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 Lucha Loco 12/02/2010

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The Morbidly Obese Man
The Morbidly Obese Man

Posts : 2990
Join date : 2008-12-29
Age : 43

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Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Empty
PostSubject: Lucha Loco 12/02/2010    Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  I_icon_minitimeThu Dec 02, 2010 6:53 am

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Luchal12

Jim Jackson: "Good evening and welcome folks to the FIRST televised episode of Lucha Loco here on UHF Channel 62! That's right, tonight we will be watched by millions of viewers from across the country! Joining me here in the announce table is my partner in crime Brad Blood."

Brad Blood: "Yes! Finally we get air time! Now everyone can watch the lunacy from the privacy of their homes! And what a card we have for everyone this evening. We have Bloodflame versus Lucian Blackheart, the disgusting Stank Lord is making an appearance, we also have Allister King who hopefully is sober enough to fight and for the main event... A four corners match for the ULOL Primo Ultimo title! That's right see Shogun defend his title against Alexander Conway, Q and The Morbidly Obese Man!"

Jim Jackson: "I'm sure we've teased the viewers enough with what's in-store for tonight so without further ado... LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Thesqu10

"Hunt You Down" by Saliva starts playing as Alexander Conway appears on the entrance ramp dressed to compete. He hastily grabs a microphone from a nearby employee.

Alexander Conway: "Cut my music!"

The music abruptly stops as per Alexander's request. As he continues walking towards the ring, he's angry voice reverberates throughout the arena.

Alexander Conway: "Last week should of been my crowning achievement! Not Shogun's! I had that battle royale won, damn it!"

Approaching the ring, Alexander quickly slides in before continuing.

Alexander Conway: "If it wasn't for the overweight freak show known as The Morbidly Obese Man, I would be the Primo Ultimo Champion right now! But no! That fat sack of crap snapped the top-rope and Shogun used that to his advantage to avoid tapping out to the Prophecy. Not only should that referee be fired for his poor call, but I should be given a one vs. one opportunity against Shogun!"

The crowd lets out a thunderous set of boos at Alexander's comments.

Alexander Conway: "You people know it's true! If that top-rope hadn't been out of place, you would be looking at a different champion, me! How can Shogun call himself a "Demonic God" and say that we should fear him, when he can only defeat greatness itself by using a misplaced top-rope?"

Alexander lets his question hang in the air for a moment while he looks over the booing audience.

Alexander Conway: "Instead of giving the runner-up, who should of been the victor, a fair title shot, Marcus Troy decided to put Shogun and myself in the ring against two other men! This sounds like it was made to intentionally prevent me from becoming the champion."

Alexander turns to face the backstage area before leaning against the ropes.

Alexander Conway: "Marcus, if you were half the business man that I thought you were, then you would make the right choice. Do what's right for ULOL Marcus, allow Alexander Conway a fair shot against Shogun."

The microphone drops from Alexander's hands as he exits the ring. Ignoring the audience, Alexander makes his way up the ramp before disappearing backstage.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind12

Scene opens inside a locker room, it has been metaphorically turned upside down as if someone has just raided it. A steel chair with a huge dent in it comes flying across the room crashing onto the wall and falling onto the floor below. The camera whizzes round and catches the sight of a very angry "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson:. Why is he so angry? The answer is simple. He suffered his first ever loss at the previous show.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "NO! I CAN'T... I WON'T BELIEVE IT! I CAN'T HAVE!"

UJJ spins around and falls to a prone position on the floor. He looks up at the locker, untouched and harmless. UJJ gets up slowly and then suddenly charges into it, Leaving a huge dent in it.

The door then swings open and a random worker enters, checking on the damage. He doesn't however, spot UJJ stalking him from behind. The worker turns around and UJJ leaps up applying a three quarter facelock on the worker and slamming him down onto the floor with a brutal JKO! The worker has been knocked out cold.


UJJ walks out of his room and looks at the T.V firmly attached to the wall. The main event is about to start. UJJ smiles a venomous and evil smile as he walks towards the stage as the scene fades on the unconscious worker.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Thesqu10

The Lights are out. The fans are quiet. After a few seconds the silence breaks with the sound of "Blind Man" by Black Stone Cherry. As the arena again fills with light, the fans see Ray Kamaura standing in the ring with a mic.

Ray Kamaura: "You know... I'm here tonight for a reason."

Ray turns around and looks at the fans on the other side before continuing.

Ray Kamaura: "Alex...ander... Conway."

Ray moves to the turn buckle and climbs it. Turns around and sits down.

Ray Kamaura: "I'm tired of him running his mouth. Alexander is just overconfident prima donna. Tonight... after the 4 corners match.... I'm gonna pay him a visit and ask him ever so nicely for a match. I know that you are all sick of that big mouth, so now I'm going to do something that should have been done a long time ago......"

Ray chuckles before finishing his sentence.

Ray Kamaura: "It's gonna be game over... for... Alexander... Conway..."

Ray Kamaura: "That man is all talk. I'm not gonna lie to you tonight, he has some skill... but he doesn't compare to myself. He acts like he knows it all... and that this company belongs to him. But it doesn't."

Ray hops off the turnbuckle and rolls outside the ring. Slowly he starts to walk up the ramp.

Ray: "Soon, I'll teach him a little humility, for you fans, with the "End Game"."

Ray: "But first things first... My match with Hillbilly Phil is next. All I can tell him is....good luck."

Ray hands his mic to the referee before disappearing backstage.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Hillbi10VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Raykam10

Jim Jackson: "And kicking off the show, we have Hillbilly Phil going against newcomer Ray Kamaura!"

Brad Blood: "Hmm... Never heard of this Ray Kamaura..."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Hillbilly Phil!"

A loud Yee-Haw blares over the speakers as bluegrass music plays over the sound system, Hillbilly Phil makes his way to the ring carrying with him a jug which he shares with the crowd.

Jim Jackson: "And here comes the crowd favorite Hillbilly Phil!"

Brad Blood: "He's still just a dumb country hick."

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for the evening, Ray Kamaura!"

"Blind Man" by Black Stone Cherry blares throughout the arena as Ray Kamaura makes his way to the ring very slowly.

Jim Jackson: "And here enters Ray Kamaura, the fact sheet here says that Kamaura grew up in the streets."

Brad Blood: "Holy crap, he's HUGE! And he has BLUE HAIR!!!"

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Kamaura charges in with a back elbow... Back elbow connects, Phil staggers backward. Slam on Phil. Kamaura for the early cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Phil gets a shoulder up, Kamaura still has to soften up that dumb redneck more if he wants to get a three."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura grabs Phil by the wrists and twists his hands behind him... Phil with hard elbow to Ray Kamaura's face breaks the hammerlock! Snap suplex sends Kamaura to the canvas! Phil is not yet done, he grabs Kamaura and sends him to the ropes with an Irish whip... Back body drop sends Kamaura flying! Phil hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kamaura kicks out! Phil lands a few hard shots while Kamaura is still down... But it looks like Kamaura is just soaking the damage."

Jim Jackson: "Phil stuns Kamaura with a heavy shot to the jaw! He lifts Kamaura up... JUMPING POWERBOMB!!!"

Brad Blood: "PHIL JUST FOLDED KAMAURA IN HALF!!! THAT WAS BRUTAL! Phil for the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura gets a shoulder up at the last possible millisecond... Butterfly suplex from Phil sends Kamaura to the mat! Phil tries to show us his technical abilities and locks in a sleeper."

Brad Blood: "Ray Kamaura struggles but he's really caught there. Kamaura is fading... The referee lifts Kamaura's arm... It goes down..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One!"

Jim Jackson: "The ref lifts Kamaura's arm one more time and it still goes down!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Two!"

Brad Blood: "Dang looks like that damned hick has neutralized Kamaura... The ref lifts Kamaura's hand one last time... AND IT STAYS UP!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura is still in the game! He fights the sleeper hold... And he pushes free sending Phil to the ropes. Bulldog of the ropes plants Phil to the canvas! Kamaura hooks the leg..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Tsk. Phil still kicks out."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura lifts Phil upside-down... JUMPING PILE DRIVER!!!."

Brad Blood: "Are necks suppose to bend that way?! Kamaura for the cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Jim Jackson: "Phil gets a leg on the bottom rope! Kamaura continues his assault... Running knee lift connects! Phil is seeing stars... Kamaura smacks Phil around before sending him to the ropes with an Irish whip. Oh! Phil saw that backdrop coming and counters with a kick to Kamaura's face!"

Brad Blood: "Ooh! I think he may have broken Kamaura's nose with that one! I see BLOOD!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Hillbilly Phil sends Ray Kamaura to the mat with a beautiful butterfly suplex! Phil holds Kamaura up for a few seconds... Delayed brainbuster suplex! Kamaura is not moving but Phil is still not done!"

Brad Blood: "Dang! Don't tell me this is the end for Kamaura... Is this all the newcomer has?"

Jim Jackson: "Back suplex from Phil! And he hooks the leg!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Looks like Kamaura barely made it out of that one!"

Jim Jackson: "A thrust kick to the torso sends Kamaura flying! Phil with a legsweep sends Kamaura to the mat! Phil climbs to the second turnbuckle... Here comes an elbow..."

Brad Blood: "Haha! Phil hits nothing but canvas as Kamaura rolls away at the last second!"

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura quickly gets up and hits a spinning neckbreaker on Phil! Sidewalk slam by Kamaura and he quickly hooks the leg!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Phil still kicks out! I say both men are pretty tough..."

Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura tries to lift Phil... Phil blocks a suplex attempt using the power of gravity. REVERSAL! Hillbilly Phil hits a delayed suplex on Kamaura."

Brad Blood: "Phil really made the blood rush into Kamaura's head on that one! Phil for the cover..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura gets a shoulder up! Phil lifts Kamaura up... RUNNING POWERBOMB!!! RIGHT INTO THE TURNBUCKLES TOO!"

Brad Blood: "Ooh! That made me cringe! That was BRUTAL!!! Phil hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura somehow still kicks out! Phil is in disbelief! Phil with an Irish whip sends Kamaura to the ropes... Kamaura dodges the clothesline and bounces back... He takes Phil down with a shoulder tackle! Kamaura sends Phil to the mat with a body slam."

Brad Blood: "That slam is lacking impact, looks like Kamaura is getting a little winded."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura tries to lift Phil from behind but Hillbilly Phil connects with a mule kick from out of nowhere! Phil lifts Kamaura and drops him throat first into the top rope!"

Brad Blood: "Ooh! That left a mark... Kamaura is clutching his throat in pain."

Jim Jackson: "Hillbilly Phil Irish whips Kamaura to the ropes... REVERSAL! Kamaura reverses the Irish whips and it's Phil who gets sent to the ropes. Discus clothesline sends Phil down!"

Brad Blood: "Whoa! That clothesline almost decapitated Phil."

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura starts landing some punches just as Phil gets up. Phil ducks a wild right and counters with a stiff lariat clothesline! Phil sends Kamaura to the ropes... He misses the clothesline! Kamaura bounces back and takes him down with a spear!"

Brad Blood: "I think I felt the impact of that spear from here...Phil barely gets up from that one... He's holding unto the ropes for support... He turns around..."

Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura kicks Hillbilly Phil in the gut causing Hillbilly Phil to double over, puts his right shoulder to the back of Hillbilly Phil's Neck, grabs the back of their legs and quickly lifts them up. Ray holds the pose for a few seconds and then falls onto his butt, crushing Hillbilly Phil's neck on his shoulder executing The End Game! Kamaura hits his finisher! Kamaura hooks the leg..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match by pinfall... Ray Kamaura!"

Brad Blood: "Hah! And the redneck goes down! He should return to whatever backwater county he came from and wrestle pigs instead."

Jim Jackson: "A strong debut by Ray Kamaura. Both men gave it their all tonight but it's the newcomer that is left standing in the end. What a great way to start the evening. Ray Kamaura climbs each turnbuckle in turn, working the crowd as he celebrates his victory. I see a bright new star in ULOL is born tonight."

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10
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The Morbidly Obese Man
The Morbidly Obese Man

Posts : 2990
Join date : 2008-12-29
Age : 43

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PostSubject: Re: Lucha Loco 12/02/2010    Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  I_icon_minitimeThu Dec 02, 2010 6:54 am

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Beyond10

The scene opens with the apartment where "Dashing" Taufik lives and the site isn't as dashing as it used to be with the place being empty. There are a lot of messages in his answering machine which is blinking, suddenly the phone rings. After a few more rings the answering machine picks up.

Taufik's voice recording: "Hey there, you are calling the "Dashing" resident. I'm not currently home I'm either wrestling, or I'm treating myself to a spa. So leave a message after the beep,and I will get back to you."


Facial product operator: "Hello Mr. Taufik, I'm from Nivea for men, we want to confirm your order for the week but couldn't get in touch to you for four days now. Please call back as soon as possible, thank you."

As we can see "Dashing" Taufik is nowhere to be found. We see on the side of the apartment as the camera pans sideways. There are a big pile of facial products, and they are all in the trash. There is another call but again the machine picks it up.

Man: "Son, Where are you? Are you in trouble? Your friend Arnas has been calling me and asking for your whereabouts. Please call me when you get the message."

The scene slowly fades to be black as Taufik's dad puts down the phone, ending the call.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind10

Scene opens inside the backstage area, in a huge hallway. There are tables stacked with merchandise and snack stands. The camera then focuses on a young woman, blond hair and quite averagely sized. It is Lady Bianca de Sade. She is looking at a black hooded jumper with a Hawk on the back and the words The British Hawk, printed in White and bold letters. The standholder notices her looking deeply at the jacket and approaches her.

Standholder: "A TBH fan eh? You're just about the only one left. I haven't sold any TBH merchandise since he first came here. Sad isn't it. A star in the wrestling world turns worthless after a girl breaks his heart,"

The standholder obviously doesn't recognize who Lady Bianca de Sade is, she looks at the standholder and tries her best to put on a smile.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "Yeah, what a shame,"

She folds up the jumper and places it back on the table, she looks to the ground. The Standholder, obviously looks sexually interested in Lady B so he goes to say a pick up line, however Lady B quickly walks off in a hurry. The Standholder sighs as The British Hawk comes into view, he looks down the hallway as he sees Lady B disappear into the crowd, he turns the other way and walks out of view again. The Standholder looks disappointed as he notices a customer.

Standholder: "Yes mate, what can I get you."

The young man points at a shirt, the Stallholder passes him an UJJ t-shirt as the scene fades.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Vehicu10

Walking out to the parking lot, ULOL's resident kung-fu girl from China, Nao Fook Mi spots Brostar. Once one of the wrestlers that you'd be proud to call your friend, now reduced to serve a horrible man who really needs to bathe called Stank Lord. Seeing that Brostar is alone at the moment and not with his disgusting master, Fook Mi walks over.

Nao Fook Mi: "Y'know, last week, I didn't expect you to run in there and help Stank Lord win. What happened to the Brostar of old? Where are your values? Now you play Renfield to Stank Lord. Such a sorry state you've fallen Brostar, such a disappointment."

Brostar looks up at the oriental beauty standing before him. Fook Mi notices the sunken hollow eyes, the messed up hair and a faint odor emanating from Brostar.

Nao Fook Mi: "I once watched you fight until you couldn't fight anymore. Where's that never give up attitude? You let Stank Lord lug you around like a pony. The Brostar of old would have defied the wishes of such a disgusting individual despite the repercussions. You think your life is any better living like this? You should fight for your freedom but what do I see instead? I see you who helped a lowlife win his match last week."

Fook Mi walks closer until her face is right in front of Brostar's. She looked into his eyes intently...

Nao Fook Mi: "Wake up Brostar, wake up from this stupor and fight. Do not lose yourself in self-pity and doubt, do not go willingly on the machinations of disgusting lowlife such as Stank Lord. I know you are still in there Brostar... If need be, know that you have a friend who is willing to help you."

Fook Mi offers her hand to Brostar.

Brostar: "I'm accepting no hand shake, I'm my own man now, I was not allowed to be the person that I'm really am so I decided to make a change now for Stank Lord. He is the one that helped me to where I am today even through sometimes people like you think we hate each other guts well you and the fans no nothing about whats going on between us and as for you. You better stay out of our business or your going to find yourself in deep trouble."

As that has been said Brostar let of a reeking hot rotten egg fart that reached Neo Fook's nose within seconds.

Not letting the stench get to her Fook Mi retorts back...

Nao Fook Mi: "It seems that I was wrong about you. Your personality has become as rotten as the gas you pass."

Fook Mi shakes her head in disappointment and leaves the parking lot.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Andrew10VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Stankl10

Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Already in the ring, Andrew Hunter!"

"New Divide" by Linkin Park blasts through the arena. Andrew Hunter appears on the top of the ramp, straightening out his elbow pads. He smiles as he begins walking down the ramp. Andrew slaps the hands of the fans on his left, followed by the fans on his right. He slides underneath the ropes and quickly bounces back up, jumping up on a turnbuckle.

Jasmine Lee: "His opponent, accompanied by Brostar, here is Stank Lord!"

"This stinks" plays as Stank Lord appears on stage, accompanied by his lackey, Brostar. Stank Lord looks around him then walks down the ramp and into the ring, followed by Brostar.

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord looking to build on his win last week. Andrew Hunter is no pushover, though."

Brad Blood: "Hunter's hungry like the rest of 'em, all right. He told me earlier today he's been scouting Stank Lord, and he's got a gameplan for tonight."

Jim Jackson: "There's the bell. Hunter and Stank Lord locking up, no Hunter scoots behind his opponent, and lashes out with a strike to the kidneys. He's quickly hammering at the Stank Lord, and darts away to avoid his opponent's blows."

Brad Blood: "Stank Lord didn't like that at all. He's going after him!"

Jim Jackson: "Andrew Hunter quick to sidestep! Dropkick to Stank Lord's leg takes him down! Andrew Hunter with a kick to the other leg! He's trying to mount Stank Lord from behind while he's down!"

Brad Blood: "Hunter trying to neutralize Stank Lord's size advantage! He's trying to lock some sort of submission hold on him, but the Stank Lord tries to get to the ropes!"

Jim Jackson: "The Stank Lord reaches the ropes, just as Andrew Hunter almost manages to lock the sleeperhold on him! Hunter lets go, but he quickly kicks the Stank Lord in the back!"

Brad Blood: "And now he's pulling him away from the ropes...manages to take Stank Lord down with a leg trip! Hunter's scouting seems to be paying off at the moment."

Jim Jackson: "Andrew Hunter goes for Stank Lord's legs with some hard kicks! He's trying to grab them, but the Stank Lord manages to poke him in the eye!"

Brad Blood: "But Andrew Hunter quickly lashes out, clipping Stank Lord with another kick! Quick reaction by Hunter to buy himself some time to recover from the eyepoke. Stank Lord seems to be less mobile right now, as he tries to shake off the pain in his legs."

Jim Jackson: "Andrew Hunter...running clothesline, but Stank Lord drops him with a clothesline of his own! The Stank Lord misses the elbowdrop! And Andrew Hunter with a jumping stomp to halt the Stank Lord's momentum!"

Brad Blood: "The little man taking the fight to his much larger opponent. He's doing more than just holding his own!"

Jim Jackson: "Hunter quickly wrapping his arms around the Stank Lord's neck, trying to put him to sleep! The Stank Lord trying to battle back to his feet! Hunter trying to hold his leverage over the Stank Lord!"

Brad Blood: "Stank Lord gets to his feet and throws his full weight backwards, landing right on top of Andrew Hunter!"

Jim Jackson: "Hunter with the wind knocked out of him! But Stank Lord unable to go for the pinfall attempt! Both men...trying to get to their feet."

Brad Blood: "Hunter misses the dropkick! Stank Lord grabs him, but Hunter slips loose! Big roundhouse kick!"

Jim Jackson: "Incredible! The force of the hit sends Stank Lord through the ropes, and out of the ring!"

Brad Blood: "Andrew Hunter's got Stank Lord reeling! He's going out after him! He sends Stank Lord crashing into the ringsteps! Hunter following up, but Brostar is blocking his way!"

Jim Jackson: "The referee warning Brostar to back off. Brostar protesting, but the referee urging him to step back!"

Brad Blood: "He'll get himself sent back to the locker room if he Andrew Hunter attacks Brostar!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar caught off-guard by Hunter! Hunter rocking Brostar with solid strikes! Kicks Brostar in the gut...and he just used Brostar for Target Practice!"

Brad Blood: "Brostar goes flat on the floor from that hit!"

Jim Jackson: "The official admonishing Andrew Hunter, but Brostar took that risk when he tried to help the Stank Lord. Hunter getting in the ring and GORE! GORE! GORE!"

Brad Blood: "Andrew Hunter's sent crashing into the corner!"


Brad Blood: "Hunter's unfortunately now in the perfect position for Stank Lord!"


Brad Blood: "Stank Lord's just licking his lips and touching himself inappropriately! AAAAAAGH and he farted on Hunter for good measure!"

Jim Jackson: "Hunter is foaming at the mouth! The Stank Lord with the cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match, by pinfall, Stank Lord!"

Brad Blood: "We're gonna need medical help for Andrew Hunter!"

Jim Jackson: "Wait! The Stank Lord is pushing the referee away! He's...he plants a wet and juicy FART on Andrew Hunter's kisser again!"

Brad Blood: "And we got Brostar limping his way into the ring! If it wasn't for him, Stank Lord probably would have lost this match!"

Jim Jackson: "Andrew Hunter as helpless as a newborn kitten! Stank Lord...he's giving way to Brostar!"

Brad Blood: "Oh no way!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar is grimacing with all his might! He...farts on Andrew Hunter!"

Brad Blood: "ANDREW HUNTER TWITCHING VIOLENTLY! I think he may have hurt himself convulsing over this abuse, Jim!"

Jim Jackson: "The Stank Lord SITS on Andrew Hunter! He's ordering Brostar to let rip another one!"

Brad Blood: "I don't think he can take much more of this!"

Jim Jackson: "What's this! Nao Fook Mi!"

Brad Blood: "We can't do that on the air!"

Jim Jackson: "No! NAO FOOK MI! She's running to the ring to help Hunter!"

Brad Blood: "She's got a baseball bat! And a gas mask!"

Jim Jackson: "Brostar and Stank Lord are outta there! Nao Fook Mi may have just saved Andrew Hunter from permanent damage!"

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind10

The Camera fades from black to show a couple of women sitting around talking about shoes and dresses and such, when an oh too familiar voice is heard.

??: "As I went home on Monday night, Drunk as Drunk could be, I show a horse outside the door where my old horse use to be!"

The Camera zooms out at the perfect timing as to avoid see Allister King, who is for some unknown reason walking around naked, wave his ding-a-ling in the face of the camera.

Allister King: "Ah I see a large number of beautiful women in my line of sight!"

The Women Looked confused

Woman 1: "There are only three of us."

Allister King: "Oh I get it, the other six girls aren't apart of ya group."

Woman 2: "No there is only us 3 here and why are you naked?"

Allister walks up to the women, when I say walk I mean stagger.

Allister King: "You calling me a liar? And besides it's my birthday, I have to wear my birthday suit."

The women remains silent as Allister swings his junk in the face of the women.

Allister King: "Just as I thought! You thought I was a liar!"

Allister looks at all 3 women who all looked shocked except the third one who has a smile on her face.

Woman 3: "Hey do you maybe want to go for some drinks sometime?"

Allister looks ecstatic at hearing the word drink.

Allister King: "Why wait lets go now?"

Woman 3: "OK!"

The women gets her stuff and walks away with Allister.

Woman 3: "I think maybe you should put on some clothes first?"

Allister and the women turn the corner and are out of range of the camera.

Woman 1: "I always knew she was a weirdo."

Woman 2: "But to go out with that drunk, that's bad..."

Woman 1: "But to be fair he did have a really big....."

Allister runs down the hall and urinates on the 2 remaining women.

Allister King: "You are now my property!! Mwahahahahaha!"

Allister runs away again and the 2 remaining women cry as the camera fades to black.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10
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The Morbidly Obese Man
The Morbidly Obese Man

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Age : 43

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PostSubject: Re: Lucha Loco 12/02/2010    Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  I_icon_minitimeThu Dec 02, 2010 6:54 am

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind12

GoodFella is sitting in The Entourage locker room reminiscing about the days when he was a tag team champion with his fellows Taufik and Jim Rival. Having a glass of grape juice in his hand, he is slightly miffed that Mr. Ferrer is not allowing them to drink alcohol beverages such as martini, vodka or whiskey.

After some time, he notices that his partner still hasn't shown up. He wonders why Taufik is not here right now since he was usually the first to arrive but he hasn't heard anything from Taufik since last week. He picks up mobile telephone from table and starts dialing and waits for someone to answer.

Taufik's voice recording: "Hey there, you are calling the "Dashing" resident. I'm not currently home I'm either wrestling, or I'm treating myself to a spa. So leave a message after the beep, and I will get back to you."

There is no sound for a several seconds and then...


Arnold ”GoodFella” Bold : "Hey dude, where the heck are you? You always early, but today you are not here... Are you okay? Or maybe you in trouble anyway let us know about you dude."

He turns off the phone and puts it on the table then picks up glass of juice and slowly drinks it. Then suddenly he remembers a place where Taufik maybe hanging.

GoodFella: "Hmm... Well since I've got nothing better to do, might as well look for him."

GoodFella exits the locker room forgetting to lock it.

Meanwhile Felix Schwarz was around the area when he sees Arnold "GoodFella" Bold exit The Entourage locker room in haste leaving the door open. He silently smiles to himself as the perfect opportunity to plant a bug presented itself.

He enters locker room and looks around, searching for the best place to plant the bug. He looks up and sees the vent. He silently celebrates as it is the perfect place to plant the bug. Soon he will be able to listen in the Bold and maybe get so details on Bold and his Mafia connections. He puts a chair near the vent and climbs up on the chair, taking out his Swiss army knife, he unscrews the screws holding the vent in place and plants the bug. Just as he finishes and screws in the last screw, the chair leg creaks and gives sending Felix Schwarz tumbling down.

GoodFella was in the corridors with Stephanie Dawson asking about Taufik when hears a crash emanating from The Entourage Locker Room. Thinking that it could be Taufik he runs back quickly and sees a man on a ground. He didn’t recognize him at first butas the man stands up turns around GoodFella recognizes the wrestler, Felix Schwarz, the man he beat last week.

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "What the hell are you doing in our locker room? Did you get lost or something? Maybe you are planning some sort of revenge towards me since I beat you last week? If that's the case, you best fuhgeddaboudit unless you want another beating. I'll take you on anytime just go to the GM ask for the match."

GoodFella stares menacingly at Schwarz.

Felix doesn’t look very happy but he replies to the man known as GoodFella.

Felix Schwarz: "No I am not lost and I know that this locker room belongs to The Entourage, I just was going to the cafeteria and saw doors open. I got curious, entered, slipped on something and fell to the ground. Just so you know, you may have won our first meeting in the ring but the next time we meet, things won't end the same way."

Smile appears on face of Felix as he knows he has fooled Bold. Before he exits he says.

Felix Schwarz: "Last week, you were making fun of my surname saying it's half of Schwarzenegger, but you know what? I am proud of my surname, it definitely has more substance than Bold. We shall go ahead again one day, and things will be different. I bid you farewell for now Mr. Bold..."

Schwarz exits and closes the door and leaving GoodFella alone with a bottle of juice and his thoughts as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

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Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind12

Felix Schwarz is now his locker room sitting alone after putting a bug into The Entourage's locker room. He picks up the phone from his pocket and starts dialing a number.

Voice: "I was expecting your call. Any new leads?"

Felix thinks for a minute on what to say and then replies.

[color=brown]Felix Schwarz: "Sir I just put bug in Bold's locker room. I had a little bad luck and ended up in a little confrontation with the target. Nothing that blew my cover."

Felix pauses and thinks for a while before continuing.

Felix Schwarz: "I just thought on an idea sir. What do you think of me infiltrating into the target's group called The Entourage? The group consists of a wrestler named “Dashing” Taufik and their manager Mr. Manolo Ferrer. I would need more information about them though. Hopefully our intel can come up with something next week."

Voice: "That seems like a solid plan. It could really work, I will see what I can do from here to act as support. This may be the break we need to bring the Bold family down for good.

Felix Schwarz: "Okay. I will inform you then I get more information. Felix out."

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Bloodf10VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Lucian10

Jim Jackson: "The upcoming match has an interesting backstory to it. It seems that in the past Bloodflame and Lucian Blackheart were allies, in fact they were in the same stable called The Legion."

Brad Blood: "Oh! I remember that, Bloodflame then unceremoniously kicked Blackheart out of the stable... I guess Lucian Blackheart still harbors a grudge."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Bloodflame!"

"Asylum" by Disturbed starts to play as the entrance way explodes with fire. Bloodflame walks through the fire and makes his way to the ring. He enters and grabs a mic, glancing out at the crowd before he turns to look towards the entryway.

Bloodflame: "Come on out here, you little shit, let's get this over with. I've got more important things to do than deal with you."

Bloodflame tosses the mic out of the ring, pacing back and forth, watching the entryway intently.

Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame look as menacing as ever... I remember you once had a picture of him in your wallet Brad..."

Brad Blood: "Oh that, it fell down the toilet when I was mast... I mean when I was checking if I had cash left in my wallet..."

Jim Jackson: "..."

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for the evening, Lucian Blackheart!"

"Faith Love Hope by Starsailor" blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with smoke. Red spotlights scatter around the arena and follow a Lucian Blackheart. He raises his arms and slowly spins. He raises the mic to his mouth as he ponders the stage."

Lucian Blackheart: "Seriously Bloodflame? How much trouble did you have to go through to set up this match? a heavyweight vs a lightweight match just to prove how pathetic you are? Wow.. and to think once upon a time I idolized you. Guess you really are washed up, old man."

Lucian slowly starts to make his way down the ramp.

Lucian Blackheart: "You were once possibly the smartest man in the business, but today you've definitely made the stupidest decision by actually showing up for this match. Not only have you shown the fans of ULOL how pathetic you are, but now they get to watch me beat your ass too."

Without hesitation Lucian sprints towards the ring sliding in and quickly rising to is feet, trying to keep his distance from Bloodflame.

Lucian Blackheart: "The only thing you've managed to accomplish is destroy the reputation that took you so long to build, and you've blindly helped further mine. People will speak of how I stood toe to toe with the best in the business.. But what will they say about you?"

Lucian slowly walks up to Bloodflame getting up in his face. He slowly raises the mic to his mouth.

Lucian Blackheart: "Absolutely nothing. Not out of fear, but because soon they will see what I see."

Lucian slowly walks back with a sick sadistic smile on his face.

Lucian Blackheart: "ME!"

Jim Jackson: "Strong words from Lucian Blackheart... This will truly be an interesting match, both men are still undefeated in singles matches since their entrance to ULOL."

Brad Blood: "Well my bet is on Bloodflame... Lucian already is at a disadvantage due to their size difference."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Both men charge at each other with ferocity! We see fists flying early on from both wrestlers. Lucian ducks below Bloodflame's left cross and hits a jawbreaker! A weak body slam by Lucian."

Brad Blood: "Well he didn't get much height on that slam, Bloodflame easily outweighs him by more than fifty pounds."

Jim Jackson: "Springboard flying elbow by Lucian Blackheart finds Bloodflame's heart! Blackheart hooks the leg!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One..."

Brad Blood: "Bloodflame easily kicks out and quickly gets back to his feet. Looks like Blackheart hardly did any damage."

Jim Jackson: "Hard right staggers Blackheart! Snap suplex sends Lucian Blackheart to the canvas. Blackheart quickly gets up... Bloodflame takes the advantage with a punch to the face and again staggers around. Blackheart walks into a spinning heel kick. Bloodflame for the cover."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Blackheart gets a shoulder up! Bloodflame quickly lifts Blackheart up on his shoulders..."

Jim Jackson: "Lucian Blackheart fires a series of elbows to Bloodflame's head! Bloodflame loosens his grip and Lucian sends him to the ropes with an Irish whip! Bloodflame comes running back... Blackheart leaps over Bloodflame! Bloodflame bounces again on the ropes, this time Blackheart falls to the canvas and Bloodflame runs over him.... Lucian Blackheart leaps up into the air and connects with a dropkick just as Bloodflame bounces back again!"

Brad Blood: "Lucian quickly goes down and hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Bloodflame kicks out at two! Bloodflame fights his way back up... He puts his hands around Lucian Blackheart's neck and starts strangling him! Blackheart tries to pry loose but can't..."

Brad Blood: "HAHA! Blackheart copies Bloodflame instead! He also puts his arms around Bloodflame trying to strangle his rival! I guess if you can't beat them join them..."

Jim Jackson: "Both men are strangling each other, neither men backing down... The referee tries to break them apart..."

Brad Blood: "HAHA! They unintentionally knock the ref down! amazing, they are still strangling each other!"

Jim Jackson: "The ref again tries to pry both men apart... Again he gets knocked down..."

Brad Blood: "WAHAHA!!! This time both men trample all over the ref... AND THEY JUST TRAMPLED OVER THE REF'S NUTS!!!"

Jim Jackson: "The referee clutches his groin and howls in pain while Bloodflame and Blackheart continues their strangling of one another and... OH MY GOD!!!"

Brad Blood: "WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! They did it again! They trampled all over the referee's nuts again! WAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Tears are coming out of the referee's eyes as he clutches to his family jewels... OH GOOD GOD!!!"

Brad Blood: "WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! You know what they say... The third time's a charm! WAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! I think that referee won't be having kids anymore... WAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!"

Jim Jackson: "The referee has had enough! He's calling for the bell!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, as a result of a double disqualification, the following match has been declared a draw!"

Brad Blood: "Oh man, I guess no one wins this round huh? Wait! Bloodflame and Lucian Blackheart has started brawling again!"

Jim Jackson: "The fight has started up again! Bloodflame attacks Blackheart, and they brawl all around ringside, then into the crowd! They eventually disappear backstage, still fighting! I guess we'll be seeing a sequel of these two men in the near future."

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind10

Tearing through the backstage, the rampaging wrestler "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson smashes his way through the fleeing production staff. It was when a huge shadow loomed that he is suddenly stopped. Turning around he sees his not so loved partner, the huge mass of a man also known as The Morbidly Obese Man standing behind him. The big wrestler shook his head in disappointment.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Johnson Johnson Johnson... Tsk tsk tsk... You my friend are acting like a spoiled child, more so than that Chilean jack-ass Gonzalez. If you want somebody to blame in your elimination, you can point your finger to me. So you lost, so what? Seriously this tantrum of yours is getting you nowhere."

The Morbidly Obese Man stares directly into Johnson's fuming eyes.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "You need to calm down, why don't you do your name sake and Jack your Johnson somewhere? No? Ah well it was only a suggestion... Now knowing you and your tantrums, you're probably thinking of coming in later and busting everyone up eh?"

A smirk appears on the face of The Morbidly Obese Man as he knows he read his partner right.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Tell you what, if you really do plan to go in and interfere why not help me win instead? Since we are already tag partners and all, help me win tonight and I will grant you unlimited title shots at the title. Yes you heard me partner, help me win the belt off of Shogun and anytime, anywhere you want you can challenge me for the title. Now doesn't that sound like a sweet deal?"

the Morbidly Obese Man waits for Johnson to reply.

UJJ stares into the eyes of the large wrestler. He speaks with aggression and rage.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Listen Lard Ass, you obviously forgot that I have never lost a match in my entire career, until last week in that battle royale. You have no idea how I feel right now. Because you have a bus load of losses on your record."

UJJ doesn't move at all he just stands there, like a cold and rough statue.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Now as for the four corners match later, I should be in that match, simple. But yeah. I'll help you win tonight. But mark my words, I won't need an unlimited amount of title opportunities. All it will take is one JKO and I'm the new Champion."

UJJ finally moves a little, he looks at TMOM one last time before turning around and walking out of view, TMOM smirks as he will enjoy the last few minutes of the show. The scene fades out.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10
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The Morbidly Obese Man
The Morbidly Obese Man

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Age : 43

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Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Empty
PostSubject: Re: Lucha Loco 12/02/2010    Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  I_icon_minitimeThu Dec 02, 2010 6:55 am

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Behind12

Manolo Ferrer is seen walking down the hall, taking a phone call. He ignores the camera trained on him, walking briskly towards the Entourage's dressing room.

Manolo Ferrer: "Mr. Bold, the police have no details on where your tag team partner is. Mr. Taufik is doing a good job keeping himself out of sight, considering how well known his face is. We have the Entourage scheduled to face Jack Johnson and the Morbidly Obese Man. There is not much of an Entourage if it's only going to be you."

Mr. Ferrer turns the corner. The cameraman tries his best to keep up.

Manolo Ferrer: "I can understand Mr. Taufik being disappointed with himself for not winning the championship when he had the chance. I also find it very troubling that I now have to inform Marcus Troy that Mr. Taufik appears to be unavailable for his scheduled match. Given who you're scheduled to fight in this tag match, you can understand I would rather not see you be made to pay for your tag team partner's absence."

Mr. Ferrer's tone is even, with no hint of emotion.

Manolo Ferrer: "I don't hold Mr. Taufik's behavior against you at all. You are both grown men. However, Mr. Taufik leaving you on your own to deal with the Morbidly Obese Man and Jack Johnson does not reflect well on him. The police can't find him, and the dirt sheets and TMZ are spinning all sorts of stories about it."

Mr. Ferrer turns another corner, and hangs up when he sees GoodFella, who has been on the phone talking to him the whole time.

Manolo Ferrer: "Mr. Taufik isn't the first celebrity to do this sort of thing. But other celebrities who suddenly disappeared did not have to deal with rumors like getting a sex change, or running off to join the circus. Mr. Bold, our options right now are to ask Marcus Troy to allow someone else to take Mr. Taufik's place, make it a one-on-one with you versus either Johnson or the Morbidly Obese Man, or scrap the match. Knowing Mr. Troy, he will probably give us the least attractive option."

Arnold Bold looks worried when Manolo Ferrer informs him of the latest news about missing his tag team partner.

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "No! There’s no way that he could runaway like this. He can’t just do this to me. You know, I’ve been betrayed by my old tag partner Jim Rival. He just turned his back on me and left me in an important match. I cannot accept that Taufik will do the same to me. We've been together for a long time now, that is just not his style."

GoodFella drinks a gulp from a glass of juice.

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "I also have something bothering me. It’s not really a secret but you know that I once belonged to the Luciano family which is now one of the most feared mafia family in this city. But me and my brother separated from the Luciano family and started our own family. We have a lot of enemies around the country including the Luciano family which didn't look too kindly to our departure. Maybe one of the our rivals took him as hostage that’s why cops are not able to find him. Most of the cops in the city is under mafia payroll... It will be hard to tap into the police for information."

GoodFella looks a little paranoid...

Arnold "GoodFella" Bold: "We have until next week to find Taufik... On our match next week where we face The Morbidly Obese Man and” Unstoppable” Jack Johnson... I was a little afraid earlier but after some deep thinking, I think that beating these two by myself would bring my career to new heights. Until last week those two hated each other's guts, they still do... I doubt that they could be an effective tag team. They are more enemies than friends. What do you think Manolo?"

GoodFella looks to his manager for a reply.

Manolo Ferrer can only shake his head.

Manolo Ferrer: "I'd rather that not happen, Mr. Bold. But that decision could be taken out of our hands, if the General Manager decides to do just that. I'm going to have to talk to him about this."

Mr. Ferrer walks by GoodFella, and heads down to Marcus Troy's office.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Allist10VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Felixs10

Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Felix Schwarz!"

A man with long hair comes out. He strikes a pose for a moment, before heading to the ring. We notice a scar on his neck.

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz debuted last week with a loss to GoodFella. Tonight, he tries to notch his first win in the United League of Lunatics."

Brad Blood: "The guy's deeply focused on GoodFella, which explains why he's here in the first place. But Arnold Bold took him down. I heard that he asked for a rematch, but the General Manager didn't go for it."

Jasmine Lee: "His opponent, Allister King!"

A Coyote Howl is heard throughout the arena as the entrance is covered in smoke. Godsmack's Whiskey Hangover begins to play as Allister king walks out onto the entrance ramp, with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. He is also dressed up in a furry cartoon bear suit

Brad Blood: "What the hell?"

Jim Jackson: "He's dressed up like a mascot."

Brad Blood: "That's...a pretty dirty suit. Wait, are we sure that's really Allister King in that thing?"

The mascot tries to take a swig of his whiskey, but only succeeds in spilling more liquor all over himself, as he cannot get his mouth around the bottle. The mascot then trips over himself, landing with a thud as he spills the last of his whiskey.

Brad Blood: "Okay. It's King."

Jim Jackson: "He's dressed up like a Care Bear who's had one too many drinks."

Brad Blood: "That would make an awesome Care Bear."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz protesting to the referee about his opponent. He clearly has no idea what to make of this."

Brad Blood: "That would kinda apply to just about anyone Allister King wrestles against. The referee looks like he's still going to allow him to wear the bear suit, though."

Jim Jackson: "And here we go. Schwarz looking pretty discombobulated, trying to figure out how to wrestle a mascot. Allister King...is holding onto the ropes. It seems he's still quite drunk."

Brad Blood: "Maybe we should call him Care Bear Allister, at least for this match."

Jim Jackson: "Schwarz kicks King's legs out from under him! Schwarz on the attack! Allister King throwing some wild punches, but does not connect! Felix Schwarz grabs him...for a backbreaker!"

Brad Blood: "King looks like he's too inebriated to fight back!"

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz whips Allister King into the corner! Crushes him against the turnbuckle with a running high knee!"

Brad Blood: "The Care Bear is scooped up...and slammed onto the mat!"

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz is going up the ropes. Looks like he wants to end this as quickly as possible."

Brad Blood: "The smell of Care Bear fur with booze and puke isn't something you'd want to sniff for too long."

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz with a flying clothesline off the top AND HE DECAPITATES THE CARE BEAR!"

Brad Blood: "LITERALLY! The Care Bear's head just popped off!"

Jim Jackson: "Allister King's lost his mascot mask! But the momentum of the hit has staggered Felix Schwarz!"

Brad Blood: "Looks like King ducked just in time to just lose his mask!"

Jim Jackson: "Allister, oh we have the GoodFella coming out!"

Brad Blood: "Looks like he is going after Schwarz! That may not be a good idea! We have a drunken Care Bear in there too!"

Jim Jackson: "Felix Schwarz sees Arnold Bold coming down to the ring! Schwarz smashes him down with a big kick to the face! He's grabbing him by the throat! It's the Overdose!"

Brad Blood: "Felix Schwarz is thrown around like a Care Bear chew toy!"

Jim Jackson: "Allister King is trying to stay on his feet! He's still thoroughly drunk! He's...he's pointing to the Care Bear symbol on his tummy!"

Brad Blood: "What is he doing!?"

Jim Jackson: "He's...going for a Care Bear stare?"

Brad Blood: "He...he is! He's counting down to the Stare!"

As Allister does the countdown over a stunned Felix Schwarz, he suddenly gags. Before anyone realized it, a splooge soup of whiskey, soup and other regurgitated items splash all over Schwarz.

Jim Jackson: "Yuck!"

Brad Blood: "I guess...that's his Care Bear Stare!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "The winner of the match, by pinfall, Allister King!"

Jim Jackson: "Yuck!"

Brad Blood: "I agree! Someone get a cleaning crew down there!"

Jim Jackson: "GoodFella cost Schwarz this match! And probably a hefty laundry bill!"

The referee begins to raise Allister King's arm in victory. Then, he thinks better of it, and just points to the costumed King from beyond puking range. The GoodFella, meanwhile, backtracks up the ramp, smirking all the while.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Thesqu10

The fans are instantly screeching, squealing and swooning as they hear the music of the one wrestling superstar who can elicit such a deep, visceral, primal reaction from them. The volume in the building only gets much louder as he steps out, posing for the fans screaming for him.

He is none other than the apex athlete of the wrestling ring, the mystery man known only as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Hello, my luscious legions of lustful, loving and loquaciously loud fans!"

They cheer even more for him.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I thank you all for the text messages, email, letters and naked pictures you have sent me to help soothe the disappointment I feel over the outcome of the Primo Ultimo Battle Royal!"

They cheers turn to jeers as the fans react to Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's loss in that title match. He waits for the hostile booing to die down, before he continues.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I was bested by opportunities not going my way! And so now we have a roast duck hamster monkey creampie devil sex worshipping carbon copy as a champion! For the first time ever! He has dreamed so long about winning his first ever world championship! And now, he can no longer be called a virgin!"

They boo at the mention of Shogun.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "We all remember how desperate he is to plunge the ULOL INTO HIS DARKNESS! Shogun wants to sink everything and everyone in the ULOL into his haunting everlasting darkness! But what exactly does he mean by that!"

Brad Blood: "That's...actually a good question. Now that Shogun's the champ, what's he gonna do?"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "The carbon copy has spent so many years being the best carbon copy out there! And now that he has become the best devil turkey poodle strawberry shortcake catfish sex fiend out there, there is only but one logical way he can plunge the ULOL into HIS darkness!"

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Eew10

Brad Blood: "AAAAAAAAAGH!"

The screams of terror and disgust drown out everything else for a good long moment, as the graphic looms large on the big videoscreen.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Shogun has spent years perfecting his technique! He will try swallowing up the ULOL in HIS darkness! He will not want a rival for his supremacy! So he will first go swallow up the General Manager Marcus Troy into HIS darkness!"

A graphic of Marcus Troy appears, then falls into the hole.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Because he is unstoppable, Jack Johnson cannot stop himself from cutting in front of the line to fall into the darkness!"

A graphic of UJJ appears, falling into the hole.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Shogun would like the challenge of taking on two men at once! So he shall try to swallow them too!"

A graphic of the Entourage appears, falling into the sphincter of terror like water down a drain.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Shogun would want to relive the drama of the miners in Chile! So Sr. Gonzales will not be spared!"

A graphic flashes of Sr. Gonzales, stepping into the escape capsule used to save the 33 miners. Him and the capsule fall into the pink, wet abyss on the giant videoscreen.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Tp-chile-rescue-capsule-rtr

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing "Shogun wants to take everyone into the darkness under his pants! No matter how big they are! Because he has spent so many years practicing!"

We see a picture of the planet Jupiter, with the Morbidly Obese Man's face on it. The planet is sucked into the hole.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "This is what the Shogun has in his wet dreams! This is what Shogun thinks about every time he has the runs! This is what Shogun has wasted his life for, trying to play Katamari with himself so he can be the most depraved hedgehog mouse watermelon chicken a la king bagel orangutan goat sex worshipper! He wants to plunge EVERYTHING into HIS DARKNESS! Now we need to see how much room his darkness will have! Thank you very much, my legions of loving fans!"

The masked marvel of the ring makes his exit, with the giant sphincter still looming above everyone.

Just before the masked wrestler could exit the ring and while the giant sphincter is still on display the ground reverberates as the familiar quaking sensation that announces the entrance of ULOL's most massive superstar arrives.


The Morbidly Obese Man: "Whoa there Q! You give Shogun too much credit. The only shadow that will be seen is the one cast by me looming over your sorry asses as I hold the Primo Ultimo title up in the air. You envision me as being sucked into Shogun's darkness? You are sorely mistaken my masked friend."

It is then that The Morbidly Obese Man notices that the crowd is not listening to him, instead they are still drawn to the giant sphincter on the screen.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Oh fer cryin' out loud, someone turn that thing off!"

The screen fizzles and quickly blinks out.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Now Shogun may hold the title for now, but he is only a champ because of an accident with the ring ropes last week. You think he would be standing there holding the title if the ring ropes didn't break? Of course not."

The Morbidly Obese Man looks smugly into the eyes peering out of the mask.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Shogun may be tough but he is not the biggest threat in the ring tonight. Best you remember that."

The Morbidly Obese Man turns around and exits to the back.


The globetrotting grappling great of the wrestling world known as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is quick to rebut the challenge of the Morbidly Obese Man.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You may be the most massive, mobile mountain of larded manmeat to ever step into the wrestling ring! But I can tell you with all confidence that our carbon copy champion has had years of practice inserting things into his darkness!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing makes expressive gestures while he continues to talk about Shogun.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "He started out small with beads and eggs! Then it was puppies! Then bottles! And live goats! He wants to be the biggest, deepest and most flexible hole of darkness wrestling has ever seen!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing spreads his hands further apart with each item he describes, until finally they are as far apart as he can manage.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You may think he will not be able to take the wide, hairy girth of your fat yet rigid manmeat! And I would like to agree with you! But as Shogun himself said, he has used the best years of his life getting ready to plunge as many things up his darkness as he can! And you and I know that practice, persistence and a lot of lube can go a long way!"

Several members of the audience can be heard loudly vomiting in response to Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's graphic description of the rectal horrors Shogun has promised to unleash on the world. We see a few people in one section making panicked gestures for help, as one person gives another CPR.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Shogun has promised to plunge the ULOL into HIS DARKNESS! He will ask all of us to put things in HIS DARKNESS! He cannot wait to make you wear HIS DARKNESS like a hat! He is no longer a virgin to a world title! Now he wants to have HIS DARKNESS host the monkey goose beaver hobo milkman choirboy oak tree leopard octopus tuna salad with fries gangbang of the century! And he will bring a gallon of lube for you, Morbidly Obese Man!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points towards the Morbidly Obese Man, the eyes under his mask flashing with utter certainty of what he has said. Time seems to stand still for a long moment, as he and the Morbidly Obese Man exchange hostile glares, while people vomit and faint all around them.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Shogun is practicing as I stand in this ring! He is inserting the entire road crew into HIS DARKNESS! All by himself! All at the same time! We should go check on him, my massive mountain of larded manmeat! We should see how wide and deep Shogun's hole is! So we will be ready for him!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing exits the ring, walking right up to the Morbidly Obese Man. He glances at the fat man, before heading towards the back. Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing narrowly misses getting splashed with vomit, as he passes by a fan utterly sickened by the horrors he has described about Shogun.

A Victim, A Target by Misery Signals blasts though the arena speakers ans the lights begin to flash on and off. As the lyrics begin Shogun bursts from behind the curtains with fire erupting from the ramp beside him, his Primo Ultimo championship around his waist. Shogun begins to make his way to the ring with a broad smile on his face his eyes still show the hatred for the people in the arena and the pure intensity can still be seen in Shoguns body language as he walks down the ramp. As he makes it to the ring he runs up and rolls into the ring taking the title off his waist and hoisting it into the air with one arm before putting it over one shoulder. Shogun picks up a mic from a ring attendant and begins to speak as all the lights go out in the arena and a spotlight shines down on Shogun.

Shogun: "A victory was won last week. A victory against the oppression of humanity...A victory against those who hold back and torture the strange and the different."

Shogun holds the belt into the air earning a roar of boos from the crowd.

Shogun: "I won this belt last week. I showed all of you that I truly am the best wrestler in the world today and the best competitor ever to step into the squared circle. I did this by defeating 9 other wrestlers in a battle royale."

Shogun begins to chuckle.

Shogun: "I told you the nightmare would come true and it did The Demonic God is the Primo Ultimo Champion! My dream has finally come true and the nightmare has only just begun for the rest of ULOL! You see you can crack as many jokes as you want but the events of last week can NEVER be erased no matter how hard you try!"

Shogun laughs out loud as the fans boo.

Shogun: "You see no matter what you do now I will be in the history books as the FIRST...EVER Primo Ultimo Champion and you can NEVER make it go away! I have what everyone wants but cant have. I am the man in this federation higher than anyone else UNTOUCHABLE!"

Shogun holds his arms out and looks up into the spotlight with his eyes close soaking in the crowds jeers before speaking again.

Shogun: "How does it feel knowing that all the you suck chants in the world cant touch me now? This belt means that I AM the best in the WORLD just like I said I was! Now just as this arena is engulfed in darkness I will systematically destroy any and all challengers until I finally force you all to understand that I...AM...GOD and I will NOT go away!"

Shogun: Tonight this federations decent begins with my first 3 sacrifices. Q...Conway...and the big man himself. None of them realize what they are getting themselves into when they step into the ring against me tonight, You see now that this belt is mine I will fight tooth and nail to keep it! So good luck tonight fools because this is only the beginning...soon you'll all be calling me God as well..."

Shogun drops the mic and leaves the ring with the Primo Ultimo title as the lights return to the building.

The disguised death defier of the wrestling world tilts his head slightly to one side, as he pays attention to the rebuttal being given by the Primo Ultimo.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Eddie_10

No, not him.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Hark! He has swallowed up the road crew faster than I thought! And now he is out here, ready to show the whole of the ULOL HIS DARKNESS!"

The masked marvel known as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points to the giant video screen, but is immediately met by the panicked cries of the fans who desperately ask him not to show what cannot be unseen. He decides not to do so.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I think there is some confusion! The only one who does not know what he is getting into in our big match, is the one who has the Sphincter of Terror in the Seat of His Pants!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing casually points to Shogun. Cameras flash as fans and reporters take pictures of this confrontation. We overhear several journalists at ringside giving a live blow by blow for the benefit of billions watching around the world.

Reporter 1: "Shogun has the Sphincter of Terror! According to sources it is a mile wide!"

Reporter 2: "...according to our sources, Shogun's darkness is actually quite pink."

Reporter 3: "With Shogun's secret weapon now exposed, the question fans want to know is whether he has a bigger, tastier fart than the Stank Lord."

This is all white noise to the iconic icon of the wrestling world, as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing expands on what he has to say to the first Primo Ultimo champ.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I do not understand though why you think your victory is a blow for those who are different, Shogun! I do not think you are different at all! You are VERY impressive as a copy of Bloodflame! It's almost as if I am talking to him right now!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing quickly changes track.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I know what I am getting myself into! The glitzy glamor gold man Alexander Conway knows what he is getting himself into! The mobile mountain of mammoth blubber manmeat standing beside me knows what he is getting himself into! We are all going to step into YOUR DARKNESS!"

Several very loud EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWs are heard.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I know, my loyal legions of loving fans! I myself am leery of facing the prostate of the Noah's ark animal kinky sex buffet with mints devil worshipper! And I will admit I do not know what the outcome will be for me! But! But! I do know this!"

Despite their queasiness, the fans go silent as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points once again to the Primo Ultimo.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "The dinosaurs came first too, Shogun! And they became a theme park attraction! To be ridden by EVERYBODY! That is going to happen to YOUR DARKNESS! And I have tickets!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points to Shogun, then gestures to himself as he prances about like a rodeo cowboy riding a bronco.

The masked wrestler loudly yells YEEEEEHA! as he takes his leave.

Suddently, the entrance tunnel widdens and a limousine comes through. It drives towards the ring and then it stops. Gonzalez comes out of it.

Sr. Gonzalez: "Aghh, that's disgusting! Come on! This is a serious show! We are on TV now! TV! And thats the reason I wanted to come out now. Everything till now was like, a trial, but now that we are on TV and we are actually gonna be seen by so much more people, now it's gonna be serious, and I'm gonna be serious."

Yup, serious.

Sr. Gonzalez: "No more loosing now when everybody's watching! Shogun, I hope you realize that you wont have that title for too long. You are not made for it. And Quio-blablabla, don't be so disgusting for god's sake!"

Gonzalez climbs back into his limousine, wich has to leave the arena in reverse, not being able to turn around.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Lairof10

Manolo Ferrer enters the posh office of Marcus Troy, General Manager of United League of Lunatics. He shakes hands with Troy as he takes his seat.

Manolo Ferrer: "Taufik's become a story on TMZ, thanks to him suddenly vanishing without a trace. The police and the investigators I've hired haven't been able to find him. I certainly didn't think his not winning the battle royal would have led to this."

Mr. Ferrer is clearly disappointed with recent events.

Manolo Ferrer: "Your office has set up a tag match between the Entourage versus Jack Johnson and the Morbidly Obese Man. If my client hadn't gone off and disappeared, I would be preparing them to take this challenge on. But now, I'm asking you to either make it a one on one match, or allow us to find a replacement for Taufik. A handicap match may stroke Johnson and Obese Man's egos, but it just means they need to join forces to beat down one man. That's not exactly a great way for them to debut whatever tag team arrangements they have."

Mr. Ferrer quickly adds an offer.

Manolo Ferrer: "I'm willing to have the match booked as the Entourage vs Obese Man and Johnson until the show starts, in case Mr. Taufik is somehow found and makes it to the show. Preferably fit to compete. But if he doesn't, then I would like you to either let us recruit a replacement for him, or make it GoodFella versus either Obese Man or Johnson."

The general manager of ULOL looks into the eyes of Manolo Ferrer as he takes a puff from his cigar. He casually leans back relaxed and sets the cigar on an ashtray, a trickle of smoke escaping from his lips.

Marcus Troy: "Mr. Ferrer, I understand your position to keep your clients' interests at hand but you have to remember that Taufik has signed a contract with me. He too is in violation of this contract if he doesn't show up for a match he is booked in thus he will be fined."

Marcus Troy leans forward resting his elbows on his huge oak desk.

Marcus Troy: "Now in the instance Taufik doesn't appear, I have made a decision... The match against The Morbidly Obese Man and "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson shall continue but you have the option to find another wrestler to fill in for Taufik. If you are unable to do so then Mr. Bold shall have to face his opponents in a 2 on 1 handicap match."

A slow smile spreads across the face of Marcus Troy as a deep frown appears in Manolo Ferrer's face...

Mr. Ferrer shrugs in acceptance.

Manolo Ferrer: "Fair enough. I'm more concerned with minimizing the fallout that may hit my other client because of Mr. Taufik's actions, as Mr. Bold too is totally in the dark as to what has happened. That's about it really."

The manager of the Entourage takes his leave.

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

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Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10
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The Morbidly Obese Man
The Morbidly Obese Man

Posts : 2990
Join date : 2008-12-29
Age : 43

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PostSubject: Re: Lucha Loco 12/02/2010    Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  I_icon_minitimeThu Dec 02, 2010 6:56 am

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Alexan10VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Quioae10
VSLucha Loco 12/02/2010  Shogun10VS
Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Themor12

Jim Jackson: "Well now, here's the main event everyone has been waiting for, a four corners match for the ULOL Primo Ultimo title! This will also be Shogun's first title defense."

Brad Blood: "A four corners match with the last four men in the battle royale last week. Shogun really has his hands full with this match."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is a four corners match for the ULOL Primo Ultimo title and is the main event of the evening. Introducing first the challengers, coming to the ring, here's Alexander Conway!"

"Hunt You Down" by Saliva blares throughtout the arena as Alexander Conway makes his way to the ring.

Jim Jackson: "Alexander Conway came up second in the battle royale last week, and he has a past rivalry with Shogun in other federations, it is clear that he is a top pick to contend for the title."

Brad Blood: "Conway seems oozing with confidence as he stroll out here tonight."

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing the next challenger, he's the masked enigma, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing!"

Nu-metal music begins to play as a highlight reel of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing runs on the ULOLTron. A horde of reporters and photographers gather at the stage entrance, taking pictures and giving a blow by blow of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's every move as he steps out for his match. Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing waves to the fans as he slowly makes his way to the ring.

Jim Jackson: "Probably one of the most eccentric personalities to ever enter the wrestling ring, Q is a fan favorite everywhere he goes."

Brad Blood: "Q had some pretty interesting things to say earlier tonight about Shogun which includes some very graphic photos."

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing the last challenger, The Morbidly Obese Man!"


The earth reverberated and shook as the monstrosity known as The Morbidly Obese Man squeezed himself out of the now visibly cracked entrance tunnel. There is no entrance music and no video playing on the Titan Tron. Just one massive form that looks bigger than an elephant. The crowd stares in stunned silence, not knowing what to make of the super-sized behemoth making his way down the entrance ramp as the floors creak with every step. As The Morbidly Obese Man reaches the ring he climbs up the steel steps the crowd wonders how this "thing" can enter the ring. But lo and behold in a feat of utter incredibility and great fat flexing ability, The Morbidly Obese Man somehow squeezed through the ring ropes and enters the ring which sighs heavily under his weight.

Jim Jackson: "And here comes one of the more dangerous men in the roster. The Morbidly Obese Man or TMOM for short could be the one who take the belt away from Shogun tonight."

Brad Blood: "Good lord! Look at his cellulite jiggle! It's so disturbing yet I cannot look away!"

Jasmine Lee: "And introducing, he's your current and reigning ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion, the Demonic God... Shogun!"

"A Victim, A Target" by Misery Signals blasts though the arena speakers ans the lights begin to flash on and off. As the lyrics begin Shogun bursts from behind the curtains with fire erupting from the ramp beside him. Shogun begins to make his way to the ring with a look of pure intensity on his face. as he makes it to the ring he runs up and rolls into the ring the expression on his face unchanged.

Jim Jackson: "The champ makes his entrance and it looks like the crowd is not on his side."

Brad Blood: "Well the crowd knows nothing, Shogun won that title last week in the battle royale against NINE other men. they can boo all they want but unless someone else gets pinned tonight, Shogun is our champion."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And it looks like Q and TMOM will be kicking things off while Conway and Shogun waits in their respective corners. TMOM sends Q to the ropes with an Irish whip... A back body drop sends Q pummeling through the air and crashing to the mat. Q quickly rolls up... Oh! A chop from TMOM's gigantic hands levels him!"

Brad Blood: "TMOM goes for the early cover! Will he get it?"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Q gets a shoulder up! TMOM sets him up... Face plant! Q get's his mask drilled to the mat! TMOM is not done, he picks Q up and sends him to the ropes... Q ducks below a clothesline from hell! TMOM turns around... He telegraphs a back body drop and Q counters it with a swinging neckbreaker!"

Brad Blood: "Oh! Q actually levelled the big man with that one! Looks like Q is going high risk and climbs up to the top turnbuckles... Shogun shakes the ropes from the apron! Q loses balance... He leaps into the air anyways..."

Jim Jackson: "AMAZING! Q twists his body in mid-air and still pulls off a corkscrew splash! Q hooks the leg..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "TMOM kicks out! Q looks like he's gonna attempt anothe high risk maneuver..."

Jim Jackson: "Springboard moonsault... NO!!! TMOM rolls away! Wait! Q lands on his feet... OH!!! TMOM takes Q down with a stiff clothesline! TMOM lifts Q up on his shoulders... Q grabs on to the top rope and slips down! Q with an Irish whip... REVERSED BY TMOM!!! REVERSED AGAIN BY Q!!! TMOM is sent to the corner! Q quickly attacks and hits a spinning bulldog in the corner! TMOM is down!"

Brad Blood: "Q quickly hooks the leg... Did he do enough damage to the big man?"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "TMOM kicks out! TMOM groggily gets back up... He staggers to Conway's corner... Conway tags himself in! TMOM is sent out to his corner by the referee! Q comes charging in... right into a rolling kick by Conway! Conway waits for Q to get up... SUPER KICK CONNECTS! Q is down! Conway quickly hooks the leg."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Q kicks out by the count of two! Q is slowing down... Conway has the advantage now."

Jim Jackson: "A DDT by Conway and Q goes down! Conway quickly grabs the legs and locks in a Texas cloverleaf! Q tries to reach for the ropes..."

Brad Blood: "Q is just a few inches short of the ropes... Conway applies more pressure... Q lunges one more time... He gets it! Q gets his hand on the bottom rope but Conway is not letting go! The ref starts counting..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three! Four! Fi..."

Jim Jackson: "Conway releases Q just short of disqualification. Q limps to his feet... Conway takes Q down with an arm drag... Q rolls away before Conway can come near and do more damage, wise move by Q."

Brad Blood: "Wise? That's cowardly... He ran away!"

Jim Jackson: "Alexander Conway stalks Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing... They lock arms and engage in a test of strength... Clearly Q is at a disadvantage against the fresher man."

Brad Blood: "Q is pushed back to the corner... The ref comes in to break both men apart..."

Jim Jackson: "Conway sneaks a throat thrust in just as the ref separates them... A stiff chop by Conway! Q chops back with a stiffer chop! And another! And another! Conway is being driven back... A dropkick finally sends Conway down! I think Q is signaling for his finisher! Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing cannot help but feel angered by Alexander Conway for reasons only Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing knows..."

Brad Blood: "Conway realizes the danger he is in... He quickly scampers out of the way and tags in Shogun! The champ has finally entered the squared circle!"

Jim Jackson: "Shogun batters Q with heavy punches. Snap suplex sends the masked wrestler to the canvas. Shogun is not done... He lifts Q and holds Q up... Delayed brainbuster suplex! Shogun held that one for ages! Shogun for the cover...."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Q managed to kick out of that one but he certainly is winding down, he barely made it out before the count of three."

Jim Jackson: "Q gets caught with a short powerbomb from Shogun. Shogun grabs Q and lifts him up... Tilt-a-whirl slam! Q has gone limp! Shogun goes for the cover..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Thr..."

Brad Blood: "Q somehow reached out and grabbed on to the bottom rope! Lucky break for Q! Shogun can't believe it!"

Jim Jackson: "Shogun is setting up for his finisher Demonic Sacrifice... Shogun lifts Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing up into into the air in a half nelson... Q somehow slips free! Q leaps and tags in TMOM!!!"

Brad Blood: "Here comes the big man! TMOM charges in in full force! This won't end well..."

Jim Jackson: "Shoulder tackle sends Shogun flying! The TMOM express has landed! Shogun gets up but TMOM sends him down with a clothesline!"

Brad Blood: "Damn! He flipped a man Shogun's size with that clothesline!"

Jim Jackson: "The Morbidly Obese Man hits some punches. Shogun pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Front legsweep slam by Shogun takes the big man down! Shogun is hits a few stomps on the downed big man."

Brad Blood: "LOOK! "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson comes running down the aisle with a chair! TMOM goes to Irish whip Shogun into the ropes. UJJ prepares to swing the chair..."

Jim Jackson: "SHOGUN REVERSES! UJJ accidentally smacks TMOM with a chair to the head! Shogun floors The Morbidly Obese Man. Shogun with a drop kick sends the chair back into UJJ's face! Conway has entered the ring... Q has entered the ring! IT'S CHAOS IN THE RING!!!"

Brad Blood: "THIS IS AWESOME!!! The ref is helpless to restore order..."

Jim Jackson: "Q just flattened Conway with a springboard crossbody! Shogun throws Q over the top rope! Shogun stands over The Morbidly Obese Man who is lying on the mat face up and grasps his leg, Shogun then does a spinning toe hold and grasps the other leg, crossing them into a four locking in the Demonic Reckoning!"

Brad Blood: "TMOM TAPS!!! TMOM TAPS!!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and STILL ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion, Shogun!"

Jim Jackson: "And Shogun somehow retains the title! What a match! What a match!"

Brad Blood: "Shogun quickly grabs his belt and hightails it out of the ring! It looks like TMOM's plan to have UJJ interfere backfired."

"Make Them Suffer" by Cannibal Corpse starts playing on the speakers as smoke rises from the floor. Dressed in a three piece Armani suit, the general manager of United League of Lunatics appears on the ULOL Tron.

Marcus Troy: "Congratulations to Shogun for your first successful title defense."

The crowd boos loudly.

Marcus Troy: "Wait! Before you all start booing again, hear me first. Tonight Shogun has shown us why he deserves the title, but I know many of you are asking after defeating these three men here tonight, who else can fight against Shogun? Well after much consultation, it seems the next in line for the Primo Ultimo title is Allister King and Sr. Gonzalez!"

The crowd cheers wildly.

Marcus Troy: "So next week! The main event! We shall have our champion defend against both wrestlers in a triangle match!"

The crowd's cheers grow louder as Shogun stares at the screen angrily.

Marcus Troy: "Oh, don't give me that look Shogun, being a champion does come with some perks like having a bigger paycheck but it also comes with challenges and what type of champion are you if you don't prove yourself next week? I mean after this tonight, I'm sure that King and Gonzalez would be no problem for you."

Marcus Troy grins evilly as the screen blinks off.

Brad Blood: "What an announcement! What an announcement."

Jim Jackson: "Shogun doesn't seem pleased. Another title defense next week. Will Shogun still be at a hundred percent?"

Lucha Loco 12/02/2010  Ulolse10

Jim Jackson: "Well tonight is a night that kept us at the edge of our seats."

Brad Blood: "You got that right. We had great matches, great promos and a great announcement from our boss Marcus Troy before the night ended. This is truly a good way to kick off our debut telecast here at UHF Channel 62!"

Jim Jackson: "The question in everyone's mind now is how will Shogun react next week?"

Brad Blood: "And if Taufik will appear in a milk carton next week..."

Jim Jackson: "Unfortunately that's all the time we have for tonight. For my partner Brad Blood, this is Jim Jackson signing off. Don't forget to catch us again next week here in UHF Channel 62! Good night and goodbye!"

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