Lucha Loco 04/03/2011

Subject: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:52 am

Jim Jackson: "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another edition of Lucha Loco. We have a great card for you all tonight. Including the fallout from last Sunday's PPV. Joining me here at ringside is my partner Brad Blood."

Brad Blood: "That's right Jimbo, after last week's PPV we have had a lot of interesting happenings, Zombie turning on Conway, Taufik walking away with the Boleto Dorado."

Jim Jackson: "The return of Boy Bakla..."

Brad Blood: "Augh! Don't remind me!"

Jim Jackson: "Anyway, things are bound to get more exciting here tonight so stay tuned folks as THE LUNACY BEGINS!"

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The sputtering of the engine is heard echoing in the parking lot as a very PINK Vespa comes into view. The PINK Vespa stops and ULOL's returning transsexual wrestler Boy Bakla alights from it and takes off it's PINK helmet and puts it on it's scooter. Bakla casually strolls over to the parking attendant who shows a little tint of homophobia.

Boy Bakla: "Hey there big boy, I want you to keep your eyes on my Vespa. You see I LOOOOOOOOOOVE my scooter and if, God forbids, anything happens to it..."

Boy Bakla traces a finger over the parking attendant's chest...

Boy Bakla: "Let's just say that even though you are my type, I will hold you responsible and you will experience pain... And pleasure, but mostly pain which you have never experienced before. Am I clear on this?"

The now visibly frightened parking attendant can only nod in response.

Boy Bakla: "Good, I'm glad we understand each other."

With that Boy Bakla turns around with flair and makes it's way to the doors, before Bakla finally enters the building, it turns around and blows a kiss to the parking attendant who shudders in disgust as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Scene opens to find a very distraught looking Bianca de Sade walking down the corridor. She is rarely ever seen in the arena since the last PPV which saw TBH's career finish. She looks like she was crying a while ago as her mascara has run down her cheeks. Two workers, obviously skiving off of their duties notice her. One of them speaks.

Worker: "Hey Bianca, hows about me and you go warm up for your match against Samantha, I hear Hawk's locker is free."

The worker winks at Lady B while his partner can be heard snickering. Lady B just turns and walks on. But the worker grasps her by the shoulder. Lady B turns instantly and lands a solid right hand to the nose of the worker. His partner doesn't hang around as he sprints away. Lady B grasps the worker, whose nose is spurting out blood.

Lady Bianca de Sade: "Listen, dickhead! You look at me, touch me or even attempt to take the piss and you'll find out first hand what TBH is going through! Got that?!"

The worker lets out a little whine as Lady B hooks him again with a right hand. Lady B pushes him to the ground and storms off. Unlucky Samantha.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The IRA are sitting in their Office discussing matches for later that night

Allister King: "Should we be in a match?"

Samantha Collins: "Yeah you should, Even if it's a singles match. It's just to show that you are willing to fight as well."

Scott Logan: "Boo!! Here how about you put Sammie in a match since she thinks she can do it. Maybe a bra and panties match?"

Allister King: "I like that idea, maybe they are wet as well."

Allister and Scott laugh before turning towards Sammie. Sammie stares daggers into them as they start to get scared.

Samantha Collins: "How about you Scott? Why not put you into a match unless your too scared?"

Scott Logan: "I will take on any woman in a bra and panties match. And as i lean over hear for the pin i will know that I'm gonna get some that night ha ha!"

Samantha Collins: "How about a barbed wire rope match against 3 men?"

Scott Logan: "No that doesn't turn me on at all."

Allister King: "Ok how about this? Scott will fight ahh lets see ....... Lucian Blackheart next week."

Samantha Collins: "Make it a title match. That what both of them will be fighting their best and the crowd walk away happy."

Scott Logan: "Yeah I accidentally dropped a half ounce of weed in the crowd. that might be why They will be happy."

Allister King: "Ok it's done now go out they and do forget to smile."

Allister laughs and Sammie smiles as Scott walks away.

Allister King: "Oh yeah, did I mention you are also up for a match tonight too Sammie?"

Sammie loses her smile and a loud thud is heard as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jim Jackson: "Welcome to the first match of the evening folks, a divas' match between Lady Bianca de Sade and Samantha Collins."

Brad Blood: "Woo! Yeah! More women's wrestling, this should have been a jello match for more eye candy."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first Lady Bianca de Sade."

"Rebirthing: by Skillet blasts over the arena as Lady Bianca de Sade comes out from the entrance tunnel. She walks down to the ring. She waves to the fans as she enters the ring.

Jasmine Lee: "And introducing her opponent for the evening, Samantha Collins!"

Soundgarden's "Black Rain" begins to blast from the PA system as Samantha Collins makes her way out to the entrance ramp. She stands and lights a cigarette before heading down to the ring. She drops the lit cigarette and stomps it out before entering the ring.

Jim Jackson: "Lady Bianca de Sade or Lady B for short has been out of action due to the fact that she is taking care of her significant other after a horrendous injury The British Hawk suffered two months ago. Samantha Collins on the other hand, though she hasn't won any matches lately, she's been wrestling and is at top form. Any predictions on who will win Brad?"

Brad Blood: "Dang it's hard to pick... Both women are so... Delectable! Lady B has that finesse and charm while Samantha Collins is a spunky redhead!"

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Lady B charges in fast ducking below a right hook by Collins. Collins takes a chop from Lady B. Irish whip by Lady B sends Samantha Collins to the ropes."

Brad Blood: "Lady B ducks down for a back body drop attempt but Collins kicks her in the face! That will leave a mark."

Jim Jackson: "Collins follows up with a few hard shots... Irish whip by the Irishwoman... NO! Reversed by Lady B and Samantha Collins runs into the referee!"

Brad Blood: "Whoop! There goes the ref! What a wuss, getting knocked down and out by women."

Jim Jackson: "Enziguri by Lady B misses! Russian leg sweep by Collins sends Lady B to the canvas. Collins goes high risk climbing to the top turnbuckle... Diving headbutt from Collins. Pinfall attempt, but the referee is out."

Brad Blood: "Man, how long is that ref going to be out for? It was just a bump from a girl!"

Jim Jackson: "Lady Bianca de Sade fights back to her feet. She gets stunned by a hard elbow to the face! Samantha Collins lifts Lady B up... Lady B slips out the back of a Samantha Collins bodyslam. Lady B hits a dropkick on Samantha Collins."

Brad Blood: "Ooh! That sent Collins staggering back. Oh finally, the referee is showing some life again. Get up you wuss!"

Jim Jackson: "Irish whip by Lady B sends Collins smashing into the turnbuckles back first. Lady Bianca de Sade with a running dropkick into the corner. Cover!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Close call for Samantha Collins... Lady B still needs to do more than that to put the GM's girlfriend away."

Jim Jackson: "Flying elbow drop by Lady B connects! She again hooks the leg but Collins kicks out! Lady B tries to lift Collins up... Collins blocks a suplex attempt. Back heel kick from Collins. Irish whip by Collins... She charges in just as Lady B hits the ropes... Stiff clothesline connects as both women go over the top rope and fall outside."

Brad Blood: "Woo! Now it just degenerated into a brawl! The referee starts the ten count."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three!"

Jim Jackson: "It has turned into a cat fight folks, both women have now transitioned from brawling into hair pulling!"

Brad Blood: "CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT! WOO!!!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Four! Five! Six!"

Jim Jackson: "Both girls are so into the cat fight they do not notice they only have a few seconds left before they both get counted out."

Brad Blood: "Haha! Samantha Collins is tugging on Lady B's panties from the back! That wedgie must hurt... OH LOOKIE! SUPER CAMEL TOE!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Seven! Eight! Nine!"

Jim Jackson: "Whoa! Big hit by Lady B stuns Collins, Lady B tries to get back into the ring... WAIT! COLLINS GRABS ON TO HER LEG!!!!"

Brad Blood: "Lady B tries to shake her off but can't!"

Jack B. Nimble: "Ten!"

Jim Jackson: "The ref is calling for the bell! It's a double count out!"

Brad Blood: "Aw... Tsk tsk... Too bad for Lady B..."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest has been declared a draw due to a double count out!"

Jim Jackson: "Well looks like no one walks away with the win tonight."

Brad Blood: "Dang, it's over already? I want more eye candy..."

Jim Jackson: "WAIT! It looks like both women are not satisfied with a draw! They begin cat fighting again! The ref quickly steps in-between them getting clawed in the process... Security has finally come in to separate the two..."

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:52 am

A pale-looking Christopher Bain is standing in his locker room.

Christopher Bain: "I know, I know! I still smell like vomit, that stench just doesn't want to come off, no matter how much or how hard I scrub! Thanks Johnson. At least you were unstoppable in one thing that night."

Christopher shakes his head before continuing.

Christopher Bain: "Anyway, it seems Stank Lord has accepted my challenge and we'll be facing again tonight. Good. This time he will fall. This time, I will show him some humility. I will force him to leave Stephanie Dawson alone....for good. Stank Lord, hopefully after our match, you will realize how unbecoming your stench and your behaviours are, and will do your best to remedy them. I think you would enjoy actually having people want to talk to you, and have people actually stand being within 20 feet of you."

Christopher suddenly lurches forward, hands grasping his mouth. He removes long enough to quickly say a few words.

Christopher Bain: "I need to go, this smell is just terrible!"

Christopher turns and runs off to the bathroom, leaving the cameraman alone. As the scene fades, the words "About time he shut up, as if I really wanted to stand here smelling vomit all damn day." are picked up as the scene fades.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The doors to Eunice P. Winslow swings open as Boy Bakla strolls in with gusto. Bakla sits on the chair in front of Eunice's table and crosses it's legs. It's eyes shows amusement that the vice-general manager of ULOL is not amused to see it in the premises at all.

Boy Bakla: "Eunice, Eunice, Eunice... It's been a while... I know we have infamously not gotten along in the past, but let us let bygones be bygones. I don't want to butt heads with you here in ULOL as I did in United Front Wrestling. I am not expecting us to be BFFs, but we can at least be civil and stay out of each others' hair. I'm sure you have other things to worry about now that you are basically more or less in charge of this place after Marcus Troy's untimely departure."

Boy Bakla leans back and smiles at Eunice waiting for a reply.

The feisty vice-general manager of ULOL puts down the tea cup she has been sipping. The tasted of the pleasant Darjeeling tea suddenly turns real bitter in her mouth as one of her most hated wrestling personalities sits across from her. Revealing no expression on her face Eunice P. Winslow replies in an indifferent tone.

Eunice P. Winslow: "You are wearing my name thin saying it more than once Bakla. You are correct in the assumption that I don't like you and believe me, that if not for that drunkard of a general manager approving your entry here to ULOL, I would never have hired you. You speak of being civil? Yes I can be civil. You speak of staying out of each others' hair?"

Eunice P. Winslow slams her palms on her desk as she stands up.

Eunice P. Winslow: "That's not going to happen Bakla. Even last week when you re-debuted on "Donde Esta El Banyo?!" you come in and attack one of ULOL's wrestler, and for what? Just so that you can look good? You expect me to turn a blind eye to your antics when you aggrieve innocent parties? Raven Connoly did nothing to you yet just to feed your ego, you attacked her with a bat. Well you are facing Connoly tonight and I hope she puts you in your place."

The old lady settles down again, he cold eyes staring straight at the unwelcome wrestler.

Boy Bakla nonchalantly shrugs it's shoulders.

Boy Bakla: "I knew you'd be that way Eunice. Well you can't blame a girl for trying..."

Bakla stands up and turns to leave, it pauses for a while and looks at Eunice again.

Boy Bakla: "You think Raven will be able to beat me? I have way more experience that that pigtailed bimbo. I've fought way tougher opponents in the ring and Raven Connoly will be nothing but just another stepping stone for me to regain my former glory. I'll be seeing you around Eunice."

With that Bakla leaves the office as the scene turns to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

ZERO CALORIES!!!

ZERO SUGAR!!!

ZERO FAT!!!

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Dietwa10

Available in stores everywhere.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The camera turns on with Stank Lord sitting on a chair in the locker room, he speaks.

Stank Lord: "So, tonight I finally get another chance at the idiot Bain, who by the way had nothing to do what is happening between me and Dawson. You see the last time we fought it ended in a No Contest."

Stank Lord stands up heading to the door.

Stank Lord: "But tonight there will not be a No Contest, I will beat Bain. Then after that I get to have my fun at the next PPV, haha! Where I get to face Stephine Dawson, that's right Stephine Dawson in a match of my choice, and I promise you that the match will be unpredictable and will be nothing like the Fart Challenge I do sometimes. So Bain its time for our match, and for you it is going to Stink! Hahaha!"

He finishes as he walks out the door.

~The camera fades away~

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jasmine Lee: "The following contest is for one fall! Making his way to the ring, here is Stank Lord!"

"This stinks" plays as Stank Lord appears on stage he looks around him, then walks down the ramp and into the ring. He strikes a pose, then leans against the ropes as he waits for his opponent.

Jim Jackson: "We have Stank Lord ready for a rematch against Christopher Bain. These two last tussled in the Boleto Dorado Free Cat Challenge."

Brad Blood: "Stank Lord could've won that Free Cat Challenge, too, if he hadn't gotten distracted by Christopher."

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord struck Bain, and tried farting on him."

Brad Blood: "He wouldn't have done that if Bain wasn't in the match. Bain got Stank Lord so worked up, leading to them getting physical, which cost Stank Lord a shot at the Boleto Dorado."

Jim Jackson: "...that's messed up logic."

Jasmine Lee: "His opponent! He is accompanied to the ring by Ms. Stephanie Dawson. Here is Christopher Bain!"

"Take Over" by Dale Oliver begins playing throughout the arena as Christopher Bain steps out onto the entrance ramp. Stephanie Dawson, ULOL's reporter, comes out after him.

Jim Jackson: "And here comes Christopher Bain, along with Stephanie Dawson. Christopher's chosen to fight on behalf of our roving reporter, in the face of the lawsuit she filed against Stank Lord."

Brad Blood: "This lawsuit's been running much longer than Christopher Bain's tenure in ULOL. I am sure Bain meant well doing all this for Stephanie, but seriously, this is 2011. Stephanie is opting for a wrestling match to settle her lawsuit?"

Jim Jackson: "Stephanie Dawson and Stank Lord appear to want to win their feud in both the courtroom and the wrestling ring."

Christopher and Stephanie walk to the center of the ramp, where he stops for a moment before throwing his arms out wide as a volley of pyrotechnics explode behind him. As they subside, the young man begins walking towards the ring, slapping the hands of any fan who reaches out to him. Stephanie Dawson follows a short distance behind him.

Brad Blood: "But what if Stank Lord wins the lawsuit, but loses the match? Or vice versa? Which trumps the other? The legal verdict or the wrestling win? Not trying to be a dick here, but...did Stank Lord and Stephanie even think this through?"

Jim Jackson: "In any case, Bain will be a lot more motivated to beat Stank Lord. Stank Lord directly caused him to lose his shot at the Boleto Dorado."

When Bain arrives at ringside, he hops onto the ring apron before hopping over the top-rope. He climbs onto a turnbuckle to strike a quick pose for the fans.

Bain hops off the turnbuckle, and Stank Lord immediately farts in his face!

Jim Jackson: "And Stank Lord cheap shots Bain with a massive faceful of gas!"

Brad Blood: "Christopher's staggering around the ring!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord has him REELING! He grabs Bain from behind...DRILLS him to the mat with an inverted powerslam! Stank Lord's making the most of his blindsiding Bain!"

Brad Blood: "Bain was the one strutting around like a peacock! He painted a bullseye on himself when he did that!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord WITH ANOTHER HERCULEAN FART! CHRISTOPHER BAIN IS SENT CRASHING INTO THE CORNER!"

Brad Blood: "What sort of training from hell does Stank Lord do to be able to break gas so often!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord...is taking off his shoe! He seizes Bain from behind, and forces his shoe in his face!"

Brad Blood: "It's the shoebra clutch!"

Jim Jackson: "Bain's already taken two blasts of fart gas! Stephanie looks horrified at what's happening in the ring!"

Brad Blood: "Bain drops to his knees! He's going limp!"

Jim Jackson: "The official checking on Bain! He raises Bain's hand...drops once!"

Brad Blood: "Raises it again...and it falls again!"

Jim Jackson: "And it drops a third time! Bain's out cold! The referee is calling for the bell!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen! The winner of the match, the Stank Lord!"

Brad Blood: "Stephanie's completely mortified!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord taking advantage of a cheap shot to take out Christopher Bain! He is now soaking in his victory!"

Brad Blood: "While Bain's totally in need of fresh oxygen! Someone better check if Bain's choking on his own vomit or something."

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord gets out of the ring! He's going after Stephanie Dawson!"

Brad Blood: "Looks like he is claiming his prize! Even if he hasn't beaten his lawsuit yet!"

Jim Jackson: "Stephanie running as fast as she can! But Stank Lord catching up to her!"

Brad Blood: "She throws a shoe at him!"

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord catches up to her but he's backing away!"

Brad Blood: "...what's that in her hands?"

Brad Blood: "Oh no."

Jim Jackson: "Stank Lord staring wide-eyed at the free cat! I think it's the gumbo tiramisu flavor!"

Brad Blood: "Stank Lord's...turning a bit green!"

Jim Jackson: "He's trying not to throw up! Stephanie Dawson runs away!"

A dull thud catches both announcers off-guard.

Brad Blood: "Jasmine's fainted! Um...medic!"

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:53 am

Cher's "Believe" start playing on the loud speakers as PINK lights start to flash above the entrance ramp. A light mist is released from the ground carrying the scent of lavender as the transsexual wrestler Boy Bakla leaps out from the back wearing a pink tank top and pink hot pants. It casually strolls down the entrance ramp blowing kisses to it's fans before it enters the ring with a mic in hand. The crowd looks on at Bakla not sure whether to cheer for the returning legend or to boo loudly for it's blatant attack on Raven Connoly last week.

Boy Bakla: "Good evening y'all! It's great to be back here in the wrestling ring. Now I know that many of you probably do not approve of what I did last week, in fact you've all left me mean messages on Facebook and Twitter, berating and even condemning me for my actions. Many thought I should apologize to Raven... Perhaps Raven herself is backstage right now waiting for my apology"

Boy Bakla pauses for a while as the crowd murmurs their agreement.

Boy Bakla: "Well, that's not going to happen girlfriend! I'm here tonight to make a statement. I'm here tonight to make an impact. I'm here tonight to make everyone remember who the ultimate diva is in the world of wrestling so tonight, instead of apologizing, I will beat Raven Connoly and do all that. After tonight, I shall undisputedly be the best female wrestler here in ULOL! You all may hate me now but in time you will all LOVE me!"

With that Boy Bakla drops the mic and exits the ring as the crowd begins to BOO loudly.

Boy Bakla starts to make its way up the ramp when 'Warriors Code' suddenly starts playing on the arena speakers. The crowd begins cheering loudly, after a few moments Raven Connoly walks out onto the stage with a microphone in hand. Raven skips her usual energetic entrance and instead instantly locks her eyes onto Boy Bakla, and if looks could kill, Boy Bakla would most definitely be dead.

Raven Connoly: "Let's not get to ahead of ourselves Boy Bakla, and lets not go making promises we can't keep. I can see about a thousand things wrong with what you just said, but I don't think we have time to go over them all, so I'll just hit the big ones. Let's start with last week, now you may not know this, as a matter of fact the ULOL universe may not know this either, but my track records at the ULOL PPV's has not been stellar to say the least. As a matter of fact I have lost every match I've had at the ULOL PPV's, which reflects on what I said the past few weeks about me loosing my focus, getting sloppy. So I decided to turn it around and this time around I won my match. However, before I could even have time to celebrate some...,"

Raven pauses and looks Boy Bakla up and down.

Raven Connoly: "Well, for lack of a better word lets just go with thing, hits me from behind with a baseball-bat. That was your first mistake."

Raven Connoly: "Now to my surprise this thing comes out here in front of the ULOL universe to say that they are proud of what they did and they are going to make an impact tonight. Well, good luck with that. I'm not sure what things were like the last time you were here, I'm not sure what kind of "Divas" you were used to dealing with, but things have changed my dear, gender confused friend."

Raven Connoly: "First of all, in order to be the best female wrestler in ULOL, it helps to actually be female, not some plastic surgery disaster trying to pass itself off as a female. Second, you picked the wrong girl to use as an example. I've gone up against the best in this business, men and female, and I've beat them all. I haven't seen your ring work because apparently you prefer sneak attacks with baseball bats when your opponents back is turned, but I'm pretty sure I can take you out."

Raven Connoly: "My back won't be turned to you tonight, you say you want to make an impact, well your going to be making quite a few impacts with that ring mat. You say you aren't going to apologize to me for what you did last week. Fantastic, I'd much rather beat an apology out of you tonight in front of the entire ULOL universe anyway. I can see why you attacked me, you want to make an example, you want to get noticed. Well, next time maybe you should do some research first, because you have my attention now, problem for you is you picked the wrong girl to fuck with darling. So what are we waiting for, lets do this now."

Raven drops her microphone and starts making her way down the ramp towards Boy Bakla.

Boy Bakla traipses just out of Raven's reach. It waves it's finger at Raven Connoly.

Boy Bakla: "Tsk tsk tsk... Why the rush Raven dearie, our match is still scheduled for a little later. Don't worry your pretty little ass Raven, we'll get to settle this... Or should I say I'll get to settle this. Hoohoohoohoo!"

Bakla looks straight at Raven's fuming eyes.

Boy Bakla: "Aw... Don't be angry girlfriend, you want me to apologize? Well dearie, I'm sorry that you are deluded to think that you are the best female wrestler here in ULOL. I'm sorry that you have lived under a rock that you haven't even heard of the fabulous moi. I'm sorry that for all your tough talk, it will be me walking out the victor tonight. Now is that enough apology for you?"

Bakla does not wait for Raven to answer as it swivels around flamboyantly and prances away.

Boy Bakla: "See you in the ring later girlfriend!"

Bakla disappears to the back.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

A dark alley. It's a place where he went after running away from the cops. This place is not very safe and he knows it, but he can't do anything about it. It was from his own tongue that revealed this place in one of the meetings with his old boss. He is now standing here in the place where his father was killed, this place which was once ran by his father. Felix has planned his next move, but he cannot do that until everything is in their places.

Felix Schwarz: "I admit I did it because he was a dirty cop. People hate police officers who take bribes, killing people for cartels and selling evidence like drugs and guns. Well, Michael Henderson did these things with no regrets. So that's why I took everything from him. He was destroying the reputation that our Superintendent of the Police has built during the years of running this city. That is why I decided to take everything from him. I took his life, his name, surname and even job that he was so proud about.

He couldn't believe that Police Academy would produce such people and release them into the streets. No, they do not get corrupted straight away. Everyone feels the need for money and power... But it's the cartels, the mafia that feeds on this greed and turns fresh graduates into corrupt bastards.

Felix Schwarz: "I am being the most wanted man in this place right now. Isn't that a joke that a man who tried his best to uphold justice in this world is being punished? That makes me very angry, and when I'm angry, I'm dangerous... I just have a little hope that a man who is a top dog right now is not a guy who belongs to those who have to be killed."

Felix Schwarz: "You think I do care what is going to happen to me? I do not really care about myself, but I do care about this world because everything I wish to uphold in this world is getting swallowed by the darkness. The darkness of corruption which I shall stamp out. Everybody was hoping that when Allister King took over changes will be made, but nothing happened."

Felix Schwarz: "I had doubts about joining Bold Family, but Summer Bold promised me that changes will be made, and I need to begin with Michael. I didn't know that she had her own plans for me, but now I am not scared of her anymore. I am more scared of myself for I have opened a door to my soul... Don't worry guys I am still on your side."

Although he is now most wanted man on the streets, he became next television sensation like Lindsay Lohan in rehab or Taufik kidnapping himself. How long he can sit alone and be with himself. That is what he thinks now...

Felix Schwarz: "Enough of these thoughts that fill my head with anger and loathing for what the world has become. Now has come for thoughts to end and action to begin."

He smashes a camera at the floor and that's how the scene ends.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

"Suffer Unto Me" by Avenue F begins playing throughout the arena as Alexander Conway begins walking out from the backstage of the ULOL. There is no swagger in his step, just pain from the recent Pay Per View. As he forces himself to step into the ring, a ring-hand tosses him a microphone. Before Alexander considers speaking, he leans backwards, stretching his muscles and cracking his back in the process.

Alexander Conway: "Well, well, well, kiddies, we have a variety of topics to speak about today. Obviously, I'm in pain. Good job, Shogun, you really fucked up my back in that Steel Cage match. Too bad you couldn't finish the job, huh? I guess your idea of no one man being able to defeat you wasn't 100% correct."

Alexander shrugs his shoulders with a smug look before his grabs at his back with a pained expression. He regains his composure before speaking.

Alexander Conway: "And then there is Manolo Ferrer, Zombie, and Taufik. Zombie, you are a dumbass. If you really wanted a title shot, you should have just insulted my mother."

Alexander starts moving his hands together, as if forming a shape.

Alexander Conway: "What am I doing? I'm creating a ball, a ball of kidding...."

Alexander pushes the air and imaginary ball out of his way.

Alexander Conway: "....and all kidding aside, you're still an idiot. Did your brains rot out? I had wanted you to win the ticket, which means I had accepted the thought of you challenging for my title. You should have simply asked for it. And now Taufik has the ticket, which he is going to have to use because he knows that he can't win the Primo Ultimo Championship from me in a normal match. Go figure, he's what Manolo had called me, a vagina. Although, I prefer the term cunt, because it just sounds more insulting."

Alexander forms the imaginary ball of kidding and pushes it out of his way once more.

Alexander Conway: "Again, all kidding aside, let's address Manolo. So Mr. Ferrer, you can tell when an apology is insincere, aren't you just a special little person. Honestly, when you said you wanted that match I offered a while ago, I was just too astonished to give you a reply. But here's the thing Mr. Ferrer, I have to go and get my title from Zombie, so I don't have time to play with anymore. But here, why don't you write me a note, specifying what terms you'd like and I'll get back to you after I get my title? Pick whatever terms you like, I'll probably tell you that some of them are outrageous, you'll then take them out while insulting me, and then we'll have our match. Does that sound good to you? Hmmm....I do hope so, it would be such a shame if you changed your mind."

Alexander seems to be about to shrug his shoulders again, but thinks better of it this time.

Alexander Conway: "Oops, before I forget, I need to tell Zombie when I'd like the match. Zombie, since I'm obviously not ready to fight you tonight, how does next week sound? If that isn't good for you, I'm available for anytime this month. Well, except for at the end of the month. I don't want to save our match for Pay Per View, because that's when I want to face Mr. Ferrer. Do you want to come out here and answer me now? Or should I just go?"

Alexander lowers the microphone, waiting for some sort of entrance or response from Zombie.

"All that Remains" started playing as Taufik makes his way to the ring instead of Zombie as Conway expected. Taufik stops in the middle of the ramp and we see he has a microphone in his hand, he starts talking while slowly making his way to the ring.

Taufik: "Look what we have here, it's the Primo Ultimo champion, bravo Conway. I knew that you will keep that title around the waist until I win this Ticket. I have now as I've said last Sunday, broken my losing streak and I will make sure I cash in this ticket once I gain enough momentum and when the time is right."

Taufik goes to the ring as he stares at Alexander Conway. Taufik looks to the eyes of Conway before continues to talk.

Taufik: "Tonight you are going to face my manager, someone who is already quite old in a match. Tell me Alexander, how low can you be? You are facing someone who is old and you are going to beat him to a bloody pulp. How bout facing me instead if you are man enough. Do you dare to put your title on the line without me using my ticket? If you got some balls to do that now but I am certain that you don't have any. Now since you want to talk about last Sunday's Pay-Per-View, let's talk about the PPV. You see Felix and my good buddy GoodFella successfully defended their Tag Team Championship belts without my help at all. Accept the facts Alexander, "The Age Of Pain" are better than your girls club with my or without my help at all."

Taufik pauses as he waited for Alexander Conway to reply.

Alexander waves away the air at Taufik.

Alexander Conway: "Is it just me, or did it get a bit more windy in here?"

Alexander listens to the crowd for a moment.

Alexander Conway: "Oh what? It's just an annoying twat who I don't care about? Well that isn't really worth my time is it?"

Alexander again pauses to listen to the crowd's various answers.

Alexander Conway: "Oh all right, I'll address him....but only for a little while!"

Alexander turns back to Taufik.

Alexander Conway: "Are you mentally retarded? Your manager has already accepted my match offer. I'm facing him either way. As for you getting a title shot, why should I allow you to have two? Man up and use your ticket if you want a title shot. Oh wait, that's riiight! You're a coward who will wait until after one of my matches to challenge me! I had almost forgotten! Seriously, either use your ticket now, or leave. I'm not wasting my time dealing with an ignorant moron who seemingly thinks I'm some newbie. I've been wrestling all across the world for twelve long years, I know what you're trying to pull, and I'm above it."

Alexander leans against the ring ropes, obviously bored with his waiting.

Creeping Death by Metallica plays through the arena and Zombie appears at the top of the ramp. He holds his hands up as if to embrace the loud boos coming from the crowd. He smiles and he makes his way down the ring. The crowd notice that he does not have the championship belt on him. He walks up the steps and watches the two wrestlers already in the ring. He grabs a microphone and enters the ring through the ropes. He walks around Taufik and stops to meet Alexander Conway.

Zombie: "You got your match with Manolo Ferrer tonight Conway! You better make sure your ready for it. In my experience most managers nowadays used to be professional sportsmen! You'd better be ready for anything!"

He clears his throat before carrying on.

Zombie: "I don't care when we have our match! The sooner the better! But I want you in good condition Conway! When I beat you into the ground I don't want your stupid whining in my ear afterward going, "I had my ass handed to me by Manolo Ferrer and I wasn't ready for my match with Zombie!" "

Zombie turns away from Conway and looks at Taufik.

Zombie: "Watch your step there Taufik! I'll put it on you if you injure him and I have his constant complaining in my ear!"

Zombie looks back to Conway.

Zombie: "I want you ready! And I want you in good condition! Bring it to the ring and we'll have ourselves a match!"

Zombie is interrupted by a man appearing on the giant ULOLtron at the entrance ramp.

The crowd reacts when they see it is Manolo Ferrer, the manager of the Age of Pain. He appears to be irked as he begins to speak.

Manolo Ferrer: "Ladies and gentlemen. Standing in the ring before you is the first world champion in Western civilization to have his own championship disown him, and run away. Congratulations, Mr. Conway."

Mr. Ferrer still looks like something is troubling him.

Manolo Ferrer: "So I come to ULOL, and was told as soon as I stepped in that you and I ARE going to have a match, Mr. Conway."

The fans pop in surprise. Many are excited at the prospect of seeing the Age of Pain's manager get in the ring for an actual match.

Manolo Ferrer: "It would be an understatement for me to say that I am very disappointed with this decision."

Boos are heard almost immediately. Mr. Ferrer quickly scolds the fans.

Manolo Ferrer: "How would you feel if you bought a ticket, came to this show, and was told after you found your seat that you'll be actually wrestling, instead? And you're not even wrestlers."

That only gets more boos for Mr. Ferrer.

Manolo Ferrer: "Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I am ducking this fight. But of all the people who actually WANT to be the Primo Ultimo Champion, I'm the one who gets picked to fight Mr. Conway instead. And as if it wasn't enough that I only find out about this now, I don't even get anything out of it."

The manager ignores the booing.

Manolo Ferrer: "I said I am quite happy working as a manager. It's Mr. Conway who wants a match with me, because, as he admits, he's a vagina."

Manolo Ferrer quickly corrects himself.

Manolo Ferrer: "I'll say that again. Mr. Conway wants a match with me, because, as he admits, he's a pussy."

He stresses that last word, its weight adding to the tense situation.

Manolo Ferrer: "He wants an easy match to feel better, never mind if the opponent isn't actually a wrestler. My problem now with this arrangement is that I'm no going to get properly compensated for this. What is in it for me?" Bragging rights don't mean much, and the payout I'd get for a win is not enough."

Manolo Ferrer appears to get more peeved over his situation.

Manolo Ferrer: "What's in it for me? I meant it when I said I'd take you on if it was a championship match, Mr. Conway. Unfortunately, that's now off the table, partly because the General Manager vetoed it, and partly because you don't even have a title belt to show for it. All you have left to show total strangers you're the Primo Ultimo Champion are a bunch of 8 x 10s and a few Youtube videos. So I am coming into this match at a clear disadvantage, with very little reward other than the chance to defeat a beltless World Champion. I will send you my requested match, later."

Zombie: "I want you ready! And I want you in good condition! Bring it to the ring and we'll have ourselves a match!"

The people in the audience start becoming very animated. Screams and cheers break out as they rise to their feet, but not because of the gloating fiendish horror. Everyone hysterically begins pointing to the newcomer emerging to confront the others already in the ring, clapping and cheering in ecstasy.

He is none other than the living legend of the wrestling ring. He is the idolized icon, the bearer of the Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

He is known by the name of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.

He is dressed, ready to fight, wearing his elaborate feathered mask, the Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing around his waist, and a flamethrower strapped to his back.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Hello, my lovely fans! This rotting people-eating prick will no longer be allowed to go down and eat out anyone ever again! Today, I KILL IT!"

Despite the huge stream of flame, the attack from Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing fails to hit the mark. The zombie manages to elude the attack.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "I will not let you have a sequel, you zombie! Not when my people will never have a remake of their own! Not when they will never have a 3D movie of their lives! BECAUSE YOU ATE THEM!"

Another huge whoosh of flame flies at the zombie. But he once again manages to save himself from becoming hot and crispy.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is then splashed with water, putting out his flamethrower. He sputters about, and sees Chuck Norris with a bucket.

The Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing stares in outrage and disbelief at Chuck Norris. He also sees Taufik and Alexander Conway at ringside, and Manolo Ferrer on the big screen.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You want to fight over that trinket inside that ZOMBIE'S DARKNESS! That thing is dirty with the blood of my people and my loyal fans! When I cut that undead unfriend into itty bitty pieces, that belt's going with him! You want to be champion of something, here is one! Right here!"

He taps the Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing around his waist. He then points to Conway and Ferrer.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "You two want to fight to see who is braver! How about this: YOU TWO, BRA AND PANTIES MATCH! And yes, Manolo Ferrer, I WENT THERE!"

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is very furious as he marches his way to the back. It is only after he leaves that everyone realizes he really doesn't need the mic to talk loudly.

Zombie's upper lip trembles in anger as he watches Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing leaving.

Zombie: "That's typical! Typical Q to come down here, rant and rave for all of about a minute and then pisses off back to his hidey hole! I think there is one thing in common between all of us in this ring and Mr Ferrer there on the titan tron! That we all agree that YOU are the person who causes all the havok in this company! YOU brought the manslaughter of your OWN people on yourself! YOU could have stopped those riots single-handedly but YOU encouraged them! YOU!! .... YOU!! ... sentenced your own people to the death penalty!"

Zombie paces the ring, adrenaline soaring through his body. He goes to hit Alexander Conway but restrains himself and literally pulls his fist back to his side. He takes a moment to compose himself and carries on.

Zombie: "Let's think about this Q! What friends do you have here? What belt did you make up just to big yourself up? The only people that for some reason like you, is your own. So the way I see it now, I took your people away from you and now they are a part of ME! My minions inside of me! Crawling around on their hands and knees praying to the lord each day for freedom! YOUR friends!! YOUR people!! And now ... you've taken away Marcus Troy from me!"

His face still full of anger and hatred as he looks deep into the camera. A sly grin appears across his face and his voice this time more sinister than before.

Zombie: "And the closest thing you have to a friend now ... is me!!"

Zombie continues to look deep into the camera trying to reach his only friend.

Manolo Ferrer happens to still be on the ULOL Tron the whole time Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing was on his rampage. He tentatively decides to speak up after Zombie throws out his accusations.

Manolo Ferrer: "No, I never blamed Q for what happened to those poor people. You're not dragging me into this. I'd rather not have him come after me, or my clients, with a flamethrower."

Other than that, the manager of the Age of Pain clearly is at a loss on what he is going to say.

Manolo Ferrer: "What the hell then. What have I got to lose. Bra and panties match, Mr. Conway. I'm sure you can find undies that fit your vagina."

Manolo Ferrer hastily kills the video feed. Static fills the ULOL Tron flickers as he goes off the air.

Alexander shakes his head in a mixture of disappointment and disbelief.

Alexander Conway: "What a bunch of lunatics....."

Alexander looks up towards the now black ULOL Tron.

Alexander Conway: "Looks like some old man is having memory problems....he told me he wanted the match at the PPV, and now he's bitching about it? I wasn't even told until just now that I was already having the match with him. What's more, that old fart let Q goad him into making it a bra and panties match....he may want to fulfill some sick fantasy of rolling around on the mat stripping another guy down, but I really don't swing that way. If I hadn't offered him control of the terms, I would be talking to Eunice about this right now."

Alexander again shakes his head, displeased with the idea of dressing in woman's clothing. Before long, he navigates his way around the other members of the locker room and heads up the ramp and back to the backstage of the ULOL.

The costumed champion of the wrestling world known only as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing storms out of the building. He still carries the flamethrower he tried using on the zombie. He paces about angrily in front of the entrance, even as reporters gather around him, waiting for him to make a statement.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "The abhorrent monster talks the nonsense of a brain that's dead and rotting! Why does a zombie want to compete to be a wrestling champion, I have no idea! Conway, Ferrer and Primo want that title belt, but all I want to do is melt it into slag! And you with it! I will exert every effort to see you don't get your own action figure, your own T-shirt, your own DVD and a part in the ULOL video game! Ray Kamaura may only want to see your raisin balls, but I want to chop them off and make you eat them! And that is the least of what I plan to do! But I will do it, because I have divine justice on my side!"

The Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing starts to walk to his gold SUV. The media follow.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "Since that zombie is fighting the FAKE MONSTER next week, I will give you two notice right now! I WILL BE THERE! And it's not because I want a McSatan's double cheeseburger!"

The Correa Grande Del Oro De Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing points to the title belt around his waist, before the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The larger than life wrestler also known as The Morbidly Obese Man sits inside the Morbidly Unstoppable locker room. He gargles a whole bottle of Listerine and spits out the content into a pail. He looks at his partner "Unstoppable" Jack Johnson and begins to speak.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Man, that was NASTY!!! That Free Cat Challenge blows! They could at least have taken out all the cat hair before they let us eat them cats. I think I'll be coughing up hairballs for a month. HUARGH!"

The Morbidly Obese Man spits out a huge hairball. He wipes his mouth and his expression gets serious.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "I told you Brostar is a big liability. He lost his match even after you helped him. I mean seriously... He blew it again and now he's going after Taufik and the Boleto Dorado title. Are you sure you want to stick by him? He may be more trouble than he's worth..."

The big man looks at his partner waiting for confirmation.

UJJ chokes a bit before coughing up a furball. He spits on the floor before replying.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson: "Listen, it's ok. I expected him to win as well, but you didn't win a match that you should have won. Eating is your thing."

UJJ wipes his mouth of any hair.

"Unstoppable" Jack Johnson:"But, whilst it should be us with that ticket, we should help him. He is one of us now. Come on now Lardie, we all have to the be new at some point. Come on let's go give our, 'appreciation.'"

UJJ walks out of the door and opens it, gesturing his partner to follow.

The Morbidly Obese Man: "Whoa whoa whoa there! One of us? Since when? I haven't even fully accepted him yet and you already accepted him with open arms? I'm sorry Johnson but I still have to be convinced that Brostar is someone reliable."

The big man steps back and mulls over it...

The Morbidly Obese Man: "I think we should just observe what he does for now Johnson. No need to give ourselves extra grief."

The Morbidly Obese Man exits the room along with his partner as the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jim Jackson: "The upcoming match is a bout between Raven Connoly and the returning Boy Bakla. During our PPV last week, Bakla made a surprise return to the squared circle and attacked Raven Connoly in the process."

Brad Blood: "Dammit, I thought we were rid of that fruitcake. Why is he back again?"

Jim Jackson: "But weren't you and Bakla an item once Brad? I remember the company Christmas party in the supplies closet where..."

Brad Blood: "I WAS DRUNK! IT WAS DARK AND IT HAD BOOBS!!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Boy Bakla!"

Cher's "Believe" start playing on the loud speakers as PINK lights start to flash above the entrance ramp. A light mist is released from the ground carrying the scent of lavender as the transsexual wrestler Boy Bakla leaps out from the back wearing a pink tank top and pink hot pants. It casually strolls down the entrance ramp blowing kisses to it's fans before it enters the ring with flourish and heads to it's corner waiting for the match to begin.

Jim Jackson: "Bakla looks to be in top form, but remember Bakla has been away from the ring for over a year now. We may see some ring rust. Bakla's attack on Raven last week was totally uncalled for."

Brad Blood: "That freak should lose! I'm betting on Raven on this one. Co'z I'm straight! Yeah! I'm a healthy heterosexual male!"

Jasmine Lee: "Introducing next, it's opponent, Raven Connoly!"

"Warriors Code" By The Dropkick Murphy's starts to play throughout the arena. Raven runs out onto the stage, she throws her fist in the air and screams as a barrage of fireworks go off behind her.

Jim Jackson: "Raven looks like she's concentrated on doing one thing tonight, and that's to put Bakla in it's place."

Brad Blood: "Well getting attacked by a bat does that to you. Bakla may have just awoken a sleeping dragon."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for the match is Jack B. Nimble. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Raven lunges straight at Bakla. The faster Raven takes Bakla by surprise and already has a waistlock on. Rolling German suplexes by Raven right off the bat!"

Brad Blood: "One! Two! Three! THREE GERMAN SUPLEXES! Bakla didn't know what hit it! Raven for the pin."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Bakla kicks out but Raven is already on the move! Second rope splash by Raven. Boy Bakla gets Irish whipped into the corner by Raven, who charges in with a clothesline."

Brad Blood: "Oh! Raven just drove into Bakla! Bakla falls straight down into the mat. Raven hooks the leg..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Again Bakla kicks out at two. Raven picks Bakla up... Bakla pulls at Raven's pigtails! The ref gives a warning to Bakla. Raven throws a big right. Bakla ducks and takes her down with a leg trip."

Brad Blood: "Bakla quickly applies a crossface! Oh no! Raven is caught in Bakla's grasp! Raven tries and reaches for the ropes... She makes it! That fruitcake is not letting go!"

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three! Four..."

Jim Jackson: "Bakla finally lets go after nearly getting disqualified but that damage may have been done to Raven. Bakla with an Irish whip sends Raven to the ropes. Raven ducks under a clothesline and bounces back... Raven takes Bakla down with a shoulder block."

Brad Blood: "Raven quickly locks in a figure four leglock! Wait! Bakla flips it over and now it's Raven in pain... No! Raven flips over again! The pressure is back on Bakla's legs!"

Jim Jackson: "Bakla is screaming in pain! Bakla tries to get to the ropes and makes it! Raven releases her hold, unlike Bakla... Raven gets a hammerlock on Bakla but Bakla reverses it. Raven counters it by sending Bakla to the ropes."

Brad Blood: "Stiff lariat by Raven takes Bakla down! Raven for a legdrop... Bakla rolls away! Damn!"

Jim Jackson: "Bakla with an eye poke on Raven when just out of the referee's line of sight! Bakla hits a body slam on Raven. Bakla grabs Raven's arm and locks in an armbar! Raven quickly grabs the bottom rope with her free arm! Again Bakla still holds on."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two! Three! Four..."

Brad Blood: "Stupid fairy! Not playing fair! Raven is now favoring her shoulder."

Jim Jackson: "Bakla stomps away at Raven's shoulder while she's still down! Bakla is working on Raven's shoulder... Bakla picks Raven up... DDT! Bakla rolls Raven up..."

Jack B. Nimble: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Wait the referee sees Bakla's legs on the middle rope using it as leverage. He stops the three count. Bakla is not happy... Bakla just slapped the referee!"

Jim Jackson: "Bad move! The referee is calling for the bell! He just DQed Bakla!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match as a result of a disqualification, Raven Connoly!"

Brad Blood: "Bakla just went ballistic and is attacking the referee... And not in a sexual way!"

Jim Jackson: "Raven stops Bakla from hurting the referee any further! Bakla tries to go for her throat. Raven dodges Bakla! Raven Connoly bounces off the ropes and runs towards Boy Bakla lifts her leg and kicks Boy Bakla in the jaw with the heel of her shoes executing a devastating Bloody Sunday! Bakla is laid out in the ring as Raven helps the ref back to his feet."

Brad Blood: "We'll have one grumpy fairy when it wakes up..."

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:53 am

The arena lights turn purple and start to flicker. "Kill Everybody by SKRILLEX" blasts through the arena speakers as the arena fills with purple smoke. Purple and white spotlights scatter around the arena and then shines on and follow Lucian Blackheart as he makes his way to the ring posing and interacting with the fans.

Lucian Blackheart: "Ladies and gentlemen, once again I have proven to be a pure dominant force in the ULOL. Nao Fook Mi on the other hand.. Not so much. After losing her chance at a then vacant Ligero Maximo title, then a failed attempt to capture the Ligero Maximo title. You had your own title, yet you stupidly tried to take mine away from me at the cost of your own. Scoreboard? 3 - 0."

Lucian pauses for a brief moment as mixed reactions come from the crowd. A devilish smirk appears on Lucian's face, at the conflict of the fans.

Lucian Blackheart: "It'll never happen, and when I am defeated and dethroned, it will not be by your hand.. Or that of your midget friend, who I suppose believes has a score to settle with me. But I hereby deem you unworthy. While yes, you did appear at the PPV, it was also in a dark match which you failed to capitalize. You're a pest, but obviously one that is not worth my time.

A grin appears on Lucian's face. Then in a blink of the eye returns to the devilish smirk previously displayed on his face.

Lucian Blackheart: "Only by one truly worthy of this title will take it from me. Unfortunately, that currently does not exist in this federation, and I'm completely okay with that to be honest. Where as it does get tiresome continually being challenged by incompetent idiots. Fools who actually believe they have a chance at beating me. Truly pathetic.

An angered look appears on Lucian's face and body language.

Lucian Blackheart: "No more freebies! From now on I will not be accepting your petty little challenges. You want my title, you either earn it or you take your pathetic case up with management. If I believe your worthy of my title, I may even challenge you myself. Do keep that in mind. Until then.. I'll be watching.

Purple smoke is released, clouding the arena. By the time it clears Lucian Blackheart is nowhere to be seen.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The scene opens backstage where Nao Fook Mi and Little Wang who is standing on top of a step ladder is seen beside Stephanie Dawson. Stephanie signals the cameraman as she begins the interview with ULOL's only mixed tag team, Oriental Spices.

Stephanie Dawson: "Welcome ladies and gentlemen, we are fortunate tonight to be able to talk to one of ULOL's more famous tag teams, Oriental Spices. Good evening Miss Nao, Little Wang, let's get right into the questions shall we? Tonight you will be facing The DWMA, a team which have beaten you the last time you faced each other. Won't we see a repeat of what happened last time?"

Nao Fook Mi takes the mic and replies to Stephanie's question.

Nao Fook Mi: "Yes, it is true we lost the last time we battled. I will not make excuses for it. But be assured that this time the end result will be different. This time Oriental Spices shall be the team that walks out the victor. We made a few mistakes the last time we faced each other, mistakes which cost us dearly but this time, we don't plan on repeating those mistakes. We learn and we get better."

Stephanie nods and continues on to the next question.

Stephanie Dawson: "You and Little Wang though have been on a losing streak lately, even though you are full of confidence right now, it would seem you both are the underdogs here. Lucian Blackheart even pointed it out earlier."

Fook Mi again grabs the mic to reply.

Nao Fook Mi: "Lucian Blackheart can talk all he wants, the facts are he couldn't have won his matches fair and square. I lost my match with him and even though he had to cheat to win, the bottom line is I still lost. I won't throw the blame to his cheating ways even though I should, I knew what he is like and I should have already anticipated his dirty tactics. He says I should prove myself again if he is to face me, then do that I shall, the next time we meet, I will come out victorious."

Fook Mi pauses to catch her breath before continuing.

Nao Fook Mi: "Losing is part of life, I am only human and I cannot always win. As the cliche goes what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. The losses me and Little Wang acquired showed us our weak points, weak points which we have slowly been training to negate. Tonight, you will see a different Oriental Spices in the ring."

Little Wang then tugs on Nao Fook Mi's cheongsam indicating he also wants some mic time. Nao Fook Mi passes the mic to her partner.

The camera adjusts to get Little Wang in frame just as he begins to speak.

Little Wang: "It is true that we have lost many fights, yet who do you think are the fans supporting in this fight? Definitely not The DWMA. Did the fans cheer for Lucian Blackheart when Fook Mi and I fought him? No. The fans cheered for us and has always shown their support for us, win or lose, they have stuck by us. It is time I think to make sure we do not disappoint our fans further."

Little Wang then motions for the camera to move closer.

Little Wang: "To everyone watching tonight, when the referee counts one, two, three... You can be sure the ones standing in the ring celebrating victory will not be The DWMA but us, Oriental Spices. And to Lucian Blackheart, don't get too comfortable with that title, you won't always be top dog... You may be on top right now but that only means one thing, the only place for you to go from here on in is DOWN! As for us, the only place for us to go from here on in is UP!"

The camera zooms out again as Little Wang finishes and returns the mic to Stephanie.

Stephanie Dawson: "Well you heard them folks, despite suffering back to back losses, the determination and spirit of Nao Fook Mi and Little Wang still burns brightly. And that concludes this interview. Back to you guys in the booth!"

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

We see the crowd looking at an empty ring. In this crowd we see some Grey Skull signs. Apparently the fans know about his arrival here at ULOL.

"One" from Metallica blast trough the speakers. Sparks are showering as John "Grey Skull" Johnson makes his way to the ring, wearing shorts. When he hits the ring the thunder hits the ring posts.

John "Grey Skull" Johnson: "Finally I have arrived here at ULOL. Let me introduce my self. My name is John "Grey Skull" Johnson. I'm here to make my dreams come true. And of course to entertain you peeps."

The crowd starts to cheer.

John "Grey Skull" Johnson: "All right settle down. I just got here. I've been told that my first fight will be on April 10 against The Masked Man. I have no idea who that joker is but I can tell you one thing. I'm here to make an impact. On the 10th I'll show you all what I can. So with this being said I'll leave you all here and start training for my 1st match."

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Ray walks into the DWMA locker room, wearing a pair of blue faded jeans and a polo shirt that had the words "Ask me about my Zombie Plan!" and a illustration of shotgun on it, and to his surprise he fines Leon Hinomoto sitting on a chair watching his DVD collection of Dragon Ball Z. Ray notices that they had the same, zombie hating, shirt on.

Ray Kamaura: "Holy crap you're back!?! You do know that we have a match tonight, right? Maybe I'll get to punt that midget dude again. That was fun! Anyway I think you should be getting ready.

Ray threw Leon his bag.

Ray Kamaura: "So how was vacation?"

Leon uses the remote to turn off the TV. He grabs his bag and quickly changes into his gear. Leon looks at Ray and decides to put the shirt back on over his gear.

Leon Hinomoto: "It was a well needed rest and I'm glad I went. It's just to bad that we don't yet hold gold. Ha that rhymed. But Anyway Tonight lets send a message to the Age of Pansy."

Leon looks back to Ray, who is now in his gear, putting the shirt back on. Leon grabs some tape and begins to wrap his ankles for support.

Leon Hinomoto: "Let's try not to let anything stop us from winning our match."

Ray chuckles as Leon throws him the tape.

Ray Kamaura: "I don't think we need to worry about anything bad happening, but let's be on the lookout just in case. I'm not sure if Alexander Conway will be out at ringside or not, considering that he has a match too. Just remember tag often and keep wearing down the enemy. Never let up."

Ray looks around the room and decides to sit down and take a nice drink of water.

Leon fell to the ground and started to do a pre-match warm up that consists of 100 push-ups. He keeps talking.

Leon Hinomoto: "I did defeat the IRA in our last match. 'GRUNT' If we keep up at this pace will should have no problem the next time we meet the Tag team chumps. 'GRUNT' I feel like i could be sleeping and beat them. 'GRUNT'"

Leon finishes his push-ups and the turns on the TV.

Ray walks over and slaps the back of Leon's head.

Ray Kamaura: Turn that off man we got a match coming up.

Leon turns the TV off, with great reluctance, and stands up. Ray and Leon walk out the door and the scene fades to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

&

VS

&

Jim Jackson: "And now for some tag action. Oriental Spices will be taking on The DWMA the last time these two teams met Oriental Spices lost that battle..."

Brad Blood: "That midget Wang got punted out so far into the audience, it became a two on one handicap. I wanna see Kamaura punt Wang again!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a tag team match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, the team of Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi, Oriental Spices!"

Oriental music starts playing on the background as smoke covers the mouth of the entrance tunnel. Suddenly out leaps Nao Fook Mi wearing a short cheongsam. Little Wang pops up from in between her legs. They quickly makes their way down entrance ramp and enters the ring. They bow and give their respect to the crowd before heading to their corner.

Jasmine Lee: "And their opponents for the evening, the team of Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura, The DWMA!"

The lights go out and a laser show starts when "Corroded Dreams" by Ride The Sky starts blast in the arena. After 25 seconds Ray Kamaura and Leon walk slowly to the start of the ramp. Both superstars stop and the lights turn back on after lightning strikes behind them. The lasers continue as Ray and Leon slowly enter the ring. They go to different ring posts and climb them, then strike a pose. Ray and Leon move to the same side of the ring and wait for their challengers.

Jim Jackson: "All four wrestlers are in the ring. It looks like Wang is convincing Fook Mi that he should go first."

Brad Blood: "Well Leon Hinomoto is already waiting in the ring, I guess he's the one starting off for The DWMA which I still have no idea what it means."

In a flash of smoke and light, the metaphysical masked wonder named Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing appears beside Brad Blood! He quickly grabs a mic and screams unto it.

Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing: "The Dangling Weenies Marinated Asses!"

And just as he entered, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing disappears in a cloud of smoke and light!

Brad Blood: "Cough... Cough... I guess I should have expected that coming..."

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for the match is Don Q. Hotte. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell! Little Wang runs between Leon Hinomoto's legsm he leaps on ropes... He catches Rainman on the head... DDT! Leon Hinomoto gets back up staggering... Spinning bulldog in the corner, Rainman is down."

Brad Blood: "Little Wang goes for the cover early in the match!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "The match continues. Tag between Little Wang and Nao Fook Mi. Leon Hinomoto is slammed to the corner and both members of Oriental Spices throw in some strikes, Fook Mi to Leon Hinomoto's head while Wang goes for the shin. Good double team."

Brad Blood: "Wang finally exits to the apron. Fook Mi tries to lift Leon Hinomoto up... Rainman escapes and drops down behind her! He picks Fook Mi up... This time Fook Mi escapes and drops behind Rainman! Talk about countering the counter!"

Jim Jackson: "Nao Fook Mi hits a rolling kick on Rainman. Rainman staggers back to the ropes and bounces back... Right into an enziguri! Fook Mi hooks the leg."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Leon Hinomoto kicks out at two! He fights his way back up to his feet... Fook Mi with a chop that echoes throughout the arena! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! That left a big mark."

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi lifts her arm for a Mongolian chop... Rainman kicks Nao Fook Mi in the gut to reverse the momentum. Springboard blockbuster!"

Brad Blood: "Leon Hinomoto pulls that one out of his ass! Tag between Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura and the big man is in the ring!"

Jim Jackson: "Bodyslam by Kamaura shakes the ring! Fook Mi staggers to her feet... Irish whip by Kamaura sends Fook Mi to the ropes! Big clothesline from Kamaura!"

Brad Blood: "Oh! The impact on Fook Mi's chest may just have reduced her cup size! Kamaura for the pin."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Jim Jackson: "Fook Mi manages to get a shoulder up! Kamaura picks Fook Mi up and sends her again to the ropes with an Irish whip... Ray Kamaura misses a clothesline! Nao Fook Mi quickly lunges to her corner! Tag between Nao Fook Mi and Little Wang."

Brad Blood: "The midget runs around as Ray Kamaura tries to stomp on him! Little Wang trips! Kamaura with a wide grin... HE PUNTS WANG!!! WAIT! THIS TIME WANG SOMEHOW CHANGES TRAJECTORY IN MID-AIR AND LANDS ON THE ROPES!"

Jim Jackson: "Springboard dropkick right on Kamaura's face! Kamaura staggers back! Little Wang with a springboard spinning bulldog from the corner... The momentum plants Kamaura on the mat! Diving headbutt from Wang... Bulls eye! Wang for the cover!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two..."

Brad Blood: "Kamaura shoves the midget off of him so hard, Wang just flew over the top rope! Wait! Wang hangs onto the top rope and lands on the ring apron!"

Jim Jackson: "Kamaura gets up... He walks into a springboard dropkick from Little Wang! Kamaura staggers back... Little Wang kicks Kamaura on the shin! Kamaura furious tries to catch the little man."

Brad Blood: "Little Wang again with a springboard off the ropes lands on Kamaura's back! Kamaura rams his back into the turnbuckles! Wang just got flattened!"

Jim Jackson: "Ray Kamaura hits a bulldog off the ropes. Little Wang is lifeless on the canvas... KAMAURA BEGINS STOMPING AWAY ON LITTLE WANG!"

Brad Blood: "Wang will be but a smear on Kamaura's boots! Kamaura for the pin."

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Thre..."

Jim Jackson: "Unbelievable! Wang gets a shoulder up! The crowd cannot believe it... Kamaura cannot believe it! Even the ref is dumbstruck! Kamaura picks up Wang."

Brad Blood: "Kamaura brings Wang to their corner. He tags in Leon Hinomoto. Rainman lays a few kicks to Little Wang's midsection. Wang is hardly moving at all... Just the occasional twitch here and there."

Jim Jackson: "Leon Hinomoto picks Little Wang up... Sidewalk slam! Leon Hinomoto climbs up to the top rope... He leaps..."

Brad Blood: "WANG ROLLS AWAY AT THE LAST POSSIBLE SECOND! Leon Hinomoto hits nothing! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Both men are down... The crowd is cheering for Little Wang..."

Jim Jackson: "Wang is slowly crawling to their corner... Fook Mi has her arm out... Wang tries to get a tag... Rainman regains his bearings and tries to catch up to Wang... Rainman grabs Wang just as he's inches from Fook Mi!"

Brad Blood: "Leon Hinomoto drags Wang back and clutches on Wang tightly! He lifts Wang up going for a body slam... WANG COUNTERS AND TURNS IT INTO A HURRICANRANA!"

Jim Jackson: "Wang leaps towards Fook Mi's hand... He gets a tag! The crowd explodes into cheers as Fook Mi enters the ring! Nao Fook Mi Irish whips her opponent to the ropes, as her opponent bounces back she goes down on all fours and Little Wang uses her back to springboard and hit a dropkick to the opponent's face, as the opponent falls, Nao Fook Mi executes a standing shooting star press executing a Five Star Spice!"

Brad Blood: "Oriental Spices hit their finisher on Leon Hinomoto! Fook Mi goes for the pin! Kamaura rushes into the ring... LITTLE WANG SPRINGBOARDS OFF THE ROPES AND CLAMPS ONTO KAMAURA'S FACE!!! Kamuara stumbles around trying to pry Wang off his face!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Thre...!"

Jim Jackson: "Leon Hinomoto gets a leg up on the bottom rope on the last possible millisecond! Kamaura finally pries Little Wang off his face, he throws Wang at Fook Mi who catches her partner... STIFF CLOTHESLINE BY KAMAURA TAKES BOTH FOOK MI AND WANG DOWN! Leon is back up again... Leon Hinomoto superkicks Nao Fook Mi back onto Ray Kamaura's shoulders. Ray Kamuara holds the stunned opponent while Leon Hinomoto climbs to the top turnbuckle. Leon Hinomoto leaps off and double stomps Nao Fook Mi's head before Ray drops him with a Death Valley Driver executing The Final Rain! Rainman for the pin!"

Don Q. Hotte: "One! Two! Three!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match via pinfall, the team of Leon Hinomoto and Ray Kamaura, The DWMA!"

Jim Jackson: "Oriental Spices almost pulled an upset but still fell short tonight."

Brad Blood: "Well luckily for The DWMA they didn't lose, imagine losing to a girl and a midget."

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:54 am

Have you always wanted a pet but cannot afford one?

Have you always wanted a pet but is afraid that it'll destroy the furniture?

Have you always wanted a pet but do not have the time to feed and walk it?

WELL TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY!

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Freeca10

HERE AT FREE CAT INC. WE WILL SOLVE ALL THOSE PESKY LITTLE ISSUES YOU HAVE! OWN A PET NOW HASSLE FREE! NO NEED TO FEED IT, NO NEED TO WALK IT! NO NEED TO WORRY ABOUT ANYTHING! SO CALL NOW AT 1-800-FREE-CAT! AND WE'LL DELIVER YOUR VERY OWN FREE CAT RIGHT TO YOUR DOORSTEP FOR FREE!!!

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The scene started with Taufik walking around the empty arena that soon are going to filled to capacity. In a couple of hours they are going to wrestle to their heart's content. After walking a few rounds, he sits down to the chair and looks on at the ring in the audience view and then a memory start to play again in his mind. Taufik was in a Wrestling school and he was in that school for a three months, and that day was a special day as a mystery superstar is showing up to the training school. The trainer was pacing around his student which includes Taufik then the coach started talking.

Coach: "Today is a very good day and you guys know why?"

The students including Taufik were confused as they didn't know what is their coach were talking about as the coach continues to talk.

Coach: "Because today is going to be an interesting lesson as today we are learning the arts of Hardcore Wrestling. Today I called a very special person to come over and teach you guys and he will be here for a couple of weeks and here he is right now."

A Wrestler is walking into the training ground and it got a lot of people excited as it was a well known Hardcore Wrestler of all time. As the wrestler was beside the coach, the wrestler started talking.

Tommy Dreamer: "Hello there everybody. As some of you people may not know me, My name is Tommy Dreamer and I am from the Original ECW and some of you may know me being called The Innovator Of Violence. I was brought here by your coach today to teach you how do my favorite form of wrestling style and that is hardcore wrestling."

Tommy Dreamer starts to train each and every wrestler one by one. Obviously all of them were not doing well as it was their first time but when it came to Taufik's turn to be trained by Tommy Dreamer, Tommy addressed the young wrestler.

Tommy Dreamer: "Taufik, now is your turn. Alright right now I need to ask you something. Taufik, what is the weapon that you had in mind?"

Taufik thought about it as most of the student mostly think of Chairs, Baseball Bat, Trash Cans, Stops Sign. Taufik can't think straight because there so many weapon in mind but one Weapon stood out from the rest as there was a flashback when Taufik got struck by a Singapore Cane that his friend use against him during that sparring session when he was in his mid-teens. Once he finishes thinking of the weapon, Taufik replied to Tommy Dreamer

Taufik: "Mr. Dreamer, I would like to use one of your favorite weapon and that is the Singapore Cane."

Tommy Dreamer nodded his head as he is agrees to Taufik's choice of using a Singapore Cane as his weapon. Tommy Dreamer then instructs Taufik to do the following.

Tommy Dreamer: "Taufik, let's do some light sparring with the Singapore Cane, hit me as Hard as you can and I will strike you as hard as well just like what I did to your mates. When I say go you will start. You understand that?"

Taufik nodded his head as he awaits for Tommy Dreamer to say go and once he got the go Taufik struck first but Tommy ducked it and they use the Singapore Cane as if they were having a sword fight, but a mistake that Taufik made cost him to trip and Tommy Dreamer struck Taufik with it and Taufik goes down and quickly rise up to Dreamer surprise. Tommy keeps on striking on Taufik, Taufik is not retaliating but only shows that it doesn't hurt him. Finally Taufik decides that he is going to strike once again but Tommy ended up strike Taufik to the head and that brought Taufik down but just then Taufik rose up again. Taufik's coach blew the whistle as the session is over. Dreamer to his surprise is impressed by Taufik seemingly immunity to the Singapore Cane that he talked to the young wrestler again.

Tommy Dreamer: "Woah Taufik, that was sick man how are you immune to the strikes that Singapore Cane I gave you. Doesn't it hurt? I know about blood rushing to your brain but that was just sick. Are you using painkillers or something?"

Taufik: "Well nope and to the matter of fact, I didn't know what weapon to use but the reason I decided to use the Singapore Cane is due to the fact that when I was fifteen, I fought with my friend and I was to come up with an upset another friend of mine passed him the Cane and strike me down."

Both Taufik and Dreamer continue to talk till Taufik memories start to fade away as he is still looking on to the ring and as he knew that the door is about to open, he went to the backstage area and go and gear up for tonight event as the scene fade to black.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

The huge crowd of protesters based across the street from the I.N. Sane Arena break out into loud and wild celebratory cries, as they see several people hauling a porta-potty, chained up and weighed down with anvils and other heavy objects. They gather around the portable toilet, wielding their pitchforks, baseball bats and whatever items they can use to bash someone's head in.

News helicopters fly overhead, as the world's reporters try to get a good view of the action unfolding before their very eyes. At least one news team has already managed to get themselves into a good position, standing just a few feet from the heavily chained porta-potty.

Reporter: "Just earlier tonight, we saw the world-famous wrestler named Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing challenge and defeat ULOL official Marcus Troy in a brutal match. After his victory, Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's fellow countrymen have taken it upon themselves to take Marcus Troy to this protest camp, set up just across the street from the ULOL venue. Troy was the former General Manager of the ULOL, and under his regime a large number of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's countrymen were killed by one of the performers hired by Marcus Troy. They've placed the blame squarely on Troy for the tragedy, and it's pretty clear that they intend to see that Marcus Troy is made to account for what has happened to their kin."

The mob unlock the chains that are wrapped around the porta-let. The stench of crap and piss greet them when they open the porta-potty, along with the soaking wet, crumpled mass that is Marcus Troy. He tumbles out of the porta-let, weakly whimpering as a trail of blood streams down between his legs.

A fire hydrant rolls out, and Marcus screams as it crushes his leg.

Protester: [There's that sick sonovabitch!]

Protester 2: [My sister's dead because of you, you bastard!]

Protestor: [Kill him!]

The former General Manager is roughly dragged to his feet, to be pelted by rotten fruit, dirty underwear and bits of rock.

Protester 3: [We can't kill him! He has to pay for what he's done!]

The crowd is angrily split over the woman's sentiments. Many want justice delivered right on the spot.

Protester 3: [We gotta bring him back home, so we can hang him high!]

Marcus Troy groggily hears the mob yelling and shouting, Many threaten to prod him with their sharpened spears and machetes.

Marcus Troy: "Hey! Hey listen! We can talk this over! Can we make a deal here?!"

A flying tomato bonks him square in the face.

Protestor 4: [You wanna make a deal now! What the fuck are you gonna give us? Free tickets!? Are they gonna bring back the people that fucking zombie of yours killed!?!?! We don't want anything to do with you! We want justice! And we're gonna get it!]

Marcus Troy: "Hey! Don't be too hasty! I think if we just calmed down for a few minutes, we can--"

A flying potato hits him square in the mouth.

Protestor: [You think we're gonna fall for this!? What are you gonna say that's gonna change our minds, Troy!]

Marcus Troy is manhandled as they slap heavy chains on his hands and legs.

Marcus Troy: "I can cut a deal! Whatever you want, I can--"

Protestor 2: [You deserve to DIE, and I hope you burn in HELL!]

Marcus Troy: "Hey--"

One of the protestors yells in his face.

Protestor 5: "ENGLISH, MUTHAFUCKA! WE DON'T SPEAK IT!"

The ex-General Manager is slapped hard across the face.

Protestor 5: [Take this muthafuckin' snake to the muthafuckin' plane!]

Marcus Troy: "HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALP! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALP!"

The reporters covering the scene are crowded out by the protestors from Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing's homeland, as they drag Marcus Troy away.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

VS

Jim Jackson: "Before we start, ULOL would like to release the following statement, the wrestler Brostar has breached his contract and has returned to his homeland Australia. Doing so has made him blacklisted from the fed and his name shall be erased from the ULOL roster."

Brad Blood: "Man what a douche... Just packing up and leaving like that just because he can't wrestle and cut a good promo... Well good riddance."

ULOL intern and gopher Bob Bobbie comes out, with a clipboard in hand. He clears his throat before talking into the mic in his hand.

Bob Bobbie: "Hi. The GM asked me to come out here and make an announcement for our big match of the Primo Ultimo Champion, Alexander Conway vs Manolo Ferrer. So, they'll be fighting in a bra and panties match."

Bob takes a moment to read what's on his clipboard.

Bob Bobbie: "GM Allister King's also decided that, aside from being a bra and panties match, the loser will have to join the winner's group. So if the Primo Ultimo Champion, Mr. Conway, beats Mr. Manolo Ferrer, Manolo's gonna have to join Mr. Conway's team, and be their manager. If Manolo Ferrer beats Alexander Conway, Conway is going to have to join the Age of Pain, and become Manolo Ferrer's client."

Brad Blood: "That's...big news. Crap, there's suddenly a lot riding on this match."

Jim Jackson: "Do Ferrer or Conway even suspected this could happen? The power struggle between the Age of Pain and the DWMA would be turned on its ear by this one match."

Brad Blood: "Manolo Ferrer was looking for Conway to put something on the line. Looks like the General Manager's done just that. But Mr. Ferrer's got something important on the line, too."

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a *giggle* bras and panties match! Introducing first, he is the current and reigning ULOL Primo Ultimo Champion, Alexander Conway!"

"Suffer Unto Me" by Avenue F blares throughtout the arena as Alexander Conway steps out from the backstage of the ULOL. He looks over the booing audience before he walks down to the ring in drag.

Jim Jackson: "I-I can't believe they really went through with this..."

Brad Blood: "I know! Seriously though why is there a sudden resurgence of cross-dressing when Bakla makes a return."

Jasmine Lee: "And his opponent for the night, Manolo Ferrer!"

The lights dim as A MANOLO FERRER PRODUCTION appears on the giant video screen. a bombastic orchestral arrangement by Danny Elfman begins to play, as various shots of a well-coifed flash on the screen. We see he is always leading The Age of Pain down the ring while they hold the ULOL Campeónes Compañero titles over their head. Manolo Ferrer is also in drag.

Brad Blood: "Agh! My eyes! What a horrible horrible sight. Manolo in drag!"

Jim Jackson: "It could be worse, it could be The Morbidly Obese Man in drag."

Brad Blood: "Good point... DAMN YOU JIM! Now I can't get that image of TMOM in drag out of my head!"

Jasmine Lee: "The referee for this match is Don Q. Hotte. LET THE LUNACY BEGIN!"

Jim Jackson: "And there's the bell... Hmm... Here listed in Manolo Ferrer's background is that he took up Jeet Kune Do under Dan Inosanto, Bruce Lee's pupil... Uh-oh... Conway may not be aware of thi... Too late... Manolo Ferrer is in a southpaw stance hits Conway with a series of quick jabs."

Brad Blood: "Oh man, did you see thsoe fists fly? I can't believe the speed of Ferrer's jabs. They are keeping Conway at a safe distance."

Jim Jackson: "Conway lunges in but Ferrer with a quick side step throws in a couple of leg kicks at Conway's shin. Oh! Nice side kick by Manolo takes Conway by surprise. It is clear that Conway's injury from the pay-per-view is still bothering him. He is definitely not in top form tonight."

Brad Blood: "Conway didn't expect too that Manolo can move that fast. But that's what Jeet Kune Do is, the way of the intercepting fist. Wait Taufik tries to jump up to the ring apron. The ref sees him and tries to stop him from entering..."

Jim Jackson: "GoodFella & Schwarz leap unto the other side of the ring apron, they plan to jump Conway while Taufik distracts the ref! NO! The DWMA just leapt over the steel railings from the front row and attacks GoodFella & Schwarz!"

Brad Blood: "Looks like Manolo Ferrer fails there... Conway finally gets his hands on Manolo Ferrer..."

Jim Jackson: "Atomic drop! Alexander Conway ducks a clothesline attempt. Hard back suplex on Ferrer. Spinning bulldog in the corner, Ferrer is down. Conway tries to strip off Ferrer's dress but only manages to rip a small piece off of it."

Brad Blood: "What the? What's that in Manolo Ferrer's hand? He just blew powder into Conway's eyes! Conway clutches his eyes in pain! Ferrer rips off Conway's blouse! Is that a Victoria's Secret lace push-up bra?!"

Jim Jackson: "Conway is half exposed, if he loses the skirt it's all over! Manolo tries to grab for the skirt but Conway counters with a knee stunning Ferrer... Conway pulls on Manolo Ferrer's skirt... IT'S OFF!!!"

Brad Blood: "OH MY GOD!!! MY EYES!!! IT BURRRRRRRRRNSSSSSSSS!!!! MANOLO FERRER IN A G-STRING!!! AUUUUUUUUUGHHHHH!!!!"

Jim Jackson: "Conway tries to grab on to Manolo. Manolo brings out some powder again... CONWAY BEATS MANOLO FERRER TO THE PUNCH! OR TO THE BLOW!!! Conway blows Manolo's own powder into Manolo's face! Now it's Manolo Ferrer who is blinded! Conway lunges for Ferrer's top..."

Brad Blood: "Ferrer dodges in time and somehow counters with a spinning back elbow!"

Jim Jackson: "That stuns Conway! Ferrer grabs at Conway's skirt, Conway grabs at Manolo's top... Both men started pulling and tugging at each other article of clothing..."

SHRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIP!!!

Brad Blood: "Both articles of clothing come off at the same time... BUT WAIT!!! SNEAKY MANOLO FERRER STILL HAS A CAMISOLE OVER HIS BRA WHILE CONWAY IS NOW WEARING A T-BACK LACE PANTY! THIS MEANS MANOLO WINS!!!"

Jasmine Lee: "Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match... Manolo Ferrer!"

Jim Jackson: "Oh my god... This means... Conway is now out of The DWMA and now part of... The Age of Pain!"

Brad Blood: "Ferrer now has two champions in his team and a Boleto Dorado ticket holder too! This is insane! The DWMA are staring into the ring in disbelief! The Age of Pain are celebrating outside!"

Manolo Ferrer exits the ring, taking a mic as the referee tends to the downed Primo Ultimo Champion. The manager of the Age of Pain allows himself a half-smile as he looks at Alexander Conway.

Manolo Ferrer: "I normally wouldn't manage talent who don't want my services. But since it turns out you are the prize for me risking my life and health, then I'll take what I can get. Welcome to the Age of Pain, Mr. Conway.

Mr. Ferrer is carried onto the shoulders of Arnold Bold and Felix Schwarz, as the Age of Pain celebrate his victory over the Primo Ultimo Champion.

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Jim Jackson: "What a night. What a night... Who would have expected that Conway is now part of The Age of Pain? And poor Marcus..."

Brad Blood: "Man... The DWMA must be cursing at the top of their lungs right now. They won their match against Oriental Spices but lost Alexander Conway."

Jim Jackson: "And Brostar's departure... I would like to say a few words about it but well you know what they say, if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all..."

Brad Blood: "Well we have a great card planned up next week. So stay tuned folks. What else will happen next? Until next time, this is Brad Blood..."

Jim Jackson: "And this is Jim Jackson saying good night and see you next Sunday!"

Lucha Loco 04/03/2011 Ulolse10

Subject: Re: Lucha Loco 04/03/2011

» Lucha Loco 02/10/2011
» Lucha Loco 08/21/2011
» Lucha Loco 07/17/2011
» Lucha Loco 02/17/2011
» Lucha Loco 05/22/2011