Lucha Loco 02/17/2011

Subject: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Thu Feb 17, 2011 7:28 pm

Jim Jackson: "Good evening and welcome to another edition of Lucha Loco! We would like to apologize for the delay but it seems that Thursday Night Cockfighting went into overtime pushing us back a little."

Brad Blood: "But we're here, we're ready and we're going to give you all the wrestling action that you've been craving for. Hopefully we made it before you guys experienced wrestling withdrawal syndrome."

Jim Jackson: "That's right, we have a great card for you all tonight so without further ado... LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Backstage, the holy ground of wrestlers. A place where honorable warriors prepare for battle in the ring. Or so Musashi believes. However, as Stephanie Dawson has discovered, he is not there. She was hoping to get an interview with the new guy, but no matter where she looked, she could not find him. She is just about to give up and leave, when all of a sudden the ceiling caves in and a large sack of meat slams into the floor. Rattling off several curses, such as [expletive deleted], [expletive deleted], and [expletive deleted], Stephanie quickly makes her way to a safer part of the area, away from all the destruction. However, when the sack of meat turns out to be none other than Musashi Kuruma, she cautiously approaches the crash site again, wary of falling debris.

Musashi Kuruma: "Ugh...it just isn't the same as Mount Daisetsu..."

Stephanie Dawson: "Uh...Musashi, would you mind answering some questions?"

Musashi Kuruma: "I guess not. What do ya wanna ask me, miss-"

Musashi pauses when he sees who he's talking to. He feels a stirring in his loins, urging him on to say and do embarrassing things in a vain attempt to impress this woman who stands before him. But nay, his master long ago forbade such things, and Musashi must maintain control lest he become like he was before! Stephanie, in the meantime, tries to ignore the fact that he suddenly has a large nosebleed and is shaking with the effort of keeping his libido under control, and continues.

Stephanie Dawson: "Miss Dawson will be fine for now. Alright, to start, why exactly did you join us here at ULOL?"

Musashi Kuruma: "W-w-well, you see, I...I c-came here in s-search of the o-one who killed my m-master and leveled the...the t-temple. S-speaking of which, c-can I ask y-you a question?"

Stephanie Dawson: "Go ahead."

Musashi has regained his composure enough to speak without pausing and stuttering by this point, and pulls out some kind of object from his robe.

Musashi Kuruma: "Have you seen...this man!?"

Stephanie Dawson: "...That's a stick figure you cut out of a piece of paper and drew a face on."

Musashi puts the paper doll back where it was.

Musashi Kuruma: "Okay, I'll just take that as a 'no'."

Stephanie Dawson: "Well, can I ask you another question?"

Musashi scratches his shiny dome of a head.

Musashi Kuruma: "Um...yeah, I guess. What is it?"

Stephanie Dawson: "It'll be match time soon. Shouldn't you be getting ready?"

Musashi Kuruma: "That was today? Argh, I still have to change into my singlet!"

Musashi runs back to the locker room as fast as his chubby legs will carry him, leaving Stephanie to step to the side to avoid a chunk of falling concrete.

Stephanie Dawson(thinking to herself): "It's his fault for climbing around on the roof instead of being somewhere most sane people would spend their time. Maybe I should've saved the interview for after the match, with how little time we had. Oh, well, might as well go and tell the repair crew that there's a big hole in the roof..."

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Scene opens and we see the ULOL's resident couple, The British Hawk and Lady Bianca de Sade walking arm in arm on a cool valentines night. Lady B has a slight limp taken from her matches. The British Hawk looks fresh and relaxed.

The British Hawk: "What's the matter baby? You haven't spoke since we left. That's very unlike you."

Lady B nudges TBH in the chest and smirks.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "Im just thinking. Marcus keeps on saying that you owe him a favour. You know as you asked for a title shot. Also he gave you a job. I'm just worried about what this favour will be."

The British Hawk: "Hey you don't need to worry about that. I owe nothing to that scumbag. The fact that I'm bringing in cash and the fact that I haven't quit yet is my debt paid. Don't worry babe, we'll be fine. Now how's that leg of yours? Still aching?"

Lady B feels her leg.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "I reckon it'll be fine. I'll get used to these sort of things when I go up against people like Nao Fook Mi and Raven. It woulda been nice to win those matches but I'm a rookie after all."

The British Hawk: "Scorps' training will come into use someday, you just have to train more. Look at me for example. Former World Tag Team and Intercotinental Champion. I still have to train. Because there are always new styles of wrestling to be learnt and obviously more challenges to conquer."

They turn a corner and greet a few fans.

Lady Bianca de Sade:"Well what about your situation then? Your beef with Zombie? I mean you gotta be on guard because he won't take that British Slam lightly."

The British Hawk: "Zombie got what he deserves, but I'm not through. You can't go around killing the loyal fans who pay to see us. That British Slam was only warning shots fired. If he chooses to retaliate then let him retaliate. I'll give him more than a British Slam and a belt shove up the anus. Please let UJJ beat the shit out of him on Thursday."

TBH looks up and sees a kid. His gob wide open in shock at TBH's use of language.

The British Hawk: "Hey I said SHIP not the other word you thought you heard."

They walk on leaving the kid.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "It'll be best not to get involved babe. You don't want someone like Jack as an enemy. I mean you've just started wrestling properly. I don't wanna have to look after you day in and day out."

The British Hawk: "Oh cheers for that. Glad to see who'll be by my dose when I injure myself or something. Anyway, it's Valentine's Day. Do we really have to spend it talking about work?"

They turn into a long driveway and proceed to the front door of their house. TBH puts his arms around Lady B's waist.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "Well we don't have too. We could do something else."

Lady B leans in for a kiss which TBH obviously obliges too. He opens the front door.

The British Hawk: "Oh I like the sound of that. Last one upstairs has to give the winner a foot rub!"

Lady B pushes TBH back and rushes inside.

The British Hawk: "Dammit! Err 1-2-3 not included!!"

TBH rushes inside as closes the door. The picture fades in the shape of a love heart.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

A slow knock comes from the office door and it opens slowly. Zombie slowly waddles in with his hands on his buttocks. His eyes teary from a large object which was brutally shoved up his rear end. He wipes his eyes dry and goes to sit down but suddenly thinks better of it. Marcus Troy watches him.

Zombie: "I think ... I'll er ... stand."

Zombie looks at Troy for a while. Troy seems to show no remorse for his undead henchman.

Zombie: "I er ... brought you the ULOL Ligero Maximo championship belt that you've been looking for ... oooo damnit ... I shouldn't clench so much ... so uncomfortable ..."

He pulls at his buttocks and goes to sit down again but remembers why he was standing up. He stands up quickly before he sits down fully. He slams his fist on Marcus Troy's desk.

Zombie: "Arrrrgggh!! THAT BASTARD!!! I want a match with the little tosser once this ...."

Zombie points to his backside.

Zombie: "... is sorted!!"

Marcus Troy looks at Zombie then the belt stuck in his behind then back at Zombie again.

Marcus Troy: "I'm beginning to lose faith in you Zombie. First you let The British Hawk hit you with a British Slam, then you let Q shove the belt up your ass... Which I still cannot figure out why it hasn't been removed and cleaned yet! If you are getting pushed around by the likes of them then maybe I made a mistake hiring you."

Marcus takes a puff from the cigar he was enjoying prior to Zombie's arrival.

Marcus Troy: "I need you to reassure me that you are not just a waste of my resources Zombie. You have a match tonight... Take it as an opportunity to show me what you can really do. "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson is the partner of The Morbidly Obese Man, and they are currently the ULOL Campeónes Compañero Champions. If you say one of them gets injured and cannot defend the titles, I would have to strip it off of them..."

Marcus looks into Zombie's dead eyes and checks if the undead wrestler caught his drift.

Zombie sneers at Marcus Troy.

Zombie: "You want your belt? Here ..."

Zombie plunges his hand into his stomach. He rummages around his stomach and then delves down deeper into his groin area.

Zombie: "... take ..."

He carries on rummaging through his body parts. He then has a confused look on his face and pulls out a major organ. He plops his heart on Marcus Troy's desk.

Zombie: "That's not supposed to be down there!"

He puts his hand back into his insides and continues feeling around for the belt. His face lights up when he grabs onto something.

Zombie: "Here's your damn belt!"

Zombie pulls out the ULOL Ligero Maximo championship belt from his insides. It is dripping wet with stomach acid, puss, blood and feces. He drops it onto Troy's desk.

Zombie: "And the so called "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson WILL be stopped! So much so ... he will be called JACK Johnson! He will not get his title shot at Shogun. He will no longer be one half of the ULOL Campeónes Compañero Champions. And he will not walk out of that ring after tonight!"

Zombie angrily picks up his heart from Troy's desk and shoves it back in its right place.

Marcus Troy stares at the mess on his table then back at Zombie.

Marcus Troy: "Yes, you better make sure that YOU do not fail this time. Do not make me regret signing you to the roster. I want that Zombie I released to the crowd two weeks ago, am I understood?"

Marcus Troy looks at the belt on his desk. He presses a button in the intercom and screams into it.

Marcus Troy: "I NEED SOMEONE TO CLEAN UP THE LIGERO MAXIMO BELT! SOMEONE GET IN HERE NOW OR I'LL FIRE ALL YOUR ASSES!"

A few seconds later a knock is heard from the door and Bob Bobbie peeks through.

Bob Bobbie: "You rang boss?"

Marcus points to the Ligero Maximo belt.

Marcus Troy: "Get that belt sanitized and ready for the main event later. And get someone to clean my desk too while you are at it."

Bob Bobbie quickly scampers over like a scared hamster and picks up the soiled belt, trying not to gag, he quickly exits the office. Marcus Troy focuses his attention back at Zombie.

Marcus Troy: "So what are you still standing here for? Go earn your paycheck."

Zombie smirks as he quite literally pulls himself together.

Zombie: "You want the Zombie that slaughtered thousands of people?"

Zombie's voice turns sinister and he points at Marcus Troy.

Zombie: "You got him!"

He cracks his knuckles and makes his way out of Marcus Troy's office. Marcus Troy smiles and continues to puff on his cigar as the scene fades out.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jim Jackson: "Well tonight we are having a new wrestler debut, Musashi Kurama will be taking on The Masked Man, who we know almost nothing about."

Brad Blood: "What do you need to know? He's in a mask, he wrestles, 'nuff said!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, The Masked Man!"

My Apocalypse by Arch Enemy starts playing around the arena as The Masked Man makes his way down to the ring with a mic in hand

The Masked Man: "Musashi Kuruma? Really? This guy is my next opponent? He's a bloody buddhist! Hes going to find its going to be hard to get anywhere here in ULOL and I will show him that I'm a future champion here! Alright lets get this over with!"

The Masked Man drops the mic and waits for Musashi Kuruma to come to the ring for their match.

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for the evening, let us welcome Musashi Kuruma!"

"Dragon" by JAM Project plays as footage from an old Japanese anime runs on the ULOL Tron, and the lights go dim. Once the music starts to become more lively, the lights return to their normal brightness and Musashi runs enthusiastically to the ring, followed by a line of fireworks down both sides of the ramp, attempting (but failing miserably) to jump onto the mat through the ropes. Once he's disentangled himself, he goes (much more calmly this time) to his corner and offers up a quick prayer to Buddha.

Jim Jackson: "The two men have entered the squared circle. Will Kuruma be successful in his debut match tonight or shall he fall prey to The Masked Man?"

Brad Blood: "Man he's huge, but then again The Masked Man ain't really that small either."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for the match is Don Q. Hotte! LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell and right off the bat Musashi Kuruma charges in with a big forearm almost knocking all of his opponent's teeth in! The Masked Man quickly recovers and takes Kuruma down with a drop toe hold! The Masked Man continues to stomp away at the newcomer."

Brad Blood: "Kuruma is a glutton for punishment and just continues to take it during this match. The referee gets knocked around after catching a wild right hand from The Masked Man as Kuruma dodges and is down."

Jim Jackson: "Death valley driver by The Masked Man, Musashi Kuruma is down! The Masked Man hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Kuruma kicks out! Irish whip by The Masked Man sends the rookie to the turnbuckles."

Brad Blood: "The Masked Man charges in... Musashi Kurama avoids The Masked Man's avalanche by getting out of the damn way! The Masked Man hits the turnbuckles chest first! Ooh! That's gotta hurt."

Jim Jackson: "Kurama drives a thrust kick into the chest of The Masked Man. The Masked Man takes a quick lariat and is down! Musashi Kuruma goes for a cover..."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kick out by The Masked Man. The newbie is laying it on The Masked Man with those sumo palm strikes. I can see palm marks on The Masked Man's chest."

Jim Jackson: "Musashi Kuruma picks The Masked Man up... SITOUT CRUCIFIX POWERBOMB! Now that shook the ring! Kuruma hooks the leg, is this it?"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "The Masked Man denies Kuruma the win! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there."

Jim Jackson: "Headlock by Kuruma, The Masked Man pushes out of a Musashi Kurama hold. Kurama walks into a side slam. This time it's The Masked Man who hooks the leg."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kuruma kicks out! The Masked Man gets whipped into the corner by Kurama, who charges in with a clothesline. The Masked Man grabs the referee and pulls him in the way! OH!!! Referee gets smashed! The referee calls for the DQ as he collapses to the mat in pain."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match as a result of a disqualification, Musashi Kuruma!"

Jim Jackson: "Looks like Musashi Kuruma gets the victory here tonight. The Masked Man ain't happy and is throwing a tantrum... HE BLINDSIDES KURUMA! The Masked Man lifts his opponent onto his shoulders and slams him to the ground executing a Huntmaster Powerbomb! Kuruma is down! The Masked Man turns his attention at the ref who DQed him..."

Brad Blood: "Whoa! The ref barely escapes The Masked Man's grasp and flees the area."

Jim Jackson: "Talk about bad sportsmanship... The Masked Man shouldn't blame anyone but himself for his loss here tonight."

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Thu Feb 17, 2011 7:29 pm

Marcus Troy looks up from his desk, as Manolo Ferrer strides into his office. The manager has handled the business of many of wrestling's biggest names, guiding his clients to championships wherever they went.

Today, he seeks the General Manager in the name of the talents who have trusted him with their careers. He shakes hands with Marcus Troy, before presenting his case.

Manolo Ferrer: "Thank you for taking the time to see me. Mr. Morbidly Obese Man and Mr. Johnson caused a setback in my clients' title reign. I am not here to complain about that; they were the better team on that show. I am here to inform you that my clients are using their rematch clause, and would like to challenge Mr. Morbidly Obese Man and Mr. Johnson for the Campeónes Compañero as soon as possible."

Mr. Ferrer pauses for a moment.

Manolo Ferrer: "I understand the rematch may take time to happen, but if it is possible, I would like to have it on the February 17 show. I am aware Mr. Johnson has a match already scheduled for that date, but I am sure he would not mind having the...distinction...of being one of the very few to do two matches for ULOL, defending his championship and gunning for a title shot all on the same night. You probably would like to see if he's really good enough to be Shogun's next challenger, so adding the rematch to the schedule would really be win-win for everyone."

Mr. Ferrer pauses again.

Manolo Ferrer: "I can imagine Mr. Johnson's partner would be less than pleased if the rematch did happen so soon. But that comes with defending a championship in the first place. I'm sure our current Campeónes Compañero are aware of that, and it's not because Mr. Morbidly Obese sees Mr. Johnson as someone riding his flabby coattails to get a title. At least, that's what the dirtsheets say. Anyway, this is my clients' request. We are ready to challenge as soon as a date is set."

Marcus Troy thinks it over.

Marcus Troy stares at the legendary manager of champions. He leans back on his chair casually showing that he is not intimidated by the larger than life figure.

Marcus Troy: "Mr. Ferrer, believe me when I say that I would like to book your clients in a rematch to take away the Campeónes Compañero titles away from Morbidly Unstoppable, yet at this late in the show, there is little I can do. What I promise you is that next week, you shall have the rematch you and your clients are yearning for. Of course I would ask a favor from you in return. Quid pro quo Mr. Ferrer."

Marcus leans forward his eyes staring directly into Manolo Ferrer's.

Marcus Troy: "It would be a shame if "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson loses his match to Zombie tonight. I'm sure you agree with me in hoping for his loss."

The barest hint of a smirk crosses the face of Manolo Ferrer.

Manolo Ferrer: "It would be a pity if something heinous was to happen to Mr. Johnson. I'm not saying it would, but he's fighting something...well, what else do you call a zombie? I think we can work with the title rematch schedule you're proposing. So I will be on my way."

The manager gets up, and heads out. He then pauses at the door, turning to face the camera.

Manolo Ferrer: "Mr. Jack Johnson, I'm sure you're paying attention to what Mr. Troy and I have been discussing. If I were you, I'd pay more attention to making sure that zombie doesn't munch on you. At least with my clients, you know we're only interested in beating you, not having your meat as an entree."

And with that, Manolo Ferrer takes his leave.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

MEANWHILE IN THE IRA LOCKER ROOM!!!

Allister and Scott are sitting at a table drinking, no surprise there.

Allister King: "Hey Scott, Look at those pricks. Who do they think they are us? Get a life a stupid turd pusher and stop copying us. We were here first and there is nothing you can do about it."

Scott Logan: "Dude that's a feckin' mirror."

Allister King: "Why did hell did you have to point that out? Now I need to drink to forget that moment."

Scott Logan: "Sure, that's why ya drink. Not the fact that we are alcoholics from Ireland who seem to fill out all the things that makes us stereotypes?"

Allister King: "Ya see mate, that's where yer wrong. Irish stereotypes are ginger, 3 foot tall leprechauns who jump about lucky for pot."

Scott Logan: "Ya mean a pot of gold you drunk bastard. Don't forget that there is 3 different Irish stereotypes. The leprechaun which we are not. The extremely violent pricks who just wanna fight. And the third, which we are, Drunk Irish fools and can make a limerick better than they can spell their name."

Allister King: "Speak for yourself laddie, A L C O H O L, Allister. See I'm not that stupid."

Scott Logan: "Ya just spelled alcohol ya idiot. That just proves how much of a feckin' alco ya are"

Allister King: "Leave me alone I'm home sick."

Scott Logan: "How can ya be home sick we were in Ireland last week."

Allister King: "Yeah but I couldn't find my house."

Scott: We were in Dublin!! Your FECKIN' house is in BELFAST!! serious dude lay off the booze for awhile.

Allister stands up knocking his chair over and points at Scott angrily

Allister King: "BLASPHEMY!!"

Scott looks a bit depressed

Scott Logan: "You're right mate, that was uncalled for. Let's have a drink and forget it ever happened."

Allister King: "Of course, where's the drink?"

Allister and Scott look around frantically

Scott Logan& Allister King: "We're out of feckin' Drink!"!

Alllister turns around

Allister King: "It was those bastards!!"

Allister runs into the mirror, Breaking it and knocking himself out.

Scott Logan: "That's the mirror again mate. Oh here's the drink, it was under the table."

Scott looks at the unconscious Allister

Scott Logan: "Meh, more for me."
Scott sits down and continues to drink as the camera fades to a picture of a granny licking a monkey's ass.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

IT'S MEGA YUMMY!

IT'S MEGA MUSKY!

IT'S...

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Megapu10

IN STORES NOW!

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

'Rebirthing' by Skillet starts blaring over the arena. The fans give a loud roar of cheers as The British Hawk rises from beneath the stage. He is wearing his trademark hoodie and his wrestling gear. He makes his way towards the ring, slapping the hands of screaming fans. He enters the ring and picks up the mic. He climbs the turnbuckle and raises his arms. He climbs down and speaks as the music dies down.

The British Hawk: "Hey there everybody! I'm out here as per usual to entertain you guys for a few minutes. But this time it's different! Oh yes. This time I'll be giving out an award!"

The British Hawk reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out a poorly made medal. The medal is made from paper while the string is a thin and worn out.

The British Hawk: "This award is what I like to call 'The Dumbass Of The Week' award! Yes, this award is even more prestigious then Q's very own title. Even more prestigous than the Primo Ultimo Championship! This award doesn't involve wrestling. It involves someone making themselves look stupid or someone said something really stupid that can either offend people in two ways! The 1st way is that they took a shot at someone, preferably me! Or they tried to be like me and be funny but FAIL miserably. Now I have 3 contenders for this award. They are as follows:

Firstly, Alexander Conway! He has been nominated for taking a shot at me! Saying that my jokes aren't funny! Ouch Conway. Man that hurts inside. Anyway. Secondly I present Zombie! He is just a Dumbass period. Siding with Troy, killing fans and having a title stuck up his ass. Hmm I'll be sure to bring a large bottle of Dettol to the ring later on. Finally the 3rd candidate is Brostar! Not only did he fail at being funny, he also took a shot at not only me but the rest of the competitors in the gauntlet match. Also he just looks like a dumbass!"

The fans chuckle and cheer at the contenders.

The British Hawk: "The winner is.... BROSTAR! Now don't worry people, Brostar really this time deserve a highly prestigious title. Now I didn't pick Zombie because he's already gonna get dismantled by UJJ tonight and I didn't pick Alexander Conway because that'll give him something else to whine about. I picked Brostar because I can deal with him in the match. Now where is Brostar to come and collect this award! Nope not here oh well."

TBH lobs the medal into the crowd.

The British Hawk:"Now onto serious business. Tonight I get another chance at winning the Ligero Maximo Championship. For I am participating in gauntlet challenge. Guess who's coming out 1st? Me. Yeah, Marcus tried to scare me by saying I was going to enter first. Didn't work though. I don't mind entering 1st. It allows me to prove that I can outlast the other opponents and make my victory, should I win, more sweeter."

The fans cheer.

The British Hawk: "Oh I forgot to ask. Men, put your hands up if you got lucky on Valentine's day? When I say lucky, I mean who got proper lucky?"

The men start cheering as they all raise their hands as does TBH.

Yeah now how many of you are lying? Hehe I'm kidding. I got lucky. Well at least I did after the damn footrub. I honestly don't see how someone tickling your feet gets you relaxed and horny. I just don't."

The fans chuckle and cheer once more. TBH walks over to a ring technician who speaks to him.

The British Hawk: "Oh dear, they are kicking me out so I'll make this quick. Me. Kick Brostar's Ass. Win The Title. Spray it with Dettol. Party. Have sex. Thank you and see ya later folks!"

'Rebirthing' by Skillet resumes playing as TBH rolls out of the ring, dropping the mic in then process as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

"Life is Beautiful" by Sixx AM blares throughtout the arena and when the lyrics start to play Ray Kamaura makes his way to the ring very slowly. But he has a Steer with him.

Ray Kamaura: "I bet you are all wondering why I'm out here with this poor animal? Well we will hit on that topic later. First I have a little surprise for Marcus and his wannabe Legion of Doom."

Ray ties the steer to the ring post and gives it a carrot.

Ray Kamaura: "I brought this steer out here to prove a point. Now Marcus and the rest of his super pals are trying control the game. Congrats to the Age of Suck on winning and losing the tag titles. OH TOO SOON! But tonight I have a present. I'm going to give this steer to the Pagan God so he can offer it to his "Darkness". No wait Ill give it to The Age of Suck so they can have a good manager. No I'm gonna give it to TMOM for a snack. Or Maybe give UJJ the steer to compliment his queer."

Ray pauses to let a worker take the steer backstage.

Ray Kamaura: "Now that its over with I think I'll tell you what I came out here for. Introducing my new tag team partner."

Ray waits for his partner.

"The Song of Storms" metal cover by Artificial Fear emanates out of the speakers as Leon Hinomoto makes his way to the ring across the foggy ground. Once in the ring, he tosses his hat aside as usual, but decides to keep his coat on. He then starts giving an enthusiastic speech to the crowd.

Leon Hinomoto: "On this day, mere weeks after my debut match here at ULOL, we have chosen to announce a new front. A new obstacle for our opponents. A new tag team partnership that will, and I say this with the highest amount of modesty and confidence I can muster, relinquish and lay claim to the Campeónes Compañero."

The crowd bursts into a large uproar in response to the rare cockiness of Leon that his short speech displays.

Leon Hinomoto: "From this day forth, the DWMA will begin its rise!"

Leon calms down to allow Ray to speak.

Ray Kamaura: "Like my partner says we are the DWMA and tonight we issue an open challenge to any team in the ULOL."

Ray drops the mic and gets ready for the match.

Oriental music starts playing on the background as smoke covers the mouth of the entrance tunnel. Suddenly out leaps Nao Fook Mi wearing a short cheongsam. Little Wang pops up from in between her legs. They stop at the top of the entrance ramp, Nao Fook Mi lifts a mic up to her lips and speaks.

Nao Fook Mi: "Well I guess me and my partner are up for the challenge. You think you have what it takes to take us? Let's get it on big man. I'm sure my partner and I are ready for a little warm up before our gauntlet match later."

With that Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi rush down the ramp and into the ring.

Jim Jackson: "Well this is surprising, we seem to have a new tag team here in ULOL. The DWMA, Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura newly formed have thrown an open challenge, and surprisingly a team that has accepted is the team of Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi! We have experience against power. Oriental Spices which have superior tag experience takes on the power team of The DWMA."

Brad Blood: "Yes, this match will probably be a toss-up, if The DWMA manages to get a lucky hit in, they may win this, it's power against speed tonight."

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Leonhi10

&

VS

&

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a tag match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first the team of Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi, Oriental Spices!"

Jim Jackson: "If I understand correctly Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi have been training together since they were children. Their team work is impeccable."

Brad Blood: "Team work may be important but it won't amount to nothing if a tag doesn't take place, that's what The DWMA should do."

Jasmine Lee: "And their opponents for tonight, the team of Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura, The DWMA!"

Jim Jackson: "This will be The DWMA's first time to fight as a team, their debut match, if they are able to beat Oriental Spices, they will be a big threat in the tag division."

Brad Blood: "Don't forget, both members of Oriental Spices have"

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACT BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Looks like it's Little Wang and Leon Hinomoto starting things off. And there's the bell! a leg tackle by Little Wang on The Rainman. Leon Hinomoto falls to one knee... Shining wizard! Cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Leon Hinomoto kicks out from under Wang. The Rainman tries to grab Little Wang but Little Wang slips through between his legs bouncing off the ropes..."

Jim Jackson: "Springboard hurrancarana! Leon Hinomoto gets sent tumbling forward! Before Little Wang can continue his assault The Rainman rolls away and tags in his partner Ray Kamaura!"

Brad Blood: "The big man enters the ring. Little Wang ignores Nao Fook Mi's call for a tag. Little Wang bounces off the ropes gaining momentum, the slips under Ray Kamaura and bounces off the opposite ropes... Little one is one slippery little prick."

Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura whips around but again Little Wang zooms past him and bounces again on the opposite ropes gaining more force! Little Wang is zooming towards Kamaura like a little cannonball..."

PUNT!!!

Brad Blood: "HOLY CRAP! LITTLE WANG JUST GOT PUNTED BY RAY KAMAURA OVER THE TOP ROPE, OVER THE STEEL RAILINGS AND OVER THE CROWD ALL THE WAY TO THE BACK!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Everyone is staring in shock at what just happened. Little Wang recovers and starts to run back to the ring! The referee begins the ten count!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven!"

Brad Blood: "Little Wang makes it to the front row. He tries to climb over the steel railings with much difficulty!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Eight! Nine!"

Jim Jackson: "Little Wang makes it to the ring apron!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Ten!"

Brad Blood: "The referee is calling for the bell! Little Wang didn't make it in time!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via count out... Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura, The DWMA!"

Jim Jackson: "And just like that The DWMA wins their first match as a team. Little Wang looks like he's apologizing profusely at his partner Nao Fook Mi. Fook Mi seems to wave it off."

Brad Blood: "Well I certainly didn't see that one coming. If Kamaura joined the NFL, he would kick-ass... The DWMA remains in the ring celebrating their victory."

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Thu Feb 17, 2011 7:30 pm

A look of smugness is seen on the face of the behemoth also known as The Morbidly Obese Man as he sits in the locker room with one of the ULOL Campeónes Compañero titles draped upon his shoulders. The camera pans out and we see he is joined by his tag team partner "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson in the room.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Well we did it again Johnson. We showed those losers in The Age of Pathetic that even with their numbers they cannot beat us. That their first victory was just a fluke. It's great to have these babies back in our possession."

The big wrestler runs his hand up and down the face of the belt on his shoulder. He gives is a few pats before continuing.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "I bet they are mightily pissed right now. I wouldn't be surprised if they will try something to get back at us. Maybe even interfere in your match with Zombie tonight. But don'tcha worry partner, I got your back tonight. If any member of The Age of Pathetic decides to show their face, I'll give them a good smacking."

UJJ cracks a small smile.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Yes I must admit that it did feel good beating the living shit out of Schwarz and Goodfella. Also getting the title back was an added bonus. But it doesn't stop there Lard Ass, we took advantage of our rematch clause by using it early. We have to be ready to fight. Even if it means they cash it in tonight."

UJJ taps his title which lays over his shoulder.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Soon, I err we will become the most dominant force in ULOL history. I take out Zombie tonight, and then become the Primo Ultimo Champion the following week. Its all coming together TMOM. Its all coming together."

TMOM nods and stands up, he walks towards UJJ and stops right in front of his partner.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Of course being partners... You should give me first dibs if ever you win the Primo Ultimo title... I mean, I will be there to help you win it..."

The big wrestler grins as UJJ stares back at him on a little miffed and a little amused as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Have you always wanted a pet but cannot afford one?

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WELL TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY!

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Freeca10

HERE AT FREE CAT INC. WE WILL SOLVE ALL THOSE PESKY LITTLE ISSUES YOU HAVE! OWN A PET NOW HASSLE FREE! NO NEED TO FEED IT, NO NEED TO WALK IT! NO NEED TO WORRY ABOUT ANYTHING! SO CALL NOW AT 1-800-FREE-CAT! AND WE'LL DELIVER YOUR VERY OWN FREE CAT RIGHT TO YOUR DOORSTEP FOR FREE!!!

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Scene opens inside the ULOL interview area, backstage. The ULOL resident interviewer, Stephanie Dawson, looks at the camera. Her face is highlighted with her silky blond hair and her warm smile. She raises her mic and begins to speak.

Stephanie Dawson: "Ladies and Gentlemen, my guest at this time, 'Unstoppable' Jack Johnson!"

The camera zooms out, revealing the huge powerhouse that is UJJ. Over his shoulder hangs his regained tag title.

Stephanie Dawson: "Thanks for joining us Jack. In a few moments, you are supposed to go one on one against Zombie in a hardcore match. This match is very important as if you come out on top, you will earn number one contendership status against Shogun the Primo Ultimo Champion."

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "You are correct Stephanie, but it's not a matter of if I defeat Zombie, it's a matter of when I defeat him. I don't want to sound like a broken record but I am the one to dethrone Shogun. I can see it. Everyone else can see it but most off all, he can see it."

Stephanie Dawson: "You came up short in your last number one contender's match and you ended up getting shot whilst Ray Kamura went on to lose against Shogun.-"

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "And look where he is now, eh? He went from main eventing shows to opening them. Oh how the mighty have fallen. But you see the difference between me and him is that I'll actually win against Shogun. Making me the first ever double champion."

Stephanie Dawson: "Ok, Marcus also said that it will be a shame if you were to lose against Zombie tonight, in a conversation with Manolo Ferrer, what do you think about that."

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "All I can say is that if the 'big bad scary Age of Pain' even step out into ring when I'm in there I'll treat them as another other opponent, no dq means no rules so I know I'll have fun beating Zombie and then annihilating the Age of Pain."

UJJ leaves out if view then shouts down the hall.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Oh and thanks for the card on Monday. It's got a special place next to whether my other thousands are."

Stephanie Dawson: "Hey I sent one to the entire roster!"

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "That's not what Lard Ass said."

UJJ turns towards the entrance area as the scene fades.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

The scene started with an animal hunter and a camera man scouting around for something and he suddenly stops and speaks to the camera

Mike Garvan: "Hello mates, I'm Mike Garvan and I am an animal hunter and I was told by someone that there is a HUGE creature in this arena and he might be right. Look at that thing! Isn't he a wonder of nature?"

The camera zooms to what the animal hunter is talking about, it's The Morbidly Obese Man. Mike Garvan looks fascinated on what Morbidly Obese Man is doing as he continues to speak.

Mike Garvan: "My gawd, this animal is destroying the buffet table and he is tearing everything apart and as you can see, it's the most disgusting yet most beautiful thing that I have ever seen. Observing this monstrosity in his natural habitat, how often do we get to do that? Now we're going to take a closer look and maybe even subdue this thing."

Mike Garvan walks slowly and closer to The Morbidly Obese Man, sneaking up on the occupied wrestler. He turns around and grabs TMOM as he tries to tackle the big man down.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "What the hell?!"

The last thing any sane man would do is to interrupt the mammoth of a wrestler also known as The Morbidly Obese Man while he's feasting. The big wrestler takes by surprise tries to shake off the man who jumped him.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Whoever you are, you just made your biggest mistake. I am going to maim you so bad then I'm gonna kill you once I get my hands on you."

The Morbidly Obese Man swings around and smashes into the buffet table along with Mike Garvan who somehow still manages to maintain his grip thanks to his crocodile wrestling skills. The two men continue to out-wrestle each other for a long while and The Morbidly Obese Man does not realize that the match of his partner "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson is about to begin.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is a hardcore match scheduled for one fall! Making his way to the ring, here is Zombie!"

"Creeping Death" by Metallica plays as Zombie slowly walks out. Zombie strolls down to the ring and steps into the ring.

Jim Jackson: "In one night, Zombie assured himself a spot beside the names of some of the most brutal killers in history. There's really not much else to say about what he's done."

Brad Blood: "He made a lot of people cry. And saddled Marcus Troy with a humongous cleaning bill to get all the stains out."

Jim Jackson: "Will you cut that out!? There's nothing to make light of what Zombie did!"

Jasmine Lee: "His opponent! One half of the reigning Compadre Companero! Here is "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson! If Jack Johnson wins this match, he becomes the number one contender for the Primo Ultimo title!"

"Papercut" by Linkin Park blasts over the arena as "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson enters the stage through a spark shower. He makes his way to the ring. He enters the ring and climbs a turnbuckle, scouting the entire arena.

Jim Jackson: "UJJ is pumped at the chance of winning a title shot for the biggest prize in ULOL."

Brad Blood: "As he should be. But Johnson's gotta have a game plan other than trying to flatten his opponent with brute force. Zombie's got a certified mass murder count to his name. How can Jack Johnson even slow down a zombie?"

Jasmine Lee: "Your official in charge is Don Q. Hotte. And now...LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Jasmine's barely finished saying those words, and Zombie charges right at UJJ! Only to crash into the corner! Johnson takes the opportunity to pepper Zombie with hard strikes! He's grabbing Zombie...hard Irish whip into the opposite corner! UJJ grabs a steel chair."

Brad Blood: "Zombie bounces off the corner, and Johnson slingshots fires off the ropes holding the chair up ready to strike! But Zombie getting right back up!"

Jim Jackson: "And Jack Johnson slams the chair right at his face! He's got Zombie...doctor bomb! UJJ has him pinned!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One!"

Jim Jackson: "But Zombie kicks out! Johnson kicks him in the head again! Grabbing Zombie from behind...German suplex right on top a garbage can! He's bridging for the pin!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie again kicks out! Jack Johnson busting out the big moves in quick succession! Bends Zombie over...flips him over for an underhook powerbomb!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie kicks out again! UJJ grabs a bat and lets Zombie have it! Oh! Right at the skull!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie dragged to his feet by Johnson. Johnson sends him into the corner! Crashes into Zombie with an avalanche! Now he's trying to powerbomb Zombie out of the ring and right into a shopping cart!"

Brad Blood: "That's gonna leave a REALLY messy spot if he hits!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie counters it and back bodydrops UJJ over the ropes! Johnson lands hard on the shopping cart instead!"

Brad Blood: "And Zombie just takes a couple of moments to recover, before chasing Johnson! He took all that offense, and it only took him a few moments to get back to his feet!"

Jim Jackson: "He boots UJJ in the face! He's...trying to claw UJJ's face off with his bare hands! He shoves Johnson into the ring apron! Zombie lifts the steel steps and whacks UJJ on the head with it! Johnson crumples to the floor! And he pushes Johnson back in the ring!"

Brad Blood: "Jack Johnson manages to meet Zombie at the ropes!"

Jim Jackson: "Johnson staggering Zombie with solid punches! But Zombie shoves him off! UJJ LUNGES AT ZOMBIE AND MISSES!"

Brad Blood: "He was trying to nail Zombie while he was in between the ropes, but Zombie got out of the way! Good thing the floor broke Johnson's fall!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie...laughs at Jack Johnson! He goes after him!"

Brad Blood: "Full nelson slam BOUNCES Johnson off the floor! And he's trying to claw Johnson's face off again!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie shouting as he tries to dig his fingers into Jack Johnson's face! UJJ tries to fight him off, but Zombie drills him in the head with a forearm!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie just wrenches the camera away from the cameraman... And slams it into Johnson's midsection!"

Jim Jackson: "Johnson's yanked to his feet...and rams him again into the ring apron! Pushes UJJ back in the ring! Zombie goes in after him...and hits a bodyslam! Kneedrop to the head of UJJ! And again Zombie tries to rip Jack Johnson's face off!"

Brad Blood: "Don Q. Hotte warning Zombie he'd disqualify him, but does he REALLY wanna do that?"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie clutching Jack Johnson in a chinlock, and Johnson can smell Zombie's breath on him as he tries to remain conscious! Zombie yelling at Johnson to give it up, even as Johnson tries to wiggle to a position where he can fight from!"

Brad Blood: "Which didn't take long. Johnson's already managed to get to one knee!"

Jim Jackson: "But Zombie anticipates UJJ's next move, by punching him in the face! Johnson's blinded!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie setting up for his big move!"

Jim Jackson: "But JOHNSON JUMPS UP AND DRILLS ZOMBIE WITH A JKO!"

Brad Blood: "HE JUST PULLED THAT OUTTA HIS ASS!"

Jim Jackson: "And it's taken Zombie down! Jack Johnson trying to recover, but Zombie is still prone on the mat!"

Brad Blood: "Zombies don't stay still for very long!"

Jim Jackson: "Wait! Manolo Ferrer is leading the Age of Pain to the ring! Jack Johnson's odds appear to have soured on him!"

Brad Blood: "No surprise they'll have a lot of interest in this match, Jim! And Don Q. Hotte is quick to go out and warn the Age of Pain to go back to the locker room!"

Jim Jackson: "Manolo Ferrer is trying to smooth-talk the referee, even as UJJ flips him the bird what the?"

Brad Blood: "Who is that?"

Jim Jackson: "Someone jumped the rail and got in the ring! He JUST TAZERED JACK JOHNSON!"

Brad Blood: "JOHNSON IS TWITCHING ON THE MAT! Waitasec I know that guy!"

Jim Jackson: "The guy's bailing out of the ring! Zombie has UJJ...DEADBUTT! Johnson falls lifeless to the mat!"

Brad Blood: "That guy! It's the same staffer Jack Johnson speared half to death a few months ago! And NOW the Age of Pain are backing away! The ref sees the pin!"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ's twitching helplessly under Zombie!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "THE MORBIDLY OBESE MAN IS CHARGING DOWN TOWARDS THE AGE OF PAIN! HE JUST RAN OVER THEM LIKE THEY'RE BOWLING PINS! HE'S ON THE WARPATH! TMOM enters the ring and attacks Zombie!"

Brad Blood: "Tubby's gonna have his hands full with the Age of Pain and Zombie!"

Jim Jackson: "Zombie's licking his lips at the prone Jack Johnson! Forget about TMOM with his hands full of the Age of Pain! He may need to look for a new tag partner!"

Brad Blood: "Zombie's getting giddy! He's gonna eat Johnson's meat!"

Jim Jackson: "TMOM can't get past the Age of Pain! Zombie gives the official one hungry look, and Don Q. Hotte is getting outta there!"

Brad Blood: "WHAT THE"

Suddenly, Jim and Brad are shoved to the floor when their table flips over, as the person hiding under it hurriedly slides into the ring.

Brad Blood: "Q!?!?!?!?"

Jim Jackson: "Q?!?!?! HOW!?!?!?"

Brad Blood: "Zombie spots him! Q ducks him! He's got Zombie off-balance!"

Jim Jackson: "HE JUST TOSSED ZOMBIE RIGHT ON TOP OF THE AGE OF PAIN!"

Brad Blood: "And now he's bailing outta the ring! Security's after him!"

Jim Jackson: "Q just trampled on Zombie while making his getaway! He's outrunning them! Ducks the guards, and he's...outta here!"

Brad Blood: "He was...HE'S BEEN SITTING UNDER OUR TABLE THE WHOLE TIME, AND WE DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT IT!?"

Jim Jackson: "UJJ drags Zombie back into the ring, he pins Zombie!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match and new number one contender for the Primo Ultimo title, "Unstoppble" Jack Johnson!"

Brad Blood: "Talk about one helluva clusterfuck. WHOA! The Age of Pain and Zombie are overpowering TMOM and UJJ! They are being beaten to a pulp! UJJ may have won a title shot but will he be in condition to win it when he faces Shogun?"

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Thu Feb 17, 2011 7:30 pm

The stadium is full of people. Most wear clothes that have some combination of bright red, yellow, neon, white, orange, pink and any other bright colors. But the rainbow of festive colors contrast sharply with the anguished faces that wear them.

Despite the massive attendance, almost everyone speaks in low whispers, punctuated with the cries and sobs of mourning. Many carry pictures of faces, smiling, saluting, dressed up for big moments in their lives.

A few news crews are seen in the sea of colors.

Reporter: "It wasn't that long ago when this stadium, the largest in the country, was where these people had gathered to mourn for the loved ones they had lost in their war against the Smurfs. Now, this place again becomes a place for this nation's people to share their grief, over the tragedy that took away their loved ones who went to watch a wrestling show. When they have funeral services, it is in their culture to wear very colorful clothes, to celebrate the life the departed led. But the circumstances that have led to all this grief have sorely...something is going on over there."

A commotion in the crowd distracts the reporter. And as the camera locks in on what is happening, the reporter's voice becomes strained with excitement.

Reporter: "It's him. It's him."

It is indeed him. The people reach out, hoping even the tip of their fingers can briefly caress him. He is none other than the audacious avatar of his nation, the man known to the whole world only as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

He walks slowly through the crowd of mourners, trying to reach out to as many of his countrymen as possible. The masked man himself wears his people's colors of mourning. The reporter tries to reach him, but there are just too many people.

He eventually makes his way to a stage that has been set up at one end of the stadium. The stage itself has several piles of brightly colored boxes of different sizes. They look like presents.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [Hello, my preciously persevering countrymen!]

They roar for him.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [I promised myself I would not return to the tender soil of our humble homeland, until I was able to bring back our people for the rest that they deserve! I am forever in debt to the kind help given by so many people, who have worked to make sure our kin are brought back home!]

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points to the stacks of colorful boxes on the stage.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [Even if it is just an arm, a leg, or a half eaten buttcheek! We have brought back the loved ones you have lost! You will be reunited with them today!]

Heartfelt expressions of thanks mix with heartwrenching cries of sadness, as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's people offer their thanks. Volunteers begin carrying trays full of the boxed remains of their countrymen, as the relatives of the deceased and devoured line up to receive them.

Mourner: [My sister was a big girl....all that's left of her now fits a....lunchbox!]

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [That Inhuman Ungeneral Manager waste of his dog-mother's semen keeps saying we brought this on ourselves! He willingly brought in a monster, because he never cared if the fans were happy OR alive! Marcus Troy is happy to kill off a nation, plant burning crosses, and park in our handicapped spot! Because Marcus Troy thinks we don't matter! Just like the Primo vanilla cookie cutter McSatan's thinks we don't matter!]

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing animatedly paces the stage.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [But the darkness isn't coming from the most generic devil worshiping franchise in the neighborhood! It's coming from that zombie who turned our people into an all you can eat Buffalo wings buffet! Bad enough you wanted to be a Hitler, Marcus Troy! But you wanted to become a George Dubya Bush too! Just so you can show everyone your diarrheic sense of judgment!]

The crowd as one vengefully shouts MARCUS! HITLER! DICTADOR! ANO! for several long, bloodcurdling moments.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [I am not going to ask WHY a zombie needs to look for work! But you decided to try and exterminate the wrong race! The zombie's hunger and that son of his mother Ungeneral Manager's raging brain fart of hatred will not destroy us! If anything, it will only make us grow harder! The righteous sodomy I have done to you with the Ligero Maximo is but a sliver of the suffering you chose to do to my people, you zombie! But that just means I will have to keep trying harder, until there isn't a shred of you or Marcus Troy left to sodomize!]

The crowd hurls more insults, even as they receive their loved ones in packages that could be mistaken for fastfood takeout.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: [WE HAVE SURVIVED THE ZOMBIE SMURF APOCALYPSE! WE WILL SURVIVE YOU!]

The mourners raise pitchforks and burning torches as obscenities directed at Marcus Troy, Zombie, Shogun and just about anyone allied with the ULOL General Manager echo throughout the stadium. Many raised hands carry the multicolored packages that contain their departed countrymen, as a pledge of justice that will not be denied.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

The scene opens with Brostar sitting on a chair taping the wrists, he spots the camera there so he stops and begins to speak.

Brostar: "Oh! You're here, well that's quite interesting because I was about to go out to the ring and say some words."

He says as he finishes taping his wrists and puts the tap wheel that began putting his Black elbow pads on.

Brostar: "So tonight is my chance to have some gold round my waist. It has been six months since I had my last Title which was in my last federation Wrestling Havoc Worldwide which I was the first and final Hardcore Championship and speaking of the title I have it right here."

Brostar finishes putting his black elbow pads on and opened up his suitcase and pulls out the WHW Hardcore Belt.

Brostar: "This is the belt, you see I always keep it not only because I was the last one to be the champion but I keep it to remind me someday I will be champion again, and to night I will win the Ligero Maximo Championship match and in the match I will not only show the high-flying side of me but I will so a side that no one has ever seen before."

Brostar puts the belt back into the suitcase then begins to puts his black knee pads on as he continues to speak.

Brostar: "Now on to Shadow, I had people e-mailing me, asking me on facebook and in-person asking me why hasn't Shadow been the evil despicable person that he had been during in his debut. Well even for me I'm not quite sure he had said nothing to me the past week and it may be about Stank Lord or some personal issues I'm not sure."

Brostar, stops for a moment to put some tape on his feet then continues.

Brostar: "Speaking of Stank Lord, umm...People maybe wondering why he is trying to ally himself with me instead of trying to get his revenge on me. Well during the past week before he returned I did talk to him and we talked things out we are all fine so he is alright to be partners with me again."

Brostar drops the tape to put black socks and boots on.

Brostar: "Now back onto my match lets talk about my opponents. Firstly, Little Wang. Haha! They have to be kidding letting some little midget wrestle in which doesn't fit him he should go back to midget wrestling in a Federation I do not care. As all I know he isn't going to last a second with anyone in that ring."

Brostar: "Secondly, Lucian Blackheart. Well you can already tell this guy isn't going to win he is full of himself with his overwhelming ego that won't work in this type of situation and will lost as quick as he gets in that ring."

Brostar: "Then we have Nao Fook Mi, well her I know a bit about her cause we did had a bit of a problem between each other but last time we were in the ring she was laying in the ring out cold, So I think we can aspect the same results like we did those few weeks ago."

Brostar: "Finally we have The British Hawk who as been a thorn that won't go away, you see he had his chance to win the Ligero Maximo Title and he failed and now he whined and complained about things a going around here, well tonight I'm going to teach him that he had his go and he should let someone like me try to get the gold."

Brostar stands up as he about to leave the locker room for the match.

Brostar: "So it looks like it no one stands a chance against me and after tonight I will raise the Ligero Maximo Title above my head as tonight I become CHAMPION!!!!! Good day."

With that said Brostar leaves the locker room as the camera fades away.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

The arena lights go out. "Ability to Create a War by A Skylit Drive" blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with red smoke. Red spotlights scatter around the arena and then shines on and follow Lucian Blackheart as he makes his way to the ring posing and interacting with the fans.

Lucian Blackheart: "Just a moment ago.. Brostar was on that big shiny ULOL Tron, doing the only thing he knows how to do.. Frankly, something he isn't quite good at either. He talked a whole load of shit.. Bigger then what you'd expect to come from TMOM's fat ass."

Lucian take's a moment to calm himself.

Lucian Blackheart: "Now usually I'm not so frustrated when a complete utter nobody tries to shit all over me.. But since my reputation does proceed me, I'm not angry. In fact I found it quite humorous actually."

A giant smile appears on Lucian's face.

Lucian Blackheart: "He said I'll lose as quick as I get in the ring? I'm not sure if any of you saw our last PPV, but in that battle royale I was one of the final two contenders. Unfortunately for Brostar, he couldn't even make the final five contenders."

Lucian pauses briefly as he looks around, as most of the ULOL fans appear to be chanting "BLACKHEART!".

Lucian Blackheart: "Recognition.. Something you so desperately seek, but will never find. If anybody is walking out a champion here tonight.. there name definitely isn't Brostar.. and I'll be sure to see to that."

A devilish grin appears on Lucian's face. He spreads his arms out and shrugs his shoulders, then drops the mic and heads backstage.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

The scene shifts suddenly, showing the face of Alexander Conway seemingly in a hallway backstage. A vexed look is plastered onto his face.

Alexander Conway: "So this is what ULOL has degenerated to? A bunch of nobodies getting airtime week after week while Alexander freakin' Conway is left to sit on the sidelines? I had to steal this camera and this time for God's sake!"

Alexander turns the camera to focus further down the hall, to emphasize his point.

Alexander Conway: "Seriously, idiots like Brostar, who run around with defunct titles, are getting more scheduled airtime than I do. Idiots like The British Hawk, with comedy acts that are not the least bit entertaining, are getting more time than I do. A derelict wielding a Singapore cane gets more time than I do. These fools are not even half as good, Hell, they aren't even comparable to me! And yet, they receive more scheduled time than me. It's embarrassing that the management, especially Marcus, are too stupid to take advantage of their talent. I could defeat anyone on this roster, and I should even be the Primo Ultimo Champion right now! I have been held back by situations caused by cowards and fools, but that shall happen no more."

Alexander waves a finger in front of the camera.

Alexander Conway: "No longer will Alexander allow losers to take his time! No longer will Alexander allow himself to be oppressed by management! I am better than that, and soon.....I will once again prove it! Either Marcus, or Eunice, or whoever, I don't care! Somebody can either start booking Alexander Conway into matches, or else Alexander Conway will take matters into his own hands. And all of you "fans" can either like it.....or deal with it."

Alexander gives the camera one last look filled with menace, before he cuts the feed.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Marcus Troy sits in his office smoking his Cuban cigar and awaits for the arrival of the ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion whom he has summoned. Anger is seen in his eyes, anger directed at the humiliation that occurred last week at the hands of Raven Connoly. Just then the door swings open and Shogun walks in.

Marcus Troy: "Shogun! Just the person I wanted to see. I have a job for you Shogun. Something that I believe you can easily handle."

Marcus Troy waits for Shogun to settle down on the seat in front of his table before continuing.

Marcus Troy: "As you are certainly aware, last week, Raven disrespected me. In fact she even had the gall to strike me... I think it is only prudent that she should be punished. In fact I would like to send you to punish Raven... I understand both of you have some history of animosity together. Raven must be put in her place..."

Marcus looks at Shogun's expression or lack thereof at his command.

Marcus Troy: "Of course you will be fairly compensated for this. I always reward those who do my bidding."

Shogun stares at Troy wearing the same emotionless expression that always seems to find its way onto his head. Shogun looks into Troys eyes seeing the anger and embarrassment in his eyes and on his face. Marcus Troy was an open book never able to hide his emotions letting his enemies take the advantage from the moment they see him.

Shogun: "Ahh Marcus...What you have told me sums up what I was coming in to talk to you about."

A strange look now appeared on Troys face. As if he had an idea of what Shogun was about to tell him but he knew that the man did not have the guts to let him know. Unfortunately for him Shogun is not a man who fears consequences for his actions.

Shogun: "First of all no I will not be taking care of your business with Raven for you. I have more important things on my mind then saving you from having your pride wounded by your nightly wet dream. "

There it is, the anger hit Troys face like a sudden eruption amusing Shogun to no end though the naked eye would never notice it.

Shogun: "Secondly it seems as if I am the only member of this alliance who can go a week without making a fool out of myself. What kind of leader are you supposed to be Troy? Am I supposed to follow the lead of a man who cannot even keep his crowd in check? Am I supposed to be ordered around by a man who goes out every week and embarrasses himself in front of a live audience as well as people watching on television?"

Troys anger is rising with every word it can be seen by any moron with half of a brain.

Shogun: "Why should I take time out MY training to fight your battles for you Troy? I have a title to defend and with a servant as incompetent as Zombie fighting UJJ I am fairly certain that UJJ will come out victorious and gain a shot at my belt. I know that I shall easily dismantle UJJ when the time comes but I do not have time to go about finishing your old battles with Raven for you. She is top level competition and I cannot afford a war with her so close to my next title defense and unless you wish for Eunice to add another title belt to her Alliances growing collection you have better stay out of my way."

Shogun: "This little alliance of yours is pathetic Troy. Without me it would simply crumble due to lack of competent talent. I am the only successful person in our little group and I prove it every week by winning matches or making Eunice fear for her dwindling life to the point that I can openly insult her alliance and threaten her without so much as a response."

Shogun: "Tell me Troy what have you been doing lately other than harassing innocent fans and letting your foolish Zombie murder them in crowds for your personal amusement? I am a man of honor Troy and I am embarrassed to be in an alliance fool of weaklings and fools. Not to mention the COWARD that seems to think he is leading this little tugboat of a force."

Troy nearly leaves his chair before sitting down after a look of pure intense anger from Shogun.

Shogun: "No man other than a coward would kill people simply to get at his enemy Troy and you know it as well as I. Tell me now do you seriously think that you EVER controlled me? In fact do you seriously think that I ever truly intended to use this alliance as anything other than a way to stay on a side and prevent a two front battle for my belt? Are you truly that much of a fool Troy? Answer me now!"

Shogun waits for Troys answer noticing the pure anger in Troys eyes knowing that he had hit all of the buttons he had meant to press

Marcus stares in contempt at Shogun, yet he knows that at this point he still needs the Primo Ultimo Champion at his side...

Marcus Troy: "It seems that I underestimated you Shogun, while it's true that I still need you for now, do not think that you are irreplaceable. Getting a win at the PPV may have bloated your head a little. I suggest you let some of the air out. The Age of Pain and Zombie may have little kinks but after a little polishing, I think I will be able to use them properly. Be glad that you have no real competition yet Shogun, for once you do, I doubt that you will still stay as cocky as you are now."

Marcus Troy settles down a bit.

Marcus Troy: "You also need not worry about Johnson beating Zombie. I've made sure that it will not happen. Let's just say I've made proper precautions... That title will stay on you... Unless of course you decide to cross me. But know well that your unwillingness to perform the task I asked of you shall be remembered..."

Shogun keeps his icy stare fixed on Troy even after he is finished speaking, knowing that the man has severely underestimated him.

Shogun: "I did not hear an answer from you Troy. Yet that only proves that you are indeed a fool. If you think I need you to keep this title then you are greatly mistaken. I won this belt under my own power and I can easily keep it the same way."

Shogun leans down and rests his hands and Troys desk so he will be eye level with the General Manager.

Shogun: "You are the one who needs me and I know this. If anything you are lucky that I have no interest in any sort of power lest I could take it easily. I am clearly the strongest wrestler in this company which is why you wish to keep me on your side."

Shogun: "However you do not control me Troy. I am far to powerful to have an owner. I am not let into battle by fools and I expect you to remember this."

Shogun looks directly into Troys eyes.

Shogun: "I am not cocky Troy I simply know that I am the best. There is no competition against me because I am the best in the world. I want to be put into matches with strong competition but you seem to want to interfere in my business night in an night out!"

A small hint of anger can be seen in Shoguns eyes. Troys foolishness is beginning to fall upon me as well. I cannot let that happen.

Shogun: "Your actions have given me the title of a weakling who cannot fight alone Troy and that is unacceptable. I will not have you make a fool out of me for I am the Demonic God!"

Shogun: "Remember who started this alliance Troy! I can end it just as quickly as it began if you continue with your foolish battle to keep yourself in power. You got yourself into this mess by abusing your position and you know you did. This federation is in turmoil. A war on both sides has it shaking apart quickly. The only way for it to recover is for one side to strike the killing blow quickly. If I must be that killing strike I will be it Troy...whether it is for your side or the other for I am not going to leave my fate in the hands of you or Eunice."

Shogun holds the his icy stare. Trying to get Troy to understand such a simple matter is the same as teaching a young babe algebra at the tender age of two. It simply will not work.

Shogun: "What you should be focusing on is not Raven and your pitiful grudge against her. No your focus should be finishing Eunice once and for all! I have beaten wevery opponent she has set against me! Now is the time to strike back and it is YOUR job to make it happen!"

Shogun stands at his full height again still keeping his eyes on Troy. The emotionless expression is still plastered onto his face as always.

Marcus Troy: "It seems I have a snake in my midst. I know what you are capable of Shogun but remember well, that title you are holding, it wouldn't have been possible if I did not book the match. You would not have held on to it for this long without my intervention. Champions do fall Shogun and one thing I can be sure of is that you will not always be on top. You have that belt right now but cross me and I assure you that it WILL change hands."

Marcus Troy takes a puff from his cigar.

Marcus Troy: "You call me a fool? Well a bigger fool is one who goes against my wishes Shogun. You are stepping in a fine line. It is true that I have need for your talents but losing you does not mean that I won't survive. I still have some tricks up my sleeve. Eunice Winslow will fall, and I will be there to enjoy it when it happens whether you are at my side or not."

The general manager and the Primo Ultimo champion stare at each other at a stalemate as the scene slowly fades to black.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Thu Feb 17, 2011 7:31 pm

Alexander Conway is sitting on a bench inside his locker room. It looks as though he has just settled in after his earlier hijacking of the camera. He is watching a match, a match involving a younger Alexander Conway inside a PMLW ring. Beside Alexander on the bench is a DVD case. On the front in big letters is "The Best of Alexander Conway".

Ray Kamaura and Leon Hinomoto open the door and walk into the locker room. Ray notices what he is watching.

Ray Kamaura: "OK, Conway we have a... Are you watching yourself?"

Alexander jumps up and quickly spins around to face the two men.

Alexander Conway: "Who the hell do you think you are?! Barging into other people's locker rooms like there's no such thing as privacy anymore! But to answer your question, yes, I am watching myself. I mean, who wouldn't want to watch greatness at work?"

Without waiting for an answer to the question he believes rhetorical, Alexander continues speaking.

Alexander Conway: "Now, I'd really like to listen to whatever it is that you two came in here for, but I'm just a bit busy."

A look of shock and awe over takes Ray's face.

Ray Kamaura: "No you're not."

Ray grabs the remote and turns off the TV.

Leon Hinomoto: "Listen, how would like you to come to ring side with us from now on?"

Ray Kamaura: "We figured you could join us in the DWMA."

Ray and Leon wait for Alexander's reply.

Alexander Conway: "Whoa, wait a second, really? You two barge into my locker room, turn off my TV, interrupt my day, and expect me to want to accompany you two down to ringside? There is a plethora of insults I could throw out right now, but I'll give you two a chance to explain to me why I would even consider joining the DWMA."

Alexander pauses for a moment, but soon takes the time to toss in another question.

Alexander Conway: "And you two could also tell me what DWMA even stands for."

Ray Kamaura: "Well we don't really know what it stands for, but we do know why we want you. We are going after the titles of the ULOL as to bring power to the proper side. It's not a take over, but more like a controlling force. We're countering The Age of Suck with an age of awesome."

Ray laughs at his joke while the other two men stare at. He stops and mumbles just loud enough for the camera to hear.

Ray: "Last time I share my jokes with you two."

Leon Hinomoto: "See we are going to take the tag team titles. Then you are going to grab the Primo Ultimo."

Leon waits for Alexander to reply to the offer that is placed before him.

Alexander takes his former seat. He has a bored look on his face as he continues the conversation.

Alexander Conway: "So you are just another cog in the wall? You two are just a few more bricks in the wall? The same as everyone else and not different in the least? Ray, even though I treated you poorly when you first arrived here, and even pretended to not know of you, I have to think of this as a fairly different step for you. I've seen your work for other promotions, and this is just a bit unlike you. Mr. Innovation has lost a step? It's surprising Leon is following you through this. I can't help but think that your change in style and demeanour is caused by your previous injuries. How can I rely on two people who are not only not fighting at 100%, but have changed so drastically?"

Ray looks stunned as what Alexander Conway says crosses in his mind.

Ray Kamaura: "I have changed but only for now. I have been wrestling for a good number of years now and what do i have to show for it? Nothing. So Im using the War to grab a hold of some gold. If we work together then it will be just like the good old days."

A scowl appears on Alexander's face as he hears Ray regard the older times.

Alexander Conway: "I'm surprised you'd mention those days, but they are long past. You are right though. Why fault you for taking advantage of the opportunity presented? We'd be doing Eunice a favor by getting the gold anyway, strong champions are what she needs to win this war and we are just the people to do it. I guess I'll help you two out, I'll meet you both in the ring."

Ray and Leon exit the locker room as Alexander turns back on his TV. The scene fades to black as Alexander resumes play of his old match.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

The scene opens in the Oriental Spices locker room where we see Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi doing some warm-ups just before their match. To the naked eye, it may seem that these two are doing something inappropriate when in fact, they are just helping each other doing some stretches.

Little Wang: "Uhhh... Man that feels good, that loosened me up a bit!"

Little Wang moaned as his partner Nao Fook Mi helped him stretch out some more.

Little Wang: "Ugh, that match earlier was tough... My muscles will be sore for a week."

Little Wang starts to do a little shadow boxing and grimaces in pain.

Little Wang: "I think I may have bitten off more than I can chew. I hope I can even last the upcoming gauntlet."

Nao Fook Mi nods in agreement while lifting her leg vertically in a front split and leaning her leg against the wall pushing upon it.

Nao Fook Mi: "Well we have to put that tag match behind us. It's not important whether we win or lose, it is important that we give our all so that we do not disgrace our master."

Fook Mi switches to her other leg and resumes stretching.

Nao Fook Mi: "Are you sure you can still go? Don't over-exert yourself Wang... If you think you can't do it anymore, drop out..."

Little Wang waves Fook's Mi's advice off. Fook Mi stares at the clock.

Nao Fook Mi: "Looks like it's almost time for our match. C'mon, lets go..."

Both wrestlers wrap up their routine and leaves the locker room as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

VS

VS

Jim Jackson: "And now is what everyone's been waiting for. The main event of the evening, tonight we shall crown a new ULOL Ligero Maximo Champion."

Brad Blood: "Seriously, people are still gunning for that belt even though it was shoved up Zombie's ass?"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is the main event of the evening and it is a gauntlet match for the ULOL Ligero Maximo Championship, Introducing first, Brostar!"

"I Am... All of Me" by Crush 40 plays as Brostar appears on stage posing for the fans. Runs down the ramp into the ring and poses again.

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next, The British Hawk!"

"Get Ready To Fly" by Grits starts to play over the arena. The fans start to cheer loudly as The British Hawk rises from beneath he stage via a lift underneath the stage. He is wearing his ususal wrestling attire and with a black hooded jacket with the hood up. He walks off the lift and raises his arms up triggering stage pyros to go off. He walks down to the ramp and enters the ring. He climbs onto a turnbuckle and removes his hood and taunts to the fans who cheer loudly.

Jim Jackson: "Here comes the first two competitors. The rules of the gauntlet match is simple, two men shall battle with the winner staying in the ring to face a new opponent, this goes on until all the challengers have come out and one winner is finally proclaimed."

Brad Blood: "The British Hawk will have it tough, pissing off Marcus Troy got him to be one of the first wrestlers to battle it out, he has to keep his fatigue level in check if he wants to last."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell! Brostar charges in... Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and Brostar goes down. Spinning back kick from The British Hawk. Spin kick by The British Hawk to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. TBH uses a basement dropkick to the knee and down goes Brostar!"

Brad Blood: "Bird Brain is really pouring it on to Brostar. I really don't like both of them so I really am cheering for no one here."

Jim Jackson: "Irish whip sends Brostar to the corner. Here comes TBH... Brostar avoids The British Hawk's avalanche by getting out of the way. TBH smashes into the corner hard. Brostar quickly rolls The British Hawk up as he staggers back."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kick out by The British Hawk who throws a wild right as Brostar dodges his fist."

Jim Jackson: "Lightning kick by Brostar on TBH. There's a two count on the pin. Brostar gets taken down out of nowhere! GORGEOUS Spinning bulldog in the corner and Brostar is down. The British Hawk for the cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "BroLOSER kicks out. Bird Brain gets shoved aback as BroLOSER fights back to his feet."

Jim Jackson: " Tiger suplex on Brostar and TBH goes for the pin, Brostar kicks out before the ref can begin the count. Brostar blocks a kick from The British Hawk. Brostar kicks the leg, knocks TBH down, and goes to work on it. Irish whip sends The British Hawk slamming unto the turnbuckles."

Brad Blood: "Brostar charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Ooh! I bet Brostar will be tasting leather for the rest of the night."

Jim Jackson: "Second rope flying axe handle, Brostar goes down. One day, TBH might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. The British Hawk jumps onto the turnbuckle and taunts to the fans. He leaps off the top rope performing a 450 degree somersault and splashing onto the opponent with a brutal 450 Splash!! He hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Brad Blood: "Haha! Bye bye Brostar!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Brostar has been eliminated!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk with an impressive victory, the question is who will he face next?"

"Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor starts playing on the speakers as flashing multicolored lights starts flashing at the top of the entrance ramp as smoke rises from the floor. A small form suddenly bounces out of the entrance tunnel and through the smoke which is slowly clearing. The crowd looks wide-eyed at the small midget standing on top of the entrance ramp with both arms in the air waving a victory sign with his fingers. The midget runs down the ramp and scampers into the ring.

Brad Blood: "IT'S THE MIDGET!!! THE MIDGET!!!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk connects with a back heel kick on Wang and gets back up quickly. Little Wang gets sent to the corner with an Irish whip! He avoids The British Hawk's avalanche by rolling out of the way. Little Wang connects with a back heel kick on TBH and gets back up quickly. Little Wang hits a clothesline to the knee!"

Brad Blood: "TBH just stares at the midget... Looks like that clothesline had little or no effect at all. Little Wang goes to the ropes..."

Jim Jackson: "Springboard dropkick from Little Wang! TBH gets up but gets hit a hurracanrana! Little Wang tries to lift TBH up..."

Brad Blood: "Little Wang latches on TBH's leg! TBH kicks Little Wang off of him!"

Jim Jackson: "Wang takes a flying neckbreaker from The British Hawk. Flying cross body off the top rope! The referee goes to the mat!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Little Wang gets a shoulder up and kicks TBH on the shin. TBH chases Little Wang around the ring! He's grasping for Little Wang but can't get a firm hold on Little Wang!"

Jim Jackson: "Back heel kick off the second rope, Wang goes down. Wang blocks a kick from The British Hawk. Lightning kick by Wang on TBH. Little Wang for the cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Whoa! A shining wizard out of nowhere by Little Wang! Looks like Little Wang is signaling for his finisher!"

Jim Jackson: "Little Wang climbs up to the top of the ring post and leaps tucking his knees to chest, he executes a backflip in mid-air... THE BRITISH HAWK ROLLS AWAY AND LITTLE WANG MISSES HIS DWARF STAR PRESS! TBH kicks Little Wang in the gut and places Little Wang's head under his arm then lifts him horizontally before slamming him on the mat executing a brutal British Slam!!"

Brad Blood: "I think he just killed the midget Jim! TBH hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, Little Wang has been eliminated!"

Jim Jackson: "And The British Hawk gets another victory! But now he shall face either Lucian Blackheart or Nao Fook Mi next, will he still have enough stamina to win?"

Oriental music starts playing on the background as smoke covers the mouth of the entrance tunnel. Suddenly out leaps Nao Fook Mi wearing a short cheongsam. She quickly makes her way down entrance ramp and enters the ring. She bows and gives her respect to the crowd before heading to her corner.

Brad Blood: "IT'S COME FOOK MI!!! COME FOOK MI BABY!!!"

Jim Jackson: "It's NAO Fook Mi Brad..."

Brad Blood: "COME... NAO... Fook Mi all the same."

Jim Jackson: "TBH walks into a high dropkick from Nao Fook Mi, almost losing several teeth in the process. Nao Fook Mi misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. The British Hawk strikes Fook Mi."

Brad Blood: "Bird Brain tries to send Nao Fook Mi to the ropes... Fook Mi reverses an irish whip and The British Hawk runs into the referee! Oh, that referee has been knocked around silly."

Jim Jackson: "Springboard dropkick from The British Hawk. Nicely done. TBH hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Fook Mi fights out of the pinfall attempt. The British Hawk misses a clothesline. Fook Mi uses a basement dropkick to the knee... Super kick by Nao Fook Mi and The British Hawk goes down hard. Nao Fook Mi hooks the leg... "

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "The British Hawk gets out of that one! TBH and Fook Mi start exchanging blows... OOH! TBH just got bitch-slapped hard!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk retaliates with a high kick grazing Fook Mi at the side of the head! TBH applies a sleeper hold... Fook Mi counters with a jawbreaker! DDT from the top rope by Nao Fook Mi. That looked KILLER. Pin!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "TBH is out just before the three count. The British Hawk fights out of a grapple but gets caught with a spinning side kick to the midsection. Ooh! TBH falls to his knees."

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi goes for the attack... TBH counters with a back body drop! Springboard reverse elbow by The British Hawk. Excellent move, TBH hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Birdie wasn't able to finish Fook Mi off! TBH whips Fook Mi into the turnbuckles... He charges in... FOOK MI SLIPS THROUGH THE MIDDLE ROPES AND BIRDIE HITS THE TURNBUCKLES! FOOK MI KICKS OVER THE TOP ROPE AND SENDS BIRDIE DOWN!"

Jim Jackson: "Springboard crossbody by Fook Mi! She connects! The referee is about to count but spots The British Hawk's leg is on the bottom rope! Fook Mi drags TBH to the middle of the ring... Nao Fook Mi slips behind her opponent and locks her forearms over her opponent's neck and nape choking her opponent to unconsciousness executing a devastating Fook Mi to Sleep!!!"

Brad Blood: "She has her choke hold locked in! TBH is gasping for air! TBH TAPS!!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, The British Hawk has been eliminated!"

Jim Jackson: "The British Hawk eliminates two wrestlers before falling to Fook Mi."

Brad Blood: "Heh, you can say he got fooked over! I mean he did the hard work eliminating two men, Fook Mi beat a tired TBH... Not like I'm defending that Bird Brain... I mean, I'm glad he's out."

The arena lights go out. "Ability to Create a War by A Skylit Drive" blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with red smoke. Red spotlights scatter around the arena and then shines on and follow Lucian Blackheart as he makes his way to the ring posing and interacting with the fans.

Jim Jackson: "And now we have Lucian Blackheart, the last man to enter the gauntlet... This will be one helluva battle. Can Fook Mi defeat Lucian Blackheart and claim the title that Q once held or will Lucian Blackheart devour Fook Mi?"

Brad Blood: "Well Blackheart leaps into the apron and into the ring. Right off the bat Fook Mi takes him down with a dropkick!"

Jim Jackson: "Flying elbow from Nao Fook Mi connects. Super kick by Nao Fook Mi sends Lucian Blackheart flying across the ring! Fook Mi covers hoping for a quick finish."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Blackheart gets a shoulder up before three. Fook Mi picks him up but he starts to fight back. Both wrestlers start exchanging stiff chops! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~!"

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart blocks a punch. Fook Mi takes a kick to the chest, and staggers back. A blind charge only gets an even HARDER kick. A bodyslam on Fook Mi by Blackheart who sets up a legdrop. Blackheart for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "This time Fook Mi kicks out at two. Both wrestlers are evenly matched at this point."

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart nails a side suplex! He rolls Fook Mi up... No! Fook Mi reverses and Blackheart is on the bottom!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Blackheart reverses again and now he's on top with a great view on Fook Mi's butt!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Running clothesline from Lucian Blackheart... Fook Mi dodges it but is quickly subdued by a headlock! Fook Mi powers out of a headlock and sends Blackheart to the corner hard with an Irish whip. Fook Mi charges in. She eats a leather as Blackheart gets a leg up!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian Blackheart climbs atop the top turnbuckles, he's going for a flying double axe handle... Fook Mi trips him and he falls right on his nuts! Oh! That has gotta hurt."

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi leaps up in front of Blackheart... SUPER frankensteiner on Blackheart, who hit hard and is loopy as a result. Fook Mi hooks the leg, this may be it..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Blackheart kicks out and even Fook Mi is shocked! Blackheart struggles to his feet, it is clear that he's still groggy..."

Jim Jackson: "Blackheart walks into a face crusher variation. Fook Mi for the cover but Blackheart has his leg on the bottom rope! Fook Mi pulls Blackheart away... A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! Fook Mi hooks the leg again."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Blackheart kicks out and Fook Mi stares at her opponent in disbelief!"

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi just WAFFLES Blackheart with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Irish whip sends Blackheart to the corner. Lucian Blackheart avoids a Nao Fook Mi avalanche by getting out of the way! Blackheart knocks Fook Mi down with a hard right!"

Brad Blood: "Fook Mi drops like a log! Blackheart again goes high risk... Will he connect this time? Blackheart leaps..."

Jim Jackson: "Nao Fook Mi slugs Lucian Blackheart, sending him down into the corner. While Fook Mi fires up the crowd, Blackheart is removing the turnbuckle pad! Nao Fook Mi comes over...but Blackheart grabs her by the tights and uses the leverage to slingshot Nao Fook Mi face first into the exposed steel turnbuckle!"

Brad Blood: "FOOK MI IS BUSTED OPEN! FOOK MI GOT FOOKED!"

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart kicks the opponent to the stomach then does a 180 degree spin and a backflip kick to the opponents face. Lucian Blackheart then proceeds to place the opponent into a modified triangle choke position executing a deadly Roll of Fate! Blackheart has Fook Mi trapped!"

Brad Blood: "Fook Mi is fading fast, she tries to reach to ropes but is too far away! Fook Mi has no choice but to tap! FOOK MI TAPS!!! LUCIAN BLACKHEART WINS! The ref is calling for the bell!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and NEW ULOL Ligero Maximo Champion, Lucian Blackheart!"

Jim Jackson: "And Blackheart does it! He wins the gauntlet and is the NEW ULOL Ligero Maximo champion! He raises the title up in the air as the crowd boos loudly. I guess they don't appreciate the fact that Blackheart used cheap tactics to win."

Brad Blood: "Hey he just did what he had to do to win! Nothing more nothing less."

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Jim Jackson: "What a night! What a night. UJJ wins a title shot, Lucian Blackheart becomes the new ULOL Ligero Maximo champion... This certainly was a night to remember."

Brad Blood: "Hah, did you see the beatdown TMOM and UJJ took under Zombie and The Age of Pain? That was awesome!"

Jim Jackson: "There also is some tension between Shogun and Marcus Troy... Plus a new stable seems to be underway too."

Brad Blood: "Well a lot of things did happen here tonight. I bet this is just but the tip of the iceberg. Anything can happen here. You reckon UJJ will be in top shape to challenge for the Primo Ultimo?"

Jim Jackson: "It will be hard to say Brad... But one thing is certain, the fans will be excited to see what happens next. So tune in next week folks! For my partner Brad Blood this is Jim Jackson saying good night!"

Lucha Loco 02/17/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 02/17/2011

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