Subject: HanuChrisKwanbo 12/26/2010 Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:28 am
VS
Jim Jackson: "Welcome to our countdown to HanuChrisKwanbo! We are just minutes away from the start of the United League of Lunatics' yearend event! And it is a packed card that is about to be unwrapped for you tonight! I'm Jim Jackson, and with me is my broadcast colleague, Brad Blood!"
Brad Blood: "Yes, HanuChrisKwanbo is loaded with big matches! We have the Primo Ultimo Champion, Shogun, defending his gold against newcomer Ray Kamaura, who has practically come in from nowhere to become the top challenger for ULOL's biggest prize! On this preview to HanuChrisKwanbo, we have a match between the British Hawk and newcomer Puu "The Pig Farmer!""
Jim Jackson: "We also have new champions to be crowned tonight! The championship matches to determine the first Ligero Maximo and the Campeónes Compañero will be decided on HanuChrisKwanbo! Some people are going home with some special holiday cheer tonight!"
Brad Blood: "And some guys are going home with huge lumps of coal for their holiday gifts!"
Jim Jackson: "Ever since winning his first ever world title, Shogun has managed to fend off all challengers to his Primo Ultimo Title! But later tonight, he is facing the challenge of Ray Kamaura, a newcome who has immediately made an impact in the United League of Lunatics with his ruthless aggression!"
A clip plays of Shogun's confrontation with his upcoming challenger.
Shogun: "So a contender has been chosen at last! Ray Kamaura you got the show you wanted and now you will be able to test yourself against the best in the world!"
Shogun waits for the crowd to finish cheering before he speaks again.
Shogun: "I wouldn't not get to excited if I were you people...I will not be losing my championship at the PPV. Whether it was Ray or Johnson or Bloodflame the results will always be the same I will some out of the match with this belt over my shoulder EVER SINGLE TIME! No man has what it takes to take this title out of my hands."
The crowd boos loudly.
Shogun: "There's no one alive who has what it takes to beat me NO ONE! I will prove it to you fools one way or another that I am the best wrestler on the face of the earth and if you do not accept it you will just have to be the next sacrifice..."
Shogun: "Ray Kamaura! I respect your skills and I know you will give me a challenge but you simply are not good enough to beat me! At the PPV we will find out if I am correct or just talking to talk but trust me when I say you will find that I am the best wrestler in the world and you are not..."
Shogun lowers the mic as music begins to play in the arena.
"Life is Beautiful" by Sixx AM blares throughout the arena and when the lyrics start to play Ray Kamaura makes his way to the ring very slowly.
Ray moves to the middle of the ring and raises the mic to his mouth.
Ray Kamaura: "Hello Shogun. I would like to wish you luck. But I'm walking out of the PPV with that belt. It's gonna take you a lot more than your "darkness" to stop me."
Ray lowers his mic and waits.
Shogun cracks a rare smile.
Shogun: "I like your style I really do...but its going to take a lot more than that to beat me."
Shogun steps forward and gets in Kamaura's face.
Shogun: "I take nothing away from your skills in the ring I am just telling you that I think I am better...I hope that together we can put on the greatest match that the fans have ever seen but in the end I will come out on top and I will leave ULOLs first PPV STILL...the Primo Ultimo champion!"
Shogun raises the championship into the air in front of Kamaura.
Shogun: "And to the people... Whether you like me or you hate me you still watch my matches and you still chant something at me so I know you watch every week just to see what happens when the Demonic God gets into the ring!"
Shogun: "No matter what happens I will never let this belt go but I still hope you give me a challenge Ray...good luck at the PPV."
Shogun drops the mic steps back and holds out his hand for Ray to shake.
Ray Kamaura: "Good luck."
Ray reaches out for Shogun's hand to shake it. The crowd starts to cheer as Ray's Music starts to play.
Jim Jackson: "That will be our main event, later tonight!"
Brad Blood: "We also have the Campeónes Compañero title match, to be contested between the Morbidly Obese Man and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson, and the team of Arnold "GoodFella" Bold and Felix Schwarz! Both teams have taken tough trips to get this far, with the GoodFella having to replace his tag team partner with Felix Schwarz, after Taufik fell off the face of the earth."
Jim Jackson: "Our thoughts go with Taufik's loved ones as they continue to search for him. Despite this very tough time, GoodFella has soldiered on, taking Felix Schwarz as a new tag team partner. Together, they won the contenders' match for the Campeónes Compañero, where they will face Morbidly Unstoppable."
Brad Blood: "GoodFella's manager has made accusations that someone doesn't want his talent in the title match, after video allegedly about Taufik was shown in the contenders' match. That accusation probably won't sit well with Morbidly Unstoppable."
Jim Jackson: "And now we have our preview match for HanuChrisKwanbo. We go to Jasmine Lee!"
Jasmine Lee: "The following match is for one fall! Introducing first, making his way to the ring, here is Puu "The Pig Farmer!""
Pigs squeels are heard as Puu "The Pig Farmer" jogs his way to the ring
Jasmine Lee: His opponent, making his way to the ring, the British Hawk!"
'Get Ready To Fly' by Grits starts to play over the arena. The fans start to cheer loudly as The British Hawk rises from beneath he stage via a lift underneath the stage. He is wearing his ususal wrestling attire and with a black hooded jacket with the hood up. He walks off the lift and raises his arms up triggering stage pyros to go off. He walks down to the ramp and enters the ring. He climbs onto a turnbuckle and removes his hood and taunts to the fans who cheer loudly.
Jasmine Lee: The referee for this match is Don Q. Hotte! LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"
Jim Jackson: "The Britsh Hawk and Puu lock up! Puu quick to score an advantage with a headlock takedown!"
Brad Blood: "While Hawk and Puu go at it, let's talk about the Ligero Maximo title match. We have Sr. Gonzales, Q and Alexander Conway all vying for the belt."
Jim Jackson: "Each man qualified to become one of the last three contenders, and they're all highly motivated to take their game to the next level as they gun for a title tonight."
Brad Blood: "Though at least one of the three contenders is less than happy about the match. Alexander Conway has made no secret of his displeasure over being part of the Ligero Maximo match, instead of challenging for the Primo Ultimo, but he's still competing in the match anyway."
Jim Jackson: "Just because he's not satisfied with being part of the Ligero Maximo match does not mean he doesn't want championship gold around his waist. Should be a very competitive match between Conway, Q and Gonzales, as each man is out to prove himself as the best man to claim the title."
Brad Blood: "We also got Bloodflame and Lucian Blackheart, itching to claim final victgory in their blood feud tonight, as they go for THE BRITISH HAWK WITH A FRANKENSTEINER TO PUU!"
Jim Jackson: "Puu has been planted on his head! The British Hawk goes for the cover!"
Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"
Brad Blood: "And Hawk wins it! Does this mean the preview is over? "
Jim Jackson: "I guess so. Ladies and gentlemen, we're about to start HanuChrisKwanbo shortly!"
The British Hawk celebrates as the preview for the PPV ends.
Jim Jackson: "Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to a very special night! Tonight we have ULOL's first ever pay-per-view HanuChrisKwanbo!"
Brad Blood: "You got that right, for those who missed the dark match because they are watching from their TV's tough! You should have bought a live ticket!"
Jim Jackson: "Anyhow we have a great show for everyone watching tonight. That's right, we have Nao Fook Mi taking on the Stank Duo, Bloodflame going against Lucian Blackheart but we mustn't forget the title matches. For the Ligero Maximo, Alexander Conway, Q and Sr. Gonzalez will be fighting for the lightweight title."
Brad Blood: "Don't forget GoodFella and Schwarz going against Morbidly Unstoppable in a TLC match... Toilet Lavatory and Crap!"
Jim Jackson: "And of course the main event we have Shogun defending against Ray Kamaura for the Primo Ultimo title! Now I know everyone is eager to get things started so... LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"
"Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing on the speakers as smoke rises from the floor. Out from the smoke the figure of Marcus Troy, the general manager of United League of Lunatics emerges. He quickly makes his way down the ring in his signature three piece Armani suit and a cigar between his lips. He grabs a mic with one hand and raises it up to his lips as he takes the cigar out with the other one. He puffs his cigar one more time staring down the anticipating crowd before speaking.
Marcus Troy: "First of all welcome to ULOL's first PPV HanuChrisKwanbo! Before we get things started I have a few surprises I would like to add for tonight. As we all know for the tag team match we have something special lined up for all our fans, but it wouldn't be fair not to make the matches for the Ligero Maximo and Primo Ultimo special."
Marcus Troy smiles and pauses as the crowd realizes that he is about to make the PPV more interesting.
Marcus Troy: "That's right for the ULOL Ligero Maximo title match, it will now be Alexander Conway against Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing against Sr. Gonzales in a cage match! That's right four sides of hard and unforgiving steel shall surround these three men."
The crowd cheers at the announcement.
Marcus Troy: "But wait! That is not all! For the Primo Ultimo match, Shogun and Ray Kamaura shall battle for the gold in a thirty minute IRON MAN match! Thirty minutes to prove that you deserve the gold!"
The cheers grow louder at the second announcement.
Marcus Troy: "I am sure you are all pleased with my decision... I can't say the wrestlers will be happy but then again I don't really care. So with that out of the way, let the show begin!"
Marcus Troy drops the mic and exits to backstage.
The scene opens backstage where we see Stephanie Dawson standing with Nao Fook Mi.
Stephanie Dawson: "Good evening everyone, we are here backstage with Nao Fook Mi who right now seems to be in a dire position as she is slated to fight Stank Lord and Brostar in a handicap match tonight. Ms. Nao, what are your thoughts on tonight's battle?"
Nao Fook Mi: "Thoughts? Well it is true I will be fighting an uphill battle tonight but I think that I can overcome tonight's odds and emerge victorious. Stank Lord and Brostar are the rotten core which we must get rid of in order to cleanse this place and tonight I shall be the one doing the cleansing."
Stephanie Dawson nods at Fook Mi's statements.
Stephanie Dawson: "But aren't you afraid that their double team may get the best of you? What is your strategy for tonight?"
Nao Fook Mi: "I would be lying if I said that I am not afraid. But yet it is this fear that fuels my determination to overcome it. They may have the numbers game so I must end this match as early as possible. Besides, I have a friend watching my back tonight."
Stephanie Dawson: "Are you talking about Little Wang? No offense but he will have the size disadvantage."
Nao Fook Mi: "Little Wang has trained with me in the martial arts in China for years, do not let his small stature fool you. He may be small but he can kill giants. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to prepare for the match."
Stephanie Dawson: "Thank you for your time Ms. Nao. And now back to the booth!"
VS
Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Intorducing first, making his way to the ring, representing the Stank Gang, here is Brandon Cavo!"
Brandon Cavo comes out, quickly running to the ring.
Jasmine Lee: "His opponent, making his way to the ring, here is Allister King!"
A Coyote Howl is heard throughout the arena as the entrance is covered in smoke. Godsmack's Whiskey Hangover begins to play as Allister King walks out onto the entrance ramp with a cigarette in his mouth and a bottle of whiskey in his hand. Allister King is also dressed up as a reindeer, though his costume looks like it's been urinated on recently.
Brad Blood: "Oh come ON."
Jim Jackson: "Say what you will about Allister King, but he's always doing something that gets people talking. Even if he doesn't realize people are talking about him."
Brad Blood: "The man is drunk half the time, AT LEAST. Hell, HE doesn't even know what he's doing half the time. I think."
Jim Jackson: "Well, he has a match now. I think King is at least aware of that. And despite his...inebriation, the man has shown he is a very dangerous competitor."
Brad Blood: "Or someone who is just incredibly lucky. Y'know, for a guy who isn't into the holidays, he's totally dressed for it."
Jim Jackson: "Well, maybe he's not aware he's dressed up as Rudolph right now."
Brad Blood: "Brandon Cavo is going to fight someone dressed up as a reindeer. That should be a quick search on Youtube."
Jim Jackson: "Cavo wastes no time attacking Allister King! He's got King reeling from a quick barrage of punches and kicks! King is sent to the ropes...and Cavo with an armdrag!"
Brad Blood: "Brandon takes King down with a flying shoulderblock!"
Jim Jackson: "And Cavo with another flying shoulder King stumbles out of the way! Cavo flies over the ropes!"
Brad Blood: "He just landed in a heap at ringside!"
Jim Jackson: "Allister King getting to his feet. And I don't think he even realizes what has happened to his opponent! He's just helping himself to another swig of his liquor!"
Brad Blood: "Cavo in a complete daze on the outside!"
Jim Jackson: "Allister King is going onto the ring apron! FLIES OFF AND LANDS ON CAVO WITH A THESZ PRESS!"
Brad Blood: "Allister the Drunken Reindeer makes his HanuChrisJKwanbo delivery!"
Jim Jackson: "King...helps himself to another shot of his liquor! He's grabbing Cavo...Allister King grabs the opponent by the throat before lifting them in a gorilla press. Allister throws them in the air and catches them before slamming them violently to the floor with a widow maker executing an Overdose!"
Brad Blood: "Brandon Cavo getting his butt kicked by a guy in a reindeer suit!"
Jim Jackson: "King gets the lifeless Cavo into the ring! He's got him covered for the pin!
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match...Allister King!"
Jim Jackson: "King makes quick work on Cavo!"
Brad Blood: "And now he's celebrating by getting more drunk in the ring."
The Morbidly Obese Man Admin
Posts : 2990 Join date : 2008-12-29 Age : 48
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Subject: Re: HanuChrisKwanbo 12/26/2010 Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:29 am
The scene opens as we see one half of The Entourage in the locker room. He is very nervous. His manager Manolo Ferrer and Felix Schwarz is in the locker room as well. Arnold calms himself before he starts to speak.
Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "What was that about that video? It aired during my match and I got pinned. I will squash the guy who did that video, I will destroy him. How dare he says that “Dashing” Taufik is no more in this world! How dare he say that… What's your hired man doing Schwarz? I got calls from people that a guy looking like Taufik is in an Elvis costume or he emigrated to Russia. Now I get this video which was dedicated to me. He says that he is coming... Well let’s say I will greet him with chair shot to the head."
Then he suddenly hears the ringtone of his cellphone. GoodFella checks it and he sees that someone sent him a video.
GoodFella doesn’t look very happy as he sees video that been sent to him by the stranger. He even doesn’t have any words how to describe feeling that he has now. He calms himself for a minute and starts to talk.
Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "You see this video? Someone wants to make me a very unhappy and dangerous man. When I am dangerous, people get injured. Whoever is messing with me is going to get it real bad when I find out who he is. I will make sure he's swimming with the fishes when I'm done with him... With cement shoes!"
Felix Schwarz looks into the eyes of Arnold Bold.
Felix Schwarz: "First of all you need to calm down, we have a match today remember? And in a state like this you can’t compete, do you know that? Anger causes you to make mistakes. Someone is just messing with you. It might be UJJ cause he knows that you it makes you mad. Now calm down! Looks like I have an important call I have to answer this."
Felix closes the door and heads to the parking lot.
Both Felix Schwarz and Arnold Bold turn their attention to the arrival of the latter's manager, Manolo Ferrer. Mr. Ferrer appears irked as he approaches them.
Manolo Ferrer: "Someone is taking the time, effort and money to see that we get distracted from what we set out to do. This is completely unacceptable. This is a despicable act of exploitation."
He sternly eyes the two wrestlers.
Manolo Ferrer: "I guess the only grace we get is that someone thinks you are enough of a threat to have them spend time and money to make these videos. But they messed up. We are challenging for the titles on ULOL's big yearend event. Not bad for a makeshift team. It's time to take our game to the next level."
There is a sense of pride in the manager's words, as he leaves the two wrestlers in their dressing room.
We see Stephanie Dawson rush over with her microphone as she spots Bloodflame walking down the hallway, slowly making his way towards the entrance ramp. He spots her, and knowing that he still has some time left he stops to wait for her. She pauses next to him, putting the microphone to her lips to speak.
Stephanie Dawson: "Bloodflame, can we get a few final words from you regarding your match tonight?"
Bloodflame glances at her for a moment as she extends the mic out to him, then looks into the camera, practically boring a hole through it with the intensity in his gaze. He looks like he's wound more than a little too tight.
Bloodflame: "I'll keep this short. Time to sink or swim, Numb Nuts. Me, I intend to drown you."
Bloodflame glances back at Stephanie for a moment before he walks off, leaving her to stare after him.
The scene opens in the locker room of Nao Fook Mi where she is preparing for her match against The Stank Duo. She straps her open-fingered gloves in and turns around. The camera pans down and we see Little Wang sitting down on the floor leaning against the wall.
Nao Fook Mi: "Well Wang? This is it. Only a few more minutes until I have to face those two in the ring. So can I count on you to watch my back tonight? Knowing Stank Lord and Brostar, they probably will do something underhanded."
Fook Mi walks over to Little Wang and helps him to his feet.
Little Wang gives Fook Mi a reassuring pat.
Little Wang: "You know I always got your back Fook Mi. You're like my big little sister, anyone who dares to mess with you will get these!"
Little Wang holds both fists up in the air.
Little Wang: "Don't you worry, I will make sure that the fight will be clean. Now you go out at kick their asses, show them what our Anything Goes Martial Arts is capable of you hear?"
Nao Fook Mi smiles and looks at her friend with thankfulness.
Nao Fook Mi: "Thanks Wang, after tonight, whether I win or lose, I'll treat you to your favorite restaurant."
Fook Mi looks at her watch and breathes deeply...
Nao Fook Mi: "Well I guess it's time."
Fook Mi steels herself and exits the room with Little Wang trailing behind her as the scene fades to black.
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VS
&
Jim Jackson: "It looks like this feud has come full circle, Nao Fook Mi took on The Stank Gang by herself and now it looks like she may be paying for it."
Brad Blood: "Damn, now she'll get really fooked up. But you got to admit being a girl she sure does have more balls than anyone in the roster."
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a handicap match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first Nao Fook Mi!"
Oriental music starts playing on the background as smoke covers the mouth of the entrance tunnel. Suddenly out leaps Nao Fook Mi wearing a short cheongsam. She quickly makes her way down entrance ramp and enters the ring. She bows and gives her respect to the crowd before heading to her corner.
Jim Jackson: "The valiant Nao Fook Mi, to go against these odds, you cannot help but cheer for her."
Brad Blood: "I knew I should have tried to fook her when I had the chance."
Jasmine Lee: "And introducing her opponents, Brostar and Stank Lord, The Stank Duo!"
"This Stinks" plays as Stank Lord accompanied by Brostar make their way to the ring.
Jim Jackson: "Well it looks like the crowd is booing loudly now. We surely know which side they are on tonight."
Brad Blood: "If you were given the option to cheer for a beautiful fookable girl and 2 guys who smell like they just stepped out of a septic tank who would you choose?"
Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble!"
Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Looks like Stank Lord wants to go at Fook Mi first. Stank walks into a high dropkick from Nao Fook Mi. Second rope flying axe handle and Stank gets pummeled by the faster Fook Mi! Stank Lord tries to get up... Back heel kick from Fook Mi"
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi hooks the leg hoping for a quick win."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord kicks out of that one! Fook Mi is unrelenting with her offense and hits a flying neckbreaker on Stank! She again goes for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Stank Lord get a shoulder up. Fook Mi goes for a kick but Stank Lord grabs her leg and shoves her back to the ropes. Looks like Stank Lord is preparing for Foom Mi to come back... EEEEEEEWWW! Did he just sniff his own armpits?!"
Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi bounces back, Stank Lord with a clothesline... Fook Mi ducks under it and uses the ropes to gain momentum... Springboard crossbody!"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi still unable to put Stank Lord away. Fook Mi stands up and... What is she doing? She looks like she's searching her own body... Fook Mi just grabbed something... WAIT!!! IS THAT A TICK?!!! Don't tell me Stank Lord is also tick infested. EEEEEEEEEW!!!"
Jim Jackson: "I won't be surprised if he's a breeding ground for ticks and other parasites. Stank Lord uses the opportunity to tag in his partner. Stank Lord and Brostar whip Fook Mi into the corner. This is where Fook Mi is at a disadvantage. Stank Lord whips Brostar in for a hard clothesline to follow-up smashing into Fook Mi crushing her to the corner."
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi goes down! Brostar hooks the leg, is Fook Mi fooked?"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi kicks out and gets to fook around some more!"
Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi staggers to her feet... Brostar uses a basement dropkick to the knee sends Fook Mi to one knee. Brostar attempts a shining wizard... Shining wizard connects! Brostar picks Fook Mi up... Reverse DDT!. Stank Lord asks for a tag and gets it! Brostar and Stank whip Fook Mi into the ropes and hit a double clothesline. Stank Lord hooks the leg."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi still is able to kick out of that one! Stank Lord is not happy. Oh man... Stank Lord just scratched his hiney before licking his fingers... That is just nasty!"
Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord lifts Fook Mi for a powerbomb... Fook Mi fights her way out of it! Fook Mi jumps down from Stank Lord's shoulders and takes him down with a standing lariat! Fook Mi uses the ropes to gain momentum... She ducks under Stank Lord's clothesline and leaps into the second rope... Springboard spinning side kick sends Stank Lord back!"
Brad Blood: "Stank Lord bounces unto the ropes and right into Fook Mi who rolls him up! Will she get the win?"
Brad Blood: "EWWWWWWWWWW!!! Stank Lord just farted his way out of a three count! Fook Mi is gagging from the methane!"
Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord quickly tags in his partner again. So far Stank Lord always gets his ass handed to him when in the ring with Fook Mi and it's Brostar bailing him out. Fook Mi takes a flying neckbreaker from Brostar. Brostar leaps into the ropes... Springboard moonsault! Brostar hooks the leg."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Fook Mi is really hanging in there but the question is how much more can she take?"
Jim Jackson: "Back suplex on Fook Mi. Brostar sends Fook Mi to the corner with an Irish whip... Fook Mi counters an avalanche with a raised foot to the face. Slingshot clothesline by Fook Mi takes Brostar down! Fook Mi hooks the leg..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Brostar kicks out! He fights his way back up... Brostar stuns Fook Mi with an uppercut! He leaps to the ropes... Flying clothesline! That turned Fook Mi inside out!"
Jim Jackson: "Brostar kicks Nao Fook Mi in the gut. He then puts Nao Fook Mi's arm around his neck. Brostar lifts Nao Fook Mi up in a suplex postion. Then brings her back down and slams her with a sitdown Spinebuster hitting The Aussie Outback Blackout! Brostar for the pin."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "What the? Fook Mi got her hand on the bottom rope! She's still in the game!"
Jim Jackson: "Brostar picks Fook Mi up, wait Fook Mi slips down behind Brostar! Brostar turns around... Nao Fook Mi leaps to the top of the turnbuckle, she somersaults over her opponent who rushes in towards her landing behind her opponent who spins around right into a deadly burst kick sending her opponent crashing to the corner executing a devastating Fook Mi Special!!! Fook Mi for the pin!"
Brad Blood: "Stank Lord enters the ring to disrupt the three count... HE FALLS ON HIS FACE AS LITTLE WANG APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE AND TRIPS HIM!"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall, Nao Fook Mi!"
Brad Blood: "SHE WON! FOOK MI FOOKED THE STANK DUO!"
Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi put out a valiant fight defeated Stank Lord and his crony. Wait what is Stank Lord doing? Stank Lord blindsided Fook Mi! Stank Lord just pulled his tights down!"
Brad Blood: "He's gonna... HE'S GONNA GIVE FOOK MI A GOLDEN SHOWER!!! WAIT! Here comes Little Wang! Little Wang tries to stop Stank Lord... STANK LORD BOOTS LITTLE WANG OVER TO THE CROWD!!! Brostar tries to stop Stank Lord."
Jim Jackson: "Looks like Brostar is drawing the line there. It seems like Brostar is not too far gone as we think..."
Brad Blood: "Stank Lord shoves Brostar! He takes aim with his weenie wiener... WAIT! BROSTAR JUST ATTACKED STANK LORD FROM BEHIND!!! HE THROWS STANK LORD OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!"
Jim Jackson: "Brostar finally broke himself free of Stank Lord's chains! Brostar gauges the distance... He leaps from the ring apron... SPRINGBOARD CORKSCREW SPLASH CONNECTS! Stank Lord tries to crawl up the ramp... Brostar kicks Stank Lord in the gut. He then puts Stank Lord's arm around his neck. Brostar lifts Stank Lord up in a suplex postion. Then brings him back down and slams him with a sitdown Spinebuster hitting The Aussie Outback Blackout! Brostar just hit the A.O.B. on Stank Lord on the STEEL RAMP! Stank Lord is not moving at all!"
Brad Blood: "I think he's dead Jim. Wait EMTs are coming out to check on Stank Lord. Brostar stands on the platform on top of the ramp and raises his hands before exiting. Tsk. Looks like Stank Lord is still alive but the paramedics are putting a neck brace on him before carting him out."
Jim Jackson: "What a turn of events... Who would have thought that Brostar will finally turn on Stank Lord and save Fook Mi too."
The Morbidly Obese Man Admin
Posts : 2990 Join date : 2008-12-29 Age : 48
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Subject: Re: HanuChrisKwanbo 12/26/2010 Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:29 am
The scene opens in parking lot where we see Felix Schwarz.. He is standing in deepest corner and it looks like he is talking to someone. Felix doesn’t look very happy.
Voice: "You know that this investigation is very important to you, to me and to the whole department. You know that if you bring down Bold family you will get promotion and I get promotion, so I am saying to you to hurry up, get some dirt we can use on him. We don’t have much time."
Felix Schwarz: "What do you mean we don't have much time? I'm at a stage in the investigation where I can finally warm up to Bold. I am moving forward, me and Bold are now in a tag titles match and he is starting to trust me. Slow but surely I am gaining his trust. But I am a bit concerned that someone is messing with Arnold and it makes him paranoid. He blames everyone and asking if they kidnapped his partner Taufik. This makes my job more difficult. Noow someone started sending videos to him and explaining how he destroyed Taufik. What about your end? What about her? Did you talk to his girlfriend or his ex-bodyguard Giancarlo?"
The voice on the other side of the phone doesn't seem to pleased...
Voice: "Well things on my side seems to have caught a few snags. My agents have invited his girlfriend for interrogation but she's denying anything, I'm sure we'll break her but we'll need time. About that bodyguard, well bad news, he was found dead when we visited him at his place. Evidence says that it’s suicide. Note left at the table and gun in his hand. Still seems fishy, forensics are still looking at the evidence. We forbidden his girlfriend to call to Arnold though."
Felix Schwarz: "You know that when media will finds out, Arnold will send his lawyer and things will heat. You know that right? And then lawyer interferes you won’t get anything. GoodFella will know everything and be more suspicious and then you could ruin opportunity for us. Now tell me why we are running out of time."
The man on the other side of the phone thinks for minute and remembers what he meant by these words.
Voice: "Well we are currently doing investigation and we think that we got several dirty men in our department. The mobsters these days have many agents and cops in their pockets. So it’s only a matter of time when your identity gets leaked. So be careful out there you hear? I will try and see if we can find the traitors in our midst. Over and out.
Felix hangs up the phone as the scene fades to black.
THUMP!!! THUMP!!! THUMP!!!
The humongous wrestler also known as The Morbidly Obese Man makes his way out of the back and into the ring. He grabs a mic from a frightened stagehand and speaks to the audience.
The Morbidly Obese Man: "Well it looks like tonight, my quest for gold will finally bear fruitation! That's right! In the TLC match tonight, me and my partner who is probably jacking his Johnson right now will win the tag titles. GoodFella and Schwarz will not stand a chance."
The crowd looks on unsure whether to cheer or boo.
The Morbidly Obese Man: "Yeah, yeah, I know you all heard the I will win speeches before from a ton of other guys. Am I correct?"
The crowd nods.
The Morbidly Obese Man: "Well there's one difference in our speech, when other people give the I will win speech, their chances of winning is a 50%, when give my speech my chances of winning is at 100%! As you see I came out here tonight alone! Not with my partner because I do not want to rely on him tonight. Tonight is MY night whether "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson helps me tonight or not, I shall walk away with gold around my waist... Well on my shoulders since I doubt that belt will fit me."
The Morbidly Obese Man drops the mic and walks out to the back.
THUMP!!! THUMP!!! THUMP!!!
The ULOL Tron lights up showing Stephanie Dawson is seen knocking on Lucian's locker room door with a mic at hand. The door swings open as Lucian comes to the door with a towel wrapped around his waist.
Lucian Blackheart: "Stephanie? Come to keep me company have you?"
Lucian winks as we see Stephanie with a flattered look on here face, then quickly coughing and looking away with embarrassment.
Stephanie Dawson: "In a manor of speaking. Lucian, tell us how you feel going into your match up with Bloodflame."
Lucian moves closer to Stephanie placing his right hand up on the door frame.
Lucian Blackheart: "How bout you tell me how you feel standing this close to the man who is about to destroy Bloodflame?"
Lucian starts to sneakily tense his arms and pop his chest out flirtatiously, leaving Stephanie Dawson looking love struck.
Lucian cuts her off pulling her hand with the mic closer to his chest.
Lucian Blackheart: "Scared? Overwhelmed? Now that feeling you have right now is exactly what Bloodflame feels when he looks at Lucian 'Ace' Blackheart."
Lucian notices as Stephanie begins to feel him up he snatches her hand.
Lucian Blackheart: "What the hell are you doing, Stephanie!?"
Stephanie Dawson backing off with a shocked and slightly embarrassed look on her face.
Stephanie Dawson: I was just umm.. trying to get a feel of what Bloodflame would be feeling later on tonight."
Lucian with a puzzled and angered face snatches the mic off Stephanie Dawson.
Lucian Blackheart: "Are you implying that Bloodflame and I are lovers? He may be into that kind of homosexual shit, but I'm as straight as they come. Ask Bloodflames old flame. Zoe was it? Chleo? Yeah I think it was Chleo. See, she wasn't good the first time, or the second either. Lucky for her though, Lucian taught that bitch some tricks."
Stephanie Dawson still in shock stutters as she approaches the mic.
Stephanie Dawson: "Th-th-thank you for your time, Lucian."
Lucian hands the mic back to Stephanie Dawson and grabs a hold of her hand.
Lucian Blackheart: "Wait.. I thought you were going to keep me company? You wanna come in?"
Stephanie once again looking love struck replys.
Stephanie Dawson: More than anythi...
Lucian lets go off her hand and walks back in his locker room, slamming the door in her face. The ULOL Tron fades to black.
ZERO CALORIES!!!
ZERO SUGAR!!!
ZERO FAT!!!
Available in stores everywhere.
VS
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame and Lucian Blackheart have been at each others' throat ever since their return to ULOL, and it looks like tonight is the time that they will settle things once and for all."
Brad Blood: "Ooh! I can't wait for this one. I'm sure that this one will be... Bloody!"
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest will be a Grievous Gifts on a Pole Barbed Wire match! Introducing first Bloodflame!"
"Asylum" by Disturbed starts to play as the entrance way explodes with fire. Bloodflame walks through the fire and makes his way to the ring.
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame enters the ring. It was he who added the barbed wire stipulations in to the match."
Brad Blood: "Of course, Bloodflame is a master of pain and punishment and what else represents all of that other than barbed wires. BLOODFLAME I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOU!!!"
Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next his opponent for the evening, Lucian Blackheart!"
"Faith Love Hope" by Starsailor blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with smoke. Red spotlights scatter around the arena and follow Lucian Blackheart as he makes his way to the ring posing and interacting with the fans.
Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart makes his appearance. Lucian was the one who threw down the gauntlet for this match, will this be the a moment of glory for him or will he regret his decision?"
Brad Blood: "Hah! Bloodflame will eat him alive!"
Jasmine Lee: "The referee for the match is Don. Q. Hotte. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"
Jim Jackson: "Well the set up of the ring has 4 poles on each corner, each pole has a gift on top which contains a weapon. The outside of the ring has barbed wires strewn all over so falling outside will be dangerous. And there's the bell! Lucian Blackheart jumps up to one pole right off the bat! He quickly scampers up while Bloodflame gives chase."
Brad Blood: "Ack! Lucian Blackheart reaches the top of the pole first and gets the gift, it's a... Baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire!?!"
Jim Jackson: "Lucky break from Blackheart. He quickly jumps down and takes a swing at Bloodflame narrowly missing him! Blackheart goes for a swing again but Bloodflame sidesteps and makes it behind him. German suplex by Bloodflame sends Blackheart to the canvas! Bloodflame quickly picks the barbed wire bat..."
Brad Blood: "Ooh... Look at that grin... Go get him Bloodflame! Make him BLEED! Bloodflame lifts the bat up... NOOOOOO!!!"
Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart with a low blow and Bloodflame looses his grip on the bat and clutches his groin. Blackheart with an Irish whip sends Bloodflame to the ropes. He quickly picks up the baseball bat... He swings..."
Brad Blood: "STTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRIKKKKKE! WOOT! He missed Bloodflame by a country mile! He comes Bloodflame bouncing back... SPEAR!!! Bloodflame takes the bat he takes a swing!"
Jim Jackson: "Blackheart rolls out of the way! Blackheart leaps up to his feet and then dashes to the corner. He leaps up to the pole and tries to climb up... Bloodflame gives chase! Blackheart kicks Bloodflame off... Flying elbow by Blackheart! The bat slides out of Bloodflame's hands and under the bottom rope into the outside!"
Brad Blood: "Ack! Now it's out of reach on those barbed wires! Lucian Blackheart again climbs up the pole. He reaches the gift and opens it... It's a... FLAT IRON?!"
Jim Jackson: "Blackheart leaps from the top of the pole and smashes the flat iron unto Bloodflame! Bloodflame got his arms up in time but that must still hurt. Blackheart uses the cord of the flat iron and wraps it around Bloodflame's neck! He's trying to choke out Bloodflame!"
Brad Blood: "Bloodflame runs backwards and slams Blackheart into the corner! Blackheart's grip looses and Bloodflame wrests the flat iron from Blackheart! WOO! GO BLOODFLAME!"
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame hols the flat iron by the cord and starts to swing it above his head. He is using the cord to make the flat iron into a long ranged weapon. He whips the flat iron and it hits Blackheart on the side! Lucian Blackheart walks into a stiff lariat clothesline from Bloodflame. Hip toss by Bloodflame sends Blackheart down! Blackheart may have injured his ribs when that flat iron hit."
Brad Blood: "Well he should just give up now and save himself more pain and punishment. Bloodflame raises the flat iron over his head. NO!!! Damn that Blackheart!"
Jim Jackson: "Blackheart manages to roll away and pokes Bloodflame in the eye! Blackheart swipes the flat iron out of Bloodflames reach and smashes it into Bloodflame's head! Blackheart with a drop kick... BLOODFLAME GOES OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!."
Brad Blood: "Wait! Bloodflame hangs on and lands safely into the apron. Blackheart comes charging in... WOO! Bloodflame with a shoulder in between the ring ropes stops him! Bloodflame quickly enters the ring."
Jim Jackson: "Side suplex on Blackheart! Bloodflame has control again. He grabs Lucian Blackheart and hits a DDT right over the flat iron! Blackheart is cut! Bloodflame positions Blackheart over the flat iron... PILEDRIVER ON TOP OF THE FLAT IRON!!! Bloodflame hooks the leg."
Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "What?! How could he kick out of that?! That stupid ref may have been counting too slow."
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame lifts Lucian Blackheart over his shoulders... Blackheart slips down! Russian leg sweep on Bloodflame right on the flat iron! Talk about payback! Lucian Blackheart uses the opportunity to quickly climb up the third pole. What instrument of horror will it wield this time?"
Brad Blood: "HOLY CRAP!!! IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?!"
Jim Jackson: "It's a... POTTY TRAINER?!"
Brad Blood: "Lucian Blackheart looks at the potty trainer not believing that it was inside the box. Blackheart looks at the box again thinking it must be a joke."
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame shakes the pole! Blackheart loses his grip and plummets to the mat with the potty trainer in hand..."
KLONK!
Jim Jackson: "In a stroke of luck Blackheart's potty trainer smashes into Bloodflame's head on his way down! Both men are down on the canvas! The potty trainer broken in half."
Brad Blood: "Well it could be worse, at least that potty trainer is brand new and not yet used. The referee starts counting."
Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"
Jim Jackson: "Looks like both men are starting to stir."
Don Q. Hotte: "Four! Five! Six!"
Brad Blood: "C'mon Bloodflame get up first! Bloodflame uses the ropes to prop himself up..."
Don Q. Hotte: "Seven! Eight! Nine!"
Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart is also up! He charges straight at Bloodflame... BLOODFLAME PULLS DOWN THE TOP ROPE AND BLACKHEART GOES OVER!!! WAIT BLACKHEART LANDS FEET FIRST ON THE STEEL RAILINGS AND LEAPS INTO THE CROWD INSTEAD SAFE FROM THE BARBED WIRES!"
Brad Blood: "Blackheart grabs a chair and places it on top of the barbed wires, he uses it as a stepping stone to leap back into the ring apron! Here comes Bloodflame!"
Jim Jackson: "Blackheart dodges the clothesline attempt and hits a springboard flying knee on Bloodflame! Blackheart sees the flat iron on the canvas, he slams it into the side of Bloodflame's head! Bloodflame goes down! Blackheart for the cover."
Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Bloodflame gets a shoulder up! Lucian climbs the last pole. Looks like he's going for the last gift. What could it be? IT'S A BOX FULL OF TACKS!!! Blackheart takes the box and empties the tacks on the mat."
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame takes a wild swing missing Blackheart who kicks him in the gut and DDTs Bloodflame right unto the tack! OH! Bloodflame's head is a pin cushion! Bloodflame screams in pain as Blackheart picks him up... Blackheart tries to toss Bloodflame over the top rope... Attempt somehow blocked by Bloodflame!"
Brad Blood: "Bloodflame with a couple of hard shots at Blackheart softens him up. Bloodflame picks Lucian up... POWERBOMB OVER THE TOP ROPE AND INTO THE BARBED WIRES!!! WOO!!! LUCIAN GETS CAUGHT IN THE BARBED WIRES AND GETS CUT UP!!!"
Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame uses this chance to pluck out the tacks stuck on his forehead. Lucian Blackheart manages to get untangled from the barbed wires but the damage has been done. His body is full of cuts and gashes. Blackheart climbs into the ring apron... Bloodflame picks him up and throws him over the top rope and into the tacks! Blackheart screams in agony as those tacks dig deep into his back. Bloodflame forces his opponent onto the mat and locks him in a cobra clutch executing a devastating Crippler! Bloodflame has his submission locked in!"
Brad Blood: "He has Lucian where he wants him! It's only a matter of time... LUCIAN TAPS!!! LUCIAN IS TAPPING! The ref is calling for the bell!"
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via submission, Bloodflame!"
Jim Jackson: "And with that, this bloody feud has come to an end. Bloodflame stands victorious in the ring. A smile creeps along his blood covered face. Stagehands are clearing the barbed wires making way for the EMT to enter the ring as Bloodflame celebrates his win."
Brad Blood: "Now this is what I call a match. It's like I'm in orgasmic bliss."
Jim Jackson: "The question now is what's next for these two men? I'm sure we'll see Blackheart again soon."
The Morbidly Obese Man Admin
Posts : 2990 Join date : 2008-12-29 Age : 48
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Subject: Re: HanuChrisKwanbo 12/26/2010 Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:30 am
The scene opens to a locker room. It looks identical to all the other locker rooms of the ULOL. The camera starts to pan to the left, past all the lockers until it stops on a man wearing a signature classy black designer tuxedo. A duffle bag lies beside him on the bench of which he sits upon. His head is bowed over a book, he seems to be unaware of the camera's presence until the cameraman taps him on the shoulder.
Alexander Conway: "It's about time you arrived."
Alexander sets the book down onto the bench. The camera gets a quick look of the title while Alexander stands up: Controversy Creates Ca$h. Alexander begins speaking again while fixing his tie with his back to the camera.
Alexander Conway: "Tonight, after Stephanie so rudely left me for the masked wonder, I took it upon myself to speak to you people without her."
Alexander finally turns to around to face the camera.
Alexander Conway: "Tonight, I get the "privilege" of fighting for the Ligero Maximo championship. Like I've said before, this title is a consolation prize. I don't want or need a title that is only made for a certain weight class. I want to prove that I am the best in the world, winning a title only lightweights can compete for isn't going to do shit for my career. Am I still going to try and win? Of course. I want to show that I'm better than two men who almost won the Primo Ultimo Championship."
Alexander puts one foot onto the bench and rests his arms over his knee.
Alexander Conway: "But that's the thing, it ends there. I'll throw the Ligero Maximo title off a bridge, that's how fucking irrelevant it is to me. This federation, other than a select few, is full of shit. Drunk guys, farmers, a fat-ass, two stink bags, a kid, an over-hyped stoppable loser, and a bunch of dudes who don't know what the hell they're doing in that ring are what populate this place. The only way I can face, and defeat, the good ones is if I win that Primo Ultimo championship."
Alexander walks to the door of his locker room. He grasps the door knob, turns it, and pulls the door open.
Alexander Conway: "Where do I go from there once I've defeated those select few? Well, we'll just have to wait and see, won't we?"
With that, Alexander motions for the cameraman to go as the scene fades to black.
Footage of the aftermath of the Campeónes Compañero contenders' match begin to play. We find Arnold Bold, Felix Schwarz and Manolo Ferrer backstage. The world-famous manager is checking on his men after they successfully qualified for the championship match. He does not look very happy.
He gives GoodFella a strong pat on the shoulder, before turning to face the camera.
Manolo Ferrer: "In case you missed it, Mr. Bold and Mr. Schwarz have shown their quality by qualifying for the Campeónes Compañero championship. They took the challenge head on, and are now just one step away from wearing gold. But today, we also saw how far our opposition will go to make sure Mr. Bold and Mr. Schwarz did not qualify for the title match."
Mr. Ferrer elaborates.
Manolo Ferrer: "The video that was played during the contenders' match was a clear attempt to distract Mr. Bold and Mr. Schwarz, in an underhanded bid to remove them from the championship altogether. I suppose that should be expected from a team who wants to make sure they get the titles. So sorry that your plan didn't work out. I could accuse the Stank Lord, or Jack Johnson, or the Morbidly Obese Man for putting out that distraction, but that's irrelevant. GoodFella and Mr. Schwarz are just one match away from becoming the Campeónes Compañero. That tastelessly made fake video did not work. All Mr. Bold and Mr. Schwarz have to do now, is to make sure that Jack Johnson and the Morbidly Obese Man continue to be empty-handed in 2011."
The GoodFella and Felix Schwarz stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Mr. Ferrer.
Sr. Gonzalez and this guy Casanueva are in Gonzalez's private gym. They've just finished a long training for Gonzalez's match at the PPV. Now they are resting.
Casanueva: "So, that was pretty good."
Sr. Gonzalez: "Sure it was. I'm gonna win the title."
Casanueva: "Yeah, I bet you'll do. You are definitely much better than when we were in school."
He laughs. Gonzalez doesn't.
Casanueva: "Oh yeah, there's something I wanted to tell you. It seems that another Chilean will join ULOL very soon. Everyone in Chile is very excited about it."
Sr. Gonzalez: "And how come I haven't heard of it?"
Casanueva: "Hehe, a lot of Chileans see the fact that you are here as an oportunity to join this federation. But anyways, I'm talking about certain person here, and most people don't know he's coming."
Gonzalez doesn't seem much interested.
Sr. Gonzalez: "Who is it?"
Casanueva: "Ever heard about a wrestler named Meteoro? He was Chilean too, and used to be in ULOL in the old days. He was lightweight champion once I think. He was a pretty weird dude."
Sr. Gonzalez: "Meteoro? I have no idea who he is. So that means he isn't important and I don't care about him."
The camera fades to black as they keep talking.
&
VS
&
Brad Blood: "WHOA!!! They we will next watch the next match from the uncleaned toilet which Stank Lord frequents! OHMIGAWD!!! Is that crap on the walls and ceiling?! How the hell did it get there?!"
Jim Jackson: "It looks like both teams shall battle in the unclean toilet... A stipulation decided upon last week. Thank god we are watching the match on the ULOL Tron instead of live."
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is a Toilet Lavatory and Crap tag team match scheduled for one fall and is for the ULOL Campeónes Compañero! Introducing first the team of Arnold "GoodFella" Bold and Felix Schwarz, GoodFella and Schwarz!"
Arnold "GoodFella" Bold and Felix Schwarz enter the toilet almost gagging at the sight and foul odor emanating from it.
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella and Schwarz look like they are not pleased with the setting of the match."
Brad Blood: "How could someone mess up a toilet that bad? Is that a hand print made out of crap on the mirror?"
Jasmine Lee: "And their opponents for tonight, The Morbidly Obese Man and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson, Morbidly Unstoppable!"
The Morbidly Obese Man and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson swallowed hard before entering the designated toilet.
Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"
Jim Jackson: "Looks like it's TMOM and GoodFella starting off for their teams, UJJ and Schwarz shall wait in the last cubicle unless tagged in. And TMOM starts off! The Morbidly Obese Man hits some punches. The Morbidly Obese Man with a spinning neckbreaker on GoodFella."
Brad Blood: "EWW! Both TMOM and GoodFella smears themselves on the pee and crap covered floor... Wait did I hear floor tiles cracking?! TMOM hooks the leg! The ref comes in wearing a full body protective suit and starts counting."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella kicks out! GoodFella blocks a hip toss attempt. H leaps into the lavatory and uses it to get some air time! Flying shoulder tackle sends TMOM crashing into a clogged and overflowing toilet! TMOM gets up and rips the toilet seat throwing it at GoodFella's head!"
Brad Blood: "GoodFella dodges and charges in... HE SLIPS ON SOME POOP ON THE FLOOR AND SKIDS RIGHT INTO TMOM'S BOOT! TMOM grabs GoodFella in an upside-down position... HE DUNKS GOODFELLA INTO THE TOILET! EEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!"
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella gags as TMOM applies a bear hug... GoodFella slaps TMOM on the ears! TMOM loses his grip and GoodFella with a Russian leg sweep sends TMOM ehad first into the toilet!"
Brad Blood: "EEEEEEW! The toilet cracks and the contents spill into the floor! That is so disgusting!"
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella tags in his partner... Felix Schwarz climbs to the top of the cubicle and leaps..."
Brad Blood: "TMOM CATCHES HIM AND SLAMS HIM INTO THE CUBICLE WALL! TMOM grabs Schwarz... Irish whip right into the lavatory sink! Oh that has got to hurt."
Jim Jackson: "TMOM picks Schwarz up... HE RAMS SCHWARZ INTO THE MIRROR SHATTERING IT! TMOM turns around and tries to tag in his partner who seems to be running away from his hand! UJJ doesn't want to touch his soiled partner!"
Brad Blood: "Schwarz uses this time to tag GoodFella back in! GoodFella leaps on top of the cubicle... Flying shoulder tackles sends TMOM back!"
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella grabs TMOM's head... AND SMASHES IT INTO THE URINAL! GoodFella for the cover..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "TMOM throws GoodFella off of him! TMOM crawls to his partner who again is avoiding his crap covered hands. It seems like TMOM can't get a tag..."
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella and Schwarz may be able to win this match yet. GoodFella goes in for the kill... TMOM whacks him on the head with a toilet seat! Standing clothesline almost takes GoodFella's head off! GoodFella tries to reach out for a tag. TMOM attacks Schwarz and slams Schwarz's head through a cubicle door!"
Brad Blood: "Looks like TMOM is in control again. He picks GoodFella up and loses his grip due to the slippery poo covering both wrestlers."
Jim Jackson: "GoodFella with a series of low kicks to TMOM's shin sends the big man down to one knee! Dropkick sends the big man down! GoodFella climbs up the lavatory counter top... Flying legdrop connects! He hooks the leg."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "TMOM still kicks out! GoodFella sees a loose urinal and pries it off the wall! He lifts the urinal over TMOM... Wait is that an intern wheeling a flat screen TV into the area?!"
Jim Jackson: "What the? It's another message again. GoodFella looks at the screen with wide-eyes... TMOM swipes the urinal from GoodFella and breaks it over his head! The Morbidly Obese Man shoves his opponent down unto the mat, he leaps up into the air and sits down on them with such force crushing them to the canvas and pinning them to the mat executing a morbidly horrifying Massive Sit Down!!! TMOM for the pin..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match via pinfall and your NEW ULOL Campeónes Compañero, The Morbidly Obese Man and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson... Morbidly Unstoppable!"
Jim Jackson: "TMOM takes advantage of the distraction and gets an epic win for Morbidly Unstoppable!"
Brad Blood: "UJJ did nothing, not that I blame him, no one in his right mind would tag a crap covered hand."
Jim Jackson: "The new titles are being handed to the tag champs. UJJ quickly accepts his title and distances himself from the mess... WHAT THE?! UJJ JUST WENT LIMP! Someone attacks UJJ from behind!"
Brad Blood: "IT'S... IT'S TAUFIK!!! TAUFIK HAS MADE A RETURN HERE TONIGHT! HE JUST BLINDSIDED UJJ WITH HIS SINGAPOREAN CANE! NOW HE BREAKS THE CANE OVER TMOM'S HEAD!!! Could it be... The video..."
Jim Jackson: "The video is about the death of the old Taufik and the birth of a new Taufik."
Brad Blood: "That means no more gay Taufik then huh?"
Jim Jackson: "Well it looks like Taufik makes an impact on his return tonight, what will it spell for GoodFella? How will Morbidly Unstoppable react to this attack after they regain consciousness? A lot of questions are left unresolved..."
Long lines are seen queuing up under the sweltering heat, at a local movie theater. Hawkers are briskly selling cold drinks and snacks, as people wait for the theater to start taking in patrons. It is hard not to find someone in the line who is not wearing a mask, or wearing a shirt or other piece of clothing that does not feature the mask of the man they have all come to see.
He is none other than the masked maven of the ring, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.
A reporter's voice is heard, as the people wait patiently in the queue.
Reporter: "They have waited all day to get into the theater. Many have put their schedules, if not their lives, on hold for this day, as soon as they heard the official announcement. They have come to watch their national hero, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing, challenge for championship gold."
The reporter is seen interviewing various people in the queue.
Random Man: [I postponed my wedding date so I can watch this glorious match. I'll have to look for a new girlfriend after today, but that's a small price to pay.]
Another Random Man: [I had to postpone church services today so the congregation can watch this glorious match. I've been asked by the bishop to resign because of it, but fuck that faggot. This is an important day.]
Reporter: [What do you think of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's chances in this match?]
Woman In Queue: [I think he has a very good chance of winning. He is taking on an old man, and from what I heard he has poor health. I expect nothing less than Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing to win it all.]
Woman's Companion: [I worked in Chile before. I can tell you that Gonzales is not popular even in his own country. A lot of people suspect he was friends with Pinochet. That's why he's so rich.]
As if on cue, several people in the line begin a chant in Spanish, even though their native language is not Spanish.
Two men enthusiastically urinate on a Chilean flag nearby as more people join in on the chanting.
Reporter: "I see you've made no secret of your feelings towards one of the competitors against Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing. What do you think of Alexander Conway's chances?"
Silence is the first answer as the crowd stares dumbfounded at the foreign reporter for several moments.
Random Man: [Who?]
Another Random Man: [It's a triple threat match?]
Yet Another Random Man: [No one told me about this. The ULOL signed Rob Conway?]
And Still Another Random Woman: [It's probably a thug hired by that mean old Gonzales!]
And with that, the crowd lining up at the theater breaks out into another anti-Gonzales chant.
Subject: Re: HanuChrisKwanbo 12/26/2010 Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:31 am
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VS
VS
Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is a cage match for the Ligero Maximo championship! The winner is the first man to score a pinfall or escape from the cage, and land with both feet at ringside!"
The audience cheers over the prospect of much violence and bloodshed. The cheers get more wody when nu-metal music begins to play, as a highlight reel of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing runs on the ULOLTron. A horde of reporters and photographers gather at the stage entrance, taking pictures and giving a blow by blow of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's every move as he steps out for his match. Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing waves to the fans as he slowly makes his way to the ring.
Jasmine Lee: "The first challenger, making his way to the ring, is none other than Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"
"Hunt You Down" by Saliva blares throughtout the arena as Alexander Conway makes his way to the ring.
Jasmine Lee: "His opponent! Approaching the ring, here is Alexander Conway!"
Some doors slide widening the entrance tunnel, making it big enough for Sr. Gonzalez extra long limousine to come through. It drives towards the ring, where Gonzalez, wearing a big and expensive coat, and his two bodyguards come down. The bodyguards go wait ringside, while Gonzalez climbs into the ring. He takes of his coat to reveal a not-so-bad body for his age.
Jasmine Lee: "Their opponent! Heading to the ring, here is Sr. Gonzales!"
Jim Jackson: "Sr. Gonzales completes the three-man cast competing for the Ligero Maximo championship. These men each have something to prove tonight."
Brad Blood: "They want to prove it badly enough to fight it out in a steel cage."
Jim Jackson: "The cage is being lowered onto the ring. The rules are simple. Either pin one of your opponents for the three, or get out of the cage and make it out to ringside, one way or the other."
Brad Blood: "All sorts of mayhem can happen in there. Any of them can get tossed into the cold steel bars. Attempts to escape the cage could end with a hard tumble back into the ring. The price to pay for winning the Ligero Maximo may be too brutal for any of them, and they might not really realize it until they've already paid the price."
Jim Jackson: "Alexander Conway has stated repeatedly he thinks he would rather compete for the Primo Ultimo, but that has not stopped him from taking part in this championship match."
Brad Blood: "A title is still a title. Conway would be a fool to outright refuse to compete for it."
Jim Jackson: "Sr. Gonzales and Q too were gunning for the Primo Ultimo title currently in the possession of Shogun. Despite their respective setbacks, becoming Ligero Maximo champion will help shine a spotlight on the winner. Becoming Ligero Maximo under the brutal environment of a steel cage match will be no cakewalk."
Brad Blood: "Which would be what the fans are looking forward to".
Jim Jackson: "I have to wonder how someone Sr. Gonzales' age can cope with the very physical demands of this match. He may have spent heavily getting the right people to prepare him for this big match, but it doesn't change the fact that he's an old man. Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing and Alex Conway could very well try to take Gonzales out early, before focusing on each other."
Brad Blood: "What makes you so sure about that? Gonzales and Conway could end up double teaming Q till he's a brown spot on the mat. This environment is the type of place a guy with Q's skills can excel in. Q and Sr. Gonzales can wind up trying to take Conway out of the equation quickly, too."
Jim Jackson: "It's certainly going to be a crapshoot in this three-way cage match."
Suddenly, the feed is replaced by the sight and sound of static.
The static fills the screen for a long time. When the signal is restored, we see one man hopping off the cage wall, to land on his feet on the outside.
Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match, and the NEW Ligero Maximo Champion...Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"
Jim Jackson: "That was an INCREDIBLE match!"
Brad Blood: "I am so out of breath just watching it!"
Jim Jackson: "I counted six or seven times you telling me that one of these three competitors was dead!"
Brad Blood: "Hey, I can't be right all the time! They took some really insane moves in this title match!"
Jim Jackson: "Gonzales and Conway brought their A game! Both men had great chances to win the Ligero Maximo, but in the end it is Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing who manages to outsmart and out-wrestle his opponents to take the championship!"
Brad Blood: "But just barely! He got thoroughly banged around like a pinball by Conway and Gonzales!"
Jim Jackson: "With the amount of blood and effort they put into this match, I wouldn't be surprised to see either Conway or Gonzales chase Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing for another crack at becoming Ligero Maximo! But for this night, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing has bragging rights over them! Tonight, he is the Ligero Maximo Champion!"
Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing raises a tired arm, as the referee helps strap the title around his waist.
The Scene opens with Ray Kamaura in the locker room where he slowly unrolls tape around his wrist. The Door opens and to Ray's surprise it is Stephanie and her cameraman. Ray sets down his tape and picks a bottle and takes a drink.
Stephanie Dawson: "Ray, if I may, I would like an interview with you."
Stephaine holds the mic up to Ray Kamaura waiting for a reply. Ray moves around and suffles alittle bit before he replies.
Ray Kamaura: "Sure, I don't see why not. I love to get some camera time for the fans."
Stephaine Looks up at Ray with a sign of interest and asks the first question.
Stephanie Dawson: "Ok. Ray How do you feel now that you are the ULOL's number one contender for the Primo Ultimo Championship?"
Ray starts to rub his chin as he thinks of a way to response to the question.
Ray Kamaura: "Well, Stephanie, it really is a surreal feeling that I finally get another shot to accomplish my dream. Last week I fought in the squared circle, for the fans, with two of the ULOL's best. UJJ and Bloodflame. I must say that they really did a number on me. I can still hear and feel that bill ringing upside the back of my skull. But Thanks to a mistake Bloodflame made earlier that night I won the match. You know what they say about payback. I showed that even the new guy can throw his weight around and earn some respect."
Stephanie looks shocked and continues to ask Ray another question.
Stephanie Dawson: "How do you plan to deal with the "Demonic God" Shogun tonight?"
Ray Kamaura: "Well, that's a tough one, Shogun is an undefeated Champion. Not to mention a very great competitor. But He, as a champion, has a huge target on his back... and I'm gonna hit it hard. Demonic God or not he needs to realize that I stand 7 feet tall and weight 350 pounds. If he thinks he can win tongiht he must have forgotten that I am a mountain of a man. I am a wall that will not be moved."
Stephanie seems to be satisfied with what Ray has said. She turns to walk away when Ray lightly grabs her shoulder. Ray spins her around and asks her a question.
Ray Kamaura: "Let me ask you a question. Have you ever heard the Legend of the Warrior?"
Stephanie Dawson: "Well no I haven't."
Stephanie seems very interested and raises the mic to Ray and awaits for the telling of The Legend of the Warrior.
Ray Kamaura: "Well it's more like a poem and it goes like this.
Once upon a time in a forlorn land, a man on a mission was left at fates hand In his eyes you could see the whites turn red Surrounded by evil, abandoned for dead
Born on the run by the sign of the sun A mail-clad warrior, the chosen one His name's been cursed, he is bound to fail A wandering spirit with the will to prevail
By the sign of the moon, he swore the oath to fight alone With a gaze that turned everything into stone the warrior spoke, "I am the one"
Fight with your heart, and you're Destined For Glory But fight without honor, and you're destined to fall Fight with your heart, and you're Destined For Glory But fight without soul and you will loose it all"
Stephanie looked at Ray with a new found respect.
Stephanie Dawson: "Wow. Its another riveting story from our number one contender Ray Kamaura."
The scene fades to black.
The scene opens with the camera following Stephanie Dawson making her way through the back. She can be seen stopping Shogun who seemed to be on his way to the ring with the Primo Ultimo title over his shoulder. Dawson waves the camera man over as she begins to speak to Shogun.
Stephanie Dawson: "Excuse me Shogun but I was wondering if I could get an interview with you about our title defense tonight."
Shogun stares at Stephanie as if she was missing something
Shogun: "Of course Miss Dawson do I not always have time for an interview with you? Ask away please."
Stephanie Dawson: "Okay well first off what are your thoughts about your match do you have any doubts going into the match?"
Shogun: "No I do not. In fact I feel that tonight is just another match with the title on the line. In fact even better is the fact that I am only fighting a single opponent instead of multiple ones like Troy seems to love forcing me to do."
Stephanie Dawson: "Speaking of that single opponent what are your thoughts on Ray Kamaura? Do you think he represents a threat to your belt now or in the future?"
Shogun: "Let me put it this way Miss Dawson...If you have ever heard the story of Humpty Dumpty you will know that he ended up having a great fall. Well you see Humpty Dumpty obviously had to work very hard to get up to the wall he was sitting on just like Mr. Kamaura has. Well I must say that no matter how much work Humpty Dumpty put into his climb to the top of that wall he still had a great fall and no one could help him when he hit the ground."
Stephanie Dawson: "I think I understand what your saying there. Do you think Ray Kamaura has any chance of knocking you off of your perch tonight instead of the latter?"
Shogun: "Miss Dawson as much as I would love to say that Ray will fulfill his Cinderella story tonight and defeat me for this belt I will not lose. Humpty Dumpty did not have a happy ending and neither will this fairy tale...You see tonight Ray Kamaura is going to find that at the top of the wall he climbed to get this far is a Demonic God who is going to cause him to take a great fall and when he does I do not intend for any of the kings horses or the kings men to be able to put Ray Kamaura back together again...
Stephanie looks at Shogun with concern in her eyes.
Stephanie Dawson: "Are you saying that you intend to end Ray Kamaura`s career tonight Shogun?"
Shogun: "Of course not Miss Dawson I only plan to do whatever it takes to keep this belt over my shoulder and if that means Ray has to be hurt for it to happen then so be it...because I do not have someone to go home and spend my Christmas with this year like you or anyone else in this arena the ONLY thing I live for now is this title. So when I defend it I will do ANYTHING and I mean anything to keep it Miss Dawson. Now I must now excuse myself because I have a title defense to prepare for. Thank you for providing another interesting interview I look forward to our next encounter."
Shogun takes a bow and heads towards the ring area as Stephanie looks on in confusion and even a little pity.
Stephanie Dawson: "Very strong words from the Primo Ultimo champion back to you guys at the booth."
VS
Jim Jackson: "And now for our main event of the evening. Ray Kamaura will be challenging Shogun for the title. Will Shogun retain or will we see a new champion?"
Brad Blood: "Hah, I predict Shogun will just mop the floor with Kamaura, he doesn't stand a chance."
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is a thirty minute Iron Man match and is for the ULOL Primo Ultimo title! Introducing first the challenger, let us welcome Ray Kamaura!"
"Life is Beautiful" by Sixx AM blares throughtout the arena and when the lyrics start to play Ray Kamaura makes his way to the ring very slowly.
Jim Jackson: "Here comes Ray Kamaura, does he have what it takes to dethrone Shogun? Kamaura bested two other men to take this coveted spot."
Brad Blood: "No chance Jim. Shogun has beaten every challenger for that title, guys even tougher than Kamaura."
Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next, he's your ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion, Shogun!"
"A Victim, A Target" by Misery Signals blasts though the arena speakers ans the lights begin to flash on and off. As the lyrics begin Shogun bursts from behind the curtains with fire erupting from the ramp beside him. Shogun begins to make his way to the ring with a look of pure intensity on his face. as he makes it to the ring he runs up and rolls into the ring the expression on his face unchanged.
Jim Jackson: "And the champ makes his entrance."
Brad Blood: "And he'll probably make his exit still the champ."
Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"
Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! The match begins, whoever gets the most pinfalls at the end of thirty minutes will be walking out with the gold! Both men clash and Back elbow by Kamaura connects, Shogun staggers backward. Powerslam from Ray Kamaura he quickly hooks the leg."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "It'll take more than that to put the champ away. Shogun kicks out at two and fights his way back up to his feet."
Jim Jackson: "Irish whip by the challenger sends Shogun to the corner with an Irish whip. Shogun smashes into the turnbuckles hard. Kamaura comes charging in... Shogun avoids an avalanche, Ray Kamaura hits the turnbuckles hard. Back suplex on Kamaura by Shogun. Kamaura quickly stands up... Shogun gets him from behind... German suplex! Shogun for the pin..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Kamaura is able to kick out of that one. Shogun continues his assault."
Jim Jackson: "Stiff chops sends Kamaura to the ropes. Shogun lands a hard right followed by a European uppercut. A kick to the guy sets Kamaura up for a powerbomb. Shogun folds Kamaura in half with that one. The champ goes for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Dang, Kamaura is still able to kick out of that one. He should just stay down and prevent any more misery."
Jim Jackson: "Shogun sets Kamaura up, he hits a stun gun! Kamarua staggers back. Shogun grabs Kamaura from behind. Kamaura reverses the waistlock... Atomic drop! Kamaura quickly grabs Shogun by the head... He plants him with a DDT! That used to be a legit finisher."
Brad Blood: "Damn, Kamaura got lucky there. Wait he's climbing up the turnbuckles... Kamaura flies!"
Jim Jackson: "Flying double axe handle smashes into Shogun's forehead. Shogun goes down again! Kamaura hits an elbow drop and quickly goes for the cover. Shogun gets a shoulder up before the ref could even start the three count! Shogun starts to fight back up... "
Brad Blood: "Wah! They lock arms and engaged each other in a test of strength. It looks pretty even right now, neither wrestler giving way."
Jim Jackson: "Wait Shogun is slowly pushing Kamaura back... No! Kamaura halts Shogun's advance and is now gaining the upperhand... Shogun breaks it off and throws a big right... Kamaura dodges and hits a tornado punch! Sidewalk slam by Kamaura! Ray Kamaura goes for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Shogun gets out at two! Shogun quickly rolls away and distances himself before Ray Kamaura can follow-up... Smart tactic by the champ."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura lunges for the champ's legs, but Shogun spins out behind Kamaura and grabs him from behind. Stiff elbows by Kamaura to the side of Shogun's head loosens the champ's grip. Body slam by Kamaura! Kamaura drives Shogun back with some punches. Jaw breaker from the champ stops Kamaura's attack!"
Brad Blood: "Shogun lifts Kamaura up on his shoulders... No Kamaura escapes!"
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura lifts Shogun up... This time Shogun slips away! The champ again has Kamaura up on his shoulders.... Samaon drop! The champ ain't done. He has Kamaura in a headlock and starts to land heavy punches down on Kamaura!."
Brad Blood: "Shogun releases the headlock and climbs up the turnbuckles. Haha! Shogun leaps... NOOOO!!! Kamaura rolls away! Damn it!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun hits nothing but canvas! Kamaura gets the champ back to his feet and starts landing blows sending the champ staggering back. Spinning heel kick by Kamaura connects. Kamaura goes for an arm wringer... Shogun counters with hard elbows to Kamaura's head!"
Brad Blood: "Kamaura is seeing stars... OH!!! A clothesline from hell by the champ almost takes Kamaura's head off! Shogun for the cover!"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Jim Jackson: "Shogun still unable to put Kamaura away! This match is so far pretty even. Kamaura is actually holding his own against the champ. Shogun scores with a released tiger suplex on Kamaura. Shogun stands over Ray Kamaura who is lying on the mat face up and grasps his leg, Shogun then does a spinning toe hold and grasps the other leg, crossing them into a four locking in the Demonic Reckoning! Shogun locks in his finisher! Kamaura quickly taps rather than fight it out conserving his energy. The referee calls for the bell."
Brad Blood: "That's 1-0 in favor of the champ! WOO! Now Kamaura is at a disadvantage."
Jim Jackson: "The ref resets the fighters and the match continues. Ten minutes has passed only twenty minutes left in the clock, can Kamaura make a comeback? Ray Kamaura dodges Shogun's kick and hits with a spinning back elbow! A knee to the head sends the champ back. Kamaura charges in... SPEAR! Shogun goes down! Kamaura for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Brad Blood: "Shogun gets out at two. He still has the lead, Kamaura better has something better than a spear if he wants to even the score."
Jim Jackson: "Arm drag takes Shogun down again. Kamaura with a leg drop. He misses! Shogun connects with a Mongolian chop! Kamaura answers back with a knee to the gut! Irish whip by Kamaura... Shogun is sent flying with a back body drop. Ray Kamaura grabs Shogun by the neck. Ray Kamaura then lifts Shogun up and slams Shogun to the ground executing a Game Changer. Kamaura for the pin..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "Whew, that was a close one I thought that Kamaura had it there."
Jim Jackson: "Shogun battles out but it seems that the Game Changer did some damage. Irish whip by Kamaura and Shogun slams into the turnbuckles chest first. Shogun stumbles backwards... Kamaura rolls him up."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "Kick out by the champ! That's still a close one."
Jim Jackson: "Standing lariat floors the champ! Snake eyes by the challenger connects! Shogun somehow stumbles back to his feet. Snapmare takes him down again! Ray Kamaura grabs Shogun by the neck. Ray Kamaura then lifts Shogun up and slams Shogun to the ground executing a Game Changer. Kamaura hooks the leg..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Brad Blood: "What?! NO! That was a FLUKE! A FLUKE!!!"
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura evens the score! The referee again resets both wrestlers... Shogun looks like he's still suffering from the effects of two Game Changers. Kamaura grabs Shogun and Irish whips him to the ropes... He telegraphs a back body drop and Shogun counters with a kick to the face! Backbreaker by Shogun! He quickly hooks the leg.
Jim Jackson: "Shogun sends Kamaura to the ropes with an Irish whip... He knocks Kamaura down with a flying shoulder block! Kamaura gets back up and walks right into a dropkick by the champ. Shogun with a series of angry stomps grounds Kamaura. Shogun climbs to the top..."
Brad Blood: "Here comes the champ... Flying leg drop smashes right into Kamaura's chest! Haha! This could be it! Shogun for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura denies Shogun the point. Shogun picks Kamaura up... Powerslam! Shogun sets Kamaura up... Double arm suplex! Shogun is still not done, he again picks Kamaura up... Kamaura counters with a jaw breaker!"
Brad Blood: "Ack! Lucky schmuck! Ugh! Kamaura locks a sleeper hold on the champ!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun tries to break free! Kamaura has both hands locked in tight. Shogun tries to reach for the ropes but it's too far away! Shogun is fading, the lack of oxygen is sending Shogun to sleep. The ref comes up and lifts Shogun's arm... Down it goes. One! He lifts Shogun's arm a second time... It again falls down to his side! Two! The ref lifts the champs arm one more time... WAIT! IT STAYS UP!!!"
Brad Blood: "Man, I got worried there... Shogun battles his way out of the sleeper. Woo! He's sending Kamaura back with heavy punches!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun manages to get behind Shogun... Rolling German suplexes connect! ONE! TWO! THREE GERMAN SUPLEXES! Kamaura is down! Shogun climbs up the top turnbuckles. Flying headbutt! Oh that has also gotta hurt Shogun as much as it hurts Kamaura! Shogun hooks the leg."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "Damn! Ten minutes left and the match is still tied at one each. Still a tie still means that Shogun retains!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun pounds the mat in frustration, he grabs Kamaura's leg and locks in a half-Boston crab! Kamaura tries to fight it out... He makes it to the ropes. The ref breaks the hold. Shogun quickly drags Kamaura back to the middle of the ring... This time he locks in a Texas clover leaf! Kamaura is trapped with nowhere to go. Wait! Kamaura somehow gets free and locks in an ankle lock! Now it's Shogun who's in pain!"
Brad Blood: "Shogun reaches out and gets a rope break before the reverse figure four could make any damage. That was a close one."
Jim Jackson: "Both men getting wary of each other, Kamaura looks at the clock and knows that time is running out. He lunges in... Shogun counters with a knee to the head. Shogun brings Kamaura down and locks in a STF! No! Kamaura is battling out of the STF! Shogun loses his grip! Kamaura with a wild right misses! Shogun with an uppercut stuns Kamaura! Shogun lifts Ray Kamaura up into into the air in a half Nelson and then into a backdrop position before slamming Ray Kamaura down to a sitting position, slamming the back of his neck to the canvas executing a Demonic Sacrifice!"
Brad Blood: "Now that shook the ring! Shogun for the cover..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun gets another win giving him the advantage with a 2-1 lead over Kamaura! The wrestlers are again reset. This is bad for Kamaura, he needs to get another pin to win... And the match resumes! Kamaura goes all out! He's throwing caution to the wind as he throws punch after punch at the champ! Shogun care barely defend as he is sent to the corner."
Brad Blood: "Shogun only needs to hold off, the time is already ticking..."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura stuns Shogun with a hook to the side of the jaw! Shogun's arms are down. Bulldog by Kamaura! Shogun gets up... Ray Kamaura kicks Shogun in the gut causing Shogun to double over, puts his right shoulder to the back of Shogun's Neck, grabs the back of their legs and quickly lifts them up. Ray holds the pose for a few seconds and then falls onto his butt, crushing Shogun's neck on his shoulder executing The End Game! This could be it! Kamaura could even the score with this! He goes for the cover..."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "Shogun gets a foot up on the bottom rope! Close call! Kamaura cannot believe it! He drags Shogun to the middle of the ring and again goes for the cover."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura is getting frustrated, he pounds his fists on the canvas! Shogun is still suffering from the effects of The End Game... Kamaura brings him up and hits a fireman carry! Shogun staggers back up... Right into a northern lights suplex pin attempt!"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."
Brad Blood: "Oh man another close call! Shogun is really hanging in there."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura lifts Shogun up and hits a couple of chops to Shogun's chest. An Irish whip sends Shogun to the ropes. Shogun ducks below a clothesline! Shogun bounces back... Kamaura charges in... DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE AND BOTH MEN ARE DOWN!"
Brad Blood: "Time is ticking and the referee begins the ten count."
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura somehow realizes the situation and climbs back up to his feet. His legs are still like jelly after that impact and he slumps back to the canvas. Shogun is still down!"
Jack B. Nimble: "Four! Five! Six!"
Brad Blood: "Shogun is stirring. Kamaura is again trying to stand up, this time using the ropes for leverage."
Jack B. Nimble: "Seven! Eight! Nine!"
Jim Jackson: "Both men get back up to their feet! Shogun charges in! Kamaura stops him with an elbow! Shogun staggers back... Kamaura leaps from the second rope and hits a flying clothesline! Shogun goes down but somehow staggers back up... Ray Kamaura kicks Shogun in the gut causing Shogun to double over, puts his right shoulder to the back of Shogun's Neck, grabs the back of their legs and quickly lifts them up. Ray holds the pose for a few seconds and then falls onto his butt, crushing Shogun's neck on his shoulder executing The End Game! Kamaura hooks the leg!"
Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"
Brad Blood: "Ack! I can't believe he got the pinfall! Now it's tied! Still, Shogun only needs to hold out, a tie will let Shogun keep the title."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura knows that time is running out. He quickly goes after Shogun with all he's got! Shogun begins answering back! It's a brawl folks! Both men are really throwing all they've got into this! Shogun trying to keep Kamaura from scoring another pinfall while Kamaura desperately trying to get another point to win the title. These final minutes could mean the world for these two wrestlers."
Brad Blood: "Wow, both men are just really just throwing punches, they aren't even blocking!"
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura is getting the advantage, he is pushing the champ back! Shogun gets stunned by a big right! Kamaura lifts him up on his shoulders. Shogun elbows his way free! Kamaura hits a faceplant on Shogun! Kamaura looking to end this, he climbs up to the top turnbuckle... Shogun gets up and sees Kamaura in a precarious position! Shogun leaps up to the turnbuckles and starts pounding on Kamaura! Kamaura fights back... He kicks the champ off the ropes! Shogun hits the canvas neck first! Oh this could be bad.... The crowd is cheering for Kamaura!"
Brad Blood: "Stupid crowd, they should show more support for the champ."
Jim Jackson: "Kamaura leaps this could be it! NOOO!!! Shogun gets his knees up and Kamaura crashes gut first into Shogun's knees! Shogun quickly gets up while Kamaura is down. Shogun stands over Ray Kamaura who is lying on the mat face up and grasps his leg, Shogun then does a spinning toe hold and grasps the other leg, crossing them into a four locking in the Demonic Reckoning! Kamaura is trying to reach for the ropes. He is just inches from the ropes... KAMAURA TAPS!"
Brad Blood: "WOO! Shogun gets another point! 3-2!!! Wait there's the bell! The match is over!"
Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and STILL ULOL Primo Ultimo champion... Shogun!"
Jim Jackson: "Shogun with a well fought victory over Kamaura! The fans may not like him but he definitely earns the title of Primo Ultimo Champion."
Brad Blood: "Yeah! Shogun rocks! He is cool!"
Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura may have lost this bout but he has cemented himself in the minds of the fans here tonight as a serious threat. What a match. What a match!"
Jim Jackson: "What a PPV! Tonight we saw Nao Fook Mi triumph against the odds stacked against her. We saw Bloodflame and Blackheart end their feud with such brutality and blood. We saw Morbidly Unstoppable win the Campeónes Compañero titles in one of the most disgusting matches in ULOL history. We saw Q go all out to win the Ligero Maximo title. And lastly we saw Shogun retain the Primo Ultimo title after a well fought grueling battle!"
Brad Blood: "I know, this PPV is sooooooooo good I creamed my pants."
Jim Jackson: "Ugh! Too much info Brad! Anyways what's in-store for ULOL next week? After a PPV like this what else can top this? Well tune in next week in Lucha Loco to see the aftermath! For Brad Blood, this is Jim Jackson signing off! What a night! What a night!"