eyeing each other out being cautious... Conway and UJJ charges towards the champ! It's a double team right from the start. Both Conway and UJJ starts landing hard blows on the champ. Shogun cannot find an opening to retaliate and can only raise his arms up in defense."

Brad Blood: "Oh that is just low. What happened to fair play? Mano y mano? Now they have Shogun on the corner! The champ is getting pummeled bad!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ lifts Shogun up on his shoulders in a fireman carry! Oh! Shogun hits the canvas... Conway hits a neckbreaker on UJJ just after he hits the fireman carry! Shogun staggers to his feet... Conway with a stungun! The champ is down! Conway locks in a half-Boston on the champ..."

Brad Blood: "SPEAR BY UJJ TAKES CONWAY DOWN!!! Oh that has got to hurt. UJJ stomps on Conway trying to grind him to the ground... The champ sneaks up behind UJJ! He gets his arms below UUJ's armpits!"

Jim Jackson: "Full Nelson slam! Shogun is back in control. Shogun with an Irish whip sends UJJ right into the corner. Shogun picks Conway up... Irish whip sends Conway crashing into UJJ! Shogun charges in..."

Brad Blood: "The champ just made a Conway and UJJ sandwich! The champ is on fire!"

Jim Jackson: "Body slam on Conway! Shogun picks UJJ up... Powerbomb unto Conway! Shogun hooks Conway's leg!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Conway kicks out! Shogun turns to cover "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson..."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "UJJ gets a shoulder up! Shogun drags UJJ up to his feet... Uppercut from out of nowhere by UJJ connects! Shogun staggers back right into Conway's direction, Conway rolls the champ up..."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Shogun kicks out! Ooh! Dropkick right into the face of the champ by Conway! Conway quickly locks in a figure four leglock! Shogun is in pain! He tries to reach for the ropes... UJJ PULLS THE ROPE OUT OF SHOGUN'S REACH!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Shogun screams invectives at UJJ! Shogun tries to break free but Conway has him locked in tight... WAIT!!! SHOGUN FLIPS OVER! NOW IT'S SHOGUN WITH THE REVERSED FIGURE FOUR ON CONWAY! Great counter! Conway this time tries to go for the ropes..."

Brad Blood: "WAHAHAHA! UJJ is a genius! He pulls the ropes away from Conway's grasp! HOLY CRUD! CONWAY JUST FLIPPED OVER AGAIN! The pressure is now back on Shogun's legs!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ is just sitting back enjoying the show watching both men try and make each other tap! Wait! Conway and Shogun realizes that UJJ is just doing nothing! Both men disengage! They charge towards UJJ! UJJ charges towards Shogun and Conway... Shogun and Conway ducks under a two arm clothesline! They bounce back on the ropes... Double running bulldog!"

Brad Blood: "UJJ gets planted on the canvas! Conway turns on Shogun and throws a couple of knees unti Shogun's midsection! Double axe handle sends Shogun down! Conway is smokin'!"

Jim Jackson: "Conway grabs Shogun and locks in a triangle choke! Shogun lifts himself and Conway up in an amazing feat of strength! Conway still has his legs locked in around Shogun's head! UJJ COMES CHARGING IN!!! SPEAR!!! Shogun goes down taking Conway with him! UJJ pins Shogun!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "The champ kicks out! Shogun picks the champ up... WHOA!!! FLYING CROSSBODY BY CONWAY TAKES BOTH MEN DOWN! Oh man! We have three men down!"

Jim Jackson: "Conway is the first to get back on his feet using the ropes to prop himself up. UJJ gets up next... UJJ charges... Conway pulls the top rope down... UJJ GOES OVER AND CRASHES TO THE OUTSIDE!"

Brad Blood: "Conway doesn't see the champ who comes in with a clothesline that knocks him over the top rope! Conway falls on UJJ! The champ guages the distance... HE SLINGSHOTS HIMSELF OVER THE TOP ROPE TAKING BOTH MEN DOWN!"

Jim Jackson: "The referee has begun the ten count! Shogun gets up and drags Conway back into the ring! Shogun locks in an armbar on Conway! conway screams in pain! Wait UJJ enters the ring. Shogun releases Conway and takes UJJ down with a shoulder block!"

Brad Blood: "Irish whip by Shogun sends UJJ into the corner! Shogun grabs Conway... Oh! Backbreaker! That softened up Conway's back... Shogun locks in a Boston crab! Conway is in trouble!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ with a clothesline almost takes Shogun's head off! "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson stalks Shogun waiting for him to turn around. Once he does "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson jumps up applying a three quarter facelock to Shogun slamming him down on the mat executing a Brutal JKO! Oh! The champ is down! UJJ with the pin!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Shogun kicks out! UJJ cannot believe it! Wait now Conway picks Shogun up... Alexander Conway hits Shogun with an enziguri kick, quickly picks Shogun up, and throws him/her with a release German Suplex. Alexander Conway then waits for him to get back to his feet before hiting Shogun with a super kick executing a Dark Demise! Shogun is down! conway for the pin!"

Jim Jackson: "Wait UJJ walks over! He adds his weight to Conway's A double pin on the champ!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"

Brad Blood: "And with that we now know we will be having a new champion here tonight! It took two finishers and both men to pin Shogun to make sure he stays down!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ and Conway looks at each other. They have just eliminated probably the biggest threat in the match. Conway strikes first! Conway with repeated kicks to UJJ's ribs! A side kick to the head and UJJ goes down! Conway for the cover!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "UJJ kicks out at two! "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson fights his way back up to his feet. Talk about tenacious... Wait... I think UJJ is beginning to slow down."

Jim Jackson: "UJJ's injury from the beatdown from The Age of Pain and Zombie are beginning to take their toll. Conway knows this and concentrates hiss strikes in UJJ's injured parts... UJJ is clutching his ribs now... Conway goes low and takes UJJ's legs from under him with a forearm to the back of the knee!"

Brad Blood: "UJJ is showing wear and tear! He is breathing heavily now. Conway has a smile on his face! Alexander Conway forces "Unstoppable" Jack Johsnon to the ground, catches Unstoppable" Jack Johsnon's left arm in a leg scissor and then locks his hands over Unstoppable" Jack Johsnon's face, pulling Unstoppable" Jack Johsnon's head backwards executing The Prophecy. UJJ is in trouble!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ is trying to reach for the ropes! He's almost there... WAIT!!! IT'S SHOGUN!!! SHOGUN JUST PULLED THE ROPES AWAY! Talk about revenge! UJJ did that to Shogun earlier and now Shogun is returning the favor! UJJ is screaming at Shogun! UJJ TAPS!!! UJJ TAPS!!! The ref calls for the bell!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and NEW ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion... Alexander Conway!"

Brad Blood: "CONWAY WON! CONWAY WON!"

Jim Jackson: "Tonight Alexander Conway ends the reign of Shogun as the ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion! What a match! What a night!"

Brad Blood: "Well now the only problem is how will Conway take the belt out of Zombie's darkness?"

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Stephanie Dawson favorite backstage interviewer of United League of Lunatics. She is standing at the doors of the Age of Pain. She knocks and Felix Schwarz opens the door then after several minutes Arnold Bold comes out.

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and Gentleman my guest at this time are two time ULOL Campeónes Compañero, GoodFella & Schwarz. So guys how do you feel being champions again."

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "How do we feel of being champions again? Well, I could say that I feel great to becoming two time tag team champions."

Felix Schwarz: "No need to brag my friend, but you know I just could say yeah we did it, we took what is ours from these walk and talk losers… And these babies will stay with us for a long, long time."

Stephanie Dawson: "And today you are being selected to be in the Team Marcus and will face team of Raven Conn…"

She gets interrupted by Arnold “GoodFella “ Bold, who has something important to say.

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "First of all, we know who is in Team Eunice or should I say the team of losers? Look at that little sperm Little Wang.. He’s total joke of the wrestler, then we have two women and bigger version of Little Wang called The Morbidly Obese Man….The Most dominant force? Yeah right... If you ask me these guys and girls are no threat at all.

Felix Schwarz: "I think we said more than enough."

GoodFella and Schwarz enters the locker room to prepare for the match and Stephanie Dawson left standing there.

Stephanie Dawson: "Well those were the current reigning ULOL Campeónes Compañero GoodFella & Schwarz. Well good luck to them in the match against Team Eunice."

Manolo Ferrer: "The important thing is we should not get cocky."

The Champions greet their manager, Manolo Ferrer, as he approaches. Stephanie points the microphone to him.

Manolo Ferrer: "You have a chance to build on your legacy, by defeating Team Eunice. You'll have to go full-bore on all of them. It doesn't matter if you're fighting a midget, or beautiful women. You must show them what you're made of as Champions, and crush them. Who knows? They might like it."

Manolo Ferrer notes the questioning look Stephanie has on her face.

Manolo Ferrer: "That's what Mr. Troy told me about Raven Connolly. Now, if you'll excuse us, we need to get ready."

The manager gently, but firmly, shows Stephanie Dawson where to go, as the interview ends.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

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Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

The scene opens and we see Stephanie Dawson standing backstage with Raven Connoly.

Stephanie Dawson: "I'm backstage with Raven Connoly who has a huge match tonight as a member of Team Winslow who are taking on Team Marcus, how are you feeling about the match Raven?"

Raven Connoly: "I feel great about the match tonight, me and my team have been waiting for this moment. You see, in tonight's match Team Marcus have no where to run, nowhere to hide. They won't be able to rely on their sneak attacks, there mob attacks, or any of their other under handed tactics. This time we are all going to be out there, and we are going to come on full force, they are going to wish they never started this war."

Stephanie Dawson: "That is true, but what about Manolo Ferrer, and Marcus Troy for that manner."

Raven Connoly: "Don't get me wrong Stephanie, we aren't naive, we know good and well there are going to be some underhandedness, but this is a hell of a team, and we are going to be able to overcome anything that gets thrown at us. I'm tired of Marcus thinking he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants, him and Manolo can dish out whatever they want, my team will overcome and win this match."

Stephanie Dawson: "A few weeks ago you slapped Marcus right across the face, Marcus still hasn't really done anything about that, don't you think he might want to settle that score up tonight."

Raven Connoly: "I'm sure he does, like I said Stephanie, I'm ready for it and expecting it. Marcus can do whatever he wants, I can handle it, I've beat him before, I'll do it again. His idea that he can treat people however he wants and do whatever he wants is going to get thrown in his face tonight. Look at our team, TMOM, Little Wang, Nao Fook Mi, and myself, Eunice has made herself a dream team, there nothing we can't handle. Now Team Marcus is impressive as well, and it won't be an easy win by any means, but it WILL be a win, mark my words."

Stephanie Dawson: "And if it isn't?"

Raven Connoly: "That isn't an option Stephanie."

Raven walks off down the hall.

Stephanie Dawson: "Some strong words from Raven Connoly, but will her and Team Winslow be able to back it up, we find out tonight."

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

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VS

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Jim Jackson: "Well this is the match that everyone has been waiting for, the match that will decide the fate of ULOL!"

Brad Blood: "That's right, Team Eunice against Team Marcus, this will be one helluva match! On one side you have, Oriental Spices, Raven Connoly and The Morbidly Obese Man, on the other side we have The Age of Pain and Zombie. I feel the collision of these two teams will tear this place asunder."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a four versus four elimination tag match! Introducing first, Team Eunice, Little Wang, Nao Fook Mi, Raven Connoly and The Morbidly Obese Man!"

Oriental music starts playing on the background as smoke covers the mouth of the entrance tunnel. Suddenly out leaps Nao Fook Mi wearing a short cheongsam. Little Wang pops up from in between her legs. They quickly makes their way down entrance ramp and enters the ring. They bow and give their respect to the crowd before heading to their corner.

"Warriors Code" By The Dropkick Murphy's starts to play throughout the arena. Raven runs out onto the stage, she throws her fist in the air and screams as a barrage of fireworks go off behind her.

THUMP!!! THUMP!!! THUMP!!!

The earth reverberated and shook as the monstrosity known as The Morbidly Obese Man squeezed himself out of the now visibly cracked entrance tunnel. There is no entrance music and no video playing on the Titan Tron. Just one massive form that looks bigger than an elephant. The crowd stares in stunned silence, not knowing what to make of the super-sized behemoth making his way down the entrance ramp as the floors creak with every step. As The Morbidly Obese Man reaches the ring he climbs up the steel steps the crowd wonders how this "thing" can enter the ring. But lo and behold in a feat of utter incredibility and great fat flexing ability, The Morbidly Obese Man somehow squeezed through the ring ropes and enters the ring which sighs heavily under his weight.

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next, Arnold "GoodFella" Bold, Felix Schwarz, Taufik and Zombie, Team Marcus!"

"Fire Flame" by Birdman starts to sound, the light suddenly turns off after a few seconds it starts again and Felix and Arnold are standing in the middle of the ring and waving to their fans.

"All that Remains" started playing as Taufik walks out and pryos started to come out as he makes his way to the ring with his trusty Singapore Cane. When he reaches the ring, he raises his Singapore Cane as another set of pryos come out before he waits for his victim.

"Creeping Death" by Metallica plays as Zombie slowly walks out. Zombie strolls down to the ring and steps into the ring.

Jim Jackson: "We can all feel the tension in the air, it is clear that these two teams want to go at it real bad."

Brad Blood: "It's like there's an aura of hostility is emanating from the ring."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And it looks like The Morbidly Obese Man and Taufik will be starting off for their respective teams. There's the bell! Taufik charges in throwing punches at The Morbidly Obese Man!"

Brad Blood: "Whoa! The Morbidly Obese Man is just standing there soaking all the damage as if they were nothing! Taufik is beginning to tire out!"

Jim Jackson: "Headbutt by TMOM! Taufik staggers around! The Morbidly Obese Man shoves his opponent down unto the mat, he leaps up into the air and sits down on them with such force crushing them to the canvas and pinning them to the mat executing a morbidly horrifying Massive Sit Down!!! Oh! Taufik gets nailed bad! The ref starts to count."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two!"

Brad Blood: "Wait! In comes GoodFella for the save! Wait no! GoodFella tries to save his partner but his strikes does nothing to the immovable TMOM who is still sitting on Taufik!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Taufik has been eliminated!"

Jim Jackson: "Just like that Taufik gets eliminated! Team Marcus is one man down!"

Brad Blood: "OH EEEEEEEEW! TMOM had to pull Taufik who got wedged in between his butt cheeks. Now that's one darkness that will swallow you whole."

Jim Jackson: "Next up for Team Marcus is GoodFella! Arnold "GoodFella" Bold cautiously approaches The Morbidly Obese Man, he lands a few low kicks at TMOM's shin keeping out of TMOM's grasp! GoodFella attacks low hitting a dropkick right into TMOM's knee! TMOM falls to one knee... Shining wizard!"

Brad Blood: "Oh! TMOM goes down! GoodFella goes for a leg drop... HOW CAN YOU MISS SOMEONE FORTY FEET WIDE?! TMOM manages to roll away! TMOM gets a tag... Here comes the midget!"

Jim Jackson: "Little Wang leaps unto the top ring post, he leaps towards GoodFella... Arnold "GoodFella" Bold intercept Little Wang with open arms! He catches Little Wang in mid-air foiling the flying crossbody! Powerslam by GoodFella on Little Wang! GoodFella for the pin!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Wang wiggles out from under GoodFella! Little Wang lunges towards GoodFella's face! Oh! Right in-between the eyes!"

Jim Jackson: "Little Wang uses the ropes to get some airtime... Arnold "GoodFella" Bold intercepts the springboard corkscrew splash with a dropkick! Little Wang gets flung back into the ropes! Little Wang bounces back spinning out of control... double axe handle smashes unto Little Wang sending him to the mat! GoodFella for the pin!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Try as he might, GoodFella just can't keep Little Wang down, Little Wang just keeps standing back up! GoodFella is getting frustrated. He kicks Little Wang on the head!"

Jim Jackson: "Arnold "GoodFella" Bold lifts his opponent up on his shoulders, runs and leaps to the top turnbuckle where corkscrews sending his opponent crashing to the mat head first executing a match ending Sleeping with the Fishes! GoodFella for the pin!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Little Wang has been eliminated!"

Brad Blood: "Finally, GoodFella eliminates Little Wang. Looks like Little Wang's partner Nao Fook Mi is up next looking to avenge her partner. Fook Mi charges in towards GoodFella!"

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi ducks under a big right hook, spins GoodFella around and kicks him in the guts. Fook Mi with a face buster... It connects! Fook Mi positions herself and leaps up into the air. STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Fook Mi for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "GoodFella kicks out! Fook Mi tries to grab GoodFella... GoodFella scampers away and tags in his partner! Felix Schwarz enters the ring... AND GETS FLOORED BY A SUPER KICK FROM FOOK MI! He got fooked right off the bat!"

Jim Jackson: "Back suplex by Fook Mi sends Schwarz crashing to the canvas! Felix Schwarz gets back to his feet. Enziguri by Fook Mi and down he goes again! Fook Mi climbs the top turnbuckle... She leaps..."

Brad Blood: "SENTON GOT INTERCEPTED BY SCHWARZ'S KNEES! Felix Schwarz lifts his knees at the last second saving himself from getting flattened. Felix Schwarz picks Fook Mi up on his shoulders."

Jim Jackson: "Body slam! Schwarz locks in a STF... Fook Mi reaches out... SHE GETS A TAG! Raven Connoly enters the ring! Raven Connoly stomps away at Schwarz! Raven hits a DDT planting Schwarz to the mat! Raven locks in an Argentine leg lock!"

Brad Blood: "GoodFella sneaks and breaks the hold with a double axe handle! Raven is not amused. She attacks GoodFella as the referee is sending him back to their corner."

Jim Jackson: "Raven just threw GoodFella over the top rope! She turns around... Right into Felix Schwarz's grasp... Schwarz attacks with rolling Germans! One! Two! Three! THREE GERMAN SUPLEXES!!! Schwarz for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Raven kicks out! Schwarz lifts Raven on his shoulders... Raven elbows her way free!"

Jim Jackson: "Raven with a spinning wheel kick connects! She Irish whips Schwarz to the ropes... Back body drop sends Schwarz crashing to the mat! Raven quickly locks in a crossface!"

Brad Blood: "Schwarz screams in pain but manages to get a hold on the ropes! Raven is forced to release her hold."

Jim Jackson: "Raven starts attacking with stiff chops to the chest of Felix Schwarz!"

Brad Blood: "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Schwarz counters with a European uppercut! Raven staggers. Felix Schwarz smashes his knees right into Raven's head! Schwarz for the tag! GoodFella & Schwarz sends Raven Connoly into the ropes with a double Irish whip. They charge towards Raven Connoly and takes her down with a double clothesline executing a Drive-by Shooting!"

Brad Blood: "This is bad for Raven! GoodFella hooks the leg!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Oh! Nice save by Fook Mi! The ref sends Fook Mi back to their corner. Raven seems out of it... GoodFella Irish whips Raven to the ropes... Lariat sends Raven down! GoodFella starts attacking Raven with a series of stomps! He tags in his partner Felix Schwarz enters the ring again!"

Jim Jackson: "Schwarz lifts Raven up on his shoulders! Raven holds on to the top rope and slips down! Schwarz with a clothesline but Raven ducks under it and leaps towards Nao Fook Mi's hands! Fook Mi with a springboard hurracanrana! Felix Schwarz is down! Nao Fook Mi leaps to the top of the turnbuckle, she somersaults over her opponent who rushes in towards her landing behind her opponent who spins around right into a deadly burst kick sending her opponent crashing to the corner executing a devastating Fook Mi Special!!! Fook Mi for the pin!"

Brad Blood: "GoodFella leaps in for the save... NO! RAVEN INTERCEPTS GOODFELLA WITH A SPEAR!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Felix Schwarz has been eliminated!"

Jim Jackson: "Team Marcus is two men down! Zombie still has to see action... Arnold "GoodFella" Bold looks to avenge his partner. GoodFella and Fook Mi charges at each other... DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!!! BOTH WRESTLERS ARE DOWN! The referee begins the ten count!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Brad Blood: "Looks like GoodFella is stirring first... Fook Mi is also starting to stir..."

Jack B. Nimble: "Four! Five! Six!"

Jim Jackson: "GoodFella is on his knees now. Fook Mi still looks a little dazed but is slowly crawling to TMOM's outstretched hands."

Jack B. Nimble: "Seven! Eight! Nine!"

Brad Blood: "Fook Mi leaps towards TMOM's hands but GoodFella grabs her legs and pulls her back!"

Jim Jackson: "Arnold "GoodFella" Bold lifts his opponent up on his shoulders, runs and leaps to the top turnbuckle where corkscrews sending his opponent crashing to the mat head first executing a match ending Sleeping with the Fishes! GoodFella hooks the legs!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Nao Fook Mi has been eliminated!"

Brad Blood: "Now it's even again! Raven enters the ring... She hits GoodFella with a couple of hard rights! GoodFella staggers around!"

Jim Jackson: "Atomic drop by Raven Connoly and GoodFella dances around the ring clutching his butt! Raven with a dropkick sends GoodFella down! Raven is on a roll! Russian leg sweep sends GoodFella back to the mat! Knee drop by Raven connects she hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "GoodFella kicks out! Raven Connoly grabs GoodFella's leg and locks in an ankle lock... GoodFella twists free and uses his legs to push Raven off balance!"

Jim Jackson: "Shoulder block by GoodFella sends Raven down! GoodFella lifts Raven up in a fireman's carry. Raven escapes with a couple of hard elbows! Raven throws a big right, dodged by GoodFella who hits a spinning back fist! GoodFella with a side walk slam... Raven hits the mat hard! GoodFella for the pin..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Raven kicks out! GoodFella drags Raven by the hair... He lifts Raven up and hits a delayed vertical suplex. Letting all the blood rush to Raven's head before slamming her down is a good move. GoodFella for the pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Raven gets a shoulder up! GoodFella Irish whips Raven to the ropes... Raven leaps over GoodFella who tried to do a back body drop attempt. She grabs GoodFella and rolls him over for the pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "GoodFella kicks out! GoodFella tries to throw a huge punch but Raven blocks it and counters with an uppercut! A spinning back elbow connects sending GoodFella staggering. Leg trip sends GoodFella down! Raven positions herself..."

Jim Jackson: "Slingshot catapult and GoodFella eats turnbuckle! Raven Connoly grabs Arnold "GoodFella" Bold and throws them into the turnbuckle, Raven Connoly runs towards Arnold "GoodFella" Bold, does a cartwheel jumping into the air and wrapping her legs around their head, Raven Connoly locks her legs around their head and pulls them to the mat locking in a koji clutch executing a 'Taste of Heaven' Arnold "GoodFella" Bold can not resist anymore and taps out!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Arnold "GoodFella" Bold has been eliminated!"

Brad Blood: "With that elimination, the advantage goes back to Team Eunice! But now, the wild card appears. Zombie enters the ring. Raven charges in... Zombie sidesteps and... ZOMBIE BITES INTO RAVEN'S NAPE!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Raven is screaming in pain! The ref tries to make Zombie stop! He begins counting."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three! Four..."

Brad Blood: "Zombie lets go... BUT IT LOOKS LIKE HE DREW BLOOD! Zombie wipes the blood on his lips with his fingers and starts licking them!"

Jim Jackson: "Raven tags in The Morbidly Obese Man! The big man makes his way to Zombie... The stare at each other... Zombie licks his lips... TMOM hits Zombie with a headbutt! Zombie unfazed retaliates with a headbutt of his own! TMOM again retaliates with a headbutt! Zombie shakes it off and retaliates with a headbutt again!"

Brad Blood: "Oh man, a testosterone battle with headbutts! Only in ULOL! Both men are still pummeling each other with headbutts... WAIT! Zombie breaks the headbutt battle with an eye rake! TMOM stumbles around blindly..."

Jim Jackson: "Zombie with a double axe handle from the second rope sends TMOM down to his knees! Zombie tries to attack with a W-chop... Blocked by TMOM! Irish whip by TMOM sends Zombie to the corner! TMOM comes charging in... Big body avalanche connects! TMOM sets Zombie up in the corner for a rocket launcher... Zombie crashes to the canvas hard! TMOM for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Zombie kicks out! TMOM grabs Zombie in a bear hug! He's gonna try and crush Zombie! WAIT!!! ZOMBIE BITES INTO TMOM'S NECK!!! OH MY GOD!!! HE RIPPED A CHUNK OF MEAT OFF TMOM'S NECK!!! IT THINK HE GOT A JUGULAR!!! TMOM IS SPURTING BLOOOOOD!!!"

Jim Jackson: "The referee stops Zombie from attacking as ULOL's resident doctor Dr. Booboo B. Gone rushes into the ring to take a look at TMOM! TMOM is bleeding all over the place! The doctor signals to the ref! TMOM cannot continue!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, The Morbidly Obese Man has been eliminated!"

Brad Blood: "EMTs have rushed to ringside and quickly try to stop the bleeding while escorting TMOM to the nearest hospital before he bleeds to death! Oh man! What a turn of events."

Jim Jackson: "Raven leaps into the ring, both teams are now down to their last wrestler. Raven charges in and attacks with quick kicks. The kicking combination keeps Zombie at bay... NO! Zombie catches Raven's leg!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie tries to bite into Raven's leg but Raven pulls her leg out just in the nick of time! Oh! Stiff discus clothesline by Zombie sends Raven down!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie picks Raven up... He nails a piledriver! Zombie grabs Raven Connoly by the ears and powerfully headbutts Raven Connoly executing Deadbutt! Raven is busted open! Raven slumps to the mat! This could be it! Zombie for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Raven has been eliminated! The winner of this match... TEAM MARCUS!"

Brad Blood: "TEAM MARCUS WON! TEAM MARCUS WON! EUNICE IS SOOOOOOOO SCREWED!!!"

"Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing as the general manager of ULOL Marcus Troy comes out from the back. Loud boos emanate from the crowd but Marcus merely ignores it and strolls to the ring. Lifting a mic to his lips, Marcus grins widely before speaking...

Marcus Troy: "Well well well... It seems that Mrs. Winslow's team has lost! Which mean, FINALLY!!!! FINALLY!!! I shall have full contr..."

'The Blood Of Cuchulainn'' begins to blast from the PA system as the IRA, King and Scott Logan, walk out onto the entrance ramp wearing trench coats and sunglasses. They are accompanied by Samantha Collins who is holding a microphone.

Samantha Collins: "Before you continue Mr. Troy, allow me first to congratulate your Team's victory. Next, I want to address a certain issue before the celebrations start. As you know, My husband Allister, holds a document that grants him a title shot for any title he wants within ULOL, the Boleto Dorado. And as many people know that the Boleto Dorado can be traded in anytime and any place."

The crowd erupts.

Samantha Collins: "I looked over that documents and I noticed something interesting about it. It never specified that the title must be a belt. So on behalf of Allister, We are using it on the title of General Manager."

A loud gasp is heard throughout the arena..

Brad Blood: "WAIT! Is that even possible?!"

Marcus Troy: "You can't be serious! The Boleto Dorada can't be used in..."

The color drains from Marcus Troy's face as he realizes the huge loophole in the rules of the Boleto Dorado.

Samantha Collins: "That's right, WE talked it over with Mrs. Winslow and the board of directors and guess what... WE CAN! Allister get down there and win us the title of General Manager!"

Allister King runs down to the ring, Zombie tries to stop him but Scott Logan takes Zombie down with a huge clothesline! Allister enters the ring.

Marcus Troy: "Wait! Stop! Stoooo...."

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell! The match has begun! Allister King grabs the opponent by the throat before lifting them in a gorilla press. Allister throws them in the air and catches them before slamming them violently into the mat with a widow maker executing The Overdose! Allister for the pin!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and NEW General Manager of ULOL... ALLISTER KING!"

Brad Blood: "Why the?! What the?! How the?!"

Jim Jackson: "OH MY GOD! ALLISTER KING HAS NOW BECOME THE NEW GENERAL MANAGER OF ULOL!"

Samantha Collins: "That's right, my husband Allister King is now the new GM of ULOL and the first rule he will make is to amend the Boleto Dorado that it can no longer be used to go after the titles of general manager and vice-general manager of ULOL! We have to protect our interests you know."

'The Blood Of Cuchulainn'' begins to blast from the PA system again and the IRA exits to the back as the crowd continues to stare on in shock on what has just occurred.

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Jim Jackson: "Ladies and gentlemen, our minds are still processing the events that just transpired here in ULOL..."

Brad Blood: "Why the?! What the?! How the?!"

Jim Jackson: "Certainly now, ULOL's future is certainly in the unknown. What will happen next now that Marcus Troy and Eunice P. Winslow are not the absolute authority? What will Allister King do as general manager? Well tune in next week to find out..."

Ay Basura! 02/27/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Ay Basura! 02/27/2011

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